Author's notes: A short fic I wrote for my friend Rodella's birthday last week. :D
Ichigo was about as bored as he had ever been in his life. There was only so much time you could spend interpreting sine waves before you found yourself wishing for another round of the World's Worst Family Reunion Ever in the form of a second invasion of a supposedly-extinct race to liven things up a bit, and, having long reached that threshold, Ichigo had decided to waste some time perusing Facebook.
It was almost as dull as the maths. Scrolling through Chad's photographs of fluffy kittens, Karin's attempt to round up a football team, and the news that Orihime and Uryu were dating failed to capture Ichigo's attention any more than his homework.
Wait.
Ichigo did a double-take, fairly certain that he had imagined it. Ignoring Renji's inane status lamenting the catching of his scarf on a thorn, he scrolled back up to a photograph of his classmates smiling through the screen, Orihime's arms around Uryu's torso as he rested his head against hers. Both of them were smiling.
Uryu Ishida and Orihime Inoue are in a relationship, the screen declared.
Right. So he hadn't been imagining it.
Ichigo picked up a pencil from his desk and lobbed it in the direction of his wardrobe door, which it struck with a CLINK before falling to the carpeted floor. "Oi, Rukia!"
The door slid open and Rukia poked her head out, the scowl on her face informing Ichigo that he had interrupted her at a particularly tense moment in her manga. "What is it, Ichigo?"
Ichigo pointed to the monitor, from which Orihime beamed and even the infamously-grumpy Uryu's expression radiated content. "Did you know about this?"
Rukia dropped her tankobon and her thunderous expression cleared, only to be replaced by a smirk. "You mean you didn't? Read me the comments."
He scrolled down, his eyebrows drawn together in their usual scowl. "Fine. 'It's been a long time coming, I'm happy for you.', that one's Chad, 'why did she have to be straight?!', Chizuru... 'Let me know if he does anything untoward and I'll beat him up for you, Orihime'" Ichigo shuddered. "That would be Tatsuki."
"Huh," came Rukia's voice, from right behind him. Evidently she had sneaked up when he was distracted. "There are fewer comments than I'd have expected. Figures, this has only been up for ten minutes, so not too many people could have seen it. I'll just have to add my own comment to the conversation."
Ichigo watched blankly as she leaned over his shoulder, quickly typed out a message, and hit the return key.
ORIHIME IS HE A GOOD KISSER? read the screen, next to Ichigo's profile picture. He rolled his eyes; typical, nosy Rukia.
And then he realised.
"That's my account!" he exclaimed, scrambling to delete the message. However, just before he could, the notifications started rolling in.
Yuzu Kurosaki liked your comment.
Rangiku Matsumoto liked your comment.
Keigo Asano replied to your comment: Well, Orihime? Is he?
Rukia's grin widened, exposing her incisors. "Come on, Ichigo. Don't you want to know?"
"Not especially," he grumbled, logging off and opening his maths textbook to a random page. "This is why I never use Facebook."
Rukia stalked back to her cupboard. "Fine, be boring," she muttered, picking her manga back up and slamming the door. "Let me know what she says," she added, as an afterthought, her voice muffled by the wooden panel.
"I'm deleting my account in the morning," he fired back, picking up a pen and returning to his graphs.