Summary: What if Sydney changes her mind about Adrian, and goes back to his apartment to tell him how she feels? Set just after Golden Lily.(And yes, this is a 100% pure fluff one-shot)
Disclaimer: Richelle Mead owns bloodlines. You didn't know that, did you? :3
I was grasping Latte's steering wheel in a death grip. I needed to calm down. Like, seriously calm down. I slowly breathed in, then breathed out again, and repeated that action several times. In.. Out.. counting every breath I took. That was the way the Alchemists taught me to control my fear when dealing with vampires.
Except, I wasn't afraid right now. I was confused. Adrian had kissed me. He.. He loved... no, had a crush on me. That was wrong in so many ways. But it wasn't like I had even thought about that when his lips met mine.
"It goes against everything I know. It isn't right. Unnatural, even" I said the words out loud, but somehow, they sounded wrong. Like I didn't believe them myself. Adrian wasn't unnatural. He was the most natural person I knew. I understood him, and he understood me. Or so I had thought.
But it hadn't felt wrong, that moment, when his lips met mine, when all the voices in my head went silent.. It had been everything I'd wanted to feel. Everything I'd dreamed of feeling. No book about kissing or relationships could describe it. Warm, and sweet and soft, but at the same time so strong, no force in the world could stop it. But still.. "It was wrong!" I yelled at the red Peugeot driving in front of me.
Then, I realized that I had taken the wrong turn. In a serious lapse of control I cursed. What the hell was going on with me? I never used to made mistakes when driving. And I used to never lose control. But I also never used to get kissed by unbelievably hot vampire guys.
Unbelievably hot? Did I just think that? What was wrong with me? I might just need to send myself to re-education. While I was at it, I should also report that Adrian kissed me, maybe even make a sexual assault out of it so he would be sent away, and the Alchemist could rest easy believing all vampires were evil. It would be the good-alchemist thing to do. The moral thing to do
Or was it?
Doing the right thing, being a good Alchemist never had been a problem to me. I'd always understood the reasoning behind everything we did, I had never questioned it. But now, with Adrian.. Something changed. I started to wonder if being just a good alchemist, would allow me to still be myself. If I could still be the person I really was, and not the person they taught me to be.
The Alchemists had always controlled my life. I absentmindedly touched the golden lily on my cheek. They had marked me as theirs. The ink was as permanent as the beliefs they'd taught me. And yet… The image of Adrian, staring after me with eyes full of pain was hurting me more than I wanted to admit. It broke my heart, when I had broken his. Those beautiful green eyes, that seemed to look straight trough me. I had caused him so much pain. I had caused myself so much pain. This couldn't be right, something that was right didn't hurt so much. Even the Alchemist side of me accepted that.
Then I remembered how the Alchemists had lied about Marcus Finch. They must have known he had been an alchemist. That kind of records didn't just disappear. And if they lied about that, how many other things were a lie too?
It was a terrifying thought, that the people who taught me everything, might not be telling the truth. How many times had I been told that just looking at a situation one way could never reveal all its possibilities, and that looking at it differently, gaining perspective, was important to come up with the best solution possible. And yet, here I was, only believing what one group, with just one perspective had told me about the entire world of Moroi and Dhampirs!
Stupid. I suddenly turned latte around, earning a murderous glare from the guy driving behind me. I ignored him. When I pulled up to His appartment, Adrian wasn't outside anymore. I knocked on the door, but no one opened it. I needed to find Adrian. I needed to tell him that I was sorry and that I understood him like he understands me. I needed to tell him everything.
I knew he was inside, because the lights inside were turned on. I slammed my hand on the doorbell, but nobody opened the door. Apparently Adrian didn't feel like letting visitors in.
I looked around for ways to get in. The window on the second floor was open, and before I knew it, I was climbing the uneven bricks in the wall, one foot after another. I almost wished I could tape myself and show to my P.E. teacher. But just as that thought entered my head, I slipped. I let out a yell as I fell down, but I still managed to keep holding on a large brick with my hands. The stone had scraped my arm, and blood was streaming from the wound, dripping on my neat, clear blue converse shoes.
"Damn it." I muttered.
Then, Adrian appeared in the window. He had a bottle in his hand, apparently he'd already begun to drown his sorrow in alcohol. His eyes looked sad, but they widened when he noticed me.
"Sage? What the hell are you doing here?"
Then he noticed my arm.
"What did you do? Your arm is bleeding!"
"Thank you, Captain Obvious." I said, slightly annoyed that he had caught me trying (and failing) to climb his house. I pulled myself up, until I was able to grab the window pane.
I tried to get in, but it proved to be harder than it had looked from down. Adrian hesitantly reached out his hand, and I took it. The connection felt warm, and soft.
He managed to get me in, and stared down at our hands. I didn't let go of his, he didn't let go of mine.
"So, what are you doing here, after breaking my heart?" Adrian said, obviously trying to keep his tone light.
"I need to talk to you."
"You could have just called" I looked up at him, shocked at the sudden anger in voice. But I understood. Of course he was mad at me. I had hurt him.
"I'm sorry, Adrian. About what I did, how I left you today. This is really hard for me.."
I looked up at him. He was gripping the bottle with both hands. I was worried he might shatter it.
"I want to tell you how I feel." But did I even know how I felt? A voice inside my head whispered. I just started talking anyway.
"The Alchemists always taught me to control my feelings, especially when it comes to vampire-business. I'm supposed to always know right from wrong, good from evil, vampires from humans. And I always knew. Until I met you. When I'm with you.. I just stop thinking. And I figured, how can something so amazing, the way I feel when I'm with you, be that bad."
I stopped talking. The blood was dripping from my arm, onto our hands.
"Sage, you'll need to take care of that. You'll bleed to death if you don't watch out." His voice sounded strange, different. I looked at him. He didn't believe me. Then, I made a decision. I held out my arm towards him.
"Will you heal me?" I asked.
His eyes widened in disbelief.
"You want me to heal you?" He stared at me, astonished.
"Yes. I trust you." I said. And when I looked into his eyes, I knew it was true.
His hand touched my arm softly, and I cringed when it made contact with my wound. Then, warmth of his powers spread through me. I looked into his emerald eyes, marveling at the color they had in the light. And it never felt more right. Why had I been afraid of this? This magic was part of Adrian, and I loved it, just like I loved him. I could see that now. I'd been in love with him all this time.
I looked down at his hands on my arm. The cut was gone. I looked up to him, and then leaned forward, placing my hand on his neck, and pulled him closer, until our foreheads met.
"Thank you." I whispered.
And then I kissed him. And it was like that first time, all over again. Except, this time I knew what I was doing, which made it so much better. I moved even closer, pressing my body to his as our lips moved. My hand tangled in his hair, his hand on my hip. Our lips parted, and the world was nothing but blurry colors around us. We didn't stop kissing, until we were both breathless.
Then, he looked at me.
"Sage, what are you doing?" He demanded. "I've never had somebody break my heart in such a strange way"
"I'm not." I breathed.
"Not what?"
"Breaking your heart." I finally caught my breath again. "Adrian Ivashkov, I'm in love with you."
He looked at me, incredulously. "An hour ago, you weren't even ready to admit that you liked me. And now you are in love with me? Have you been taking drugs?"
"No!" I said pretending to be outraged. "I just realized I've been looking at things with the wrong perspective, that's all. But I can leave again, if you want me to." I realized then that I might have scared him with my sudden change of heart, and I got nervous. Maybe he wanted me to leave. Maybe he had just been fooling around when he'd kissed me before.
But then his eyes met mine, and all my doubts were erased. What I saw there was pure love, and longing. "I don't want you to ever leave again. I love you too, little Alchemist." And he leaned in for another kiss.
This is the most unbelievably cheesy thing I ever wrote. Three cheers for impossible character development, right! I just really felt like doing this, after working on my other story, where I have to write a difficult dialoge between them, I was just like; "And NOW i'm getting them together."
Will you tell me your thoughts in a review? It would make me so happy!
Oh, and also.. This kind of thing has probably already been written a million times, so sorry if you feel like I stole your idea. (I didn't though)