Disclaimer: All characters belong to JK Rowling. The plot and storyline are mine. JK, if you're reading - wanna trade?

A/N: I'm baaaaaaack! YAY! *Does mini-Mexican wave to herself* I have missed writing on here SO SO MUCH! I hate Uni! :P This is a fic I promised my friend ageesssssss ago, but unfortunately RL means I've only just gotten around to it now. It's definitely going to be a two-shot, possibly a three-shot if I get inspired enough. We'll see, but for now: Enjoy! :)

Part 1: The Revelation (Lily's POV)

BANG!

Lily jerked awake at once, disoriented for a minute as she tried to comprehend what had woken her.

There had been a thundering bang from below her, and now, as she started to fully process her surroundings, she became aware of the acrid smell of smoke curling up the staircase.

One thought came screaming through the fog into her head like a foghorn: James.

James!

"James!" Wasting no more time, she scrambled free of the quilt cover and grabbed at the wand she now slept with, before racing from the bedroom.

"James? James?" She took the stairs two at a time, aware of nothing but the mantra pounding like a drumbeat in her head and her stomach; please let him be ok, please let him be ok, please let him…

"JAMES!" Her cries grew louder as worry and panic began to completely engulf her, and she rushed foolishly towards the kitchen door, any concern she should have had for her own safety masked by the desire to hurt, to kill, anyone who had even dared to…

Kicking the door open, she raised her wand towards the slowly fading smoke. "SECTUM-"

"LILY, DON'T SHOOT! Or, er, 'spell', as it were." She dropped her wand as relief smashed into her like a wrecking ball; James!

"Oh thank god!" she breathed, as the little smoke left began to dissipate, out the still open door and into the hallway. "Merlin James, are you ok? You should have called out or something, for a second there I'd thought he'd-"

She cut off abruptly as her husband – her husband! Merlin, what had she been thinking? – finally came into view. And then:

"Jesus, what the hell did you do to yourself, you twat?!"

"Well, I…we, umm…well…" He coughed, shifting awkwardly from foot to foot. "Well, like I said, no need to panic – it's just us. Or, errr…half of us, at least." James leaned down and offered a hand to Sirius as he spoke, heaving the other man to his feet. Sirius dusted himself off, grinning and totally at ease.

"Yeah, where are Moony and Wormtail anyways?"

"That's hardly what he meant Sirius! Fucking hell James, are they real?" Lily's voice was verging on hysteria, and the squirming hazel-eyed man facing her at least had the decency to look guilty.

Sirius, on the other hand, felt no such shame. He grinned wolfishly at the furious redhead, nodding in admiration as he thumped his friend on the back. She opened her mouth to respond, but James – who could smell a Lily breakdown at twenty paces – quickly jumped in to diffuse the situation.

"Seriously Lils, don't panic! It's only temporary. I, uhh, I think."

Naturally, his words had the opposite of the desired effect.

"You think? You THINK?! James, you've got fucking antlers coming out of your head! Clearly, you did anything but think!" As the words drove home the reality of the situation, she felt another wave of the nausea that had sent her to bed wash over her. Deep breaths, Lily, deep breaths. What in the hell was she thinking though, seriously?!

"Lily, just breathe. Really, I can explain."

"No you can't." Sirius spoke up once more, rolling his eyes skyward. "No offence Prongs, but you're bloody useless when it comes to Lily. I'll handle this." He turned to her and bowed exaggeratedly. "That is, if Madame will let me?"

There was a moment's silence where Lily's gaze flicked disbelievingly between the two. James blushed and mouthed 'sorry', but Sirius just shrugged nonchalantly, seeming 100% at ease with the shaggy tail and whiskers he was now sporting.

"Your choice, Lils. Prongs can ramble and stutter like the poor excuse for a Marauder that he is – where you're concerned," he amended willingly, as James yelped in indignation, "or I can give you the bare facts."

Grudgingly, she nodded. Eyes narrowed, she folded her arms across her chest and gave him a look that clearly said '"I'm waiting."

"See, it's like this, Lils. Halloween's just around the corner, and we-"

"-and by that, he means he," James cut in half-heartedly, earning himself a glare from both his wife and his best friend.

"-and WE were trying to come up with costume ideas. So then James-"

"-and by that, he means we-"

"So then JAMES said wouldn't it be cool if we went as us. You know, as in, animagus. Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs." He chuckled at his own joke appreciatively, but his best friend's wife remained decidedly unimpressed.

"So...what? You thought that instead of just transforming like normal bloody people would, you'd transfigure yourselves to look like them?" Her tone was still thick with anger and scathing, but she felt her heart rate slow a little. Transfiguration was OK. Transfiguration, though entirely stupid, was also entirely fixable.

"Yeah, not exactly." She blinked, confused. "We considered transforming, but didn't want to risk it, what with us being illegal and all…"

"So?"

"Well, you know that Potions was always more your wheel-house than ours…" She blanched, comprehending.

"But hey, I'm sure Mad-Eye'll never even miss a flask of Polyjuice. I mean, we only took one." Sirius winked in a poor attempt at charming humour, and James winced, bracing himself for impact. Sure enough…

SLAP!

"POLYJUICE POTION? What were you thinking James?!"

"Lily, I know you're-"

"No, actually, what was I thinking? I mean, Merlin, its bad enough having to look after one fully-grown child…"

"-Come on Lils, surely you must see the funny side-"

"Funny? You think this is FUNNY, James Potter? Easy for you to say! You're not the one that's going to have to have eyes in the back of her head! "

"Lily, what are you rambling on about?!" James own voice rose in confusion and frustration.

"I'm talking about the fact that I thought having one kid to look after was going to be bad enough! I completely forgot that I was going to have two to deal with!" Her arms were gesticulating between herself and her 6'2" – 6'5", if you were counting the antlers – husband wildly, but Sirius seemed to take her words as a personal insult.

"Woah there, Evans, I definitely resent that." He puffed up his chest, stroking a whisker resolutely between forefinger and thumb. "Now I may act like a child at times, but let me assure you, where it counts? I'm all man!" He nodded convincingly, with another saucy wink, but Lily didn't even falter.

"Oh, for Christ's sake Sirius, I'm not talking about you! I'm talking about the miniature bloody him" – she thrust her finger accusingly in James' direction – "that I'm currently growing inside of me!"

She broke off, breathing heavily.

And then there was silence.

A/N: Watch out for Chapter 2 - The Reaction (James' POV). Will try to have it up in the next couple of days!

Reviews are better than my Animagus jokes! ;)