Chapter One
"She wouldn't."
"Mate, you don't know that."
"Miss Fisher? I know her well enough. And so do you."
"I could at least ask, couldn't I?"
Bert shook his head. "Don't you think she's done enough for us, over the years? C'mon, Cec, be reasonable."
Cec looked gloomily at his hands and muttered, mostly to himself, "Alice set her heart on it, though."
"Well, she'd no right," said Bert in typically forthright fashion.
Cec jerked a shoulder at that. "Don't I know it. But do you want to be the one to tell her you didn't like to ask?"
"Not my job, is it?"
Silence.
"I mean, push comes to shove, it's just a car. We drive cars every day."
"No, we drive the taxi she gave us every day. And the car you're referring to's a Hispano-bleeding-Suiza."
"But it's Alice's big day!"
"Oh, I'm sorry. I coulda sworn it was your big day as well, and spitting in the eye of the lady who's been your best mate, present company excepting, for more'n five years doesn't look to me like a smart way to celebrate!"
On this belligerent note, something barely credible happened. Historians would, in future years, read the words set down on the page and decide that your correspondent had overindulged in mind-altering drugs, because a mistake had surely been made. But no, it must be firmly stated:
Albert Johnson, citizen of the great and growing City of Melbourne, taxi-driver and supporter of the downtrodden masses, set down an unfinished pint of beer on the counter of the bar and left. To make the point more firmly, he slammed the door of the bar behind him.
What was worse (and has sentenced this story to the shelves of Improbable Fiction for all time), Cecil Yates (citizen etc, etc,) then did exactly the same thing.
The fact that he was taller, had longer legs, and was trying to catch up with the man in front of him meant that he was only a few seconds behind Bert (who, in his heart of hearts, wanted to be caught up with anyway, to finish the argument properly) when he left the pub and followed him up the alley.
On the plus side, that meant they both fell over the body at the same time.