Title:
GIVE BACK OUR MEN!
Rating:
PG-13 [Bad language, sexual scenes, small lime, but no lemon]
Disclaimer:
The game, "Dead or Alive", does not belong to me or my cousin. We both do not own any of the characters that we are about to use.
Author Notes:
Before we begin, here's a brief, but longer, summery: The DOA girls drag the men on a cruise trip knowing it'll be fun; that is, until everything goes wrong and the men go missing. The girls soon discover that they have landed on an island filled with beautiful women and do not want to leave. Now, the only way to get their men back is to seduce them. What'll be the outcome of this crisis?
Now that's over, just to let you know this is a fic my cousin and I wrote together [well actually, she wrote, I think up the chapters]. We both hope you guys enjoy the story! I'm kind of leaning towards a humor/romance fic so we'll see.
Warning:
Extreme OOC in almost all chapters. Please forgive us if we seem to have ruined your favorite characters, but it's how we create a humorous atmosphere. If it offends you, there's a back button on top of your toolbar that'll return you to fanfiction.net's Dead Or Alive section n.
Chapter One:
Shopping Madness
The tournaments was finally over and now each of the DOA contestants where allowed to live their life the way they wanted. The girls of course chose to spend their life at the mall, shopping...
"OH MY GOD!! LOOK AT THIS BIKINI!!!" Tina screeched as she held out red and white bikini in front of her six companions.
The others gawked at it as they feel in love with the bathing suit.
"It's so perfect! It's perfect for my beautiful body!" Kasumi commented as she held out a victory sign and held a childish grin. She then began to reach for it when Tina slapped her hand away.
"Hey, I found it first!" the blonde exclaimed as Kasumi and her glared daggers at each other.
"There's more than one! Go get another one that'll actually fit your oversized weight!"
One of Tina's eyes began to twitch as the two girls still glared at each other. "There's no more! And just because I have bigger breast than you doesn't mean you can take my bikini!"
"Why you-!" Kasumi growled, dropping all her shopping bags and getting into a fighting position. Tina did the same, dropping her bags but still holding the bikini firmly in her hands, and stood in a fighting stance.
The other five girls, Helena, Hitomi, Christie, Leifang, and Ayane, were just at the side, watching the two.
"Here we go again…" Helena said in an exasperated tone, smacking her forehead.
Hitomi only had a wide grin on her face. "I just love fights! Go Tina!! Kick some Kasumi butt!"
Leifang heard this and glared at the youngest girl. "What the hell are you talking about?! Kasumi will kick Tina's ass!"
"In your dreams!" Hitomi yelled back.
Soon, the two youngest girls of the group glared daggers at each other while Tina and Kasumi began to proceed to their fight.
"Bitch!" Kasumi screamed while the two began to go on an all out… catfight? Tina had scratched Kasumi's skin in the middle of this outrageous battle.
"Whore!!" Tina shot back as Kasumi let out a gasp of annoyance and began to catfight harder.
Helena and Ayane blushed as everyone in a ten foot radius watched the two girls bitch-slap each other and the other two youngest girls glaring, which caused lighting to appear outside of the mall in the middle of a bright sunny day.
"Sister..." Ayane complained as she covered her face with her shopping bag as everyone stared dumbfounded at the battle.
"Damn, this is so embarrassing." Helena blushed when she noticed a lot of the people were cute men.
"I really don't mind it at all. I always do enjoy seeing blood! MWUHAHAHAHAHA!!!!" Christie laughed evilly, making a shiver go up the crowd's spin.
When Ayane and Helena heard this, they turned to the white haired fighter and saw she was wearing her sunglasses, hiding her eyes so no one could see her identity. She looked at them and smirked.
"Never leave without sunglasses ladies. It appears you two are too dumb to know that though."
"HOW DARE YOU CALL US DUMB!" Helena and Ayane said at the same time, making Christie shrink back at their scary horrid faces.
Oh god, they look so ugly when they're mad. Hey, is that a wrinkle on Helena's face??!! Christie thought to herself as she backed away.
But she began to burst into laughter at the thought of just telling Helena this. Helena would sure have kicked her to the moon if she ever told her that.
While Kasumi and Tina where still fighting, they didn't noticed that Tina had dropped the bikini. Unknown to them, a small girl saw it and ran under the two girls to pick it up.
"Die you mean, mean woman!!!" Kasumi screamed as Tina yelled, "You first you horrid, horrid lady!!"
But they stopped short when they heard a giggle below them. Looking down, they saw a black haired small girl, at the age of 8, holding the bikini.
"OOOO, me like!! Me like a lot!! Yay, yay!!" The small girl cheered as she ran away into the crowd to look for her mommy. "Mommy, I found my bathing suit!"
Silence fell between all seven girls, except for the sound of crickets, as their eyes became wide and their mouth hung wide open, enough for a swarm of flies to come in.
"... Wow..." Helena commented again, speaking for all of them.
When the crowd began to disappear and Helena, Christie, Ayane, Hitomi, and Leifang were back to their normal status, Tina and Kasumi were still speechless.
"How..." Tina began
"Could..." Kasumi added
"She!?!?!?!?!" The two finished at the same time as their eye began to fill with water and their upper lips twitch. But moments after, the two girls let it all out, hugging each other as a huge stream of tears fell out of each eye.
"Anyone bring an umbrella?" Leifang asked as the four let out a loud sigh and sweat dropped.
But the five lost interest at the two sobbing fighters when they heard a loud voice come from the store nearby.
"Come one and all and see if you have the strength! If you have the guts! If you just have the god damn muscles to win a cruise trip! Today is your lucky day, folks! Step right up and try this test! If any seven get the highest scores, wins two tickets!"
This caught everyone's attention, especially the seven girls. Tina and Kasumi quickly stopped crying as if they never even shed a tear; their eyes were instead filled with stars.
"Did you hear that?! A trip to on a cruise!" Hitomi gasped with excitement as the seven ran towards the contest.
"For sure I'll win!" Christie snorted as she pushed her way to the crowd, pushing a big, tall, muscled man at the process.
He gained his footing and glared at the white haired assassin. "Yo babe! Watch what you're doing!"
Christie stopped dead on her tracks while Helena, Kasumi, Tina, Leifang, Ayane, and Hitomi froze, their eyes popping out as they begin to sweat hard.
"Don't call me babe," Christie growled in a dangerous voice, her back still turned to the overgrown man.
"What cha gonna do about it, babe? Babe, babe, babe, babe!" He teased as Christie's hand turned into a fist.
"DAMN YOU!!!" She said, turning around and charging at the man. She was about to do a high side-kick in the face but accidentally tripped on her own two feet, making her feet land on his most private spot, hard.
"OH FUCK!" he grimaced as his face was held with shock. "MOMMY!!!" he screamed as he ran away, still holding his privates that had been stripped from his pride.
The six girls and the rest of the crowd again went wide eyes as Christie straitened herself out, glade that no one noticed that she in truth, didn't mean to hit him there.
"cough that'll show him," she said trying not to look at the girls. She was sure they would tease her about it till she died if they ever found out she actually tripped! "Now, let's go."
"Come up folks! The highest so far is 139!" the announcer declared as a man walked away from a punching bag. "All you have to do is punch the bag as hard as you can!"
Leifang snorted at the broadcast of the highest score so far. "Weaklings! A dog could to better than that! And with his tail too!!"
At the moment, a man had already stepped away from the punching bag, reaching 142. The next guy in line, and everyone else, heard the loud comment from the girl as they looked at her mockingly
"And you girls can do better?" One of them asked, soon braking into laughter at the sight of the only girls in line.
A smirk appeared on the determined face of Ayane. "Of course."
"Then be our guest runt." One commented as they again fell into laughter.
"Hey Christie, mind doing another operation kick-men-in-the-balls?" whispered Tina to Christie as she almost chocked at the request.
Leifang stood out of the line and rolled up her invisible sleeves, she was wearing a tank top which did not contain any long sleeves. "Let me try! I can't stand watching you rookies waste your time!"
Some of the men growled a the comment, holding back the urge to tackle and throw the girl into a nearby wastebasket. Some of them only laughed scornfully while others glared dangerously at the seven women.
"Why not, have the little lady try. After all, ladies first." One of men said, moving away from the punching bag. He had a scornful grin on his face as Leifang walked right up.
Everyone became quiet, interested to see what this girl had to offer after bragging so much. Leifang closed her eyes and, with one quick movement, turned her hand into a fist, made the wrist upright, and laid a hard punch on the bag, almost denting it.
Everyone gasped at the score, speechless. The machine reached up to 281.
"Oh, you go girl! You so go!" Kasumi and Ayane cheered, doing a cheerleading dance while using their shopping bags as pompoms.
Helena only jeered at the score. "Loser! I can so get higher than that anytime!!"
Leifang's right eyebrow began to twitch as she turned around and glared at Helena. Pointing an accusing finger at her, she shot back, "I'd like to see you try!!!!!"
Helena smirked while skipping up to the punching bag like a little girl. She pushed Leifang out of the way and flipped her long hair off her shoulders, making it smack Leifang's cheeks.
"Now watch closely Leifang. I can get a much higher score than you. Oh, and look at this! I can do it with my eyes open." She teased.
Quickly, Helena moved her right foot behind her and her right arm to her right hips. In one swift motion, she punched the bag, making it reach 307.
Leifang look fiercely at Helena, fighting the urge to just punch her into the punching bag. The crowd went speechless again. No one, much less a woman, had ever even been able to even go over 200.
"Wow, will you look at that! The two ladies are now in the lead! 307, and 281!"
Tina stood up taller. "You're forgetting me! It's time I take the spotlight from you, HAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHA!!! chocks"
Hitomi sighed. "I told you not to eat my home made cookies before laughing evilly."
"OH MY GOD!! LOOK AT THIS BIKINI!!!" Tina screeched as she held out red and white bikini in front of her six companions.
The others gawked at it as they feel in love with the bathing suit.
"It's so perfect! It's perfect for my beautiful body!" Kasumi commented as she held out a victory sign and held a childish grin. She then began to reach for it when Tina slapped her hand away.
"Hey, I found it first!" the blonde exclaimed as Kasumi and her glared daggers at each other.
"There's more than one! Go get another one that'll actually fit your oversized weight!"
One of Tina's eyes began to twitch as the two girls still glared at each other. "There's no more! And just because I have bigger breast than you doesn't mean you can take my bikini!"
"Why you-!" Kasumi growled, dropping all her shopping bags and getting into a fighting position. Tina did the same, dropping her bags but still holding the bikini firmly in her hands, and stood in a fighting stance.
The other five girls, Helena, Hitomi, Christie, Leifang, and Ayane, were just at the side, watching the two.
"Here we go again…" Helena said in an exasperated tone, smacking her forehead.
Hitomi only had a wide grin on her face. "I just love fights! Go Tina!! Kick some Kasumi butt!"
Leifang heard this and glared at the youngest girl. "What the hell are you talking about?! Kasumi will kick Tina's ass!"
"In your dreams!" Hitomi yelled back.
Soon, the two youngest girls of the group glared daggers at each other while Tina and Kasumi began to proceed to their fight.
"Bitch!" Kasumi screamed while the two began to go on an all out… catfight? Tina had scratched Kasumi's skin in the middle of this outrageous battle.
"Whore!!" Tina shot back as Kasumi let out a gasp of annoyance and began to catfight harder.
Helena and Ayane blushed as everyone in a ten foot radius watched the two girls bitch-slap each other and the other two youngest girls glaring, which caused lighting to appear outside of the mall in the middle of a bright sunny day.
"Sister..." Ayane complained as she covered her face with her shopping bag as everyone stared dumbfounded at the battle.
"Damn, this is so embarrassing." Helena blushed when she noticed a lot of the people were cute men.
"I really don't mind it at all. I always do enjoy seeing blood! MWUHAHAHAHAHA!!!!" Christie laughed evilly, making a shiver go up the crowd's spin.
When Ayane and Helena heard this, they turned to the white haired fighter and saw she was wearing her sunglasses, hiding her eyes so no one could see her identity. She looked at them and smirked.
"Never leave without sunglasses ladies. It appears you two are too dumb to know that though."
"HOW DARE YOU CALL US DUMB!" Helena and Ayane said at the same time, making Christie shrink back at their scary horrid faces.
Oh god, they look so ugly when they're mad. Hey, is that a wrinkle on Helena's face??!! Christie thought to herself as she backed away.
But she began to burst into laughter at the thought of just telling Helena this. Helena would sure have kicked her to the moon if she ever told her that.
While Kasumi and Tina where still fighting, they didn't noticed that Tina had dropped the bikini. Unknown to them, a small girl saw it and ran under the two girls to pick it up.
"Die you mean, mean woman!!!" Kasumi screamed as Tina yelled, "You first you horrid, horrid lady!!"
But they stopped short when they heard a giggle below them. Looking down, they saw a black haired small girl, at the age of 8, holding the bikini.
"OOOO, me like!! Me like a lot!! Yay, yay!!" The small girl cheered as she ran away into the crowd to look for her mommy. "Mommy, I found my bathing suit!"
Silence fell between all seven girls, except for the sound of crickets, as their eyes became wide and their mouth hung wide open, enough for a swarm of flies to come in.
"... Wow..." Helena commented again, speaking for all of them.
When the crowd began to disappear and Helena, Christie, Ayane, Hitomi, and Leifang were back to their normal status, Tina and Kasumi were still speechless.
"How..." Tina began
"Could..." Kasumi added
"She!?!?!?!?!" The two finished at the same time as their eye began to fill with water and their upper lips twitch. But moments after, the two girls let it all out, hugging each other as a huge stream of tears fell out of each eye.
"Anyone bring an umbrella?" Leifang asked as the four let out a loud sigh and sweat dropped.
But the five lost interest at the two sobbing fighters when they heard a loud voice come from the store nearby.
"Come one and all and see if you have the strength! If you have the guts! If you just have the god damn muscles to win a cruise trip! Today is your lucky day, folks! Step right up and try this test! If any seven get the highest scores, wins two tickets!"
This caught everyone's attention, especially the seven girls. Tina and Kasumi quickly stopped crying as if they never even shed a tear; their eyes were instead filled with stars.
"Did you hear that?! A trip to on a cruise!" Hitomi gasped with excitement as the seven ran towards the contest.
"For sure I'll win!" Christie snorted as she pushed her way to the crowd, pushing a big, tall, muscled man at the process.
He gained his footing and glared at the white haired assassin. "Yo babe! Watch what you're doing!"
Christie stopped dead on her tracks while Helena, Kasumi, Tina, Leifang, Ayane, and Hitomi froze, their eyes popping out as they begin to sweat hard.
"Don't call me babe," Christie growled in a dangerous voice, her back still turned to the overgrown man.
"What cha gonna do about it, babe? Babe, babe, babe, babe!" He teased as Christie's hand turned into a fist.
"DAMN YOU!!!" She said, turning around and charging at the man. She was about to do a high side-kick in the face but accidentally tripped on her own two feet, making her feet land on his most private spot, hard.
"OH FUCK!" he grimaced as his face was held with shock. "MOMMY!!!" he screamed as he ran away, still holding his privates that had been stripped from his pride.
The six girls and the rest of the crowd again went wide eyes as Christie straitened herself out, glade that no one noticed that she in truth, didn't mean to hit him there.
"cough that'll show him," she said trying not to look at the girls. She was sure they would tease her about it till she died if they ever found out she actually tripped! "Now, let's go."
"Come up folks! The highest so far is 139!" the announcer declared as a man walked away from a punching bag. "All you have to do is punch the bag as hard as you can!"
Leifang snorted at the broadcast of the highest score so far. "Weaklings! A dog could to better than that! And with his tail too!!"
At the moment, a man had already stepped away from the punching bag, reaching 142. The next guy in line, and everyone else, heard the loud comment from the girl as they looked at her mockingly
"And you girls can do better?" One of them asked, soon braking into laughter at the sight of the only girls in line.
A smirk appeared on the determined face of Ayane. "Of course."
"Then be our guest runt." One commented as they again fell into laughter.
"Hey Christie, mind doing another operation kick-men-in-the-balls?" whispered Tina to Christie as she almost chocked at the request.
Leifang stood out of the line and rolled up her invisible sleeves, she was wearing a tank top which did not contain any long sleeves. "Let me try! I can't stand watching you rookies waste your time!"
Some of the men growled a the comment, holding back the urge to tackle and throw the girl into a nearby wastebasket. Some of them only laughed scornfully while others glared dangerously at the seven women.
"Why not, have the little lady try. After all, ladies first." One of men said, moving away from the punching bag. He had a scornful grin on his face as Leifang walked right up.
Everyone became quiet, interested to see what this girl had to offer after bragging so much. Leifang closed her eyes and, with one quick movement, turned her hand into a fist, made the wrist upright, and laid a hard punch on the bag, almost denting it.
Everyone gasped at the score, speechless. The machine reached up to 281.
"Oh, you go girl! You so go!" Kasumi and Ayane cheered, doing a cheerleading dance while using their shopping bags as pompoms.
Helena only jeered at the score. "Loser! I can so get higher than that anytime!!"
Leifang's right eyebrow began to twitch as she turned around and glared at Helena. Pointing an accusing finger at her, she shot back, "I'd like to see you try!!!!!"
Helena smirked while skipping up to the punching bag like a little girl. She pushed Leifang out of the way and flipped her long hair off her shoulders, making it smack Leifang's cheeks.
"Now watch closely Leifang. I can get a much higher score than you. Oh, and look at this! I can do it with my eyes open." She teased.
Quickly, Helena moved her right foot behind her and her right arm to her right hips. In one swift motion, she punched the bag, making it reach 307.
Leifang look fiercely at Helena, fighting the urge to just punch her into the punching bag. The crowd went speechless again. No one, much less a woman, had ever even been able to even go over 200.
"Wow, will you look at that! The two ladies are now in the lead! 307, and 281!"
Tina stood up taller. "You're forgetting me! It's time I take the spotlight from you, HAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHA!!! chocks"
Hitomi sighed. "I told you not to eat my home made cookies before laughing evilly."
"And so we have the winners!
Helena: 307
Leifang: 298
Tina: 300
Christie: 313
Hitomi: 297
Ayane: 303
Kasumi: 314
And, last but not least, the man who goes by the name as Bass, has 340!"
"WHAT!!!??!?!??!?!!?!??!?!?!" All seven girls cried out at the same time when hearing the seventh winner.
Tina was speechless as ever. "Daddy?? My sugar muffin is here?" She looked up at the stage to see her one and only sugar muffin or also known as Bass with the announcer holding up two tickets to her.
"Apple Sauce! Look at what I got!" Bass called out to his daughter as Tina smiled, stars in her eyes.
"Leave it to my daddy!" She cheered as the other girls listened in shocked.
"Sugar muffin?" Hitomi asked.
"Apple sauce?" Leifang asked.
Tina stopped and looked at the two girls from the corner of her eyes. The two girls then exploded into laughter, tears falling from their eyes.
Christie, Helena, Ayane, and Kasumi began to snicker as well until they saw Bass coming towards them, smoke coming out of his ears. Unfortunately though, neither Hitomi nor Leifang noticed him coming, slamming his fist into his open palm.
When the two youngest girls were on the floor, rolling and laughing their heads off, Bass came up to them. "It's time you learn your manners! It looks to me it's time I give you operation A."
Tina gasped at this as she grabbed her father's arm. "Oh daddy, you mustn't!"
Hitomi and Leifang had already stopped and were now gulping as Bass looked at them with evil glimmering in his eyes. "Oh yes I must, apple sauce, I must. BWHEHEHEEHEHE!!!"
Helena: 307
Leifang: 298
Tina: 300
Christie: 313
Hitomi: 297
Ayane: 303
Kasumi: 314
And, last but not least, the man who goes by the name as Bass, has 340!"
"WHAT!!!??!?!??!?!!?!??!?!?!" All seven girls cried out at the same time when hearing the seventh winner.
Tina was speechless as ever. "Daddy?? My sugar muffin is here?" She looked up at the stage to see her one and only sugar muffin or also known as Bass with the announcer holding up two tickets to her.
"Apple Sauce! Look at what I got!" Bass called out to his daughter as Tina smiled, stars in her eyes.
"Leave it to my daddy!" She cheered as the other girls listened in shocked.
"Sugar muffin?" Hitomi asked.
"Apple sauce?" Leifang asked.
Tina stopped and looked at the two girls from the corner of her eyes. The two girls then exploded into laughter, tears falling from their eyes.
Christie, Helena, Ayane, and Kasumi began to snicker as well until they saw Bass coming towards them, smoke coming out of his ears. Unfortunately though, neither Hitomi nor Leifang noticed him coming, slamming his fist into his open palm.
When the two youngest girls were on the floor, rolling and laughing their heads off, Bass came up to them. "It's time you learn your manners! It looks to me it's time I give you operation A."
Tina gasped at this as she grabbed her father's arm. "Oh daddy, you mustn't!"
Hitomi and Leifang had already stopped and were now gulping as Bass looked at them with evil glimmering in his eyes. "Oh yes I must, apple sauce, I must. BWHEHEHEEHEHE!!!"
"WAAA!!! THAT HURTS!!!" Leifang cried.
"WHERE'S MY DADDY WHEN I NEED HIM?!!! -Oh wait, he's in Germany." Hitomi answered herself.
Bass was laughing evilly as the two girls screamed their lungs out. They were each on one of his knees, their ass facing him. The tall older man had already licked his hand and slapped each of their butt-cheeks more than once. And he still hadn't stopped after reaching 2000 for each butt-cheek.
"GO DADDY!!" Tina cheered. She was now doing a cheerleading dance with Kasumi.
"OH!! THAT'S GOING TO LEAVE A MARK!!!!" Leifang complained.
"I wish I had beans and rice for lunch, or at least a bean burrito!!! That why I could have used my stink bomb on him!" Hitomi screamed right when Bass slapped her right butt-cheek, which she was sure was red as a cherry.
Helena, Christie, and Ayane turned away from the scene.
"Remind me to never make fun of Bass and Tina again," Helena whispered.
The other two girls nodded in agreement but winced when they heard Leifang and Hitomi cry out at the same time with the sound of slapping as well.
"So anyways... who are we going to take on the cruise with us?" Ayane asked.
"I don't know..." Christie trailed off until she laughed. "At first I was thinking of bring that jerk, Bayman, with me."
Helena smirked at this. "Why not? I think it'll be fun if we invite the guys to come with us. We can give them pure torture!"
The three girls then grinned evilly.
"Why not?!? BWHAHAHAHAHA!!!"
Author Notes:
I hope you enjoyed it. I know it's not that funny but I try. Review and leave any comments please. My cousin and I would like to know what you think of it!
The next chapter is when the women ask the men to come along. I have some funny ideas for that so... hope to see you there too.
Dark Samarian as spoken.