The Small Print

By The-Muse-In-Me

Roy Mustang looked up from his mountainous paper work. 'Come in' he said dully in answer to the rapid knocking that said all to clearly 'I have better things to do today, so lets make this quick'. The door banged open to reveal a slightly pissed off looking Edward Elric. Ed marched forward and placed his hands on the edge of Roy's desk, leaning forward.

'What the fuck do you want Mustang?'

'Well,' he said in a calm tone that only proceeded to piss off the chibi even more 'I have an assignment for you'

'And that would be….?' Ed said through the clenched teeth

Roy leaned back in his chair

'Shut the door and sit down. This is going to sound a bit ludicrous'

Ed complied, too curious to complain. Roy would usually have as many people as possible witness him pissed off while he sat back with his usual infuriating smirk.

He took the chair offered to him and looked questioningly at the colonel.

'OK, here goes…Edward…we need you to go back in time…'

He closed his eyes and tilted his head downwards in order to prepare himself for the explosion. It was actually a shame that he looked downwards because he missed the completely dumb fucked look that materialized Edo's face. Yes. Currently Edward Elric was staring at Roy Mustang's (AN: Unbelievably Sexy XD) hair with a face that a fish would be jealous of, even his mouth was opening and closing aimlessly.

'I…But…How…Why…Really…?Me...?Shit' Ed stuttered pointlessly.

Roy chanced a glance upwards and had to look straight back down to compose himself thanks to the look on Ed's face. After several deeps breaths an undeniably strong will he looked up again. Ed still looked the same and still was throwing out random words like 'what', 'shit' and 'fuck' but at least he was prepared for it.

'Right,' Ed's attention snapped back onto Roy's face 'I'll start over. Ed, the military needs you to go back in time about fifteen years. The military has gathered information that says the homunculus are planning things that are unclear. The only fact we know for certain are the place and time zone.'

He paused to make sure that Ed was registering everything he was saying.

'O…Kaaaay…?' Ed mused.

'You will be required' he continued 'to travel into the past to find out what the homunculus want. The reason you have been chosen is because the location is situated very close to a High School.' Roy felt his face heat up as he thought about what he was going to say next, expecting the worst.

'You will be required to attend the school…as a 9th year student' (1)

Ed's faced controlled with anger as he added two and two finally understanding why Roy had looked uncomfortable saying it.

'WHO ARE YOU CALLING SO SMALL THAT EVEN MICROSCOPIC ANTS FEEL THE NEED TO USE A MAGNIFYING GLASS TO SEE THEM!?'

The colonel cracked open an eye to see if the chibi was done yet.

'Ok,' he continued tentatively 'as I was saying, you will have to attend this school in order to help the military. Those are the basic details. If you still feel the need to find out more about, you have assess to the official documents and do make sure you read the small print.'

He paused to indicate the pile of paperwork he had been completing earlier.

'I am going to tell you about your school now so listen carefully because I don't really want to have to repeat this.'

'The school is called Fisher More High School' (2)

He paused as a dark flicker passed his eyes drawing a feeling of concern from Ed for the colonel. He had to admit it was a new feeling. He took his time to identify the feeling and the man seated in front of him, wondering what could be so bad for it to unsettle the colonel. It had to be something. Not much got past Roy's face whatever it was. Hell, happiness barely showed.

The look passed and soon Roy was talking again forcing Ed to abandon his thoughts to listen; if he said he wasn't going to repeat it he meant he wasn't going to repeat it.

'-isher More is a popular choice for teenagers wanting to enter the military. I can name numerous people whom you are on close terms with that attended Fisher More. Hughes being one, although Elysia doesn't exist so you'll be in for a break.'

He grinned. It was quite a turn-around seeing as less than a minute ago he looked as if he was reliving a past nightmare but Ed knew for a fact that he was still thinking about it from the almost-entirely-hidden look in his eye.

'The routine is pretty basic; the same as any other high school

'I'm not going to tell you any more about the school; its best if you have no choice but to act like an exchange student and its not easy to try and un-teach your self things. Believe me, I've tried. Although just so you know the school motto is: Muse, Converse, Trivium. (3)'

He grinned again.

Ed smiled back weakly.

''Wow, it must be something really bad if Mustang's willing to make jokes with me! Shit, that scares me! And I thought nothing scared me!''

He wasn't showing it but he really was concerned. Despite all the shit Roy made him go through he still managed to feel concerned. However much he tried to hide it he did like the colonel. Roy had made it possible for him to become a state alchemist. He would honestly repay him one day. But for now they could just be mortal enemies. It suited the both fine.

'Anyway, I don't have anything else to tell you so unless you have any questions of your own, you're dismissed'

Ed stood up and, with a short mock bow, walked towards the door.

'Oh and Ed…'

'Yes colonel bastard?'

'You leave tomorrow'

'WHAT!? A WARNING WOULD HAVE BEEN NICE!'

'What have just spent the last' he checked his watch '20 minutes of my free time doing?'

It looked as if Ed was having a spazz attack; all the muscles in his face were twitching.

He continued to the door, making as much noise as possible all the while mumbling under his breath incoherent thing like 'Fucking bastard', 'Retarded cock' and 'Just breathe, you'll be OK'

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When Ed stormed into the dorm he shared with his brother, pissed off as hell, he barely registered the packages on the sofa, with labels such as 'uniform' and 'books', before he grabbed a towel and took a shower 45 minutes longer than necessary.

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AN: (1)For any American readers out there who may have no idea what 9th year is you have to be 13/14 years old to be in year 9 and in my Fan-Fic Ed Is 18 which means he SHOULD be in college. I really don't want to get into it too deep; anyway its not like I know what year you go into 1st grade in.

Hmm if someone could actually give me a head's up about that I'd love it XD Thanks!

(2)Fisher More is MY Highschool

(3)I spent 2 hours making this motto and I love it! To explain it

Muse are THE BEST band in the WORLD (AND THEIR BRITISH XD) I am also going to see them in concert on 11/11/06 XD. The reason I chose it is because muse means think.

Converse are THE BEST trainers in THE WORLD! Its one of the many things that I love about America XD. I chose Converse because Converse means talk

Trivium are the SECOND greatest band in the world (and are American) I am going to see them on the 14th of December (XD) where they will be Iron Maiden's special guests! I chose Trivium because the band Trivium shout like hell XD

So to sum up (wow I sound like a retard) the motto means: Think, Talk, Then Shout Like Hell because to be honest that is the exact thing that happens in my class! Ask the other 28 members of it!

And, finally, PLEASE review! This is my first Fic and my friend told me that it feels really good when you read people's reviews so…yeah…that's it…REVIEW! XD