Sam could not believe after all the praying he had done to Cas, Dean calls once and Cas just hops to it.

"What, is he like your favourite?" he asks incredulously.

Looking slightly uncomfortable, Cas reluctant replies, "Dean and I do share a more profound bond..."

One shot for my pain…

He licked his lips and moaned softly as he savoured the burn of the whiskey going down his throat and settling warmly in his stomach.

One shot for my sorrow…

As soon as that was down, he picked up the waiting shot glass of brandy. Cheersing to…well, nothing actually, he gulped the brown spirit.

Get messed up today…

Dean Winchester drank beers like they were water. And hard liquor like they were beers. He knew mixing his drinks wasn't a good idea but with his high tolerance for alcohol, drinking like he normally did would barely get him a buzz. And he needed to be gone.

I'll be okay tomorrow…

It's not every day your brother (a) accuses you of being a selfish, needy bastard, as well as (b) claims you do nothing but sacrifice other people for your own purposes, and let's not forget (c) tells you he would let you die in extenuating circumstances. Sam should have carved out his heart with a butter knife instead. Would have hurt less.

There was something about the middle of the night, the dark and the quiet, that seemed to make all the thoughts one would normally suppress come out and play. And all Dean could hear was

Samdoesn'tloveyouHedoesn'tcareYou'reafailureasahunterANDabrother…

He figured he just had to drown the voice with alcohol til morning. Then the sunlight would chase the darkness away, both outside and in his own soul.

He looked behind him at the sound of flapping wings, totally unsurprised to see Castiel standing there. He turned back to his spiralling without a word. Cas came to stand beside him.

"I heard chatter indicating a strong demonic presence in Springfield, Missouri. There's a good chance it's Abbadon. Still nothing on Gadreel."

Without turning to the angel, Dean replied, "We'll go first thing in the morning."

"It is morning, Dean."

Laughing mirthlessly, Dean tried to get up and lost his balance. Cas caught him.

Pressed against the angel, he slurred, "Well then, let's go now.."

Having never seen Dean this belligerently drunk, Cas now knew something was amiss but decided to act like he was humouring the hunter.

"Shall I wake Sam or will you?"

"NO! No Sam. No Sammy…" Dean's head drooped against Cas' chest, "We can take care of this one ourselves, can't we, Cas?"

Sighing, Cas said, "You can't even take care of yourself in this state-"

"Bullshit. I'm fine…"

Cas heaved upright and positioned him so that he and Cas were face to face. Cas put hands on both sides of Dean's face, shaking him and trying to get his eyes to focus. While doing this, Cas couldn't help but notice that Dean's lips were still wet from whatever hard liquor he had been imbibing. The moisture made them shine in the bunker's lighting, and Cas started noticing things

'How soft and pink they were…the natural pucker to them…"

Cas shook himself. He had only noticed such things about females before. And anyway, now was not the time. Based on the vehemence with which Dean had refused to involve Sam, Cas was convinced the two had had a falling out. He inwardly winced at this turn of events. The Winchesters on the outs was not only annoying and uncomfortable for anyone in the vicinity (usually him), it also somehow always ended up having potentially world-altering consequences.

Castiel would never understand how such strong, brave, intelligent capable men who had saved countless lives and the entire world more than once, still fell prey to sibling spats.

When Dean stopped trying to keep himself upright and felt onto Cas' chest, he let him stay there for a while, feeling the warmth of the man's body on his own. He could feel and hear Dean's heartbeat. He closed his eyes and remembered all the times since he had pulled Dean from the Pit, when that sound had seemed like the most important thing in the universe. As long as Dean Winchester was still breathing, there was a chance.

Cas didn't even feel his arms move from under Dean's arms to his back but he noticed the hard ridges of muscle his fingers were now tracing through the flannel that covered them. Cas tilted his head so that his cheek rested against Dean's dirty blonde hair. His groan at the softness of it was quiet but Dean heard.

Wriggling a little, Dean slurred, "Caaaasssssss….what're you dooooooiiiiiiinnnnnnnggggg?"

Positioning his mouth by Dean's ear, Cas whispered, "You claim you are fit to hunt Abbadon right now?"

"Damn straight."

Cas pulled Dean to his feet again and looked into the man's beautiful, unfocused eyes.

"Then save yourself."

With those words, Cas pulled Dean to him and attacked his lips with his own. Cas moaned as he realised that the lips were as soft and pliant as he thought. He tentatively pushed his tongue past those perfect lips to explore the warmth inside. Dean wasn't responding but that was okay. Just getting to kiss Dean like this was enough for Cas. He would gladly have stayed like that with Dean til the sun came up.

Then Dean started to fight back. Even saturated with alcohol, Dean Winchester was still…well Dean Winchester. Cas reluctantly broke away from that sensational mouth and opened his eyes. To see Dean's confused ones staring at him. He kept looking for a moment, he would never be able to get over how mesmerising Dean's eyes were, then wrapped one of his broad hands around Dean's neck. He applied only the slightest pressure before leaning into nip at the areas his hand didn't cover. He sucked at the tender flesh there and then dragged his teeth over it, making sure it would leave a mark. When he was done, Cas muttered to Dean,

"Save yourself, Dean."

Dean tried. He really did. But even sober, he couldn't beat Cas in a hand-to-hand fight. Angel/human fights tend to go like that. He pushed against Cas, he tried to knee him, he tried to land blows to his midsection; whenever Dean did make contact, Cas didn't even flinch, like he couldn't feel it. Underneath the alcohol-induced zen, Dean could feel the beginnings of terror.

Cas spun Dean around and bent him over the table. Dean could feel Cas' rock-hard erection poking into his ass as Cas ground and moaned against him. Cas cupped Dean's ass cheeks in his hands and squeezed, enjoying the soft-but-not-flabbiness. He ran his hands up his ass and down again, continuing his massaging motions. Then one of his hands found its way onto Dean's back and Cas followed it, leaning right over the prone hunter. He pushed Dean's shirt up and kissed his way up Dean's spine, stopping every once in a while to nip at the skin at the sides.

Dean could feel the sharpness of Castiel's teeth when he did this, and knew the angel was in another place. Dean had no idea why Cas was doing this and a million questions raced through his mind.

Is he possessed? Can angels even get possessed? Is this even Cas? What the fuck is wrong with him?

Cas could feel the tension in Dean's body and while he wanted nothing better than to rip off the human's pants and fuck it all away, haste was not necessary. Cas intended to get as much out of this as he possibly could.

Standing upright, he spun Dean back around and forced him to his knees. While he undid his pants with one hand, Cas pushed the forefinger and middle finger of his other hand past Dean's moist lips. Pressing them onto his tongue, Cas commanded Dean to suck them. Dean tried to spit them out.

Seeing this act of disobedience, Cas grabbed Dean by the forehead and rammed his head back into the table with enough force to daze him.

"Suck," he repeated.

Dean complied, finding no reason is his currently addled brain not to. Cas closed his eyes and focused on the wet, tight feeling of Dean around his fingers. His hardness twitched at the thought of how Dean would feel around his…

His cock now freed from his pants, Cas withdrew his fingers from Deans mouth and placed his head against Dean's now spit-moistened lips. He wiped it across Dean's lips slowly, savouring the feel of those lips against his manhood. Dean's head started to droop. Cas frowned; the alcohol and the blow to the head was a lot for his body to handle conscious, it seemed. Moving quickly, Cas pushed the tip of his dick into Dean's mouth. When Dean tried sluggishly to move away, Cas grabbed the back of his head and forced Dean right down until Dean was literally choking on the rigid length.

The warmth of Dean around him and the tightness of his throat on his head almost had Cas coming right then. With a loud groan, Cas pulled out of Dean's mouth nearly completely, then slid back in. He set a slow pace, wanting to enjoy every moment, every sensation. One hand, behind Dean's head guiding him, the other caressed the elder Winchester's cheek and ran through his hair, creating an odd image of abuse and tenderness.

Deciding it was time he came, Cas ordered Dean to suck him hard, as the man had not been participating at all hitherto. When Dean made no change, Cas grabbed his throat and squeezed pitilessly, his cock still in Dean's mouth. In fact, he pushed himself balls deep into Dean and pressed right into his face. Dean began to pummel him with his fists, getting more frantic the longer he was denied oxygen. When the blows became desperate, Cas pulled back and let Dean breathe.

"I told you…to suck me hard. I won't ask again." He said flatly.

Shame seeping into every part of his body, Dean complied. He had never given a blowjob before but he figured he was doing alright when Cas started moaning his name amidst swear words Dean didn't even know he knew.

"Deeeeeaaaaannnn…fuck yea…suck me…oohh shiiiiiitttttttt….so good…"

Cas thought the sex he had had with that women before she killed him was good. That was a lukewarm shower compared to this…this ecstasy. Even open, Cas saw stars before his eyes. He saw colours humans couldn't even dream of, their limited minds unable to appreciate such beauty. Cas knew he was losing himself. And he didn't care.

His pace picked up and before long, he was brutally fucking Dean's face. His dick dripped with Dean's saliva. Dean's mouth and jaws were so sore…he couldn't take any more of this but Cas refused to let him move. The wet slap Cas' body made every time it hit Dean's face made him feel so sick. Just then, Dean would have made a deal with a crossroads demon just not to hear that sound anymore.

By now, Cas was screaming his pleasure. He knew he was close. He thrust himself balls deep down Dean's throat and rode out his ecstasy. He came in long, hot spurts down the man's throat. He gripped Dean's head against him, unwilling to let him move an inch in case that compromised his pleasure. When he came down off his high, Cas sighed, sounding spent and finally withdrew from Dean's mouth.

Dean fell to one side and was scrambling on his hands and knees to get a few feet away from…was it even Cas?…before rising to his feet. Before he could do this, however, Cas' strong arms gripped both of his and dragged him back, beding him over the table once more.

Dean thought it was over. He was beyond confused as to why he was back here again. Then he felt a hard jerk on his lower body, heard a loud rip and felt cold air on his ass. Once again, Cas started his massaging motions on his ass. It felt all the more violating now as there was no cloth barrier between Cas' hands and his skin. When Cas bent over him, Dean thought he was gonna bite his back again but the angel only wanted to taunt him some more.

"In the interest of full disclosure, I think now is the appropriate time to tell you that I am not going to prep you," Cas ran a hand from Dean's hair over the same ear he was speaking into, rubbing the top between his thumb and forefinger, "If there was ever a good time to save yourself, Dean, it is now. For I intend to make you scream."

Dean used strength reserves he didn't even know he had thrashing against Cas, trying his damnedest to get away but he couldn't even shift the angel. In the midst of his last desperate attempts to get away from the monster behind him, Dean could feel that same thing Cas had put on his lips and down his throat pressing against his virgin hole. Dean shut his eyes tight and prayed for oblivion.

Then the pressure behind him was gone.

Dean heard a few thumps then felt cold air on him again, instead of Cas' warmth. He heard grunts too and the definite low thuds of exchanged blows. Aware of the melee occurring behind him, all Dean could do was slink to his knees, holding onto the table that he had just been braced against. Doing that alone took the meagre strength he had left and just before he let go, he heard a voice.

"Dean!"

He heard shuffling and felt a hard body beneath him before his back could hit the floor. He faintly recalled hearing the flapping of wings and figured that Cas was gone. Darkness closing in, Dean looked up and into the eyes of his brother. Sam held on, shaking him and shouting his name. Dean was too weak. He knew he was going unconscious and he didn't want to fight anymore.

With a mirthless laugh, Dean bitterly said, "Thought you wouldn't save me…"

He gave in to oblivion.

Author's Note: That scene at the end of 9.13 broke my heart like i was afraid to keep watching cuz my heart could not take the feels. This story was my attempt to dump all my negative feelings before the next ep lol. Oversharing over. Read and review please :D #spnfamily