Title: 'Prettiest Elf'
Author: Kathryn Janeway AKA Becci
Summary: A new hit for Galadriel. A song fic.
Notes: This is sung to the tune of 'Woman in Love' by Barbara Streisand, who is an amazing singer, and a dear friend of Celine Dion, my personal idol. This is one of Streisand's most amazing songs.
Prettiest Elf.
I am a blonde Elven Queen,
From Lothlorien,
It's a sparkly place.
I have a magic mirror,
And stare at my reflection
All day and night.
I really want the One Ring,
To match Nenya,
Make me Middle Earths Queen.
All shall love and despair!
And I will be Queen!
Lovely and green!
I am the Prettiest Elf,
And I'll do anything,
To rip off 'Legless's' head,
Put it in the dustbin.
Did you know he dyes his hair?
Over and over again!
Look at his roots!
I have a gorgeous husband,
Called Celeborn,
I'm more important than him.
He had just two speaking lines,
And I had twenty minutes
Of speaking time.
I hate my damned son-in-law,
He wears purple,
Arwen's purple gowns.
He thinks he's better than me!
Tiaras and all!
But Elrond's a girl!
I am the Prettiest Elf,
And I'll do anything,
To rip off Legless's head,
Put it in the dustbin.
Did you know he dyes his hair?
Over and over again!
Look at his roots!
I am the Prettiest Elf!
Hey I'm talking to you!
I'll scoop out Legless's guts,
And mash them into soup.
I was Miss Middle Earth!
1000 years running!
I am the Prettiest Elf,
And I'll do anything,
To rip off Legless's head,
Put it in the dustbin.
Did you know he dyes his hair?
Over and over again!
Look at his roots!
(Repeat until fade.)
A/N: No offence was meant against dear Nancy boy Legolas in this song fic, but come on! Galadriel is so much prettier! Cate Blanchett rawks! Please R/R and keep in mind - I do not hate Legolas, and it was only abit of fun - when you're flaming me, and please read my Star Trek: Voyager fan fiction if you'd like to try another category, and don't hate Star Trek. J/C rocks! Also, Celeborn is so darn cute! I love elves! Is it a fetish?