Disclaimer: I do not own the Harry Potter series, nor do I take any claim of ownership with the films.
"When the going gets tough, the tough gets . . . bionic?"
Awkward
"Hermione!" exclaimed Harry as he burst into the girls' lavatory.
Hermione jumped in surprise. "Harry? What are you doing in the girls' bathroom?"
Harry squirmed, twisting his legs together. "Loo," he squeaked.
"What's wrong with the boys'—"
"Full!" Harry almost yelled at her.
Hermione jumped back. "Oh. All right. Go—"
Before Hermione had the time to finish her sentence, Harry had already leaped into one of the small cubicles, almost ripping the door apart in the process.
. . .
"Feel better?" asked Hermione as soon as she caught sight of Harry, his face showing all traces of relief.
Harry nodded. "Much," he said. "Thanks."
He turned his back on Hermione to leave, but Hermione stopped him.
"Wait, Harry!" she called.
Harry turned around as Hermione bit her bottom lip, unsure if she should continue.
"Ahh," she breathed. "You might want to . . . " she looked pointedly towards Harry's unzipped trousers.
Harry's face drained all its colour, his hands immediately flying to cover what's left of his dignity. He turned around and began fiddling with his zipper.
Hermione stood there, waiting, as she began to get curious when Harry still hadn't turned around.
"Any problem?"
Harry spun around only for Hermione's suspicions to be confirmed.
"I might need a bit of help . . . "
Hermione rolled her eyes and stepped toward him. "Harry, this has been going on far too long. Don't you think it's time you purchased a new pair of trousers?"
Harry sighed and knew his friend was right as Hermione's hands began struggling to pull up the zipper.
"It's stuck,"
"What am I going to do? I can't just walk around Hogwarts like this—exposed,"
Hermione had an idea. "Well, I might be able to . . . but then I'd have to . . . "
"Do it, Hermione."
Hermione closed her eyes and pushed her hand down Harry's trousers and grabbed the zipper from the inside as Harry froze and his jaw clenched. Evidently, he hadn't expected that.
A blinding flash caught their attention.
Hermione opened her eyes as she and Harry turned around to see a familiar student staring up at them, a camera in his hands, looking fairly mortified.
Colin.
She didn't know what she hated herself more for: failing to use Reparo to solve Harry's dilemma earlier, or letting Colin Creevey escape with what she knew to be her dignity waiting to be developed.
The table shook and several Gryffindors looked up as Hermione slammed the Daily Prophet onto the surface of the Gryffindor table at breakfast the next day.
"I can't believe they would make such a pathetic scandal from something as perfectly innocent as that," she frowned.
Ron swallowed the three whole sausages in his mouth before speaking. "Hermione, you and Harry were caught, alone, inside the girls' lavatory, with your hand down Harry's trousers," he reminded her as she flushed a deep shade of red and Harry sunk in his seat, remembering the now infamous incident. "It was bound to attract some attention. And it doesn't exactly look 'perfectly innocent' does it?"
Hermione snuck a glance around her to see a small group of third year girls staring at her and giggling amongst themselves.
"But it wasn't what it looked like," she protested. "I was simply helping Harry zip his trousers because apparently, he'd been far too busy to think of sparing himself a maximum of only ten minutes to run and buy a new pair."
Ron smirked. "Well, the evidence doesn't seem to be in agreement with you, does it, Hermione?" he pointed towards the moving picture plastered on the front page of the Daily Prophet. "Besides, I dunno what you're on about. This has happened before, hasn't it? People will believe what they see,"
"And they won't exactly bother with the real story when they're perfectly happy with what's in front of them," added Harry.
Hermione glared at him. "Oh, shut up," she exclaimed. "In case it hasn't occurred to you, Harry Potter, you are involved in this as well,"
And Harry had to agree.
"A picture's worth a thousand words," teased Ron.
Hermione groaned. "This day can't possibly get any worse . . . "
"I wouldn't say that," muttered Ron.
"Well, well, well," the sneering voice of Draco Malfoy rang through their eardrums. "If it isn't Lucky Potter and his little Mudblood," then came the automatic laughter of Crabbe and Goyle.
Hermione, Harry and Ron thought it best to simply ignore them, hoping they would soon tire and leave them alone.
But apparently, they were wrong.
"Tell me, Potter," he sneered. "What's it like having a Mudblood's hand shoved down your arse?"
The laughter began again.
Draco turned to Hermione. "And, Granger, I've frequently doubted the fact that you're a girl, but I guess this photo right here has already proven that true, eh?"
Another roar of laughter came from all three of the invaders.
Hermione stood up from her seat and turned to face the annoying blonde.
"A bit offended now, are we?" taunted Draco. "My father would love to hear about this, but I'm fairly certain he already has. I'm sure he would enjoy this as well as I, and the whole of Hogwarts, did. Don't you think so?"
The loud crunch of a disjointed nose was the last thing that could be heard before emergency brooms were sent for Draco Malfoy's immediate rescue.
A/N: Ah, well, I hope you enjoyed that. Review? :)