Toad's Incredible Journey
X-Men err, the Brotherhood of mutants don't belong to me. They belong to marvel. I don't own Beavis and Butthead. It belongs to MTV or whoever the hell created them. Gawd I love those guys! (Sniff) Um anyways, Tom Green, Glen and Phil belong to themselves or MTV or whatever. Lenny belongs to Katella High School till he gets good grades and Tsunami AKA Sasami from Tenchi Muyo belongs to pioneer. ^_^ You can't sue me Lenny! Ya can't cause you got D's. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
At the brotherhood of evil mutants…Mystique, Sabretooth, and Toad have been left home alone…
Mystique: (Whiningly points towards the defrosted meat it the kitchen) You guys I'm so hungryyy!
Sabretooth: Don't look at me.
Toad: I can't cook.
Tsunami: (Murmurs to herself) I'll never cook another thing as long as I live!
(Tsunami has long bright blue hair and pink eyes)
Mystique: Well somebody cook something.
Tsunami: (Pissed off) Cook it yourself!
Mystique: Okay!
Toad/Sabretooth: NO!!!
Tsunami: Why not damn it! All she does is complain!
Toad: You have no idea. It all happened about a year ago…
(Flashback)
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Dinning Room Table
Sabretooth: Mystique! Hurry up I'm starving!
(Sabretooth puts a spoon up his nose)
Toad: (Annoyed) Quit playing around.
Mystique: (From kitchen) Just a minute!
Toad: Is it my imagination, or did it just get really hot in here?
Sabretooth: Hurry I'm starving!
Mystique: I said just a freaking minute!
*5 minutes later*
Toad: (Impatiently) Mystique hurry up!
Sabretooth: That's it. We're going in there!
Mystique: No! Don't go into the kitchen!
(Sabretooth and Toad storm into the kitchen)
Toad/Sabretooth: AHHHHHH! @_@
(Mystique is seen holding a fire extinguisher in one hand and burnt spaghetti in the other. Did I mention that the kitchen is gone ^-^)
Toad: Where's the kitchen?!
Sabretooth: Grrrr!
Mystique: Oops. Um, it burned down?
Sabretooth: (Sniff, sniff) What is that smell?
Toad: It smells like…gasoline?!
Mystique: Run!
(Mystique, Toad, and Sabretooth run out of the once beautiful kitchen)
BOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!
Toad/Sabretooth: AAAHHHH!
Mystique: IIIEEEEEE!
(Mystique, Toad, and Sabretooth go flying out a window from the impact of the explosion)
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(End of flashback)
Tsunami: Don't exaggerate.
Toad: I'm not!
Sabretooth: That's what really happened.
Tsunami: (Sarcastically) Right…
Mystique: No…it's the truth. That's what really happened.
Tsunami: (Surprised) Who taught you how to cook spaghetti?
Mystique: (Happily) Magneto!
Sabretooth: It took us 2000 dollars and 1000 hours to build a new kitchen.
Toad: That's why we vowed to never let Mystique cook again. NEVER!
Tsunami: Hey! One of you should buy Mc Donald's!
Sabretooth: I want Mc Donald's!
Mystique: NOOOOO! Not Mc Donald's! (Mystique jumped on the couch and settled down in a fetal position)
Toad: Crap. I wanted Chinese.
(Tsunami, Sabretooth, and even Mystique give Toad a nasty look)
Tsunami: So…who's gonna get it?
Mystique: Not me. Not me! Please not me, I use to have nightmares of Ronald McDonald as a child!
Sabretooth: Nope.
Tsunami: It was my idea so I'm not going.
(Everyone looks at Toad)
Toad: Why are you all staring at me? No…forget it. I'm not going to Mc Donald's!
45 seconds later…
Sabretooth: (Pushes Toad out the lair's door) Don't comeback without those cheeseburgers! ROARRRRR!
Mystique: No mayonnaise! And please, if you see Ronald McDonald kill him. Please for the love of Slim Fast shakes please KILL HIM! (Mystique burst into tears)
Tsunami: Here's the key to the truck.
(Throws car keys at Toad)
Toad: No. Not the Toyota!
Tsunami: (Winks at Toad)
(Toad blushes)
Tsunami: Bye!
(Tsunami slams the door at Toad)
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Mc Donald's
Toad: (From truck) I'd like four burgers. No mayonnaise.
Mc Donald's Trainee: Sorry buddy. We're closed. Try Burger World.
Toad: CRUD!
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Burger World
(Truck breaks down)
Toad: I hate Toyota's!
(Toad is forced to walk into Burger World)
Toad: (Walks up to counter) I'd like four cheeseburgers umm (Reads trainees name) Beavis?
Beavis: Uh-huh-huh-huh-huh-huh. (Yells at microphone) Hey Butthead! Uh, this guy wants a burger.
Butthead: (From grill) Uh-huh-huh-huh-huh-huh. This is gonna be cool.
(Butthead throws 4 rats on the grill)
5 minutes later…
Butthead: Hey Dumb-ass uh, catch!
(Throws the bag with cheeseburgers at Beavis)
Beavis: Owww! That's hot ya Buttcracker!
Butthead: Uh-huh-huh-huh-huh-huh. What an asshole.
(Beavis hands bag of cheeseburgers to Toad)
Beavis: (Politely) Here you go sir.
(For some unknown reason Beavis is eating packets of sugar @_@)
Toad: (Smells the bag) Hey…something's rotten here.
(Butthead walk from the grill to the counter so he can pester Beavis)
(Toad opens the bag to find 4 dead rats and 8 pieces of bread)
Toad: Is this some kind of joke?!
Beavis: Uhh?
Toad: There's a bunch of dead rats in here YOU'VE GOT TO BE KIDDING!
Beavis/butthead: Uh-huh-huh-huh-huh-huh. Uh-huh-huh-huh-huh-huh.
Toad: Arggg!!!
(Toad jump kicks Beavis and Butthead out the window)
Toad: Assholes.
(Outside Burger World)
Butthead: Uh-huh-huh-huh-huh-huh. That was cool.
Beavis: I am Cornholio, king of the bunghole. (Sugar rush is kicking in)
(Beavis gets up and starts to run around in circles)
Beavis: Bunghole! I need teepee for my bunghole!
Butthead: (Annoyed) Shut-up Beavis.
(Butthead slaps Beavis)
Beavis: Oww! Hey Butthead that hurt!
Butthead: Shut-up Beavis or I'm gonna stick my shoe horizontally up your ass.
(Beavis notices Toad)
Beavis: Hey Butthead, that guy keeps staring at us.
Butthead: Sir, maybe you should try Arby's Roast Beef Restaurants…Uh-huh-huh-huh-huh-huh.
Beavis: Um, yeah. Like it's the open 24 hours a day…
(Perhaps the smartest suggestion Beavis and Butthead will ever say in their lifetime)
Toad: Um thanks buddy. (Angrily) Catch!
(Toad tosses 4 rat burgers to Beavis and Butthead. Then he grabs 1 rat burger with his 24 ft long tongue and pops it into his mouth EWWW. The three remaining rat burgers hit Beavis on the head)
Beavis: (Shrieks like a girl) AHH! Get them off me! Get them off me!
Butthead: Uh-huh-huh-huh-huh-huh. Cool.
(Toad drives away on his cheep Toyota)
Butthead: Huh-huh. Let's follow him.
Beavis: Um, like I don't think that's a good idea.
Butthead: Shut-up asswipe.
(Butthead runs after Toad's Toyota.)
Beavis: Uhh? Butthead look out!
(Butthead runs straight into a truck. He gets hit.)
Butthead: Oww.
Beavis: Uh-huh-huh-huh-huh-huh. Cool.
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On his way to Arby's…Toad's cheep truck breaks down the road in front of a suburban neighborhood. It's two O'clock in the morning…
Toad: Come on you fucking piece of junk!
(Toad kicks the truck. He accidentally dents the door with a powerful frog kick)
Toad: CRAP!!!
(Toad goes towards a suburban house where he spots…Tom Green harassing a girl.)
Tom Green: Come on. I wanna meet your parents. I love the Beetles. (Note: Tom Green Show)
Tom Green: (Faces camera) We are here at Gigi's house. It's two 0' clock in the morning. (Whisper's) We are going to meet Gigi's parents. They love the beetles…hippies are cooool!
(Camera guy starts to sing, "My loneliness is killing me")
Glen: Eww, I hate that song. (He farts)
Phil: Whoa! You stink man!
Tom Green: (To himself) I must fire the camera guy. Must get Glen some Tums.
Gigi: Get away from me you creep or I'm calling the police!
Tom Green: Okay! Geez we're going.
(Toad walks up to Tom Green)
Toad: Tom Green! You're my idol! Can I have your autograph?
Tom Green: Sure buddy!
(Tom Green takes out his permanent marker and signs his name on Toad's rain jacket)
Unknown Voice: WHO THE FUCK IS MAKING ALL THAT RACKET DOWN THERE?!
Tom Green: What the fuck?
Glen: (To Gigi) Is that your father?
Gigi: You don't like him when he's angry…
(The ground starts to shake violently)
Unknown Voice: Gigi! I'm coming down there!
(A fat hippie barley exit's the house. He is naked…and very angry. No underwear.)
Tom Green: Whoa! This is gold! Are you taping this Lenny?
Lenny AKA Camera Guy: Whoa!
Phil: He was having sex cuss he's got no undies.
(Camera closes in on the fat hippie's privates)
Glen: Guy's I don't think this is a good idea…
(Fat hippie takes out a shotgun)
Lenny: Definitely not a good idea!
Toad: I'm outta here!
(Toad runs towards his cheep Toyota and drives away)
(As for Tom Green, Glen, Phil, and Lenny they run towards the forest behind the house)
Tom Green: Glen! (Huff puff) Glen. GLEN!!!
(Blair Witch Project ^-^)
(Tom Green and the camera guy are lost in the forest)
Tom Green: (Faces camera) I…am…so scared right now. Mom, dad, I'm sorry I harassed your privacy all these years. I think this time I went…too…far. But I have no regrets. I enjoyed pissing my brother off.
(Gunshots are heard in the background. Followed by Phil's moans. Big drops of mucus fall from Tom's nose)
Tom Green: (Shaky voice) Like I said…no regrets.
(A loud fart is heard from across the forest)
Tom Green: (Tries to exhale) Geez Glen! Can't you STOP FARTING FOR ONE FREAKING SECOND?!
Glen (From far away): Uh, no?
Lenny: What's that sound?
(A loud animal roar is heard. Tom Green makes funny faces at the camera…then the camera then goes black…)
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Arby's
(Toad walks up to counter)
Toad: Give…me…hamburgers…NOW!
Trainee: (Happily) Yes sir!
****
10 minutes later Toad is on his way back home with Arby's Roast Beef burgers.
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Brotherhood of Mutants Lair…
Toad: I'm back.
Tsunami/Sabretooth/Mystique: Where the hell did you go?!
Tsunami: I'm starving! You left at eight now it's (Looks at her watch) three O' clock?!
Mystique: You bastard! How long can it take a person to go to Mc Donald's and bring back 4 freaking, stinking cheeseburgers?!
Sabretooth: Toad you better have a damn good reason why you were so late or I'm gonna kick your ass!!!
(Toad tossed them the Arby's brown bag)
Sabretooth: THE HELL IS THIS?!
Tsunami: I said Mc Donald's not Arby's!
Mystique: This has mayonnaise!
Sabretooth: TOAD YOU FUCKING SOB…(CENSORED…all of it. The profanity is too strong. Even for me 0-~)
Tsunami: Forget McDonald's! I want Chinese.
(Sabretooth throws Toad out the door)
Toad: NO! Not again! Please let me back in! (Toad pounds on the door with his fists. Sabretooth is staring at Toad from a nearby window with a mean cat smile on his face) TSUNAMI! (Toad screams into the night)
Toad spends the rest of the night looking for Chinese food…
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Please review. I don't own the Flintstones. I have nothing against Ronald Mc Donald. I mean no disrespect to Tom Green. He's my idol! Beavis and Butthead are so cool. I had to hurt Butthead for a change because Beavis is always the one who gets treated Hurt. Beavis rules! Ehh…I got nothing against Glen and Phil or Arby's. Especially Lenny. I got nothing against hippie's ether.