Counter Curse
By darkchakram
NC-17 for implied sexual violence and language.
Disclaimer: All characters are the property of J. K. Rowling.
Summary: The War has started. LIly turns to Snape in her hour of need.
Severus Snape did not take out the Cokeworth Times. Frankly, he thought Muggle news tiresome and beneath him. Yet, as he walked home one drizzly late winter morning, he nearly tripped over a plastic wrapped newspaper. Instead of kicking it out of the way, he bent over and picked it up. He could use it to line the cage of the owl he'd recently purchased.
Snape opened the door to his home on Spinner's End, thankful that he'd left the fire burning. He looked to the empty armchair with glee. Turning his father over to the Dark Lord had been the best decision he'd ever made. Even if his mother had sacrificed herself trying to plead for her husband's life. Love certainly made people foolish.
Severus poured himself a glass of elven wine and sat down in the tattered but comfortable chair. He tossed the Cokeworth Times on the old three-footed table and opened up a book on potion theory. He'd been working on an immortality potion. He'd hoped to have had it perfected by Christmas to present as a gift to the Dark Lord. But Christmas had come and gone. Unfortunately, it hadn't come together as quickly as he would've liked.
Landing on the page that dealt with uses of Nightshade, Severus skimmed his fingers along the words as he read quietly to himself. An annoyingly loud bang on his front door disturbed his leisure. "This had better be important," he growled to himself.
He saw the blurred figure through the frosted glass of his front door. The long platinum hair falling out of the hooded cloak left little doubt as to who stood on the other side. Severus opened the door. "Lucius."
Lucius Malfoy tipped his head toward Snape and lowered his hood. "It has begun. I thought you would have been at the Dark Lord's estate this evening." A hint of accusation danced on Malfoy's tongue.
"Had the Dark Lord wanted my presence, I am sure he would have made his feelings known. I was attending to other matters."
"Mulciber really outdid himself this time." Malfoy grinned.
Snape nearly winced but then fought to keep his face impassive. "And you? Did you take your turn?"
"I wouldn't touch her with your dick, she's a Muggle, afterall. Some of us have tastes Quite a fighter though, I'll giver her that, must be in the DNA! I'm sure you'll take a turn when . . ."
"Did you come here for a specific purpose, Lucius. Or are you only here to bore me with your voyeurism?" Snape had had enough.
Malfoy cocked his perfectly sculpted eyebrow. "I just found it curious that you chose tonight, of all nights, to stay in."
"As I said, the Dark Lord needed me elsewhere,"
When it became apparent that Snape was not going to invite him in, Malfoy pulled his hood back on and backed away from the front door. "Funny then that he asked after you. Isn't it?" With a satisfied smirk, Malfoy disapparated from Spinner's End.
A tiny jolt of panic ripped through Severus. So, the Dark Lord had noticed his absence. Severus took calming breaths as he made his way back to his sitting room. He was going to know why he'd chosen not to come. He was going to perceive it as weakness. He'd no doubt humiliate him, punish him for his lingering sentimentality. Severus could feel himself losing control. The urge to crush something, to destroy was overwhelming. He picked up the Cokeworth Times and flung it across the room. "Fuck!"
The paper slipped from the plastic bag and hit the opposite wall in a black and white blur. A colorful advertisement flew free, rising high into the air before lilting down to the floor in a back and forth rhythm. He had failed. Failed his Lord. First the immortality potion and now this.
Severus took another deep breath. He'd fix things. He had to. There was nothing left in this life for him, except his Dark Lord. A man who'd been more father to him than his own father ever had. A man who'd taught him, guided him. Who'd been there for him in those dark days when. . .No, he wouldn't speak her name, wouldn't even think it. They were getting what they deserved, all of them!
Cold rage burned inside him. It was always her! She made him weak. Foolish, just like his mother!
Fury propelled him to kick the muggle paper from where it had landed on the floor. The various pages scattered across the room. Severus pulled his wand and directed it at the sheets and they soared toward the fireplace.
Suddenly, he summoned a particularly offensive page toward him. It was the society page. As if Muggles had society! They were scum! But worse were the wizards who associated with Muggles, like the bespeckled man who smiled back at him from the society page. James Potter sat on the page, unmoving. Next to him, the cause of Severus' turmoil.
Severus' breath left him as he read the announcement. Bile rose into the back of his throat. Had someone kicked him? His heart strings must have snapped because the pain in his chest was so severe he wasn't sure he'd ever be able to move again.
There was a sadness to Lily's smile that Severus had never noticed before, or was he just hoping that she looked incomplete, unwhole without him?
He re-read the announcement as if it hadn't been painful enough going through it the first time.
Mr. and Mrs. Harry Evans would like to announce the wedding of
their daughter Lily to James Potter of Godric's Hollow. The young
couple are to be wed June 1 in Godric's Hollow. The newlyweds
will vacation on the continent before Mr. Potter begins college in
the fall..
Hmpfh, college, Snape rolled his eyes. Some cover story! Potter had barely made it out of Hogwarts. No word on what Lily planned on doing. Severus gently touched her face in the still photo. He hadn't realized he was crying until a fat drop landed on her face and soaked through the paper.
"No!" Severus wailed, balled up the paper, and tossed it into the fire.
He poured himself another glass of wine and downed it in one gulp. It wasn't going to do the trick. He wondered if his father had left any bottles in the kitchen. He rummaged through the cabinets until he found half a bottle of whisky. He didn't even bother with a shot glass. He drank it straight from the bottle.
It burned, for which he was grateful. He'd never felt so cold. His insides felt like ice. He stood by the fire as he nursed the bottle, trying desperately to warm his hands.
His mind turned to the announcement again. He took sadistic pleasure in the fact that the parents who'd blasted their good news to the Muggle world would never get to see their daughter marry Potter. Served them right for welcoming Potter into their family with open arms.
For the first time since Lucius had relayed the news, Severus gloried in the image of Mulciber violating Mrs. Evans. Severus had have a mind to go to Godric's Hollow and have a go at the daughter.
No sooner had the horrific thought popped in his head than the annoying rapping on his door returned. He was ready for Lucius this time.
Severus was so blinded by hate that he didn't even take notice of the image on the other side of the frosted glass.
He jerked the door open and jumped when he saw Lily standing on his doorstep, distraught.
Unlike Malfoy, she didn't wait to be invited in. She blew past Severus and headed straight for the sitting room. She also helped herself to his seat.
Presumptuous little cunt, his bitterness taunted his mind.
But as he leaned on the doorframe looking at her, he became sickened that he'd ever thought of taking her in violence. He ached to run to her, to take her into his arms, and comfort her. But he did none of those things.
"Can I get you a drunk?" He slurred.
"You've been drinking," she spat.
"Your powers of observation are asstounding, look out Potter's rubbing off on you. Or wait, is it in you? Congratulations, by the way."
"Sev, don't. Not know."
"You don't get to call me that anymore. Just Snape. Snape will do." He couldn't hear her say the name that only she called him. It would be his undoing.
"Fine! Snape. You know why I'm here." She stated.
"I do."
"Where have they taken them? You have to help me get them back."
"Does Potter know that you are here?"
"No."
"Really?"
"He forbade me to come, okay. He said that he and the Marauders would get them back but I know that they can't. I know that you are my only hope, Sev."
"Snape!" He roared and moved toward her menacingly.
She jerked back. He saw an instant of fear flit across her face. It was supposed to excite him. It didn't it. It hurt him.
He pulled back. "I'd never hurt you, Lily."
"I know. That's why I'm here. I need your help. You have to go to Voldemort, you have to get my parents back."
"It's not that easy, Lily."
"Isn't it?" She looked at him, begging. Then she realized. "Oh my God, they're already dead. Aren't they?"
"It's likely." Severus hung his head.
"But why?" Tears flowed freely down her face dripping onto the rug.
"They are Muggles who gave birth to a witch. The Dark Lord wants to ensure they don't produce another magical being."
"But they were beyond their child producing. . ."
"Not really, Lily, You know that. What if your father had cheated on your mother with a younger woman and by some accident of DNA, they produced a witch or a wizard, another Mudblood."
"Can't have any more of us, can you?"
"The Dark Lord's vision. . ."
"Don't speak to me of your Dark Lord's vision, Severus. Look what he's done to you." Then an unbearable thought occurred to Lily. "Were you there? Did you help him kill my parents?"
"No." He answered. He didn't elaborate. He hoped she'd let it go at that.
"Then how do you know?"
"Another Death Eater was here earlier, asking about my absence at the festivities."
"Festivities? You're speaking about the murder of my parents as if it was some sort of party." She bolted from the chair and came at him.
"It was for the Death Eaters," he grabbed her wrists as she tried to pound them against his chest.
"You're murderers, the lot of you. What happened to you? Where's the boy I loved?"
He pushed her away. "Don't speak to me of love."
"I loved you!" She screamed defiantly.
"I am warning you, Lily!"
"I loved you," she repeated, fire dancing in her irises.
"Mulciber raped your mum. I'm sure they made your dad watch."
Her hand went to her mouth. He watched her stomach roil. He grabbed the plastic bag that the newspaper had come in and thrust it toward her.
When she finished puking, she looked at him, red streaks now radiated from those perfect eyes. He figured more questions about her parents were coming. He could field those. Be cold. Anything as long as she quit saying that she'd loved him. Because if she'd ever loved him it meant that he'd done something wrong. Lost her somehow.
Her next question took him by complete surprise.
"Do you do that? Rape women?"
How did he answer? No, he'd never taken a woman against her will. It wasn't something that particularly appealed to him. His lust was for one woman alone. How did he tell her that the only woman he'd dreamed of taking was her. And why the hell did she care, anyway?
She crept toward him. "Severus Snape, you answer me, right now. Do you sexually torture and violate women and then kill them?"
"No, Alright," he admitted.
"Why not?"
"Because I'm weak, okay," he nearly choked on the admission.
"Weak?" You think that makes you weak?" She shook her head.
"Of course it does," He tried to move away from her.
"You can't commit an atrocious act of violence upon a woman and you think that makes you weak."
He laughed cruelly. "Violence? It isn't the violence, Lily. It's you."
"Me?"
"Yes, you. You who stood here seconds ago professing a past affection."
"Not just affection, Sev. Love."
"Snape," he snapped.
"Sev," she breathed seductively and stroked his cheek ever so softly.
He griped her hand and crushed it to his cheek. "Stop it."
She brought the other hand up and caressed the opposite cheek. "Sev," she whispered as she traced his bottom lip.
"The thought of other women does little for me," he said and grabbed her other hand.
She was too close. His body was starting to respond. He let go of her hands and moved to the fireplace.
"You're still in love with me, too?" She asked.
"Too?" He stared into the fire.
"I said I loved you but the truth is, I never quit."
"Don't Lily, you're marrying Potter. Of all the people."
"I only started dating him to get your attention. I knew it would hurt you. I hoped you'd be jealous enough that you'd direct your energy into winning me back and leave the Death Eaters alone."
"The road to Hell is paved with good intentions." He wished he had another bottle of whiskey.
"I know now that I failed you. That I should have been honest with you about my feelings but I was terrified of you, Sev."
"Snape!" He rounded on her.
"You'll always be my Sev. And that's why I am going to ask you to do something for me."
"And, if I say no?"
"You'll still be my Sev."
"What do you want, Lily?"
"I want you to get their bodies back for me?"
"Lily, trust me. You don't want to see that."
"They deserve a proper burial. In the churchyard."
"He won't give them up without a price. You don't know him like I do."
"What will he ask?"
"Whatever it is, it will be soul wrenching. I won't let you go through that."
"I need my parents back, Sev. At least take me to him so I can hear his bargain. I'm a grown woman. I can decide for myself what is soul wrenching."
Severus held his hand to his beloved and the duo disapparated from Spinner's End.
The dark manor loomed over meticulously groomed gardens. Snape waited with Lily at the front iron gate.
"There's no guard or call box," Lily didn't understand how they were supposed to get into the estate. She was certain it was protected with spells.
Then suddenly the gate opened seeming on its own.
The walked up the cobblestone drive to the front door. Before they reached the first step, the door opened and Voldemort stood there waiting.
"Evening, Severus. Didn't expect to see you so late." Then looking at Lily, "But, you've brought a toy."
"Lord," Snape controlled his breathing. "Miss Evans would like a word."
"And you brought her, like a lapdog, like a very good little lapdog."
Severus' cheeks couldn't have burned more if Voldemort had slapped him.
Voldemort paid no more attention to Snape, instead he directed his gaze to Lily. "I would invite you in, Miss Evans, but you see we've just had a party and we made quite a mess."
Snape saw her jaw twitching and worried for an instant that she might lash out which would have been a grave mistake. "You've killed my parents, your little jokes aren't likely to hurt me as much."
Something like approval flashed in Voldemort's eyes. Maybe even desire. Snape didn't care for it, either way.
"What is it that you wanted to say, Miss Evans, or is it Mrs. Potter, yet?" Voldemort smiled maliciously in Snape's direction.
"Lily Evans," Lily answered.
"Ahh, Severus, there is hope, yet." Voldemort taunted.
"Cut the crap," Lily fumed.
"Oh how sweet, still protecting you, Sev, That is what she calls you, isn't it? At least when you beat off and think about her riding you, that's the name that drips from her filthy lips."
Snape didn't dare challenge the Dark Lord.
"I came for my parents," Lily demanded but then her body went rigid.
Snape looked to Voldemort then back to Lily. He realized that the Dark Lord was probing her mind, looking for her weaknesses.
"Please," Snape finally found some courage, "Let he be. There's not need to. . ."
"To what, Severus? Hurt her?" Voldemort released the mental hold on Lily. "What were you saying, Mrs. Evans?"
"I came for my parents."
"Oh yes. Funny you've never come for James Potter. Why is that? Why does that plague you so, my sweet? Is it because of your feelings for this one, here?" He pointed his skinny finger at Snape. "You'll be happy to know, Snape that you and Miss Evans are sleeping together but quite alone. She dreams of you taking her, ripping her from his arms and taking her in their bed. Quite a nasty little whore this one is."
Snape moved toward him.
"You'll want to rethink that," Voldemort pointed his wand at Snape. Snape froze. Without lowering his wand, Voldemort studied Lily.
"You've got courage to a fault. No wonder you ended up in Gryffindor. Hmmmm, I sense that there is little I could demand that you wouldn't do. Of course, I could force you to bend over and let Mulciber violate that little pink ass of yours. If for no other reason that to punish Severus for his disloyalty in bringing you here."
Lily didn't even blink, but Snape's heart was thudding so hard he thought his ears would explode. He wouldn't be able to sit and watch Mulciber take her. He'd kill them all or die trying. Hell, he'd kill her before he'd let that beast touch her.
"No, I think I've got it," wickedness split across Voldemort's face.
"Yes?" Lily knew this was it. The moment of truth. He was going to make her an offer.
"I'll give you back their bodies, if you give up your womb."
"I'm sorry," Lily blinked.
"You're going to be a young bride. More than that, you're a Mudblood who is going to marry a Pureblood. Your progeny will weaken the Potter line. You can have your parents back in return for me cursing your womb."
It was too much, Snape thought. Lily deserved to have children. She would be a loving mother. The kind of mother every child deserved. The kind of mother who would give anything, do anything for her child. The kind of mother who would never let an abusive father lay his hands on her child.
"Fine," she agreed, "if that's your price, I'll pay it."
Voldemort moved his wand from Snape to Lily and called, "Sterilis."
LIly felt a warmth radiate across her abdomen. She placed her hand across her center. Voldemort smiled in satisfaction. "Severus, you'll find their bodies in the Main Hall. Take them where she pleases. Get this Mudblood out of here."
"Yes, My Lord," Snape called and hurried to have the whole thing over.
Hours later, after they'd dealt with the morgue at Cokeworth and Lily had made funerary arrangements, They sat together in Snape's sitting room sharing some elven wine, Lily on the couch, Severus in the armchair.
"Come sit with me," she patted the couch.
"I don't think that's a good idea, Lily."
She stood up and walked over to him. "Then, I'll sit with you," she whispered as she sat in his lap.
"Are you in love, with Potter?" He had to know.
"I've grown to love him, Sev. But, I'll always be in love with you."
"I've lost you though?"
"Sev, I don't know how you associate. You're not like him, you're not like any of them."
"What makes you say that?"
"Because of tonight."
"That was all you. You're the one who stood up to him." Severus protested.
"Yes, but you are the one who cast that non-verbal counter curse protecting my womb."
"How did you know?"
"I felt your love like a protective embrace?"
"Do you think he knows?" Snape asked, terrified.
"No, Love is something he doesn't understand. He never will. And that is what will eventually be his undoing."
"He's going to kill me when he finds out."
"No, he'll think it's something I did. He doesn't think you have it in you to stand up to him. He underestimates you. You're stronger than even you now."
"Lily," Severus ran his hand through her hair. "You know you are tormenting me, right now, don't you?"
"Well, I asked you to join me on the couch." She reached down and took his mouth with hers.
"I didn't think you meant that," he whispered when she broke the kiss.
"Once more, Sev. Show me the love that you hide away. Give me the best of you."
Severus picked her up and carried her lovingly to the couch.