"Oh come on, Lee. You know you want to," said Kara.
"I will not. I refuse to deface myself in such a way," responded Lee.
"Too late," said Kara as several of the younger women aboard Galactica dragged Lee down the hall. Kara moved over as several of the female mechanical staff pulled their chief down the hall. As she wandered the halls, Kara wondered why she was not participating in this 'defacement,' as Lee had called it. The 'defacement' was Cally's idea. All of the more 'desirable' males were going to be auctioned off: all proceeds go, of course, to charity. Unfortunately, most of the men seemed to be rather unwilling to go along with it. Kara would love to get her hands on one of her superior officers, or as she called them, superior assholes. Making them run 5 gazillion laps around the ship seemed like a wonderful idea. Unfortunately, Kara had spent the last of her free soap (the current currency in the fleet) on booze several weeks ago. When she turned a corner, Starbuck was hit with a wave of sound. It seemed that Kara had stumbled, by accident of course, on the auction.
"We now have this fine pilot. Ummmm," Kara laughed, for it seemed the auctioneer (who was quite drunk on bribes by now) had forgotten a name, "HOTDOG," screamed someone from the audience. "Hotdog, yes, yes, that's his name. So," and it continued. Kara guessed that she was on the latter half of the proceedings, for the platform that the auction was taking place on was mostly empty. Finally hotdog was given to a random lady, and the last pilot was up.
"Now who would like to pay some big soap for Lee Adama, our favorite CEG. Come on ladies, you know you want him!" A heated battle soon ensued between Ellen Tigh (it seemed the XO was off Galactica this weekend) and several pilots that Lee had put on CAP one too many times. Seeing Lee's face, Kara laughed. He looked like someone had just run over his pet aardvark. Kara decided to do something.
After quickly running to Lee's locker and grabbing all 10 of his soaps, Kara returned to see the battle in full swing.
"Five Soaps," yelled Mrs. Tigh.
"Five and a quarter," yelled one of the random voices (yes, there are a lot of them)
"TEN SOAPS," screamed Kara. Everyone looked put out, except Lee. There was definitely a look of relief on his face.
"Sold to the nice blond lady with all the soap!" yelled the auctioneer (since he was drunk, it came out to more "ssssol ter da n-hiccup- lerdy wit all der sup"). Lee made his way down to her.
"You look like someone just told you that all the cylons are dead and we can go home!" yelled Kara over the exiting crowd. Lee just smiled in relief.
"So. I thought you were out of soap? Where'd you get ten cakes from?" asked Lee quietly when everyone left.
"Let's just say we can now be broke together." replied Starbuck.
"KARA!" Lee yelled, and made a grab at her. But, Kara was far out of reach, up the hall and around the corner before Lee could finish. Needless to say, he went after her.