Songfic #1 for the Hideaway, I swear this is the last contest entry from me this month! The lyrics belong to James Morrison and are from the song, "The Pieces Don't Fit Anymore."
I dedicate this to Wicked who accidentally gave me the idea to use Remus as the main character in this songfic. Thanks hun!
I hope you like it, it is rather angsty which I like. Reviews are welcome.
Disclaimer: The lyrics belong to James Morrison and the characters belong to JKR.
I've been twisting and turning in a space that's too small
I've been drawing the line and watching it fall
You've been closing me in, closing the space in my heart
Watching us fading and watching us fall apart
Remus had tried his best to fall in love with Tonks, to make himself feel something more. But he had finally given that up, not wanting to hurt her any more than he already had.
The night Sirius had been killed Tonks had come to Remus seeking comfort and wanting to comfort him in return. But she thought he had merely lost a friend; she did not know then that Sirius had always meant so much more.
The hope in her eyes when Remus had fallen in bed with her that night told him that he was just taking advantage, but he ignored it. Just as he tried to ignore the emptiness he felt without Sirius by trying to fill that void with Tonks.
Tonks clung to the hope that he did love her and she let herself believe what she knew was probably a lie. But she needed it to be true, and so it was.
Well I can't explain why it's not enough
Coz I gave it all to you
And if you leave me now
Oh just leave me now
It's the better thing to do
When Remus had finally tried to push her away, Tonks refused to hear, to accept, what she knew lay behind his words.
"I'm older than you."
"Not by much, and who cares anyway?"
"I have no money."
"I don't need money…I'll support us!"
"I'm a werewolf."
"I'm not afraid."
He couldn't tell her the real reason why they couldn't be, but she knew anyway.
It's time to surrender
It's been too long pretending
There's no use in trying
When the pieces don't fit anymore
"Tonks, please."
"I don't care! I don't care about any of your reasons and excuses, any of it. I don't care about him…"
Oh, don't misunderstand how I feel
Coz I've tried, yes I've tried
Still I don't know why
No I don't know why
The pain in his eyes would have broken her heart, if it hadn't already been shattered by the truth. She loved Remus and had let herself believe that he loved her and even when she knew it all a lie, she clung to him desperately, afraid to let go.
"Tonks, I'm so sorry…I wish I could love you. I've tried so hard, but I just—"
"Stop it! Stop it!"
You pulled me under so I had to give in
Such a beautiful mess that's breaking my skin
Well I'll hide all the bruises; I'll hide all the damage that's done
But I show how I'm feeling until all the feeling has gone
The truth was there and it ripped her apart inside. She had let herself believe the lies that he had told her and himself. Oh how she had loved those lies.
He touched her hair and caressed her cheek, tracing the lines of her tears.
"I'm sorry."
"Me too."
Remus was crying too, for pain he had caused, for the pain he still felt.
"Please Remus, just go."
Well I can't explain why it's not enough
Coz I gave it all to you
And if you leave me now
Oh just leave me now
It's the better thing to do
Tonks let herself cry, let herself feel the raw pain of her own folly. She had tried to mend the pieces of his broken heart and now she was left to pick up the pieces of her own.
It's time to surrender
It's been too long pretending
There's no use in trying
When the pieces don't fit anymore
The pieces don't fit anymore