Never Noticed Till Now

by SRN713

For years, she kept her emotions hidden from her best friend. She never knew how to express them, yet fear his rejection. His love for fighting was much too great, and she felt that her feelings for him would mean nothing at all. She always felt unnoticed despite having known him since childhood. That is, until now. [IkkakuOC; ON HIATUS TEMPORARILY]

General POV

"Admit it..."

"A-admit what?"

"Admit that you like him."

"…W-who?"

"Don't play dumb with me, Murakami. Now say it."

"I-I don't know what you're talking about…"

"You know very well what I'm talking about. Just admit it and I will stop pestering you."

Yukiya Murakami's blush intensified further than before, giving her pale skin a very noticeable crimson color, as Yumichika Ayasegawa continued to try and pry out the answers he wanted to get out of his pupiless eyed, female friend. The two had been talking about a very specific subject for a little over a half an hour now, yet it was not getting very far from what the narcissist saw. It was subject that the shy black haired girl herself did not wish to bring up and talk about; it was due to her embarrassment and inability to accept such a ridiculous accusation. Yumichika may have been one of her best friends, but that did not mean she could tell him all the things he wanted to know by asking – more or less demanding it – her. It was bringing her out of her comfort zone and doing so was probably the most embarrassing for her. She was not the type to tell her secrets to just anyone, even if that "anyone" was her friend of many years. The subject was too embarrassing to speak of, and she wanted to drop the whole thing. She did not want to focus on it too much or something would happen, something she wanted to avoid completely. Unfortunately, Yumichika was not as sympathetic.

He refused to allow the subject to be dropped so easily; he was not going to let Yukiya walk away with a fact that he knew was true beyond all possible reason. He knew that Yukiya had strong feelings for someone they both knew too well, but she just did not want to talk or even think about it anymore. She was too shy to speak of it, for starters, and she feared the worst of the situation. That was the only reason that kept him going. He wanted to break her out of that comfort zone and help her gain some confidence. He wanted her to realize that bad things were going to happen, but holding something as important as her feelings was just as dangerous. Keeping them inside would only torture the poor girl, and he never wanted to see his best friend placed in that situation. However, at the same time, Yukiya was just being a bit stubborn, skirting around the matter in an attempt to drop it altogether. Yumichika could tell by her posture; her head turned away in a direction that was not his, a fist full of her torn grey dress, and her thin fingers curled up near her lips. That was the universal sign of shyness and embarrassment, and that was a habit Yumichika planned to break.

A sigh escaped the narcissistic man's lips as Yukiya started fiddling with her short raven colored hair, watching herself walk as she began pacing back and forth.

"You're going to have to admit it sooner or later, Yukiya." Yumichika told her, crossing his arms over his chest. He eyed her with a small smirk on his face while his long black hair brushed lightly against his kimono.

Yukiya stopped walking and looked at him, her face flushed with a shade of red that matched the color of blood. Her pupiless eyes were filled with nervousness and embarrassment. It made them stand out against the red that colored her face.

"I-I don't have to admit anything," she told him, stuttering a bit as her face continued to grow darker. "My feelings for a man do not concern you."

"They concern me if I know that man…" He said. She looked away, attempting to suppress the blush that covered her face and made her face burn.

"Even then," she muttered, eyes shifting away from him. "Just because you and I both know him doesn't mean I should say anything."

"Are you scared of the reaction?" He questioned. She remained silent, the grip on her grey dress tightening a little, and she shrunk away from him. It was enough of an answer for Yumichika. "My dear, you're only hurting yourself in the end. You won't find how he feels unless you tell him."

"Tell who what?"

Yukiya's eyes immediately went towards the direction in front of her, widening with surprise and shock before quickly looking at the ground. Now, she began fiddling with her fingers in an attempt to keep herself occupied. Her face grew hotter as she sensed a smirk from Yumichika grow ever so slightly.

"I-i-it's nothing to worry about, Ikkaku." She quickly spoke before Yumichika could say even a single word, her face flushing more at the simple thought of him mentioning anything about what they were talking about. "Yumichika and I were just…talking. No big deal."

To clarify things a little on what was going on, the fact that Yumichika was trying to prove to the girl was that Yukiya Murakami had fallen for Ikkaku Madarame, her best friend whom she had known much longer than the narcissist. Unfortunately for him, Yukiya continued to push the fact out of her mind as she had been doing before. She thought it was not true, claiming that they were only friends and nothing more than that. The two met while Yukiya was wandering around the streets of her home in the seventy-seventh district of Rukon. According to her, she saw him beating up a bunch of kids that decided to pick a fight with him. Curious (and a little worried for Ikkaku's safety), she decided to stick around in the distance. Ikkaku came out to be the victor in the end, laughing as the other kids fled the scene with their tails between their legs. After the fight, Yukiya offered to help him with his injuries that he received in the fight. However, the stubborn young Ikkaku did not want it, claiming that they would heal with time. Insisting that he needed a little help, she ignored his refusal, took his hand, and brought him back to her home. Even though he refused her help at first, he decided to let her do as she pleased and help her out. Eventually, he told her his name, to which she responded with a smile and a response: her own name.

It was after that day that the two became inseparable friends, rarely leaving one another's side for even a moment. Even though Yukiya was not as much of a fight-loving lunatic like Ikkaku, it did not mean that she could not help him with his wounds after the battle. Since she became friends with him, she started spending more time with him, leaving home and not returning for hours on end. She still saw her parents, but they soon started to notice problems that arose. She realized her parents were upset over the fact that Yukiya was spending way too much time with Ikkaku, claiming he was a bad influence on her innocent mind. When they talked to her, they told her that she was no longer aloud to see him, only wanting to protect her. Unfortunately, she did not see it that way. She felt as if they did not understand him the way she did; they did not understand that he was good at heart and just enjoyed fighting. After a long and heated argument, her father told her that if she went to see him again that she should not come back, to which her mother scolded him immediately. Unfortunately, it was too late to take his words back and keep them from scaring his only daughter.

The next day, her parents went to her room in order to apologize to her for what they said, but soon came to find that much of her stuff was gone along with the girl in question. Unbeknownst to them, she packed her things last night, leaving behind pictures of her parents and anything that would remind her of them, and ran away to find Ikkaku. She did not leave a note behind, she left nothing out of place - the exception being her parent's gifts and mementos - and she did not say goodbye to either of them. Since then, she has not thought about returning home, no longer wishing to see them as she was no longer welcomed.

Five years later, the two hit their teenage years and by then had traveled to many of the districts. While wandering one of through one of them in the early afternoon, Yukiya came across a much younger Yumichika; he was sitting in an abandoned warehouse all by himself. Feeling utterly sorry and worried for him, she decided to help him and ask if he wanted to join them in Ikkaku's hunt for fighting. Ikkaku refused the idea rather harshly. He claimed that he just wanted it to be himself, Yukiya, and no one else. However, she convinced Ikkaku to allow the soon-to-be narcissist into their small group, saying she would not be able to live with herself if she left him there by himself and with no one to call a friend. However, much to Yukiya's surprise, Yumichika did not want to go with them either. He told her that he would be alright by himself and had been for some time. Despite the refusal to go with them, Yukiya chose against leaving him, referring back to her comment about leaving him alone, and went with what her heart told her to do. She pulled him up from the dirt, cleaning his face a little, and brought him along with her and Ikkaku.

The first couple of weeks were rather awkward at first after the addition to their group. Ikkaku completely ignored the new member of the group, while Yumichika remained quiet and kept to himself most of the time, almost as if he did not want to be there. Yukiya, wanting to make Yumichika feel more welcomed, talked to him to keep him occupied and learn something about him. They had some good conversations, but when she tried to bring Ikkaku into it, it went dead silent and both boys looked away from one another; Ikkaku due to his unaccustomed ways and his inability to deal with a new member, and Yumichika just out of nervousness. That happened for quite some time, but Yukiya did not want to give up hope. However, luck was one her side as one night, when the group of three stopped to rest for the night, Yumichika woke up Yukiya and asked to take a walk with her through the silent neighborhood. After he told her that he could not sleep because something was bothering him, she accepted and silently left the small camp sight, leaving the sleeping Ikkaku to rest. At first, the two were quiet, but after a little while Yumichika became the one to start conversation by starting with what was on his mind.

"Does your friend hate me?" He asked in a bit of a shy tone. "I think I upset him."

Shocked to hear his words, Yukiya shook his head.

"Oh no," she replied in an assuring tone of voice. "Ikkaku doesn't hate you. He has no reason to."

His eyes shifted as he said, "He's barely said a word to me ever since I became a part of this group." His tone sounded as if he did something wrong as he stopped walking and lowered his head. "Maybe I should have stayed back in that warehouse."

"Don't say that," she responded, turning to face him and stopping in front of him; she was at least two inches taller than him at the time. "Maybe the reason why he hasn't spoken to you is because he's not used to having anyone else around." Her hand fell on his shoulder, making him look up at her. "He's been so used to just him and I wandering around together, and adding someone else may be a little awkward for him."

"You think so?" He asked, his wisteria colored eyes filled with sadness, but held the hint of a little hope.

She smiled, giving the saddened boy a kind, gentle smile.

"Of course," she said. "I've known Ikkaku for a long time now and know him better than anyone. If you start talking to him, he'll start talking to you. He'll get used to your company and be a little more comfortable. Then, you guys can be friends like him and I are!"

A smile slowly appeared on his face, which surprised Yukiya for just a second. Little Yumichika never smiled for anything until this moment, and Yukiya was half expecting to see him actually do it.

"Thank you, Yukiya." He said, pulling her into a small hug. She returned the hug before leading the way back to the little camp and going back to sleep. "I'll do my best."

After that night, Yumichika finally started talking to Ikkaku. She never actually thought that the two would become friends so easily and so quickly.

Since those days way back when, the three were inseparable friends; for the next couple of years, the three wandered around the many districts of Rukon, Ikkaku picking fights with everyone, while Yumichika and Yukiya talked aimlessly about different topics of interest. After the small ordeal with himself and Yukiya, Yumichika started opening up much more than he did before, complimenting on how pretty or how beautiful Yukiya looked that day. Yukiya simply thanked him for his compliments, while Ikkaku, once it started to become more and more constant, started getting a little annoyed over the fact that his narcissist friend was complementing his close friend - who just so happened to be a girl). Taking notice to this annoyance coming from the bald man, Yukiya assured him that Yumichika was just complimenting her and that he did not need to worry about it as much as he was. Trying to take her words into consideration, he did his best to ignore the compliments. Yumichika, however, became a little mischievous as he decided to take it a bit further than that in order to see something.

"Hey, Yukiya," The dark haired man spoke, grabbing her attention immediately as she turned her head in his direction. Since he had gotten older, his voice sounded much more mature and refined than the day he was found; the same thing went for both Yukiya and Ikkaku – well, more for Yukiya than Ikkaku, but both sounded mature for their ages.

"Yes, Yumichika," she answered, a friendly smile written on her face. Since she had grown up, she was growing in all the right places, though she felt a little embarrassed by the fact that her breasts were not that developed as other women in Rukon and she still appeared a little thin – she eventually gave up on that, since there were other, more important things to worry about that the size of her chest and body physique.

Instead of returning the sweet smile, he smirked; he had a plan brewing, and he was putting it into play.

"I really like you, Yukiya, as…more than just a friend." He said rather sweetly, causing Yukiya to widen her eyes and stop in her tracks along with him. Ikkaku also stopped immediately, but did not turn around just yet.

"W…wha?" She questioned, her face flushing a hint of red.

"I think you're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen." Yumichika went on. "I can't really say how long I've felt this way, but I really can't hold it in any longer."

Their bald friend immediately turned one hundred eighty degrees, his face filled with shock and anger as he stared at the narcissist. Yukiya simply stared at Yumichika out of embarrassment and surprise.

"WHAT?" Ikkaku exclaimed, his voice matching his face perfectly.

Yumichika's smirk never seemed to waver.

"That's right," he responded, still staring at Yukiya. "I suppose I've also liked you," It was clear his attention was still on Yukiya, "I just didn't know how to say it without feeling embarrassed."

"What the Hell? You can't like Yukiya!" Ikkaku snapped. Both Yukiya and Yumichika glanced at him; Yukiya was a little surprised at Ikkaku's words now.

"And why is that?" Yumichika questioned. "Is there some kind of law that states I'm not allowed to like my dear friend?"

"In my book, there is!" Ikkaku growled harshly. "She's my best friend, our best friend! You can't like her in that way!"

"Why not?" Yumichika asked coolly. "If there's a reason, then explain."

Ikkaku paused for a moment, his eyes shifting as if trying to find the right answer. Yukiya blinked at his expression; it was filled with anger and what she believed was a hint of jealousy.

"Be…cause…" He started. When he found an answer, he looked at the dark haired man. "Because…it would just make things awkward, okay? It's like you'll be making me a third wheel or…or something!"

At his words, Yumichika closed his eyes for a moment. It did not take him long to speak again, though.

"Ikkaku…?"

"What?"

The narcissist opened his eyes again and looked at his bald friend before saying, "Sorry to say this, but I was only kidding." It was clear he was apologizing to her, but she was much too distracted by Ikkaku's previous reaction to when he thought Yumichika was actually in love with her.

The bald man's eyes widened at first before he glared at him even more than before.

"WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING?!" He shouted furiously. "Is this some kind of game you're trying to play? What were you trying to prove?"

This time, Yumichika chuckled and walked right passed us. His next words surprised us both: "I was trying to prove that you actually liked Yukiya."

Both Ikkaku and Yukiya blushed in unison before turning around and watching Yumichika walk off; both did not notice the color of red on either of their faces.

"What? That's not true at all!" Ikkaku protested, running after his friend with an angered look on his face. "Yukiya and I are just really close friends! Besides, you were screwing around with my head and making it sound like I did!"

Yukiya simply walked after them at a slow pace, her face colored almost completely in a shade of red. Her mind had begun racing after what just happened, trying to piece together what was going through Yumichika's mind before going to Ikkaku's reaction as to why the dark haired man could not be with her. Never in her life as Ikkaku's best friend had she thought about having any real feelings of affection that was not a friend. Since childhood, she always saw him as a good friend of hers that would not do anything that would bring her into harm, and vice versa. Since she could not fight for herself at the time, he decided to fight by himself and make sure that she did not get hurt herself. She saw that as only being a friend when he told her those words, and thought nothing more on the matter. However, now that Yumichika brought up the fact of actually liking someone as more than just a friend, she started seeing Ikkaku in a different perspective. It seemed like everything she knew about him made her feel much more closer to him. Because of that, the desire to get much more closer to him started to overwhelm her entire being, plaguing her thoughts with images of being closer to her bald friend than she ever thought before.

Her blush darkened even more at the thought of getting closer to him. What a ridiculous thought, she told herself.

"Hey, Yukiya!" The voice of her friend broke her chain of thought as he grabbed her attention. "You're falling behind back there! You okay?" She glanced up at him to notice both Ikkaku and Yumichika looking over their shoulders at them to find her far behind them. Hesitating, she quickly nodded, letting them both know that she was alright, before running up to catch them before they got too far.

That was how things started, how Yumichika's plan started to take effect more on Yukiya than it was meant to take on Ikkaku. Over time, he started to notice her acting differently around her best friend of so many years, while at the same time trying to be the same as she once was before the events that had taken place. At first, he thought nothing of it and thought she was going through one of her "phases" that most women went through; he thought it would eventually pass by with time. After a couple months, though, he saw that she was not changing at all to the way she was before he brought up the whole "Ikkaku liking Yukiya" ordeal. Curious, he went straight to her when Ikkaku was away and asked her if she was feeling okay. When she question why he asked, he told her that she had been acting very strange since the day he brought up Ikkaku like her. Immediately, she blushed and denied anything that he thought was going on between them, claiming she was fine and had a lot on her mind. However, that was not what Yumichika wanted her to say. When it started to click in his mind, he smirked at his black haired female friend before saying three simple words; the words that Yukiya thought would live to haunt her for the rest of her days:

"You love Ikkaku."

"You sure it's nothing important?" Ikkaku questioned his pupiless eyed friend as she did her best to try and keep the blush that attempted to appear on her face. "Nothing that I need to worry about?"

Yumichika, already noticing her distress and feeling he had poked at her personal bubble enough for one day, spoke for her by saying, "We're sure, Ikkaku." When Ikkaku looked at him, the narcissist went on. "We were just talking how wonderful I looked in this kimono, but Yukiya thinks I should get a different one."

Yukiya looked over as Yumichika faked a pouty expression towards Ikkaku just before he looked back at her with a confused look.

"U-um, y-yeah!" She quickly spoke, looking back at him while trying to keep from stuttering. "I-I didn't want him bringing up the subject of his kimono to you cause I knew that you would agree with me when I say that he needs to get a more…uh…a more manly kimono!"

Ikkaku stared at her for a long moment, staring into her eyes and making a light hint of red form on her face, before looking back Yumichika. After a second, he looked back at her and chuckled before patting her shoulder. The gesture made her tense up a bit, since she was still looking in his eyes when he did.

"Good thing you mentioned it anyway," he spoke before walking off, "cause I was going to agree with you anyway."

Yumichika's jaw dropped while Yukiya blushed even more than before.

"I don't need to get a manlier kimono!" He complained. "I happen to like this one a lot!"

Ikkaku turned his head towards his friend.

"It has flowers on it, for God's sake..." He said, making Yumichika glare at him while he looked back ahead. "That's as girly as it's ever gonna get." Yumichika huffed at his comment, pushing the fact that Ikkaku possibly called him unmanly as he noticed Yukiya standing there quietly. Her face turned red from when Ikkaku placed a hand on her shoulder, feeling tenser than before. Her breath was caught in her throat for about a few more seconds, before she let out a sigh. A smirk appeared on Yumichika's face as he walked over and stood behind her, leaning down slightly since he was now slightly taller than her.

"Looks like someone seemed to enjoy that little moment," he said, making her jump and turn her head to look at him. She looked away before turning around and walking passed him. She did not say anything to him, which confused him for just a moment. She was too busy in her own little world.

She felt something when she looked into his eyes, even though his mind was on a different subject and was thinking about something. She did not know what it was, but the moment Ikkaku placed his hand on her shoulder, when he looked in her eyes; something sparked through her body. A jolt of electricity was sent through, causing her to shiver. It started to bug her when she thought about it, almost to a point where she wanted to just scream out loud for an answer as to what it was. For some reason, she wanted it to happen again. Not just him placing a hand on her shoulder or look into her eyes, but maybe something more than that, like a hug. At that thought, her face heated up more than before and she placed a hand on her face. The thought of actually hugging him now became the desire to just throw her arms around her bald and get what she wanted; maybe even something more than just a simple hug. However, if she did that out of the blue, he would start to think that she lost it. In her opinion, she already lost it since the day Yumichika made that comment about him liking her. Suddenly, she remembered the three words from her narcissistic friend would come back to haunt her. How they suddenly came back to her, she never knew. For a while, she thought that she had finally gotten rid of them, wanting to forget such a ridiculous idea, only to come flying right back into the mind that rejected it.

She was hoping that it was not true.

Night arrived faster than any of the three expected, and they decided to call it a night. They stopped by one of the districts old abandoned home and decided to stay there till morning to keep traveling. Fortunately, and much to their convenience, there were three bedrooms, one for each. Although it was nice to have their own rooms to rest in, Yukiya did not feel as tired as she wanted to be. Instead, she was still up thinking about the words that would not leave her mind since they came back to her at full force. She sat on her bed, staring at the full moon that shined down onto her somewhat pale colored skin. Her mind was filled with different thoughts, everyone of them including her closest friend Ikkaku Madarame. It continued to swirl around in her mind, never wanting to leave until it was carved into her mind permanently. It wanted to be in a state where it will never be able to escape. After a while, despite her attempts to forget, it was successful, bringing her to one simply realization. Her eyes widened with shock and surprise as she started to stare into space, repeating the revelation over and over in her head. As much as she did not want to admit it, the thought made me sigh in defeat. Cursing under her breath, she realized just what exactly she had to do, even if she did not want to do it.

Slowly, she got up out of bed and exited her room. After a few seconds, she came to Yumichika's bedroom door and knocked on it. Distractedly, she did not even wait for him to open the door; she entered the room anyway, her face stuck staring at the floor in shame. She shut the door behind her softly so as to not wake up Ikkaku in the other room, and immediately sensed Yumichika's gaze at her.

"Yukiya, what are doing up?" He questioned as she leaned against the door. She did not respond to his words; she simply continued staring at the floor like she did not hear him. He noticed this and started to get worried. "Yukiya?" He tried to get her attention, removing the covers and moving to sit on his bed. "Yukiya, are you alright? What's wrong?"

Instead of answering his questions of worry, Yukiya slowly made her way over to sit next to him, still staring at the ground in front of her. For a long moment, it remained quiet between the both of them. He waited for her to say something, but she said nothing at all. She did not want him to worry about her so much, but she felt so stupid for not accepting the answers that were right in front of her face. After another moment of complete silence, Yukiya sighed shakily before speaking just three simple words; three simple words that changed her from that moment on.

"You were right..."

Yumichika stared at her for a long moment with a confused look, before realization struck him. A smirk slowly appeared on his lips as he slowly pulled her into a hug.

"I know I am..." He said as she slowly hugged back, "but you should've admitted the fact that you loved Ikkaku the day I even mentioned it, not torture yourself like this. It's not a very beautiful thing to do, you know..."