Disclaimer: I do not own Prince of Tennis.
A/N: So this is kind of a song-fic. See, I rediscovered a song I used to love, and this just came to mind. My first FujiRyo. I adore this pair, and I never thought I would write my first thrill pair fic with angst. I'm just not an angst person. But the song requires it to be angst, so nothing I could have done about it. The song is 'Sick Enough to Die' and the artist is MC Mong. (If you look the song up, double check the artist because there's another song of the same title.) It's a Korean song, by the way, and I translated some of the lyrics into my story. Most of the lyrics come through Ryoma's thoughts. Please pay attention to Yumiko, since she's the one that would be telling you the back story. Throughout the whole story, Ryoma and Fuji never interact, but the story's carried out with their individual thoughts. Anyways, this is really short but pretty painful, so brace yourselves, here goes nothing:
Till That Day Comes
I'm in front of your house. Answer my call. It hurts. It hurts so much. Why did you break me like this?
"Syusuke, he's here again. Are you sure you don't want to tell him? It's your last chance. You're going away tomorrow," Yumiko glanced over worriedly.
"No," the words came out of Fuji's mouth painstakingly. His eyes were open but hollow. It was long since all the intensity had drained out of those once-sharp blue eyes. I can't tell him, I can't because it would hurt him. I never want to hurt Ryoma.
You've already hurt me beyond repair, Syusuke, what more could you do to me than shut me out like this? Ryoma looked up at the window which he knew to be the one to Fuji's bedroom. Of course he did, he had been there so many times. Then was when he still possessed the ability to smile. Smile at his boyfriend's words, his embrace, every little touch that used to light fire to his heart.
"Seems like you're hurting him even more by not telling him," Yumiko reached out, but she knew it was futile when Fuji stood up and left for his room. She gazed at Fuji's back with pain. She wrapped her face in her palms as she started to cry. It'd been about 8 months since her younger brother graduated from Seishun junior high and moved on to the high school. About 8 months since the diagnosis, the one that flipped the family upside down. About 8 months since he broke up with Ryoma in fear of him finding out and being hurt. And about two weeks since the family decided to send Syusuke to Europe for the surgery. One day until the flight. Yumiko looked up, tear-stained, and grabbed the medical papers lying on the table. She flipped through and stared at the operation's success rates for the thousandth time. Her hands trembled as she closed her eyes and opened them again, willing with all her mind for the number to change, for it to grow just one percent higher. But the figures were cruel.
Fuji sat on his bed for a while, trying to think about anything else. But his concentration crumbled as he heard rain starting to come down on the roof.
It's raining, just like that day you fell in love with me last year, ne, Syusuke? So come out here, I'm waiting. I'm waiting right here. And I'll wait here every day till I die.
Fuji reminded himself of the promise he'd made on his own the moment he got the diagnosis. He would never let himself look at Ryoma again, lest he be tempted to wrap him in his arms once more. Ryoma would never have to find out about it, and that was simply the way things had to be. He kept his windowpanes agonizingly shut.
Are you happy in there? Happy now that you've taken away all our memories, left nothing but a silence for me to choke on? Ryoma's sobs were quiet, they always had been, and the tears made no noise as they mixed with the rain. Don't tell me this is over. It's not over.
Fuji had told Ryoma hundreds of times that it was over. That they couldn't see each other again. Well, Syusuke smiled bitterly as the tears came, he never was a good listener.
Fuji's eyes blurred as memories came back of the few happy days they had shared. They stayed as photographs in his mind. The real photos had all been burnt, but it wasn't as easy in his head. Those moments were all he seemed to want to remember, and his heart never let him forget that dark green hair. He couldn't let go of that green hair. I love you so much, Ryoma, you would never understand. You couldn't possibly understand how painful it is for me to shut you out, when all I want to do is hold you in my arms again, to stroke your hair and look into your eyes, wipe those tears off because I can't stand it when you're so sad. But I need to do this for you. I can't love you anymore. It would just hurt you. It was all over by tomorrow. He just needed to hold his ground, survive this torture for one more day, then there would be thousands of miles between them. And after the operation… Maybe something even more impassable between them.
It's all over by tomorrow. Fuji's breathing turned harsh. He felt all his last efforts snap at the thought, and he found his body helplessly pulled to the window, found himself slamming it open. He knocked over a cactus with all the force, and the pot tumbled out, fell, shattered to bits. Fuji couldn't care less as he looked down- he could just make out a sobbing figure through the heavy rain. Ryoma's legs had given out and he was on his knees, crying onto the already-wet pavement. Ryoma didn't notice the window open above him, the window he'd been desperate to open ever since his senpai had graduated and left him without a word of explanation.
Syusuke, just answer me. Why? You love me. You told me you loved me. And I know you never lie. Why did you have to leave me? If this is hell, someone take me away. If this is a dream, then please, please someone wake me up. It hurts. It hurts so much.
Echizen, when you come back tomorrow… I won't be here.
With one last frustrated scream, Ryoma turned away and started to stagger down the street and away from the cursed house.
I'm coming back tomorrow.
I'm coming back tomorrow.
Ah! I ache just by writing this. Major ouch. Did I just write this and call it a story? Am I sure I haven't just been making it as painful as possible? Really, I highly doubt my writing skills now since my own writing hurts me. I promise to write more FujiRyo. I promise to return with much fluff. I need some heal time.