So this is a one shot based on the fact that Jesse and Beca have recently broken up, sounds dreary I know and for that I'm sorry. Please read and review, would love to know what you think. I may use this story to post different one shots of Jesse and Beca, all around different things, probably all based around songs. So I'm open to suggestions or prompts from songs, any genre.
Beca was stood behind the wall of her lecture building desperately trying to light a cigarette and struggling against the wind when a familiar figure came into view, most defiantly not someone she would have expected to see in the smoking area.
'I didn't think I would ever see you here.' She shrugged, her voice seemly calm, especially in comparison to the furry of emotions running through her head and her heart right now.
'I go to school here.' Was all he said in return.
'No, I mean, outside smoking.' She said back looking at her feet to hide the blush that had crept onto her face for saying something so stupid. Of course she would see him here, you met him at this school, not even two years ago.
He shrugged allowing silence to fall between the two. Beca in a desperate attempt to keep him talking, god she missed his voice attempted to start a conversation between them again.
'I quit smoking, bad for your voice, and you know how much I love singing for Aubrey.' She stated, instantly regretting it when Jesse didn't laugh at her feeble attempt at a joke.
'I'm joking.' She may as well try and justify herself before looking down at her feet again. 'I mean I did quit, but it feels like a joke now, didn't last long.'
'Old habits die hard I guess.' He responded with a furrowed brow when she finally lifted her head up to look at him.
'I guess.'
Silence, more silence, she had to think of something to say before he left, she wanted to stay here with him, why did it take her so long to realise that, now it was too late, they had broken up two months ago, Jesse fed up of Beca constantly closing up on him and Beca scared of how easy it was to open up to him. So she ran, because that's what Mitchells do, they run.
'Anyway.' He shrugged as he went to walk away, Beca had to stop him, so she said the first thing that came to her mind, freeking Acapella.
'Remember when we used to sing together?' She practically yelled at him in an attempt to get him to turn around. She succeeded and he turned his body to face her, eyes quizzing her. So she continued speaking, she had his attention, so she was going to keep it, even if it meant talking about the hobby she had recently dropped, apparently, when she lost the only thing keeping her in this college, she lost her motivation to sing.
'I mean we didn't even understand what we were singing half the time, but it gave us a voice, people actually listened to us when we sang.'
'I always listened to you Beca.'
Ooop, there it is, the panging in her chest that she had felt daily since she left. The panging that was only replaced by butterflies when she heard his voice.
'I don't sing anymore, but if I did, I would be singing tonight for sure.'
'I always loved your voice Beca.'
She crossed her arms across her chest, as if this physical barrier to her heart might be able to stop all the emotions escaping. No such luck, she continued to speak.
'I keep thinking that somehow the timing seems false.' She lifted her hand to her hair and let it fall through her fingers, she remembered how Jesse used to scold her for doing it when she was nervous. 'Since we broke up I mean, like how some days go faster than my fucking pulse, days when I'm locked in my room listening to music, but others they go so slow, like this morning feels like a month ago.'
Still no response from him other than a sad stare, was it pity? Regret? Beca couldn't tell.
'I feel like I'm under water.' She slipped.
'What?'
Shit, how does she explain that one. Desperate to change the subject she brings up the first thing that comes to mind,
'There's this spot on the quad, by the wall, or on the grass, or whatever.' She was rambling, Jesse nodded to symbolise he was listening to her before she continued. 'These kids sit there now, they carve their names into the pavement and tag the wall, and they've fucking ruined it.' Tears were welling up in her eyes. Why was she getting so emotional over this? She knew exactly why. 'It's like they know it was our spot, and now we don't use it they're going to mess it up, just to hurt me, because they know it meant so much to me.'
'I'm sure that's not why they did it Bec. Kids do stupid things for no reason, yolo and what not' She let a laugh slip through her mouth as the tears rolled down her cheeks. Jesse moved closer to wipe the tears away from her cheeks. She looked up at him before continuing her ramblings, Jesse always wanted her to open up to him, so now was her chance.
'I haven't done anything since we broke up.'
'Bec, you don't have to tell me this.' His hands not leaving where he had placed them on her shoulders whilst she spoke.
'I'm not cleaning or eating properly, the girls are going crazy, they think I've developed some sort of disorder.' He let out an awkward chuckle at that, they had always joked about the amount of food she ate in comparison to her tiny body. 'I'm not even crying, it's like I've gone completely numb, then I run into you and it all wells up and I can't help it, I'm sorry for pinning this all on you Jesse'. The end of her sentence was muffled by the tears begging to fall down her face again.
'I'm an idiot for acting like I did, but fuck you for leaving Jesse, I needed, need you.'
'You kicked me out Bec.' He pleaded.
'Look whatever, Mitchells run, we don't have happy endings.' She laughed and diverted her eyes from Jesses.
'Don't try and joke about this Bec, it's serious, why didn't you tell me this before?'
'I joke Jesse, I'm a fucking clown, it's what I do. I'm making jokes so I don't drown. I didn't tell you because you left.'
'You kicked me out Beca.'
'I was scared. I'm sorry.' Two months' worth of tears finally revealed themselves as Jesse pulled the sobbing girl into his chest.
'I feel like I'm under water these days Jesse.'
'You've said that Bec.'
'I feel like the whole worlds under water and no one can hear me, but you always hear me. I'm so sorry Jesse.'
'It's fine Bec, let's get you cleared up and we can go and talk.'
She wiped away the tears instantly happier when Jesse took her hand in his and began leading her into the dorm circle.
'I really didn't expect to see you smoking Jesse, I didn't mean to let all of this shit out on you.'
'It's really, super honestly fine Bec, this is what I wanted from you to start with, you to open up to me, so maybe it took a lot of shit for it to finally happen, but I'm glad it did.'
Really not happy with this ending, but, eh. Whatever, I'm posting it anyway.