Food Fighter
Mini-Fanfiction
The story begins with a shot of a grocery store aisle. Spongebob & Patrick race down the aisle riding the shopping cart like a rocketship while picking up some TV Dinners and other groceries on the way. They finally halt, all out of breath.
SPONGEBOB: Oh boy, all of this riding sure tired me out Pat!
PATRICK: Don't say that! Only say tired if Algebra is involved.
SPONGEBOB: …. Nah, Statistics.
Spongebob & Patrick race to the counter with their items.
SPONGEBOB: Now you have money right Pat?
PATRICK: Money what now?
SPONGEBOB: You know, the green stuff, what we pay with for items. I haven't got my weekly 5 cent paycheck from work yet.
PATRICK: Oh uh um.
TOM(Cashier and Chocolate Guy): Next!
Patrick loads all of the items on the counter while picking it up like a hefty man.
SPONGEBOB: I see you Pat.
PATRICK: How much?
TOM: $12.84.
Patrick takes out a piece of string and some belly button lint.
PATRICK: May I interest you in a barter my friend?
TOM: No money? No items!
Patrick's eyes drop and become serious.
SPONGEBOB(trying to avoid conflict): Well uh you heard the man Pat, let's go.
PATRICK: No! I am not leaving until I receive my Chicken Patties!
TOM: And you are not getting the meals until I get my money.
PATRICK: Oh wise guy eh?
TOM: I'm just doing my job Professor Stupid.
PATRICK: PROFESSOR STUPID?! YOU DARE MISTAKE ME FOR MY COUSIN?! Oh that's it!
Patrick steals some porridge from a woman in line named Abigail Marge.
ABIGAIL: Hey!
Patrick chucks the porridge into Tom's face.
TOM: Hey?! What gives?!
PATRICK: Call me Tubby and this becomes personal!
SPONGEBOB: Uh Patrick.
NAT PETERSON: Sweet! A food fight!
Tom the Chocolate guy looks around before taking off his work vest. Tom gets out a bowl of mashed potatoes and throws them right into Patrick's face making his jaw drop in shock. Spongebob puts his hand to his face.
SPONGEBOB: Oh barnacles.
After a moment of silence, Patrick and Tom break out into a severe food fight. From canned bread to Krabby patties to even an Old Man Jenkins all thrown around..
OLD MAN JENKINS: I don't want to be a burden.
This fight is already making headlines at the Barg-N-Mart.
TOM: Give it up starfish! Give me my money or receive some serious blows to the face!
PATRICK: Never!
Patrick pounds his chest and roars like a gorilla.
SPONGEBOB(confused): Huh?
Patrick is starting to lose the fight.
PATRICK: Noooo!
TOM: Yess!
Spongebob wants to help his friend win this abrupt and crazy food fight and then gets an idea. Spongebob goes to the vending machine, struggles but eventually gets inside and steals a chocolate bar before returning to the scene.
SPONGEBOB: Hey Tom! Want a chocolate?
Tom notices this and loses it.
TOM: CHOCOLATE!
Spongebob throws the chocolate bar across a far distance and Tom runs after it.
TOM: CHOCOLATE!
Spongebob & Patrick celebrate their win while others cheer for them. They gather their belongings and exit the store with satisfaction.
PATRICK: I really do have a cousin named Professor Stupid though.