"Hey viewers what up what up!? It's your boy Chris McLean again ready for yet another season of Total Drama. I'm here at the historic Sebring International Raceway.
Why? Let's face it peoples, the last four seasons of Total Drama sucked nuts. The first season that looked like an apparent knockoff of Survivor was boring. I tried the Hollywood and music approaches, but they backfired too. Heck, I've tried it out with twelve new characters, but that didn't work out well either. But, I've came up with an excellent idea. How about a more faster approach one with even more danger, speed, passion, and everything in between. Fans, welcome to Bridgestone presents Total Drama Champ Car powered by Ford."
(DRIVERS START YOUR ENGINES! Cars stop on grid, green light flashes, cars dash off into turn one)
Dear mom and dad, I'm doing fine You guys are on my mind You asked me what I wanted to be And now I think the answer is plain to see I want to be famous!
(Gwen, Duncan, Trent, and Courtney run four wide going into a hairpin.)
I want to live close to the sun,
Well, pack your bags cause I've already won.
Everything to prove nothing in my way,
I'll get there one day!
(Owen passes Lindsay as Courtney slides her car and hits the tire barriers.)
Cause I want to be famous!
(Tyler avoids a big crash and wins the race)
Nanana'nanaana nana nana I want to be, I want to be; I want to be famous
(Lindsay and Tyler kiss in victory lane)
I want to be, I want to be, I want to be famous
(Shows entire cast in front of the Winners Circle at the Sebring International Raceway)
"Alright then looks like the buses have arrived and here come the thirty six brave people ready to take on a 180 mph challenge. Of course we have last year's contestants: Mike, Anne Maria, Brick, Dakota, Lightning, Staci, Cameron, Dawn, Scott, Zoey, Sam, and Jo. Hey, how've you guys been?" Everybody answered weakly "Yeah good." Chris added "Oh and this other bus is coming carrying twenty four more victims. These are the people you recognize from years past. Here they are now: Duncan,
Gwen, Trent, Courtney, Tyler, Lindsay, Cody, Sierra, DJ, Beth, Harold, LeShawna, Justin, Heather, el p_che Alejandro, Owen, Izzy, Geoff, Bridgette, Ezekiel, Eva,
Noah, Katie, and Sadie."
"Alright McLean! What the hell do you want from us?" asked an angry Duncan. "Yeah! What the f_ are we doing here McLean?" asked Gwen.
"Well guys. This is Total Drama Champ Cars and we've decided to strap you in super fast turbocharged rockets proudly donated to us by Roger Penske, Chip Ganassi, Carl Haas, Derek Walker, Gerry Forsythe, Paul Gentilozzi, Jimmy Vasser, Alex Zanardi, and Kevin Kalkhoven. Anyways we will be racing at 22 tracks around the world, street tracks, road courses, ovals, take your pick. If you win a race you score 36 points. Being there are 36 drivers, last place will only get 1 point. If you lead a lap,
you'll get a bonus marker. Two points for fastest lap, three points for most laps led, and four laps for winning the pole. If you DNF, you will be bonked 5 points.
The fun part is, there will be absoultely NO ELIMINATIONS! That's right! NO ELIMINATIONS!"
"Aw crud!" said Trent. "I'll have to deal with this assh_ the whole season!"
"Hey, Trent! Guess what!?" taunted Duncan. "Shut up!"
"Moving on. This is the pit road and here are your cars. They're Lola B02/00s with Ford Cosworth power and Bridgestone tires. Beauties aren't they?"
"But I don't want to drive a ChampCar. I like the Indy Racing League cars." Courtney complained.
"Cool it and live with it Courtney," Chris said. "Okay in this hat I have numbers, what you see is what you'll get. That'll be your car got it? Oh and by the way, I've assigned you your teams. There will be three teams. The Screaming Gearslammers, The Killer Turbos, and The Rubber Scorchers."
TEAM LINEUP:
Screaming Gearslammers Killer Turbos Rubber Scorchers
1.-DJ 1.-Beth 1.-Mike
2.-Duncan 2.-Izzy 2.-Anne Maria
3.-Gwen 3.-Justin 3.-Brick
4.-Harold 4.-Lindsay 4.-Dakota
5.-Heather 5.-Owen 5.-Lightning
6.-LeShawna 6.-Trent 6.-Staci
7.-Cody 7.-Bridgette 7.-Cameron
8.-Courtney 8.-Ezekiel 8.-Dawn
9.-Sierra 9.-Eva 9.-Scott
10.-Katie 10.-Geoff 10.-Jo
11.-Noah 11.-Sadie 11.-Zoey
12.-Alejandro 12.-Tyler 12.-Sam
And so they drew numbers from the hat.
Screaming Gearslammers
Alejandro Burromuerto #51 Tecate Quaker State TV Azteca Escuderia Azteca
Cody Emmitt #2 McDonald's PacifiCare Newman-Haas
Duncan Nelson #3 Player's Forsythe INDECK
DJ Bennett #8 Shell Western Union RuSPORT
Harold Cheever #34 Mi-Jack Conquest
Noah Hayden #52 Avex Alpine Escuderia Azteca
Courtney Barlow #20 Visteon Patrick
Gwen Fahlenbock #32 Player's Forsythe INDECK
Heather Wilson #10 Pioneer Verizon Worldcom Mo Nunn
Katie Brown #11 Your Logo Here
LeShawna Edwards #31 All American Spirit
Sierra Obonbswain #6 Texaco Havoline Big K-Mart Newman-Haas
Killer Turbos
Ezekiel Oldring #27 KOOL Green
Geoff Petronijevic #17 PUMA BellMicro KV Tech
Justin Reid #9 Soriana Gigante CDW RuSPORT
Owen Carter #5 Corona Walker Racing
Trent McCord #14 Mi-Jack Conquest Tyler Jenkins #4 Target Ganassi
Beth Gadon #1 All American Spirit
Bridgette Fairlie #21 Sprint GulfStream KV Tech
Eva Chantrey #26 KOOL Green
Izzy Crown #15 Royal Automobile Club USbank KV Tech
Lindsay Mills #12 Target Ganassi
Sadie Lipson #13 Your Logo Here
Rubber Scorchers
Brick MacArthur #18 Ticketmaster Dale Coyne
Cameron Duhaney #33 Johnson Controls Rocketsports
Lightning Savage #29 Tide Conquest Mike #55 HERDEZ Bufalo Televisa
Sam Froud #28 Walmart Conquest
Scott Willis #19 Sonny's Pit Bar-Be-Q Dale Coyne Anne Maria #16 HERDEZ Dona Maria Comex
Dakota Beverley #7 Lexington Rocketsports
Dawn Medrek #23 Wellbox HVM
Jo Elliott #24 Aussie Vineyards Australia
Staci Peters #25 Aussie Vineyards Australia
Zoey Mamabolo #22 Pay By Touch HVM
MAJOR SPONSORS:
-7-Eleven -ampm -Argent -Banamex -Bridgestone -Briggs & Straton -Budweiser -Canadian Tire -CBS Sports -Centrix -Chevron -Coca-Cola -Corona -Craftsman -Dodge -Dr. Pepper -Eurosport -FedEx -Ford -FOX Sports/Speed -Global TV -Green Flag -HERDEZ -Hot Wheels -Kmart -Lexmark -McDonald's -Miller Lite -Molson -NBC Sports -Network Ten -PacifiCare -Pepsi -Pioneer -Player's -Rede Bandeirantes -RDS -Roshfrans -Sherwin Williams -Shell -Simple Green -Target -Tecate -Telmex -Telemundo -Televisa -TNT Sports -TSN -TV Azteca -Univision -Verizon Worldcom -Victoria Bitters -VISA -Yahoo!
-Walmart
SCHEDULE: (All non-race weekend sessions not broadcasted by Speed can be shown on TNT)
X.-Open Testing at Sebring
1.-St. Petersburg, 100 Laps, Speed
2.-Long Beach, 85 Laps, NBC
3.-Monterrey, 72 Laps, Speed/Azteca 7
4.-Brands Hatch, 165 Laps, CBS/EuroSport
5.-Lausitz, 154 Laps, CBS/EuroSport
6.-Milwaukee, 225 Laps, CBS (NIGHT RACE)
7.-Laguna Seca, 83 Laps, CBS
8.-Portland, 110 Laps, CBS
9.-Cleveland, 115 Laps, CBS (NIGHT RACE)
10.-Toronto, 85 Laps, CBS/GlobalTV
11.-San Jose, 97 Laps, NBC
12.-Road America, 55 Laps, Speed
13.-Edmonton, 75 Laps, CBS/GlobalTV
14.-Houston, 94 Laps, Speed (NIGHT RACE)
15.-Denver, 100 Laps, Speed
16.-Montreal, 80 Laps, NBC/GlobalTV
17.-Indianapolis, 100 Laps, NBC
18.-Las Vegas Speedway, 200 Laps, Speed (NIGHT RACE)
19.-Auto Club, 250 Laps, Speed
20.-Mexico City, 73 Laps, Speed/Azteca 13
21.-Miami, 105 Laps, CBS
22.-Surfers Paradise, 70 Laps, Speed/Network Ten (NIGHT RACE)
"Alright people you've got your cars and remember, you're watched on by big companies sponsoring you. So do your best! Every week will be a different track and at the end of the season whoever leads the standings will win the Vanderbilt Cup. Join us next time to see the thirty-six in action right here on Total Drama Champ Car!
See ya guys!"
