I Don't Wanted This Earth
In the Heaven commons, God was thinking.
"Hm, I think I will create some kind of earth today," he whispered to his-self. God felt a longing in his heart and he knew that something was missing from his dull, planned life. He wanted a challenging one, where he could do whatever he wanted to without getting into any trouble. After all, he was God!
God sat in silence, until he suddenly felt large, clammy hands on his shoulders. "Ugh, guardian angels," he said under his breath.
"God, God, God!" the two plump angels shrieked in delight.
"What do you want? Earths, peoples, or animals?" God drawled condescendingly, removing the hands from his shoulders in distaste.
"Earths! Earths! Earths!" the angels yelled, using their hands to form globes above their hideous heads.
"Then go," God muttered, rolling his eyes.
Back in God's thoughts, he wanted to do it. Creating an earth would be a blast, because he'd be allowed to do whatever he wanted when he wanted to! And after he created all of that things, he would destroy them. God thought that he was the smartest creator ever. He did not even notice that the guardian angels were back.
'Blast,' he thought to his-self, 'I hate those guardian angels!'
But what God did not realize was that he had spoken aloud and the angels had heard every word.
"Meanie! Meanie! Meanie!" they cried to God's face.
'What did I do? I flirted with those angels!' God thought to his-self, his face transforming into a mask of tomatoes.
God, trying to redeem himself, slapped them in the face and left the commons to create some earths in peace and quiet.
Then, with the wave of his right hand, God created the earth as we know it today.
Every morning, God would watch his earth and smile to himself, knowing that he was the only God who had created an earth so lush and green as his.
The next morning, something happened that God would have never expected. He and the cuter guardian angel, who went by the name of Camille, had an intense conversation about wit.
"Could I sit here?" God had asked nervously, knowing that there was a 50 chance that he would get rejected by this beautiful angel.
"Of course, you got a freedom to choose where do you want to sit," she said cleverly.
"Thanks," God said, sitting down.
"You've come to study?" Camille asked.
"I've come here to ask you that do you know how to create a person, can you tell me how?" God asked.
"Okay. Here's how: just say it clearly, 'PERSON'," Camille corrected God.
God really knew how to do it, but he knew that Camille loved to correct people.
"Thank so much," God pleased Camille.
"You're welcome," Camille said as she smiled.
"Has anyone ever told you that you're the brightest angel in Heaven?" God asked.
"Well, they say I'm brilliant not the brightest," Camille said.
"I know what you feel when you're the brightest one in Heaven," God said seriously.
"Well, many don't know," Camille said, grinning.
"Having a lot of responsibility, and everybody thinks your life is easy, is what most people think, but actually not," God said.
"When you're more smarter, you're more sadder. That's really it," Camille said, with much emotion.
"Life is unfair, only people who feel all of the emotions know what life really is," God said.
"That's true. Angels don't need to take their life seriously, but, also have some fun," Camille said.
"Friends?" God asked as he offered his hand.
"Friends," answered Camille.
The next morning, God decided that it was time to have some fun, and create people. He started out by constructing a head from spare angel parts, and then a body, and lastly a heart. After he had the perfect man possible, he placed him in a garden and warned him not to touch anything.
Man was nervous, as he was not even allowed to touch the grass or water or trees. God cherished this items so much he himself couldn't even touch them.
God began to notice man's feets were touching his grass, and now he angry.
"Get off my grass!" God boomed angrily, in rage against stoopit man, "I must create some beasts," he whispered to his-self, rubbing his hands together.
God went to work at his lab at once, waving his hands in all directions, to create a zillion beasts.
"Badabing! Badaboom!" God yelled, cackling mirthlessly, as the beasts stampeded man.
"I will created a woman," God said to his-self, "to make man not so unhappy!"
Suddenly God hear a noise. 'Darn, here come the loony angel, Paulette!' God whispered to his-self, growling under his breath.
"Amazingly, hai," said Paulette with thick accents.
"Hello, Sunday is a fine day for Heaven to relax, what are you doing today?" God questioned sincerely, wishing to be rid of the ugliest angel ever.
"I have plan… To destroy your amazingly bad creation, the earth," Paulette said, smirking.
"Why, that is ingenious, maybe. But it's so crazy that I doubt it will work even in my wildest dreams…" God trailed off, thinking.
"I know that it's crazy, but it just might work!" Paulette squealed, inching closer to God.
"As you probably know, tears go by my cheeks often. I care deeply for man, and his wellbeing, though he doesn't know it," God said with great emotion, hot tears rolling down his cold cheeks, "My life isn't cool. I act like what I do normally because my dad is forcing me to do it," God admitted.
God sat in his commons, thinking to himself, when he finally announced a little answer to a big decision, "I don't wanted this earth!"
And with that, he destroyed the earth, and the man and woman, and every beast ever created.
Any spelling or grammar mistakes are my poetic license, and are intentionally made