The Reason for it All
A Tsubasa Chronicle fanfic by Tyigra
Spoilers for up to book 18. Try http://groups. msn. com/TsubasaReservoirChroniclesOnlineManga (minus the spaces) if you want to read ahead. This started out as pure crack, but somehow turned into romance. However, if this really is Fei Wong's motivation, I will laugh my head off.
Fei Wong Reed looked down in triumph. At long last, his dream was going to come true. Before him, trapped in the center of a magic circle inside the ruins in the land of Clow, was the Princess Sakura, struggling helplessly against her bonds. To the side, encased in a magic hourglass, were her companions, yelling and beating in vain on the glass walls that imprisoned them.
Syaoran was desperate. This mustn't happen! If Fei Wong succeeded, not only would this Sakura loose all her magic as well all her memory once again, never to be recovered, but all other Sakuras in other dimensions would as well, including the Sakura he loved, the Card Captor. Beating on the glass with fury, he called out desperately to his clone. "You must stop this! I know you don't have half of my heart anymore, but the love you felt for this Sakura was your own! Don't let that love die! You're the only one that can save her!"
Clone-Syaoran's brown and blue eyes narrowed, but he stood firm. Princess Sakura looked at him pleadingly, but the Syaoran she knew and loved refused to meet her eyes. Laughing, Fei Wong Reed began to chant a spell that made the entire ruins glow with power. This was it. At last he was going to achieve his wish, a wish anyone can dream of but no one can grant.
He was going to bring the dead back to life.
How long had it been, he wondered, since the girl he loved died in his arms? She had been so innocent, despite the kinds of people that always approached her. He didn't know if these ruins would work to bring just anyone back to life, but he was sure it would work for her. Her life was an existence uniquely tied to multiple dimensions like no other. That was why he scattered the Princess's memories and forced her to visit so many other worlds, her magic powers unknowingly recording what he needed from every universe she visited. And now, that information was going to be used to recreate that girl's reality, to recreate her consciousness in the land of the living once more.
Inside their prison, Fai cursed his uselessness. Even though he desired death so badly, he wanted Sakura to live a happy life with the boy she loved. Yet now she was about to be turned into a blank doll, and the only one who could save her, the one she loved most in all the world, was just letting it happen. If only he could do something…his mind raced. The clone-Syaoran still had his blue eye, half of Fai's magic powers. Maybe there was some way he could reach him through the bond of his eyes. If only he wasn't so exhausted, he could use his halved magic to create a connection between them.
He needed to restore his strength. Turning, the one-eyed mage eyed the man who had forced him to keep living, the man who had become his source of life in order to save him. Kurogane's red eyes met his one blue, and the two crawled closer together, both still to exhausted to stand.
"I think…I have a plan," Fai whispered tentatively. "But I need to regain my strength." Without hesitation, Kurogane removed the bandage from his wrist and offered it to Fai to feed upon, but he pushed it aside. "No. This time it needs to be more…" Fai found himself unable finish his sentence. He hated this man. He hated him to the ends of the earth…didn't he? He had vowed never to forgive him, but time had given him the chance to appreciate what he had done. He couldn't let himself forgive this man, because if he did…if he did…but didn't the plan that had formed in his mind require him to give in? To save Sakura's life, could he surrender his anger and let the other feelings that he had pushed aside so harshly have free reign?
Trembling, Fai rose on his knees and placed his hands on Kurogane's shoulders, supported against the glass wall he sat beside. Kurogane's eyes, always sharp as a hawk's, widened as Fai leaned in, but he didn't move an inch. Unfastening the buckles on the larger man's collar, Fai stared at the large veins in his neck, pulsing with hot blood. His adams-apple bobbed as he swallowed nervously and leaned in, conscious of the firm muscles his cold hands were gripping. Kurogane radiated heat like a fire. Fai's lips brushed against his neck, but the other man didn't jump. Fangs glistened as he opened his mouth, then bit down in a sharp, swift motion.
If Mokona or the real Syaoran thought it an inappropriate time to be having such an unusually intimate feeding, if they noticed at all, they said nothing. A burning energy was warming Fai from head to toe as he drank deeply, his hands gripping firm shoulders as if they were an anchor in a storm. Something strong and comforting was wrapped around his body, and Fai realized that his prey was embracing him, pulling him as close as possible. He was being held like a lover in a passionate embrace. Fleetingly he remembered his longtime desire, ever since he had languished in that freezing prison in the snow, crying out for death to claim him. "I want to be loved by someone before I die!"
Not this man…not this man who forced him to become a vampire even though he knew he would be hated for it. Not this man who aggressively berated him whenever he tried to slip into despair. Not this man who was never fooled for a second by his empty smiles. No, he didn't want to love this man who stubbornly forced him to live and endured his hate-filled eyes without regret. He didn't want to be loved by this man. He didn't want to love this man.
But it was too late.
Retracting his fangs and staunching the blood with his scarf, Fai's lips moved upwards from the dark man's neck to his lips. Only now did Kurogane's body stiffen in surprise, both from the kiss and the equally unexpected moisture of tears rolling down Fai's cheeks onto his own. Fai had known this would happen, that if he had ever forgiven this man then they would become entirely too close, but at the moment his fear of letting someone into his heart was drowning in the much, much stronger feeling that he was trying to convey to Kuro-koi with all his might. Activating the magic power in his remaining eye, Fai tried to form a link to the one who held his other, and let his restraints crack and break in the torrent of emotion that was overwhelming all his senses.
Meanwhile, one blue eye and one brown were narrowed in concentration as clone-Syaoran fought off the unexpected attack. Unseen by Fei Wong Reed, the boy clutched his head as he tried to use the magic of his stolen eye to defend himself, but that only opened the connection more. A torrent of emotion was flooding into his mind; sorrow, regret, desperation, desire, fear, anger, but above all an overwhelmingly passionate love that threatened to awaken his own, almost forgotten feelings. Looking down at the struggling princess, memories flashed into his mind; accidental touches that brought blushes to both their faces; a hand held gently in sleep; Sakura's eyes staring at him without recognition; an unconscious Sakura held tightly in his arms, cold as death; a pouting Sakura telling him not to speak formally with her; a young Sakura giving him a birthday since he didn't know his own…the emotions flooding in through a link formed by a blue eye were resonating with his own, restoring them from the dark place he had locked them away at. He remembered something the boy he had been copied from had said to him when had first met.
"The fact that you consider this Sakura most precious to you doesn't come from my heart! It comes from yours!"
"That's right," Syaoran whispered in wonder. "I may be a copy but…my heart is my own! My feelings are real!" Mismatched eyes turned to stare at the princess, but instead of cold and unfeeling, this time they held strong determination. "My goal isn't to return all of Sakura's feathers. My goal is to save Sakura!"
Fei Wong's magic was suddenly interrupted as his servant ran into the magic circle and began to release the Princess's bonds. "What are you doing?" he yelled as he let loose a lightning strike at the interfering boy. Syaoran turned and defended with a shield made by Fai's magic, but it couldn't hold out. Fei Wong laughed as the boy flew out of the magic circle and slammed into the wall. "Do you really think you can defeat a descendant of Clow Reed with half the magic of a worthless Magician?"
Syaoran struggled to stand, obviously hurting from the blow. His eyes narrowed angrily. "How about the magic of a wonderful Magician and the direct descendant of Clow Reed?!" he yelled as he summoned up another spell. This time, however, the target was the hourglass that held the others captive.
"What?" Fei Wong gasped as the glass shattered, releasing those within. Both Syaorans released a torrent of magic at their enemy, while a newly invigorated Kurogane let loose a massive attack with sword and Fai used his powers to release Princess Sakura's bonds. As Fei Wong tried to repel the three attacks with his own powers, a bright light formed where they all met and suddenly exploded with great force. As everyone was blown back, the ruins of Clow began to crack and rumble, large pieces falling down from the ceiling.
Fei Wong's eyes widened as far as they could as he realized what was happening. If the ruins were destroyed, his wish could never be fulfilled! Forgetting about the others, he began using his magic to try to hold the ancient structure together. For a moment it looked like he was going to succeed, but then the walls began to fall inwards, encouraging the others to beat a hasty retreat. Taking Princess Sakura's arm, her Syaoran guided her as fast as he could up the crumbling steps. Kurogane cast one last look at the man who killed his mother, but upon feeling a gentle hand on his arm, he decided that he had much more important things to take care of. The heroes quickly made their escape as their enemy fell to his knees in the middle of his fading magic circle, hands shaking in disbelief and despair as the ruins crashed around him.
"No…come back to me…my wife…my Miyuki…"