A/N: I wrote this story about 5 years ago and reading it now is about the equivalent to taking a tomahawk to my skull. (It's so bad oh my gosh I'm so sorry!) So I've decided to rewrite it. Less song, more words. It was 5 years ago when I wrote the original and I want to say that I've improved, but I'll let you be the judge of that (only if you've read the original). You don't have to have read the original to read this. It's probably better that you don't. It was 30% song, 50% bad ideas, and 30% bad math. This is really more of it's own story, and can't really considered to be a rewrite, to be honest, but it is.
I also want to mention that I'm not too fond of the Edward/Bella pairing anymore and I write all of my stories with an original character now (which is probably why I haven't gone back to writing From Dusk Till Dawn). I'm not overly fond of Bella and Edward separately either, so I will try my damned hardest not to throw them off a cliff. I'm not 12 anymore, guys. Just saiyan.
Read on, my pretties.
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of the characters in Twilight. Any character in this not recognized from the work is created by me, but there's only one so don't stress yourself too much tryna figure out who is and who isn't. Trust me, you'll know.
"Come for a walk with me,"
You'd think, after seventy years, these horrid visuals would stop.
"Bella, we're leaving."
Vampires can't sleep, but they're the closest thing to nightmares that can ever play in my mind.
"I'm no good for you, Bella."
Over and over again, replaying the same scene in my head like a broken record.
"My world is not for you,"
But they're not nightmares. No. With nightmares there is reassurance that once you wake up, the nightmare is over. It's gone. It's "not real."
"Bella, I don't want you to come with me."
These are memories. Painful memories. The kind of memories that make you question your own sanity if you had a choice in doing whatever led up to making such memories. And I did have a choice.
I've had not but an inkling of an idea of whether the one I left behind was safe because of my sudden departure. Many times my sleepless nightmares have driven me to the point of almost running back to her, or begging my sister for a look at her future. But then I remember why I did it, and where I am now.
Though the memories still plague me and my undermining guilt continues to eat at my mind, I've found someone who can help: Juliet.
What we have is not normal love. She is not my sister, but my best friend. She is annoying and snarky and likes to listen to songs I can't stand on repeat so they get stuck in her head and I have to hear them over and over again. However, she is also compassionate and sensitive. "It's because I'm a Pisces," she says.
She sits with me for hours listening to my stories about the one I left behind, even if I've told them before. She never complains. Sometimes we just sit in silence. Sometimes she tells me of her past life and I realize that our lives really aren't that much different.
One day I just looked at her and had a crazy thought.
She's been with our family for nine years - found a scared newborn on one of our hunting trips in Canada - but she's made such a difference in our lives. She's like a different piece to same puzzle. A piece we've been missing.
I love her, that much I am aware, but I'm not in love with her. That means nothing, though. So I got down on one knee and proposed.
Her "Yes" came as just as much of a shock as my proposal. It was only after that both of us realized, I should probably get a ring.
Being vampires, we could put our wedding off for ten years or even one hundred years and we would stay unchanged. Alice, though, adamantly insisted we get married within the year. We could trust that her mind was set and she could not be swayed.
A year later found our clan and multiple others that we had acquainted ourselves with in an old cathedral. Juliet's father was a catholic deacon, so having the wedding here was what she finds to be the only connection she has left to her family on her wedding. I don't mind.
I see myself in the minds of others standing up at the altar with my hair being the only thing out of place. Untameable, as always.
Many times I've imagined being in the same position with a different girl. Dressed to the nines surrounded by family and friends and everyone I care about. Hearing the organ play and seeing her walk down the aisle looking so beautiful that she may as well have been sent from heaven. Saying our vows.
"I, Edward Cullen, take you, Juliet Mackay, to be my wife. I promise to be true to you in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health. I will love and honor you all the days of my life."
"I, Juliet Mackay, take you, Edward Cullen, to be my husband. I promise to be true to you in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health. I will love and honor you all the days of my life."
"By the power vested in me, by the state of Pennsylvania, I now pronounce you husband and wife."
I was pulled away by Alice during the reception. She led me over to an elderly woman sitting at a table with Esme and Carlisle. I couldn't read her mind, though that wasn't the first thing that triggered my memory. It was her eyes.
"Don't do anything reckless or stupid,"
Though her body was aged, her hair was silver, and you could smell the cancer in her blood, her eyes were still the chocolatey brown that I remember from that first day in Biology class, if not a little wiser with more wrinkles around the edges.
"I promise that this will be the last time you'll ever see me."
I knelt down in front of her and took her thin, fragile hands into my own. I noticed a fairly old wedding band on her ring finger. Her eyes met mine and she gave a small, weak smile.
"Time heals all wounds for your kind."
A week later was Bella's funeral. She'd passed away in her sleep after a long battle with cancer.
"Goodbye, Bella."