The Difference Between You and Me

NOTE: I DO NOT OWN ANY CHARACTERS. CHARACTERS BELONG TO STEPHANIE MAYER. THANK YOU.

I stepped into the bathtub and closed the curtain behind me as I reached for the tap compressor to turn on my shower. Turning the handle all the way to the little metal flame symbol, I let the water pour onto my naked skin and colour me in red. I needed this to burn away the feeling of rejection sinking into my bones and right through my skin, slowly penetrating right down to my soul.

My rain soaked clothes lay in a pile on the floor beside the sink where I stripped out of them in one single place. I didn't have the energy to worry about them ruining my wooden floor and dampening the ground. I couldn't think about anything else but the last sentence I heard.

"It didn't mean anything to me either Bella, if that's what you're implying, it was just some fun," he said.

I don't think I could have ever anticipated for the way he made me feel and the way his words would break me down to my very core. I suppose it was my fault just as much as it was his and I feared to face the fact that I was just stupid. Plain stupid.

Why would I think that things between us could change? What made us so special that we could defy the laws of friendship and end up lovers all the same? Clearly I had been stuck in some stupid fairy tale that not even I could believe in any longer.

I stood under the hot spray of water, breathing in the steam and trying to calm down my shaking. The cold rain had penetrated my skin, which was ironic as it couldn't have come at a more fitting time as his words laced through my body and into my soul. I was shivering in the heat and I knew it was because my anxiety was taking over me and eating me from the inside. I couldn't breathe evenly and the bitter sweet reality was that the only person who could help me was the person who put me in this mess.

But I had to stop blaming only him. I knew it was my fault too. Had I not been so clingy and careless, I wouldn't be here crying. If only things had gone a little different…

My thoughts were interrupted when I heard the door swing open and a gush of cold air hit my body in contact with the red burns, making me jump and instinctively turn towards the door. The curtain was covering the whole bath and I knew that whoever was out there couldn't see me, but I still felt as if I was on show in all my naked glory.

If I didn't know it was him standing behind the curtains, I should have been scared for an intruder stepping inside my bathroom. I didn't live with anyone, and my parents didn't have a key. Only him. So I wasn't scared, only more riddled in anxiety and my chest began to tighten as a sob chocked my throat because I wouldn't dare let it out.

"Bella," he stated, his words breaking through the silence of the white noise the shower created. His voice silky smooth yet laced with all emotions I couldn't see. He was angry, upset and desperate. The complete opposite of how I had left him. I didn't answer him in hopes of drowning in the spray, as if I could somehow turn to liquid and disappear forever into the drains. Not the cleanest way to go but I would take anything over a confrontation with him.

I heard him close the door with a soft click and shuffle around the bathroom as I stood unmoving behind the shower curtain, silently gasping for air and holding back the sobs that settled painfully in my throat. I would have thought I was all cried out over this non sense but my body betrayed me once again.

"Bella…" he repeated again, softer this time but still laced with everything he didn't yet say.

"Please leave," I whispered, just about loud enough for him to hear. The water continued to batter my skin, leaving red marks where it hit half of my body, the other slowly drying in the cold air. I waited for his response unmoving, only hearing him shuffle around slightly, unaware of his intended moves.

"No. Not until you talk to me and tell me what is going on," he demanded.

"I'm not gonna do this Edward…please leave."

"I'm not going anywhere Bella," he replied, his voice stern and powerful, echoing around me and repeating in my mind time and time again.

I knew I couldn't keep it from him any longer and keep pretending like everything is alright, or else I wouldn't have ran home in the middle of the night in the rain just to avoid the confrontation when the topic presented itself. As soon as we started talking about what is going on between us, what happened that night, it's as if my best friend disappeared and came back that cocky bastard that he was to everyone outside of our little world. He was the player Edward. The asshole manwhore Edward everyone else knows and I always defend.

"Well I have nothing to say to you, so leave," I spoke, finding more strength in my voice now that I was angrier than just upset. However this didn't take away from the fact I still ached for him and things to be different. Except now it's too late.

"I am not going anywhere until you tell me what is going on. Why did you run off like that? What happened? What am I missing? What happened between us?"

What happened between us? I huffed as the realisation cut through me like a knife and I was once again reminded that he didn't feel the same way as I did. He didn't love me like I loved him. He didn't ache for me like I ached for him. And he sure as hell didn't want to be with me in the same way I want to be with him. That was the problem.

"What happened between us? I still can't believe you would say that. If you knew me even remotely you would know what happened between us and that the night we spent together wasn't just 'great fun' that we had. It meant something to me Edward. It meant everything to me. And clearly we're not on the same page. That's what's different between me and you. I feel too much and end up getting hurt while you don't feel anything past the surface. I thought I knew you better than that and I thought that maybe… just maybe…" I trailed off unable to finish my sentence.

Suddenly Edward moved the curtain and was standing in the bathtub with me. Completely naked. Just like me. I probably should have been more reactive to his nudity – and my own – but I was too emotional to care. He always took my breath away and this wasn't any different, except that now I didn't dare show it. He stood with his feet firmly planted, body tense and rigid in front of me.

"No Bella, the difference between me and you is that I don't hide away and pretend nothing happened, expecting you to magically understand my feelings. The difference between me and you is that I'm not afraid to show my feelings for you which you clearly don't seem to understand. I only said it was fun because I thought that's what you wanted. I thought that you wanted me to pretend for your sake, because you didn't like me like I liked you. Then you go and run off hurt and insulted because you are too scared to speak to me. This involves me too Bella and I am tired of walking in circles trying to understand what is going inside your head. I thought I knew how you felt about me, I thought you loved me…I can't read your mind Bella. You have to tell me how you feel."

As he spoke, he stepped closer and closer to me until now his copper hair was soaking in water while he stood right in front of me, his body losing the tension he once had. His chest brushed passed mine and the contact made me shiver again and light fire to all my nerves despite trying to be upset or angry with him. I couldn't. I loved him.

"I love you."

That was all that I could muster up and that was all that I would say because I couldn't find any other words inside me to express how I felt. Those words were the simplest but the strongest that I could every say. And it showed because Edward suddenly smiled my favourite crooked smile that only I ever saw. This was the Edward that only I got to see.

Suddenly his hands were cupping my face with his fingers moving into my wet hair, moving the tangles away from my face. His thumbs traced the tops of my cheeks where my tears still lingered but were now sinking into my skin. We stared at each other, his emerald green eyes boring into mine as all the anger disappeared and they suddenly lit up with excitement.

"I know," he said, pursing his lips into that cheeky smile that only spoke mischief. For a moment I felt he was mocking me, making me confess my feeling to him only to laugh at my remarks. Was my love for him funny?

"And that's what's wrong with this…with us…that's what's different between us. I love you…no, I am in love with you and you…you want to have fun… I...I can-" I spoke, suddenly teary eyed again and angry all the same, because I didn't want to be his puppet of mischief, and the doll he wishes to play with for a kick. I can't handle that.

"No Bella, that's what's right with us. The difference between you and me is that I'm not scared to believe that this beautiful human standing in front of me, this human that makes my day better with just a 'hello', loves me. I'm not scared of this, but you are, which makes you doubt my feelings for you. That's hardly fair, isn't it," he said and the dipped his head so we were eye to eye level, lips only inches apart and our breathing rigidly out of sync. "You have to stop pretending Bel. I love you too. I've loved you since we met – maybe I didn't realise what it was then but I knew you were special in some way. I just knew. I love you Bella."

Then he kissed me.

But it wasn't like any other kiss we had ever shared. It wasn't like the sweet pecks we'd share greeting each other, it wasn't like the soft kisses we'd share when comforting one another as friends, it wasn't even like the night of passion we endorsed ourselves, opening up the deepest parts of ourselves to each other. No, it wasn't like that at all. This was fire, electricity and passion. It was excitement, fear and love.

This kiss was us. Us finally opening up and falling for one another without a second thought. This was us finally kissing each other as lovers might without second thoughts of 'what if' and 'what will happen when…'

This kiss wasn't hurried or short or surfaced on a greeting. This was a deep introduction from his soul reaching for mine, slowly moving in silence, speaking a language only we could understand, because this kiss was everything we were unable to say and express.

Edward's hands moved me closer to him, pressing my naked body against hiss, moving his arms down to wrap around me, clutching me to him. My arms moved around his neck to bring him closer to me as much as I could, standing under the shower spray making out like teenagers might.

"I love you Edward." I whispered against his lips, feeling the breath leave me with every word as the reality of it all hit me. I told him how I felt and he felt the same way.

"I know, I love you too Bella." He smiled against my lips and continued to softly caress me with his lips.

We didn't stop making out like teenagers until the water ran cold and the water spray no longer made us feel clean. It just created a slippery obstacle for us to tackle, which didn't feel very safe. When we turned the tap off, Edward stepped out first and wrapped one of the towels around his waist, hiding his manhood away from me. His eyes ranked over my body and suddenly I felt more exposed than I had ever been. My breasts were on full show, nipples perk and yearning for him. Even though I felt exposed, it still felt right with his eyes on me. He wrapped a towel around my torso and once again pulled me close towards his body, his chest pressing onto me, though I wished the towel wasn't there. His eyes looked over my skin and he now realised the red blotches of raised skin starting to present themselves over me left side of my body.

"Why'd you let the water run so hot? You got minor burns now Bella… we should got put some lotion on this before you feel the after affects," he laughed. He placed a soft kiss on my shoulder and turned around to pick up my Victoria's secret lotion that he'd bought for me for Christmas. The loss of contact made me sad but I didn't reach for him, even though I desperately wanted to, I still wasn't sure what was happening and the game he's playing with me.

"Told you I would get to use this on you sometime," he winked as he squirted some lotion onto his hand. He slowly moved it over my shoulder and down my arm, then unwrapped the back of my towel to apply it to my side and hip. His hands lingered a little while longer the lower they moved, moving around to my backside and resting there for longer than needed, his eyes never leaving mine all the while.

"Why are you doing this Edward?" I asked, my voice barely a whisper as all my confidence of his feelings for me had suddenly disappeared. Why would he feel anything towards me?

"I love you." He said matter-of-factly. "I have been waiting to love you for longer than you can imagine… so let me love you Bella."

"But do you?" I asked, doubt laced over my voice and changing the demeanour in my whole body, instinctively pulling slightly away from him. Edward sighed and smiled my smile as his eyes met mine with promise.

"Let me show you then if you don't believe me."

And he did. He showed me exactly how much he loved me. That night, that month, that year and for the rest of my life. I often wondered why I was so stupid to not recognise his feelings for me, but I suppose I was too busy trying to ide my own from him, I never realised how we both felt at the same time.

That's the difference between Edward and I. He knew I loved him before I realised I loved him, giving him all that time to fall in love with me with brighter eyes than I have ever seen. Only love could make those emerald greens sparkle like they did. And they only sparkled like that for me.

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A/N: Hello everyone! I hope you have enjoyed this as much as I have enjoyed writing it. I haven't written any type of story for over a year now when I was doing English Language A-level, which is greatly different to the type of stuff I like on fanfiction. This scene has been sitting with me for a while and I decided to finally put it into words, and what better way than to do it with Bella and Edward?

This obviously isn't the greatest work you will ever read – I am a very amateur writer – however I do aim to get better if I write any more.

Reviews would be VERY much appreciated because I love to hear people's feedback, good or bad!

Love, Gabi.

P.s. If you didn't understand what the back story is; Bella and Edward are in their mid-20s, they are best friends despite secretly liking each other. One night Bella was quite vulnerable and seek for comfort with Edward, resulting in them having sex. Bella became very cautious that Edward doesn't feel the same way, despite him being more than willing to sleep with her. So when Edward noticed her discomfort he thought that she didn't like him like he originally thought she did, so he pretended that night didn't mean anything to him. But it did. When Bella brought up the topic, Edward tried to make things easier for her and said it was just some fun for them, not realising that that isn't the way she actually feels. To this Bella reacts badly and runs home in the rain, when Edward follows after a while. Then that scene begins.