A/N: This is from the AU that Howard Moon's Guide to Being Classy takes place in. And this happened sometime between the 3rd and 4th chapters of that fic. Because apparently I can't leave this universe alone.
Disclaimer: The Boosh isn't mine. Aww.
This is approximately the third time Vince has gone to see Naboo in the past week. Maybe the fourth time; minor embarrassment has caused Vince to stop keeping track. It's getting a bit ridiculous, but Vince has to do something.
"All right, Naboo," Vince says. He's standing in front of the window, and Naboo's back is facing him. Vince hasn't done anything wrong; Naboo started off that way.
"Vince," Naboo says without turning around, "is this about Howard?"
"No!" Vince shouts. "It's a…general inquiry. Why does it matter?"
"I'm not gonna help you if you're gonna yell at me. Actually, I may not help you at all."
"Sorry!" Vince cries. "I'm just a bit flustered, yeah? You know."
"I don't. Come in," Naboo says.
Vince sits down on the couch in the small room. He's feeling a bit twitchy today.
"So," Naboo says, finally facing Vince, "what's happened now?"
"I dunno, Naboo, that's the problem! You've gotta help me, please!"
"There's nothing to do," Naboo says. "These things take time."
"Don't you have a love potion or something?" Vince cries. He's dangerously close to tugging on his hair in frustration. Don't do it. Not worth it.
"Look, you ballbag, would you really want him to love you back only because you slipped something in his drink? God, I can't believe I'm actually discussing this," Naboo says.
"I think he may…you know…but I don't know. It's just—" Vince cuts himself short. "Look, I'm sorry, Naboo, I'm being a right idiot about this. I'll just wait. That's a good plan, yeah?"
"Whatever," Naboo says.
"Right." Vince stands up, carefully smoothes out his hair, and makes a quick exit.
Naboo turns back to the window as Vince is walking past. "You'll be back tomorrow, yeah?" he says.
Vince pauses and kicks a bit of dirt with his boot. "Yeah, probably," he admits, and then he turns around, walking back much faster than is strictly necessary.