AN: I highly recommend either listening to Mercy by One Republic or at least reading the lyrics, as that is where the flow of this POV comes from.
Damon's POV:
I had fallen for Katherine. I had fallen, and hard. Only to find her not in the tomb I had believed her to be starving in for 145 years. I knew, in some aspect of my mind that Stefan and Elena were nearby, that Bonnie and her grandmother were too, and yet, I couldn't see them. My mind was back in 1864, trying to remember any indication of her plans for escape, of any clue she had left me, to indicate that she wasn't in the tomb, like I had believed her to be. But, more than that, the slowly dawning realisation that after 145 years of pining, my love had been worth nothing to her – that I had been worth nothing to her, was the most difficult to bear.
And then I felt arms embracing me. At first, I didn't know who it was or even why, but they provided a semblance of comfort, and while I was shocked, I was grateful for it. I think I needed it, but when I looked down slightly, and found it was Elena hugging me, Elena offering me comfort, I was shocked. I didn't understand why she would, especially considering I hadn't been the nicest of people to her. Hell, I had just threatened to kill her and thus turn her into a vampire, after forcibly feeding her my blood, and here she was offering me comfort. But despite how I wondered at her ability to find it in herself to comfort me, I desperately felt the lack of warmth her body had provided when she pulled away.
Later, when I was drinking into oblivion – or, attempting to do so, – I could think a little without feeling the pain as much as while I was sober. I could see the signs I had previously denied, what Stefan had told me so many times over, the compulsions I hadn't wanted to believe in – they were there, and no amount of denial was going to change that – but I hated being wrong. My need to be loved, after the neglect of my father, after having seen my brother be brought up as if he were Guiseppe's only son, the only one worth any recognition, after the death of my mother, lead me to Katherine. Katherine had given me an opportunity to not only get away from all of that, but had also given me what I had needed above all else, to be loved, and allowed me to love her as I so desperately needed to. And yet, I could see, through blurred eyes, with an alcohol-induced daze, that not only had I been wrong, but I had been oblivious to what was right in front of my eyes – that Katherine had been playing with both of us, that she hadn't genuinely loved me, that our love story was fated to be a disaster from the start – a human and a vampire, a man desperate for love, and a woman with the confidence that she could and would break any and all rules to get what she wanted, and what she wanted alone. She would play, have her fun, and leave, without any thought to anyone except herself. I had always been aware of her selfishness, as I had told Elena, but I had also been willing to overlook it, wanting to accept her just as readily as I wanted to be accepted myself.
And then, in the midst of trying to get Katherine out of the tomb, I had run across Elena. The exact carbon copy – doppelganger – of Katherine. At first, I considered her to be a pale imitation of the true beauty, but as time wore on, and more of Elena's personality was revealed, I found myself comparing the small things. How when Katherine had spoken, she had done so in a condescending, confident tone, whereas Elena, while firm, was much more compassionate just in the way she spoke to and of others.
After Katherine's betrayal, I felt as if my sole purpose in life had ended, and whilst looking for Katherine had occurred to me, I knew that she had 145 years to look for me and she hadn't, and I knew I probably wouldn't like what I would come across should I run into her. And yet, Elena's presence alone started being enough of a reason to remain in Mystic Falls, this cursed town. Her friendship, despite the numerous things I did to disrupt it, remained, while fragile at times, and she managed to give me a reason not to leave. To stay. To help protect her. And I knew she was my brother's girl. But I was too hung over Katherine to seriously even realise I might be falling for Elena. She had helped me through the worst of it, shown me even when all hope seems lost, she would be there, whether to comfort me with her presence of her hugs, that there was a light at the end of the god forsaken tunnel.
And I started falling for her. Unintentionally. And yet, when Isobel stated it, I couldn't even consider denying it, because just as I had started believing it to be true, she aired it for the world to hear. But that didn't change how I felt. And I also knew, that what I felt for Elena was more intense than what it was for Katherine. What I still felt for Katherine. It was real, and for that alone I was willing to try even more than I had ever done so for Katherine. I would help protect her, do my utmost to keep her safe and happy, and wish with all my might that it would be enough for her to return my love, though I doubted it – hadn't history proved that? And yet, even while knowing that, I still couldn't let the hope go, because every time I saw Elena, I would have my little epiphany all over again – that Elena was worth the fight, that she was worth the effort to live another day, to survive and fight against all hope.