Simple Kind of Life

Chapter One: The Question

She had always wanted more… to be liked more, to have more friends, for life to be more exciting. It was just always that way. She never bothered to ask herself why. She never took the time to stop and examine the reasons behind her needs. It had never been something she gave much if any thought about and really why would she? It was just something that had been… something that was apart of who she was. She never wanted normality. She had always wanted things over the top… the extraordinary… to be different but not strange… to stand out from the crowd but not to be ostracized. She always felt this uncontrollable need to be more then what she was inside. To be separate from the rest without being weird and she had never once questioned her feelings… until now.

As she stood on the edge of what seemed like nothing and everything at once that's all she could do. The rain hitting the top of her head, soaking her hair and running down onto her pale cheeks she felt herself at a lost… for the first time ever…

"I can't give you what you need..."

His words echoed in her ears and pounded on her heart as relentlessly as the torrential rain around her. Her tears… real tears… not those superficial ones that she shed on an everyday basis when something didn't go her way, or when she got stuck after school on Home Ec duties cutting cabbage all afternoon! This was pain… an ache inside her chest traveling throughout her entire body. It was real… so damn real… and she was confused.

He couldn't give her what she needed… but couldn't he see? Didn't he understand that he had already given her everything that she needed… had made her feel accepted just by being alive… what more could there be?

Why?

Why would he say that? Why would he think that he wasn't enough? She had always wanted this… always wanted someone like him…

Why?

Why did she? Why was she so enamored with the idea of being more then everyone else… having something different…

'Because deep down you know just how plain you really are!'

The voice was neither malicious nor friendly… just all knowing… unapologetic truth.

She was plain… and because of that she strived for those things that weren't… made every effort to seek out those tiny things that set her apart… made her more special… more admired… just more.

Contrary to what others around her might think… she was pretty perceptive. Perhaps not as much as Riku but nonetheless she knew… she knew that she wasn't that great… that when it really came down to it… she was just like every other girl…sure maybe her hair was a little shinier… her eyes somewhat brighter than others… but she was no Riku. She wasn't… unique.

Whatever she did wasn't going to change the world. No one would remember her as anything more than a pretty face and she wanted more than that. Perhaps that's why she wanted to be loved by someone who was special; someone who was unique and would leave a mark on the world.

She knew that it was pathetic, to base your importance on the love of someone else… but that's all she had. When it came down to it that's how she found a way to measure up in this world.

So that's what she did… she pushed herself onto the most unique man she knew and found rejection in what she believed would be acceptance. She had used what she had to make herself appealing, always dressing like a lady, speaking softly, smiling brightly…

'It's not enough! You're not enough!'

Clasping her hands over her now wet ears she shook her head slightly trying to block out the voice in her head. "It's all I have… It's all I can do." She cried as her legs gave out beneath her and her knees, so smooth and well groomed, hit the mud encased ground.

"Dark!" She screamed out into the gusty night. Her scream mingling with the howling wind, nature seemed to be feeding off of her emotions, reacting to her tears, mocking her pain. "Dark!" She screamed again her voice straining against her body begging for her to stop. It wasn't use to this… it didn't understand the exertion she was exhibiting. Falling slightly forward she balled up her hands into fists for the first time in years with frustration and hit the ground. "I can't… I don't know how… to do this." She whispered.

There she sat, kneeling in the rain, covered in mud staring at her fists wondering what had gone wrong for moments before she felt the hand on her shoulder… the comforting hand on her shoulder that always seemed to know when she was in trouble… when she needed a friend. Looking over her shoulder she felt the broken smile on her lips.

"Daisuke…" She cried and without a second thought she wrapped her arms around his waist and held onto him… crying into his midsection not caring that she was being completely unladylike. It was Daisuke. It was her friend. It was okay.