A Fulfilled Life
(rough draft)
A Rurouni Kenshin fanfic by Raberba girl
Asexual Awareness Day, 19 February 2014
Dedicated to all the other ace Rurouni Kenshin fans out there. (In other words, no one. -.-)
Summary: Sanosuke is perfectly happy just the way he is. Modern AU. For Ace Awareness Day 2014.
A/N: Do not read this story. That was your warning, so if you choose to read this story anyway, it's your own fault if you don't like what you see.
o.o.o
It had been ages since Sanosuke had seen everyone, though it really was his own fault for traveling so much. Getting to see so many places and meet so many interesting people was great, but he had to admit, there was a significant bit of homesickness now being soothed as Kaoru opened the door for him, greeted him warmly, then escorted him into a room full of familiar faces.
"Enishi!" Kaoru called to her husband, "Look who made it!"
Enishi glanced away from where he was talking with his sister and gave the newcomer a cool look. "Hi. I'm Yukishiro Enishi, nice to meet you. And you are?"
"Enishi," Tomoe said reprovingly, though there was a twinkle in her eyes.
"I haven't been gone that long," Sanosuke snorted. "Nice to see you, too, Yukishiro."
Enishi grinned a little, raised his glass in a sort of salute, then turned back to Tomoe.
"Sano!" Yahiko pushed eagerly through the crowd, throwing his arms briefly around his old friend in a man-hug. "Are you crazy or something? Four postcards in five months, all from different countries - at least slow down and be a tourist if you're gonna hop around the world like that!"
"I can't help it, I've got wanderlust or something," Sanosuke laughed. "Geez, kid, you grew!"
"Not a kid anymore," Yahiko said proudly. He reached out for the wrist of the young woman beside him and held up her hand so that the engagement ring on one finger was plainly visible. She stared at Sanosuke with wide eyes, looking as if she was holding her breath to see whether he'd approve or not.
"Aw, man, jouchan!" Sanosuke teased, "What'd he bribe you with?"
"What?!" she exclaimed. "He- That is, I- We-!"
Sanosuke's smile softened, and he leaned in to give her a quick kiss on the cheek. "Congratulations, hon."
"Th-Thank you," she said, her expression relaxing into a relieved smile.
Sanosuke turned to find a certain redhead at his elbow, and his own smile broadened. "Kenshin."
"Sano," Kenshin acknowledged, also smiling widely as their hands met and clasped. "It's been too long."
"I'll say. The fights aren't as fun without you there to rile everyone up."
"Goodness, Sagara-san," Tomoe murmured, coming up beside her husband and offering Sanosuke a small smile of her own, "I would have thought you'd be up to the task of provoking your own customers."
He laughed. "Yeah, but the only ones who go for me are small fry. I miss the fun ones who had to make do with li'l old me while their bosses went for Kenshin."
"Well, I think most people here would agree that we're happy those days are behind us," Kaoru said firmly. "You want anything to eat or drink, Sanosuke? There's plenty in the kitchen."
"Sure. I'm kinda starving."
Sanosuke went to load up a plate, glad to see what looked like a good spread. Just as he found a place to sit down and start eating it, a man nearby spotted him and grinned widely. "Well, if it isn't Sagara! I was starting to think you were never coming back to Japan."
"And deny you all my awesomeness 'til the end of time? Never."
"Heh, modest as usual, I see. And still single, huh?"
"Yep." Why did they always ask?
"I'm telling you, sometimes I think you've got the right idea, keeping your options open."
Sanosuke raised an eyebrow. "Options?"
"You know. Getting your pick whenever you want, not having to sneak around or pacify the missus..."
"My pick of...? You mean girls?"
The man gave him a strange look. "What else!"
Sanosuke shook his head, pushing around the vegetables in his bowl in search of more fish. "You make it sound like grocery shopping."
"Heh, well, it is shopping, isn't it? Whether it's a hooker or a girlfriend, you still have to size them up and shell out the cash."
"I guess. Sounds like a pain." Sanosuke took another bite.
The man blinked. "Sounds like-? What?"
"Hiring a girl for the night or paying for a date or whatever."
"Sagara...you talk as if you've never done it before."
"I haven't." 'Man, this is good. Kenshin must've cooked it.'
"What-?! Do women just hop into your bed for free or something?!"
'Why is this such a big deal?' "I'm not into girls."
"But that- Oh. Ohhhhh."
Sanosuke frowned. "What?"
The man winked and nudged him. "So you swing that way, huh?"
"Dude, I'm not gay." This conversation had quickly gotten tiresome. Sanosuke glanced around idly, looking for a more familiar friend to hang out with.
"Oh, come on, no one here's going to rag on you for it. One of the guys where I work actually-"
"I'm not into women or men. I don't stay single in order to 'keep my options open,' I'm single because I like being single. And hey, sorry to cut this engrossing conversation short, but I think I see an old friend I haven't said hi to yet, so if you'll excuse me~" Sanosuke got up and made a beeline for Megumi without looking back.
"Well, look who it is," she murmured, leaning against the wall with a drink held idly in her hand.
"Yo."
"Long time no see."
"Yup." Sanosuke settled against the wall next to her and resumed work on his plate.
"Really, Sagara. Long, long, long time no see."
"Aw, you missed me?"
"Yes, you dolt."
Sanosuke paused and looked more closely at her. "Really?"
"I could have used a friend like you this past year."
Sanosuke followed her gaze to where Kenshin was standing with Tomoe and some others, the whole group of them suddenly bursting into laughter at something Yahiko had said. "Still?" he realized quietly.
Megumi took a sip of her drink.
Sanosuke put an arm around her and drew her close. She laid her head on his shoulder and sighed. "I keep thinking...it should be easier, now that he's married, shouldn't it? I tell myself the more I see them together, the less I'll love him, and finally maybe I'll be able to move on. But it...doesn't get better."
"I'm sorry," he said sincerely.
"It's my problem, not yours. But...thanks for your shoulder, Sagara."
He smiled. "Anytime, Takani." These sorts of things had never made any sense to him, he could never understand why people could be so deeply hurt by it. But he recognized pain when he saw it, and Megumi was a friend, and Sagara Sanosuke was loyal to his friends. "You want me to ask around, line up some guys for you...?" He kept his tone teasing, though simultaneously wondered if she'd say yes.
"No!" she laughed. "I keep comparing everyone to him, so it just makes it worse."
"Geez, your standards are high...Kenshin's like a class of his own."
"That he is," she said softly.
o.o.o.o.o
A few months later, Megumi was at work, tapping her pen absent-mindedly against her lips as she scanned through a report. "Not again..." She sighed and leaned down lower to write.
A shadow fell across her, and she glanced up. A smile immediately came to her face. "Need something?"
"Yeah, I- Um...I just, you looked...uh, not happy." Her co-worker sheepishly laid a chocolate bar down on her desk. "I thought you could use some cheering up..."
"You know," Megumi remarked, "sugar might give you an energy kick, but it gets processed quickly and then sends you crashing into even worse fatigue than before."
Akira blanched. "I...sorry, I just-"
"But these are my favorite, so I'd say it's worth it." She grinned and kept her eyes on him the entire time she was unwrapping the chocolate bar. Akira seemed to light up more and more as he watched, breathless with hopeful, anxious anticipation, until she finally broke off the first piece and popped it into her mouth. "Mmmm."
"You like it?" he asked diffidently.
"I told you. It's my favorite." She broke off about half of what was left and then handed the rest back to him. "But I'm watching what I eat, so be a dear and finish this up for me, will you?"
"Yes, ma'am! I mean...I just, uh, I'll take care of this for you." He hurried away, blushing and smiling a bit goofily, and Megumi's expression was affectionate as she watched him go. He was new to the company, sunshiney, eager, and pretty cute. Of course he was no Kenshin, but he was the first not-Kenshin to finally catch her interest. He didn't seem to be brave enough yet to actually ask her out, but whenever he did, she planned to say yes.
A shadow fell over Megumi again. She frowned in puzzlement and looked up, half-expecting Akira to be back, and was astonished to see who it actually was. "What are you doing here?!"
"Didn't wanna play phone tag, so I figured I'd just pick you up in person."
"Did you even try to call me first?"
"Nope." Sanosuke glanced over her desk. "You look busy."
"I am. I am very, very busy, Sagara."
"Great, so you could use a break."
She laughed. "I could, actually."
"Coffee, then. Let's go."
"What were you planning to do if I refused?"
"I dunno, carry you out of here bridal style?"
She rolled her eyes.
"I'm bored, and I have to get back to work soon. You, me, coffee, noooowwww."
"Fiiiiine, rooster head, just let me log out real quick and grab my purse."
As they were heading out the door together, someone called out to them almost frantically, "Takani-san!"
She turned back, and her heart melted at the hurt puppy expression on Akira's face as he hurried up to them.
"T-Takani-san... Is everything all right? This man isn't bothering you, is he?" He eyed Sanosuke's messy hair and work clothes.
Megumi heard Sanosuke scoff, and she elbowed him in the side. "No, I'm fine, Kiyosato-kun, I've known Sagara here for a long time. I'm going on break for a little while, and he stopped by to accompany me."
"Oh...you two are...uh...together...?"
"He's my cousin," Megumi lied, and felt her heart grow warm at the surprise and then tentative relief crossing her co-worker's face. "Sagara is my cousin. He's been out of the country for years and is finally back in town, so we've been getting together about once a week to catch up."
"Oh. Well, uh, nice to meet you," Akira said as he greeted Sanosuke.
"Hmmm," Sanosuke murmured, "I'm not sure I like you."
"What?!"
"You know," Megumi said, "Kiyosato-kun might look soft, but he walks me to the station every night after work. You should see the drunks who make passes at me after he's finished with them. You'd be impressed."
"Really. Well, snap a couple of photos next time so I can give my official stamp of approval."
"I'm a grown woman, Sagara Sanosuke, you have no say in whom I date."
"Date?!" Akira squeaked.
"But it's not wrong for me to want you to have the best, yeah?" Sanosuke continued.
"I think I'm doing pretty well to have anything," Megumi said meaningfully.
"Ah...right. And I guess you could do a lot worse." Sanosuke glanced over Akira one last time, then waved and headed off again.
"Takani-san," Akira whispered urgently before she could turn away, too, "when you get back- Um, I have something I'd l-like to ask you."
"Are you going to ask me out?"
"What?!" he exclaimed, as if he couldn't possibly figure out how she'd guessed.
"Because if you are, the answer's yes. Most likely. Depending on when and where." Probably shouldn't make it too easy on him.
"I-! I just-! I had some places in mind, but I...!"
"Think about it while I'm out, okay?" She smiled. "I'll be waiting."
"Y-Yes. Thank you, Takani-san..."
She nodded, then turned away and caught up to where Sanosuke was waiting for her.
"Sooo," he said as they headed out, "he seems..."
"I know he's young, and not...terribly bright. Neither are you."
"Hey!"
"But I like you, anyway. And I like him, he makes me feel happy. Which is...impressive, you know. And I wasn't lying about the drunks, he can handle himself in a fight."
"I'll believe it when I see it."
"When you do, you won't pick on him, will you? I like him, Sagara."
Sanosuke smiled. "As long as you're happy and taken care of, Takani, it's all good." He put an arm around her. "I'm happy for you."
"Really?" She stopped and searched his face. "You're really okay with it?"
"Man, you're trying to find someone after Kenshin. I kind of have to be okay with it, don't I? Wouldn't want you being miserable forever..."
"I mean, you're fine that it's him and not...you?"
The genuinely exasperated look he gave her was answer enough.
"I mean, I've only ever seen you as a friend, and don't get me wrong, you are a great friend, Sagara, when you're not wandering around the world forgetting to stay in touch. It's just that they say that men... Well, I wasn't sure how you felt."
"Trust me, Takani, if I was interested, I would have made a move a long time ago."
She pouted playfully.
"Yeah, whatever, you're a sexy fox lady," he said, rolling his eyes. "Just because I'm not going for it doesn't mean you don't still got it, okay?"
"Of course I still got it," she said haughtily, flipping her hair back.
"Though I don't see why you need your ego stroked when you've got puppy-face back there drooling over you."
"It's nice to feel attractive."
"I wouldn't know," he chuckled.
"You really don't envy us at all, do you," she said wonderingly.
"Hey, I'm happy, you're happy, everyone's happy, what's there to complain about?"
"Nothing, I guess."
"Exactly."
o.o.o
Author's Notes: I decided that Sanosuke is an aromantic asexual in my headcanon, so this was my chance to experiment with the idea. As usual, the story languished for a long time until I finally got enough motivation to finish by finding out that there's an Ace Awareness Day in 2014.
If you don't like the idea of Sano being an ace, or any of my pairing choices, or anything else that's a matter of opinion and interpretation: tough luck. I did give you all the warning you needed.
As far as the "awareness" part - if you have no idea what asexuality is, it's a term that describes people who never have any interest in sex, usually for their entire lives. (There is also the Gray-A category, for people who mostly have no interest in sex; but usually, aces never have any interest at all.) Yes, we do exist, and no, we are not defective; our physical/mental/emotional health and happiness is completely unrelated to sexual activity. Although we are capable of having sex, most of us never want to. Ever. Some may not be bothered by it, yet don't see anything particularly appealing in it even when they do have sex; a few might enjoy sex itself, yet have no need or desire for it and are totally fine without it. A lot of aces apparently still seek companions whom they can love without having sexual obligations (or they might have sex purely for their partner's sake), but people who are aromantic in addition to being ace don't even need a special companion, and are totally fine with the platonic love of family and friends.
Aces are not singles longing for the right partner, we're not repressed, we're not gay, we haven't vowed to be celibate; we simply have no interest. It is impossible to 'convert' or seduce us, so you'll have to just accept us for what we are. If any of that is news to you, then yay, you learned something new and Ace Awareness Day did its job.
"Jouchan" (a more informal form of "ojousan") means something like "young lady" in Japanese. I don't know how many people might take issue with Sano calling someone "jouchan" who's not zomgKaoru, but it's not a nickname specific to her. It's a term of address that can be used for any young woman.
I threw in some pairings because of story flow. If anyone's genuinely curious about my own pairing opinions (note that I like all of these as platonic pairings, but in this case, I'm referring to them as romance only):
Kenshin/Tomoe - Favorite romance pairing ever. :heart:
Enishi/Kaoru - I like it in AUs, but not (for the most part) in canon. Someday I will get around to writing the one canonverse exception.
Kenshin/Megumi - Even though I don't like it, it's totally canon (at least one-sided on her part), and therefore ought to get more attention in fandom.
Akira/Megumi - Yay crack ftw~
Yahiko/Tsubame - I didn't really like this pairing at first, but then someone made a comment one time that suddenly endeared me to it.
Sanosuke/Megumi - There are several reasons why I dislike this pairing as romance and stopped writing it. (Ftr, I did not write this story to be an anti-SanoMeg fic. I wrote it to explore the idea of Sano being an aro ace. The fact that it'll probably tick off a bunch of fans is just incidental.)