*Disclamer: I do not own avatar the last airbender, or any characters from the series*

She sees him in the fireplace.

Every night, as dawn falls outside her window and silence echoes throughout her house, she sees him. Flaming eyes, tangerine lips, and his scar, alight and yet so dim compared to the rest of him.

She remembers him as a teenager, lost and confused and so angry, just like those red-hot flames that flicker in front of her. She remembers him all in black, running with her as they chased the man of her nightmares. She remembers him so at peace, so content with himself; and then, he was gone, pulled away from her just at the brink of something.

He had been crowned Firelord at such a young age - too young. Too young to know what he wanted, and yet, too old to be naive. Because he may not of wanted all the responsibility, all the power, but he knew damn well that he didn't have a choice.

He could have been aching to be fire lord for all she knew; he never told her one way or the other. But there was something about the look in his eyes when he went out to be crowned, full of pride and joy and peace, but full of something else too, something she couldn't quite put her finger on, or maybe just didn't want to put her finger on.

Looking back on it now, she probably just imagined it - she always did have a tendency to overanalyse things concerning him.

Just like she overanalysed the kiss that they shared.

It was just a kiss, nothing more. And yet, the fire on her tongue and the sound of heart-beats pounding in her head and the way she was so overwhelmed that she needed to grip his waist to stay steady made her doubt whether it was just a kiss. It was the way that she leant in slightly more than needed in order to inhale his scent, a strange mix of freesia and burning wood that she can still smell to this very day, or the way that she can still remember the faint taste of his lips 50 years later, or the way that she felt such a strong want for his lips to be on hers after the event, not in the way of i could do that again as she had felt with Aang, but in the way of not being able to take her mind off it for days afterwards, of longing for the feeling in her chest when his lips touched hers, that made her think that there was more between herself and Zuko than she had previously thought.

And that scared her. It scared her the night of the kiss, and it still scares her decades later. Because she has been widowed for over 20 years, has had three children with her husband, has lived out so much of her life with him, yet the fireplace that she gazes into every single night still reminds her of the man she kissed in her early twenties, and scarcely saw afterwards.

She isn't sure whether she sees him in the fireplace because she watches it every night, or watches it every night because she sees him in it. She isn't even sure that she really wants to know.

She doubts that he ever had feelings for her, although she's not certain if she really thinks that, or if she just says it so she does not dwell on it even more.

It shouldn't matter either way; he wouldn't have been able to marry her years ago, having been married very early in his reign, and now... well, she isn't supposed to think about now. Besides, he never have feelings for her anyway. She is sure of that.

And yet, she isn't sure. Because he was the one who initiated the kiss, he was the one who ran his fingers through her hair when she gripped his waist, and he was the one who simply stared at her afterwards, waiting for her reaction so he could act the same. And, as she said before, it shouldn't matter whether he really ever did have feelings for her or not, because she cannot change her past, but it does matter. It matters every night that she sits here, soaking in her thoughts and gazing at the fire.

Sometimes, as her eyes meld with the bright flames in front of her, she wonders if he ever watches the water and thinks about her.

She doesn't like to admit it, but deep down, she hopes that he does.

A/N: OH GOD SO IVE BASICALLY LEFT THE AVATAR FANDOM BUT I WAS READING MY OLD ONE-SHOTS AT 4AM LAST NIGHT AND I REALISED I KINDA MISS THIS A LOT AND THEN I SAW THAT IT IS ZUTARA MONTH ON TUMBLR SO I WROTE THIS AT 4AM LAST NIGHT (ITS PROBABLY TERRIBLE BECAUSE OF THAT + I DIDNT PROOF-READ IT) BUT YEAH I HOPE YOU ENJOYED! Should I write more zutara and get back into the avatar fandom?