AN: I read a Q/A session with Cassandra Clare a few days ago and she said Magnus does forgive Alec for what he did, but that doesn't mean they are any closer at getting back together, also I guess Alec and Magnus will be in Idris together, so I decided to write another possible way those two could get back together.
Also the death of Izzy and his parents, I have no clue if they do die, I'm just going with my gut.
Anyway enjoy
Alec knew walking around Idris was a bad idea, especially at night, but the way he was feeling right now, the teen could care less. Finding a small group of trees, away from everything and everyone, Alec threw himself on the ground and closed his eyes, hoping his dreams would take him back to a much happier time. Letting his mind wander, he thought about the rich spices of India and the bright colors of Paris. Strong arms holding him, protecting him, while he slept and of soft kisses waking him up. Quiet sounds of love and passion invading his senses. Everything about those times in his life, made him feel whole and a person….until now.
Yes Magnus forgave him, but knowing that it still didn't mean anything, broke the shadow hunter in half, and he couldn't stand it.
Alec hated the fact that Clary was able to cry and feel scared, because she had Jace to hold her and tell her everything was going to be ok….Alec didn't have that, because Alec had to screw all that up.
Lost in his own surroundings, he didn't hear someone approach him, until the soft voice of his past broke into his consciousness.
" What are you doing out here by yourself?"
Opening his eyes, Alec jumped up and quickly wiped away some tears, that started to form.
" I couldn't sleep, so I decided to take a walk."
Noticing the man was shivering, Magnus snapped a finger and a blanket appeared in his hands.
" Here….you look cold."
Smiling a little, Alec took the blanket and wrapped it around his shoulders.
" What are you doing out here anyway?"
" All these talks gave me a headache, so I wanted to get some air, then I saw you walking around, and I wanted to make sure you were ok….so are you ok?"
" Give me a few minutes then I'll be able to give you a straight answer."
Underneath the echoes
Buried in the shadows
There you were
Drawn into your mystery
I was just beginning
To see your ghost
But you must know
" Do you remember the last time we were here?"
Sending out a silent plea to his ex, hoping they were not going to have this conversation, Alec saw the curiosity in the warlocks eyes, so he sighed and nodded his head.
Taking the sigh, the wrong way, Magnus felt his chest tighten, was he softly whispered.
" You probably regret what happened then huh?"
Turning his head so fast, both men were afraid of whiplash.
" What?"
This time, it was Magnus's turn to blink back the tears.
" After everything that happened between us, you probably regret that day."
Watching the wind blow along the trees, Alec gave a small sad smile.
" I've done so much in my life that brought out regret, but showing you and everyone around us just how much I love….loved you is something I will never regret."
" Good. I don't regret it either."
Letting a few moments of comfortable silence wash over them, Magnus was finally able to take a good look at the shadow hunter. The first thing he noticed was the dark circles under Alec's eyes. They were so heavy against his pale skin, it looked like he was in a fight and got punched in both eyes.
The second thing that caught his eye was the baggy clothes.
Alec was always thin, but now he looked like an unhealthy thin.
" Probably from loosing both his parents and Izzy." The warlock thought. Though speaking of the subject.
" I heard about you sister and parents….I am sorry."
His breath hitching, Alec gave the warlock a wet smile.
" Thank you."
I'll be here waiting
Hoping praying
That the sky will guide you home
When your feeling lost
I'll leave my love
Hidden in the sun
From when the darkness comes
Looking up at the starry sky, Alec felt his chin tremble as the hot tears finally overflowed. He cried for his siblings, he cried for Simon, who was mourning the death of his sister, but mostly he cried for Magnus. Magnus….who was going to stand by and watch his friends fall one by one….who was still, even after everything that happened, the keeper of his heart and soul.
" Alec…."
Hearing the worry in the warlocks voice, he turned his head and gasped when he saw the look of concern on Magnus's face and eyes. Continuing to look into those eyes, Alec took a deep breath, and began.
" I don't know what's going to happen tonight, I don't know what's going to happen tomorrow….hell I don't even know what's going to happen an hour from now, so just in case something does happen…..I want you to know the truth…..I need you to know the truth. I was never going to take away your immortality, because that would be changing the person I loved and…..and I could never do that to you, but yes I did continue to see Camille…..because she knew everything about you and I didn't."
Hearing Alec sobbing, broke the warlock in half because he knew it was his fault. Magnus wanted his past to stay in the past, but by doing that, he hurt the one person who loved him. Hating to see Alec looking so lost and vulnerable, the warlock wanted nothing more than to scoop up the shadow hunter in his arms, kiss him senseless, and never let him go, but deep down he knew he couldn't do that. Deep down, Magnus Bane knew he had to let Alexander Lightwood go.
Now the door is opened
The world I knew is broken
There's no return
Now my heart is not scared
Just knowing that you're out there
Watching me
So believe
_Sensing the teen was starting to calm down, the warlock started to open his mouth, but immediately closed it when Alec continued.
" You knew everything about me, while I felt cheated because other than your love for glitter, I knew nothing else, and even though it hurt like hell, I went to the one person who did know it and that was Camille. I knew going to see her was a stupid idea, but I wanted to know when you first got to New York or what your favorite decade was…but even if I did find any of that out, it wouldn't have mattered because I still would have lost you in the end.
Magnus…..if I could turn back time and fix everything I did and say everything I should have said I would do it….in a heartbeat….if it means at the end of all this we could be together, but since I can't I'm going to say everything now….I love you….I loved you every single day we were together and I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I know this is a little late, but the night you asked me if I would search for you if you ever went missing….well I would….I would move heaven on earth for you….and if it came down to it I would die for you, because a life without you in it is no life at all."
Fully turning around, Alec walked over to the warlock and with silent tears rolling off his eyes, he softly whispered.
" Please don't hate me for this."
Then leaning forward, Alec pressed a small kiss onto the warlocks lips.
I'll be here waiting
Hoping, praying
That this light will guide you home
When your feeling lost I'll leave my love
Hidden in the sun
For when the darkness comes
_Moving back slowly, the shadow hunter gave the warlock a watery smile, before turning around, but before he could walk anywhere else, Magnus grabbed his wrist and turned him back around,
" That's not good enough."
" What is?"
But instead of answering, Magnus, gently lowered the younger man onto the ground and started giving him small butterfly kisses all over his face. He kissed away the tears, he kissed away the dark circles….from the start of Alec's forehead to the bottom of his chin, there wasn't one spot that the warlock didn't kiss.
Then when he was finished with his face, Magnus brought his lips to the shadow hunters shoulders and kissed all down both arms then took Alec's hands and brought them to his lips and kissed them as well.
Once he was satisfied, Magnus leaned over Alec once again and smiled at the sparkling blue eyes looking at him.
" What…..what was that for?"
" Call it reassurance."
" For what?"
Now it was Magnus's turn to start crying. He knew deep down he shouldn't ask for such a request since he was the one who ended things, but he had to make sure Alec would survive….no he needed to make sure Alec survived.
" No matter what happens an hour from now, tonight, or tomorrow…..you'll come back to me."
Bringing his hand, to the warlocks cheek, Alec wiped away the stray tear.
" I'll always come back to you."
Be here waiting, hoping, praying
That this light will guide you home
When your feeling lost
I'll leave my love, hidden in the sun
For when the darkness comes