Just a short oneshot I wrote, re-imagining the events of the motel scene from 8x08 :-)
"-I'm afraid I might kill myself."
Those words hit Dean hard. His stomach dropped and he found himself simply staring into the Cas' eyes, that were brimming with emotion. He was lost for words, and the pain that hit him was a jolt inside him, a realisation of what he knew, deep down, was true. For a while now, Dean had doubts about their relationship, that what he felt for Cas wasn't ordinary brotherly affection, but something more. He'd pushed them to the back of his mind, ignoring them and trying to carry on as normal. But what Cas had just told him had let them free once again. He was pretty sure he'd always known that he felt more.
Dean tentatively reached out and placed his hand over Cas' knee, gripping firmly. 'I need you, Cas.' He felt his insides squirm with the knowledge of the connotations of the touch, but he didn't move it.
Cas' eyes slowly cast down to the hand on his knee. "I can't-"
Going on pure gut instinct, Dean moved forward off the bed and pressed his lips against his, a mixture of excitement and horror cursing through his veins.
Cas' lips stayed still under his, and he moved away quickly, standing up awkwardly. Cas looked up at him, eyes wide with shock and his lips slightly parted.
Dean instantly felt regret. Cas had just opened up to him, finally had the courage to tell Dean how he was truly feeling, and Dean had hit him with something as big as that. Cas was probably confused as hell now, how could he have been so stupid?
"Cas, I-"
But Cas stood up, reached a hand around the back of Dean's neck and pulled him forward and silenced him with a kiss. Dean melted into it immediately, moving forward to get closer.
The movement made Cas hobbled backwards, the back of his legs hitting the edge of the bed. His hands began to move away from Dean to stop his fall but Dean quickly put an arm around his back, turning him so he fell length ways on the bed, Dean toppling half on him. Cas' hands reached around his waist and pulled him close as Dean's frantically roamed Cas' body, eventually weaving into his hair.
Dean deepened the kiss and felt Cas hesitate momentarily beneath him, before returning the kiss just as enthusiastically.
Dean pulled himself over so that he was completely on top of him and he felt Cas elicit a quiet moan at the contact. Dean's arousal immediately went south as he grasped a hand to Cas' hip, pushing a thigh in between the legs beneath him.
Cas pushed up at the new friction which caused Dean to moan. He broke apart from the kiss and lifted himself up slightly, both him and Cas breathing heavily. Cas looked up at him, eyes wide, his lips swollen and pink, partly open.
Suddenly the door opened and Dean scrambled off Cas in a tangle of limbs, rolling sideways and off the bed. He breathed a quiet yelp of pain as he landed on the floor in a heap.
"Hey guys, I found… what are you doing?" Sam asked, eyeing Dean sat on the floor. Dean stared back, frozen, and watched as Sam's eyes drifted to look at Cas, lay on the bed, his clothes and hair decidedly ruffled. His eyes widened with shock-
"Cas pushed me over. We were, er, practising, erm, fighting. Yeah." Dean interrupted, getting up slowly and rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly.
Sam looked back to Dean, and so did Cas, both of them sporting confused expressions.
"Were you two-"
"I don't understand your definition of fighting, Dean-"
"Shut up, Cas! Sam, don't say a word." Dean decided he'd rather go back to hell that hear whatever Sam was going to say, so he grabbed the impala's keys and all but ran out of the motel door.
Dean was not looking forward to tomorrow's inevitable questions.