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"...and, of course, this is the same time period that Larry the Luckless led the failed invasion

of Canada. Who can give a year?" Professor Binns considered the class for a moment before

Lily Evans raised her hand.

"Yes, Miss Ellis?"

"1607, wasn't it?" She asked, flipping back her long red hair.

"Oh my god, Sirius," James leaned over and whispered, "Look at her...she's so...Sirius? What are you doing?"

Sirius moved a few inches back from James. "Nothing, why?" he asked, shielding the bit of parchment he had been writing on from James' view.

"No, really, what are you doing?"

"Nothing! I am most certainly not writing a book about you being gay!"

"Oh, well, that's good. Um, anyway, look at Evans! She has so much..."

"Oh James, you aren't fooling anybody."

"What? Hey, does that say I'm in love with you?"

"Um, well, artistic freedom, you know. Here, read it." Sirius handed a wad of parchment bits

to James.

James started to read under his breath, "James' Story, as told by Sirius. Once there was a boy named James! He was very gay! He was in love with his wondrous and lovely friend, Sirius, but Sirius was not gay, and this made James very sad. James was sad for ten years, until he met Raul. Raul was gay, too. So Raul and James got married and lived happily ever after. Until the year 1984, when James burned to death in a barn. Raul was sad, and promptly jumped off a running camel and smashed his brains. Obviously, the end...What the..."

"Good story," Remus said, who had been reading over James' shoulder, "Very realistic, Sirius."

"Hey, shut up! I am not gay. And I'm not in love with you!" James said angrily, throwing the papers at Sirius.

"I'm not the one who is going to marry someone named Raul." Sirius countered.

"Oooh, he's got you there," Peter put in.

"Shut up!"

"Class," came a voice from the doorway, "May I have your attention? Thank you." Professor Dumbledore entered, followed by a rather pale young man.

"Class, today I must introduce to you a new student. Here is Frederick Wintershed, your new fellow Gryffindor!"

The boy walked over and took a seat by Remus. He looked nervously over at the Marauders, but made no attempt to talk to them.

"Hey there, Frederick! My name is Sirius, and these are my friends James, Remus, and Peter. Nice to meet you, Freddie!"

"Thanks," Frederick said shyly, "But I preferred to be called Raul. It's my middle name."

"Ohh, bad luck." Sirius said, "1984 is coming pretty soon."

A/N: There was no reason.