Sookie slept. It was quiet and deep. She body battled cold symptoms; her mind struggled to stay sane after Tara's body had gone missing from the funeral home three nights before. She and Lafayette lost themselves in the search, they called, questioned, drove to New Orleans and back again. All they wanted was Tara's body. Sookie wanted to let her beautiful friend rest in a place where she could visit, bring her favorite flowers, miss her forever. Sookie had been fighting sleep for the last few days and now she was powerless against it. She couldn't remember the last time she rested her face against a pillow and felt her body unhook from its rigid motion. It was only a matter of time before they found her, so Bill said. Bill had pledged his support and tried to rally vampires from Area 5 and beyond but not many were willing to help find a dead human. Sookie was prone to bouts of crying. She would cry until her body collapsed in exhaustion but the minute she shut her eyes, all she would see was the blood coated floor and hear her own screams. She could feel herself getting close the edge of sanity. Lafayette wasn't in much better shape. His shock and despair caused him to keep a bottle of vodka close by so he could regularly fill a shot class when Sookie started to cry. When he wasn't sliding liquor down his throat, he punched a hole in Sookie's kitchen wall; each desperate pound made it bigger. Sookie didn't care. The two of them were ripped open.
By the third day of life without Tara, the funeral was set for noon. The wake would be at Merlotte's. The night before, Sookie's phone rang as she sat at the kitchen table with Lafayette. They held hands. Tears dripped down their noses. They didn't say a word. There was no sound except for their occasional sniffs.
"What do you mean her body is missing?" Sookie screamed into the phone.
No one had an answer for her. She was there and then she wasn't. She called Jason.
They racked their brains over who could have taken her, what they wanted with a dead Tara. The funeral home had no footage on camera of anyone in the building carrying anything out. They all agreed it was vampires. But what did they want with her? The three of them, Sookie especially, had a tiny spec of hope that maybe Tara could have been bewitched by one of Marnie's resurrection spells. Lafayette's spirit perked up when he tried to channel Jesus and see if he could talk to Tara, if Tara could inhabit him and give them clues. No one responded. Maybe, by some wondrous miracle she wasn't dead anymore. Maybe she walked right out of that funeral home. They paced the path of grief, madness and mystery. Lafayette and Sookie drove to different towns; they questioned everyone she knew in New Orleans, all her old high school friends. They questioned the funeral home, interrogated who handled her body. They went back to the Moon Goddess Imporium. Sookie went to Fangtasia to see Eric but he was gone, Pam too. Left the country, Ginger said. Didn't say where or when he would be back.
She saw Bill the night before. Bill wanted to be close, kiss her, hold her, help her mourn but she couldn't be around him knowing he wasn't doing all he could to help her find Tara. He claimed to be dealing with the backlash of Nan's death. Not many in the American Vampire League wanted to believe that she was killed by Marnie like Bill had try to spin.
Yesterday, Sookie sat in the silence of a closed Merlotte's. Sam, not knowing what else to do, swooshed a broom over the same stretch of floor in a catatonic haze. He tried to coax Sookie into eating some dinner. She remembered picking at a small mound of mashed potatoes Sam pushed in front of her. She ate a spoonful, started to cry and closed her eyes. She cried until she couldn't hold her head up. Her wet cheeks rested on the cold bar Tara used to wipe down when she helped Sam on busy nights. Everything went black. She breathed deeply and slept a dreamless sleep for a long time. She hoped to hear Gram's voice, to see Tara's face, to read someone's thoughts that would clue them into who took Tara's body but instead, a strange, soothing voice filled her head and an unexpected face appeared. She saw Godric.
"Be still, Sookie."
Sookie felt herself formalize in the dream. She and Godric sat on park bench. It was a sunny day and they were at the beach. Sookie could smell the salty air; she could feel the warm, grainy sand under her toes.
"Do you know where Tara is?" Sookie asked. Even in her subconscious she was searching.
"She'll be found soon enough," Godric said. "Those who seek with the eyes of love always find what they're looking for."
"How is Eric?" Godric asked.
"I don't know. I haven't seen him. I hope he's well. Though, I wish I knew for sure. I'm probably the last person he wants to talk to."
"You love him, do you not?"
"Yes. Very much." Sookie said with a hand over her heart.
"Does he know you love him?"
"I hope so. I hope he does. But, I messed everything up so badly."
"No you didn't. You were honest."
"Well the truth hurts. I know I hurt him."
Godric nodded. He brought his leg up on the bench to roll up his pants.
"Let's go for a walk." Godric grabbed Sookie's hand and they took wobbly steps to the shore. The day was crystal clear, the sun was high, there was no one at the beach but seagulls and strips of scattered sea weed. He walked into the surf and took delicate steps against the gentle waves. Sookie sighed at the cool water pushing against her feet.
"Why ask me about Eric?" Sookie said confused. "Can't you ask him yourself? You're his maker."
"I could but, I wanted to ask you. You know thereal Eric. And, he trusts you."
"I don't know how he still could. I let him down."
"We hurt the ones we love the most." Godric said.
"I guess so."
"I need you to tell him something for me."
"I don't know if you should trust me with something like that. I'm not exactly the most sane person right now," she said.
"Something big is coming. Something I don't think Eric can face alone. I'm worried for him."
"Is he in danger?" she asked.
"Yes."
Sookie felt her heart jump into a rapid beat.
"It's not physical harm. It's something much more sinister. I fear it will take everything Eric has to defeat it. It's too great a sacrifice for one person to make."
"What can we do to protect him?" she asked.
"There's not much we can do other than hope he makes the right choice."
"Choice?"
"He's going to need the full support of those who love him."
"I don't understand—
"Tell him the truth is at the start of all things." Godric said. He said a few words in Swedish that Sookie didn't know.
"Godric, what does that—?"
He didn't answer her. Sookie could feel the dream unraveling. She tried to fight against it.
"Godric! Tell me what that means! I can't tell him what I don't understand!"
"Go Sookie. Go. Do not fail. Protect Eric."
"Wait! I don't know how!" she shouted against the sound of crashing waves that grew louder and louder until she could only see Godric's moving mouth. The rushing water deafened her. She felt herself pull back from Godric's frame like she was staring out the back window of a moving car. She opened her eyes.
Sookie gasped and sat up quickly. The blood rushed to her head and made her lay back down. She was under her covers, in her bed, in the eternal warmth and safety of Gran's house. Her temples were wet with sweat. It was daytime. She stood up and saw her jeans on the floor. She was in the shirt she wore when she was in New Orleans with Lafayette. She opened her cell phone to see the date and time but the battery was dead. She opened her drawer and found Gran's old watch she never wore. It said 4:30pm. The daylight looked like it could be around that time. She wasn't sure she could trust Gran's watch. After Gran had passed, she swore she was going to replace the battery but she hadn't. She didn't want to meddle with something so precious as Gran's watch; what if it broke?
She stood up slowly and almost fell over. Sookie felt weak and dizzy like she had woken up from a night of too many long island ice teas. Eric. Godric. She thought of the dream. She thought of Eric. Her thoughts cradled her to Eric's kiss, his scent, his embrace. Her heart jumped into her throat at the thought of losing him. She started to shake. Sookie didn't know how much more dread she could handle before she fell apart completely. She would go to Fangtasia and deliver Godric's message. After all, there wasn't much time on earth with the people you love, at least the people she loved. She plugged in her phone charger before peeling off her clothes and stepping into the shower. The cool water awakened her further. She remembered the way the ocean looked in her dream; she smiled at the way the sunlight bounced of Godric's face. He wasn't as pale as she remembered. He seemed to spend a lot of time in the sunlight, in heaven or wherever special place he was. Godric looked like a golden cookie tinged with warmth. She washed her hair and body as quickly as she could but her rumbling stomach and light head wouldn't permit her to do anything too quickly.
She had few clean clothes in her closet after stuffing so many in her suitcase for overnight searches with Lafayette. Sookie grabbed a gingham print dress, white sweater and the first shoes she saw in her closet was a pair of tattered orange flip-flops she wore to the Renard Parish pool. She combed her fingers through her still-wet hair and took gentle steps down stairs. She called for Lafayette, Jason, anyone at all, but no one was in her home. The last few days were a blur in her mind. She remembered driving with Alcide somewhere, in town, out of town, she couldn't recall. She didn't even know remember how she got from Merlotte's to her bed? Sam? Jason? Jessica? The sleep had warbled the past frantic hours into an unrecognizable slide show of images, faces, sounds, and the deep pit in her stomach held the cold realization that she would never see Tara again. Yet again, Sookie was forced to say goodbye.
The night was warm and Sookie wasn't sure if it was unseasonable for the time of year. She couldn't remember the time she had heard the weather, the week, the month. She rolled down her windows to help her hair dry and opened her barely-charged cell phone. Lafayette didn't answer. Neither did Jason. Alicide's line rang and rang. Sookie laughed and bit her bottom lip when she realized, she didn't have Eric's cell phone number, only the number for Fangtasia. Her thumb hovered over the button to call Bill and stopped just short of pressing it. What would she say? What would she want to hear? He wasn't looking for Tara. He would have called her if he found her, if he knew anything. Plus, the sun wasn't down; he wouldn't be awake yet. There was no need to involve him, not now, not when all she wanted to do was find her best friend's body, put her arms around Eric and recall every precious detail of her time with Godric.
The drive to Shreveport went quickly, perhaps because Sookie's thoughts were thousands of miles from inside the car. As she meandered the back roads and saw the sunlight deadening through the windy trees, she nibbled on a Fuji apple that was almost too mushy to be eaten; she would have preferred it to be juiced so she could slurp down its essence. Fuji apples were Tara's favorite. Sookie's eyes gleamed with tears but she blinked them away before her vision blurred too much to see the road. She opened a tiny package of peanut butter crackers and shoved an entire cracker sandwich into her mouth as her stomach growled and churned for nourishment. Okay,okay. Sookie said to her stomach. The crackers filled most of the void but they dried her throat out. She would do about anything for a bottle of water. She saw a few general stores signs creep into her vision but she wasn't stopping the car. She kept swallowing the cracker bits, hoping more saliva would coat her mouth so she wouldn't choke. She popped a piece of cinnamon gum from her purse and felt relief as the cinnamon flavor summoned sweet juice off her tongue. A few more miles. A few more miles to Fangtasia.
It was near 6:15pm when she parked into Fangtasia's desolate lot. She banged on the locked front door, once, twice, three times, with the flat of her hand. She hit the door harder than she wanted. Ginger's unkempt, scatterbrained head popped out.
"Hey Sookie! We're not open yet," she smiled and started to close the door.
"Is Eric home?"
"He is. Got back yesterday."
"I need to talk to him."
"He's sleeping."
"That's fine. I'll wait."
"But— "
"I insist," Sookie said and pushed through the door.
The inside of Fangstasia was dark as ever but the floors were cleaned and the tables were spotless and ready for drinks, fangs, and flirtation.
"He's not going to be up for a while, sun's not quite down yet." Ginger said while walking behind the bar.
"It's okay, I don't mind."
Sookie pulled out a chair from one of the cocktail tables. Her butt didn't even touch the seat before she saw Eric's office door open. He was shirtless and perfect in a pair of black slacks. He was blinking and his hair was a bit messy like a young college student ripped out of bed to take a test.
"Sookie," he said, squelching a yawn.
"I'm sorry if I woke you."
"Come in."
Sookie walked towards Eric and left her purse on the table. She immediately wanted to go back and get it. Her cell phone was inside. What if they called with news of Tara? But she didn't turn back. Her eyes met Eric's as they pulled her to him. She walked past him into his office and he closed the door behind her. Sookie leaned against his desk.
"Why didn't you tell me where you were going?" Sookie said, anger in her voice.
Eric walked over to her so he stood over her frame, looking down on her wide eyes.
"I missed you," he said.
Sookie leapt onto him and tightened her arms around him. She squeezed him with all the strength she had. He squeezed her back and held her against him in a solid and soft embrace. She smelled his glorious scent that was uniquely his and placed soft kisses all over his cheeks and forehead until their lips found each other. Sookie felt her body fill with warmth, the comfort of being so close to him, to feel the love between them—Sookie overflowed with joy and started to cry as she kissed him. Eric broke their kiss and let Sookie lie on his shoulder and push out her whimpers. He pulled her face to his and wiped her tears with his hand.
"She will be found Sookie," Eric said softly.
"No." Sookie fell into a deeper bout of cries. "Whoever has her won't let her go," she sobbed.
"I promise you. Look at me," he said and brought Sookie's eyes to meet his. "I will find her."
"Why did you leave like that? I didn't know where you were!" Sookie said, partly yelling through her tears.
"I'm sorry. It was business. And Pam. She's… not speaking to me presently and with good reason. I've been very unfair."
"It's my fault. I'm sorry."
"Pam is who she is. Enough spa treatments should bring her around but I've done all I can do."
"Please don't leave like that again."
"I won't."
They hugged again and kissed with delicate lips.
"How can I make it up to you?" Eric asked while peeling Sookie's sweater off her shoulders. She winced at the cold air hitting her skin. Fangstasia was always chilly but tonight, with her frayed nerves and weary spirit, her body had little control over temperature. He wound her damp hair around his hand and pulled so her head was cradled in his hand and her neck dipped back—she looked up at him expectantly with slightly parted lips and soft breath. Eric's kiss was tearing down the walls of stress and slackening her body. She could feel her spine curving, softening to dough; all she wanted warmth and to feel Eric's body all around her, all she wanted was to wake up and not feel cold dread. As Eric kissed her mouth he could feel her lips slightly shake against his. He broke the kiss and saw her lips were slightly tinged blue; her skin was covered in goose bumps.
"You're cold."
"A little," she said as a slight shudder rippled through her.
Eric scooped up Sookie like a little girl. She latched her thighs around his waist, her arms around his neck. She placed delicate kisses along his neck as she watched Eric touch the wall with his hand and the entire section slid back to reveal a pitch dark space. Eric walked with Sookie into complete blackness. She tightened her grip around him when her eyes could no longer see him.
"Where are we?" she whispered. He kissed her forehead.
Sookie felt Eric unlink her and lower her body from his frame. She protested, not wanting to let go.
"Trust me," he said.
Sookie relented and her bum rested on a soft surface, her hands touched animal fur; it felt like a bed of feathers. She felt a soft blanket encircle her shoulders; it was heavy and pressed her body—heavier than any prized quilt Gran had ever made. She ran her fingers over the softness that she assumed was mink or chinchilla. It smelled of him—thick forest, campfire, a hint of vanilla. She grabbed onto Eric's hand.
"It's too dark. Don't let me go."
With that, a tiny spark from a lighter touched a wick and the room lit up with candlelight. The tall taper candle sat on a long black table at the foot of Eric's enormous bed. He lit another candle and another after that until Sookie could make out the immense room in the glowing light. There was a black chair in the corner, huge vaulted arches, paintings and book shelves on all sides.
"I had no idea this was here," she said.
"Not many do. I like it like that.
"So quiet. Calm," she said.
"I had it soundproofed. It's like a hearth—"
"Like a cave?" Sookie said, a large smile breaking across her face.
"Yes. Exactly." Eric looked away to hide his own smile. The two of them had lovely memories of their bodies connecting in a cave, a cave far away, long ago, a place only they knew.
Eric finished lighting the rest of the candles. Two on the night stand. A trio that hovered above their heads, fastened to rod iron loops. He lay down beside her and pulled her next to him so their faces were inches from the other; their legs and arms entwining. Eric rubbed the blanket on her shoulders and back.
"Warmer?"
"Yes," she smiled.
Sookie wanted to burst out her information about Godric, the dream, his message, but her mouth stayed close as she stared into his face. She could feel he had questions of his own, wanting to know if she had changed her mind, if she had realized it was only him she loved and not Bill, if finally, by some miracle, she decided to be his. The questions sat on the tops of their tongues, patiently waiting to be uttered while their eyes and hands connected, touched, their lips explored, their noses inhaled the familiar fragrances of each other. Sookie could feel herself filling with heat and desire. All the sadness, frustration, worry and stress were shrinking, fading, thinning in the secret, candle-lit room—in Eric's arms. She gave into it and let it consume her.
"I've dreamed of you. Here. With me. I've wanted to show you this place for so long," Eric said.
"It's amazing. I'm honored," Sookie said, her lips grazing his as she spoke.
"The honor is mine," Eric said as he inched the edge of his tongue inside her mouth. He kissed her deeply, full-mouthed, hungry lips; he instantly started to remove her clothes. Sookie let herself be taken. She met his mouth and trailed her hand down his torso until it rested on the solid length of his penis. The feel of it, hard and erect, sent her senses fluttering. She tugged at the sides of his pants and heard the soft click of his fangs break the silence. Sookie sighed at the glorious feeling of her bare skin against the soft fur. She lay naked, languid and tingling. Eric turned her away from him so his stomach pressed against her back. His hands covered every inch of her; he alternated between passionate and delicate touch. He lifted Sookie's thigh so her legs spread a part. He teased her by letting the tip of his penis tap against her vagina. He kissed and grabbed. Sookie relished the sensation he brought, she realized it was the first time she and Eric had been together since the spell was broken. This was the real Eric. This was his lust and hers, real, the two of them, no spells, no other worldly influence.
As Eric slid into her, Sookie exhaled a long breath and felt the passion turn into fervent need. Eric pulsed softly but increased the momentum as his mouth hovered over hers. Sookie guided Eric's hand up her leg, over her stomach, breasts, chest and neck until it knotted in her hair and deepened their kiss. She closed her eyes feeling the pressure, the heat; she smiled at the delicious taste of him. She could feel her pleasure building when Eric kissed her neck and pressed his hips against her sex. But then, something unwelcomed, a face, a thought, appeared in her head and she was powerless to stop it. Sookie saw Bill. She saw Tara, her head oozing blood. She heard Tara's cries. Sookie's body went rigid.
"What's wrong?" Eric asked.
"I don't know. I'm trying so hard to be in this place with you, to shut the world out. I can't."
She didn't want to tell Eric that Bill crept into her thoughts more often than she would like. Sookie turned her body around so she faced him.
"I'm sorry."
Eric put both hands on her cheeks.
"Look in my eyes," he said.
Sookie stared in. She put her arms around his neck.
"Stay with me. Focus on my touch."
Eric slid his hand down the length of Sookie's body until it stopped on the mound of her vagina. His middle finger traced the opening of her sex, wet with desire; he gently brushed against her clitoris and watched a shudder rippled through her. He grazed it again, back and forth. He made his finger slick with her fluid and traced tiny circles. Sookie battled the images. She closed her eyes.
"Open your eyes. Stay with me," Eric said.
He twirled and let his finger wander and push against the wet flesh. He got to the center and inched his way in until he was completely inside. Sookie grabbed onto Eric as the muscles in her legs quivered. Eric touched, pressed and teased in a way that made powerful currents shoot through her. She kissed him delicately, carefully navigating his sharp teeth though a part of her tingled against the danger of his puncture, the pairing of teasing pressure. His lips and tongue were delicate; they complimented his calculating touch. Sookie opened herself up. She arched and moaned, quivered and shook like flower petals in persistent wind. Sookie kept her eyes on him, biting her bottom lip. He continued his gentle teasing. He was pulling her from her thoughts, re-focusing her to the sensation between her legs. While never moving his hand, he commenced kissing her neck and moved lower until her breasts were against his lips. Sookie began to gasp. Words, wrapped in pleasure-filled whispers fell out of her mouth; words that made Eric's lust overflow.
"More Eric. More."
He kissed and played and Sookie's hands raked through his hair, gently scratching his scalp. She closed her eyes and saw herself on the bed, Eric consuming her. She saw the shape of her body, stretching and spreading.
"Don't stop. Please. Please."
The words echoed in Eric's head until he broke away and let his erect penis slide into her. He covered her mouth with his kiss and felt Sookie's release. He heard her heart race, felt the rush of her blood as it soared to meet the pleasure coursing through, flooding her, filling her like a deep well. She moaned and gasped and shook and repeated his name. Eric wanted to come, wanted to lose himself in her but there was something so rewarding, something greater than the physical pull of their love—he adored seeing her pleasure. Sookie spun against the sensation—the orgasmic intensity pulled at the center of her body and locked her in a tight grip of rolling ecstasy. Eric watched with loving eyes as Sookie slowly came down from the high. He continued to kiss her as she fell. Sookie heaved out breath and purposefully grazed her lip against one of his fangs. The delicate flesh along her mouth opened up. Eric pulled back in fear. Sookie pulled him to her slowly. She gathered the blood on the tip of her finger, entered Eric's parted mouth and touched it to the edge of Eric's tongue.
"I want you to," she said. His eyes bore into hers, his lust at the highest peak.
"Show me where," he whispered. He trailed her body with his mouth, planting a kiss at every new inch. Sookie cradled his face in her hands. He kissed and placed gentle bites along her hips, torso, until his mouth hovered over her sex. Sookie pressed his head against her inner thigh.
"Are you sure?" he whispered, his mouth against the soft flesh. She nodded. He widened his mouth and closed in, restrained, gentle. She winced and the warm sweetness filled his mouth. He swallowed a few full gulps and felt his muscles tick and tremble with the energy of her fairy life force. He broke away and licked the two punctures before sealing her wound with blood from his finger. He crawled up her body and laid on top of her, placing delicate kisses against her cheek, the side of her mouth. He ran his fingertips over her skin and felt the tiny patches of sweat. The scent of her body enveloped him. He laid his head on her chest, listening to the whir of her lungs, the deceleration of her breathing. Sookie floated and clung to her pleasure; she was suspended in a reverie she never wanted to leave.
"I love you." Sookie said to the firelight shadows.
"Stay. Stay with me always," he said.
Sookie didn't respond. There was a long moment of silence before she let the words out.
"Eric," she said, feeling the words lifting off. "I saw Godric in a dream."
Eric sat up gently. His face looked slightly confused, sad.
"Last night. He came to me. We went for a walk on the beach. He looked happy."
Eric looked away from her then. Sookie grabbed his arm.
"What did he say?" he asked.
"He told me to protect you. He said something's coming. Something that worries him."
Eric stood up. His nude body glowed in the orange light of the candles.
"Tell me what you're thinking," Sookie said, worry in her voice.
"I suppose I'm jealous. I don't dream of him. Though I want to. So much." Sookie grabbed his hand.
"Believe me, I wish you could have been there to interpret. I don't know why he did but I'll do whatever he says. He's worried and I'm worried too." She squeezed his hands tightly.
"I can't imagine you not in my life," she said.
Eric kissed her tenderly.
"He said something about the truth being at the start of all things. Do you know what that means?" she asked.
"Sookie, I welcome death to protect you. That's how it will be. That's how I want it."
"No." Sookie shook her head. "Everyone I love is taken from me and I can't stand it anymore. Godric summoned me and that's that."
"It's pointless to convince you otherwise."
"Damn straight," Sookie said. They smiled at each other.
"He must trust you," Eric said.
"Or maybe he tapped the only fairy he could find to be in your corner."
Eric shook his head. "No. Godric sees deeper than any existing vampire. Even in death he sees. He knows your heart."
They sat in silence. Eric kissed her forehead. Without warning the sinking feeling returned, the feeling of careening down an elevator shaft. Sookie closed her eyes and saw Tara's bloody face. She shook.
"Tell me." Eric looked at her with concern, feeling her fear, her emptiness.
"I have to go. I have to find Tara," she said.
"I'm going with you," he said.
Sookie's face showed her worry. "What if whoever has Tara is the one Godric is warning me about?"
"Well, we're going to meet sooner or later," he said.
"No. No Eric. Please. I can't even think of what I would do if you were taken from me."
Eric saw the pain in her face, watched her eyes fill with tears.
"I promise to be careful. I'm going with you."
"But—
"It's done," Eric said and kissed her on the mouth.
His words made Sookie's heart hurt. Yes. She did think of them together. All of her belonged to him but, Eric was right about there being two Sookies. Every day she grew closer to the fae in her, the force of power and light—it craved Eric, it sang his name with every breath. And yet, Bill. The girl Sookie still was, the waitress at Merlotte's—she still clung to Bill with the tightest grip. She couldn't argue. She couldn't enter the exhausting battle between the two, between the scattered parts of herself. All she could do was nod and hope they didn't run into Bill until she could figure out what she was going to do about loving the two of them. Eric was right. There was no escaping their love, no suffocating the flames of their passion; it was there, burning bright and all consuming—it belonged to her. She would not ignore it again. Not when the time she had with loved ones was so brief.
Eric helped her to her feet and they dressed each other like curious children. Eric closed her car door as she slid onto the cool black leather of his BMW. She opened up her cell phone and saw the missed calls from Lafayette, Jason as well as Andy Bellefleur. Eric revved the engine and the two of them zoomed into the night. Sookie held his hand as it rested on the gear shift. He kissed it often.
Protectus,Gran.Keephimsafe.KeepTarasafe. Sookie whispered to the black night. She sunk into her chair and watched Shreveport disappear out her window. She dialed her voicemail.