Supernatural pre-series AU. This is a one-shot that happens after the boys and John escape the fire that took Mary. No slash. *There might be a sequel to this later on, if anyone's interested.
Disclaimer: Supernatural is not mine.
A/N: This story is a re-write from a fanfic I did, years ago. I didn't like how it was at all, so I decided to re-write it. I hope you enjoy!
Some information in this story is accurate that I found on some studies for the effect of second-hand smoke on a baby's lungs, however other pieces I needed to 'tweak' in order for it to fit in this story. I am not a doctor, so please don't take any information in this story as complete facts.
Smoke
The next few moments were a blur to Dean. Firefighters arrived at the house and got to work putting the fire out. Dean sat beside his Daddy on the Impala's hood, with Sammy laying in Daddy's lap. Dean could hear a couple of firemen talking with policemen close by, saying that it was strange how the fire wasn't spreading to other parts of the house, it seemed to stay in the nursery and that it wasn't slowing down. Dean didn't know what they meant, but when he tried to ask his Daddy, he was told not to worry about it, that the firemen would handle it. The four-year-old kept seeing their neighbors being repeatedly pushed back by policemen, told to get back up on the curb, as they tried to get closer, to see what was going on. While his Daddy was cradling his little brother, Dean leaned against him and tried to processed what had happened tonight.
Flashback
Dean was jerked awake by a scream. He sat up in bed and heard his Daddy yell out his Mommy's name. 'What is happening?' he thought sleepily, 'Why is Daddy yelling for Mommy?' Next, he heard thundering footsteps on the stairs outside in the hallway. It sounded like his Daddy had ran into Sammy's room, and then it was quiet again, so Dean figured it was another "Sammy emergency" that Mommy and Daddy always carried on about when his little brother would either throw up or have a tummy ache and "explode" as his Mommy liked to call it, requiring both of them to bathe his little brother and change him into fresh clothes. Dean settled back down into his bed and was just about ready to fall back asleep when he heard his Daddy yell out his Mommy's name and then Sammy let out a high-pitched squeal and started crying.
Just as he heard his father's strangled shout, a heat enveloped him in his bed, circling around him, making it difficult to breathe. He had never felt heat like this before, it seemed to lick at his skin. What was happening…how did it get so hot all of a sudden?
Dean got out of his bed, tripping slightly over one of his toys but was able to catch himself and stumbled out of his room. He walked closer to Sammy's room, careful not to make any noise, and saw his Daddy emerge from the room with his baby brother in his arms. "Daddy?!"
Seeing his oldest in the hallway, John thrust the baby into his brother's arms. "Take your brother outside as fast as you can! Don't look back!" When his son hesitated, he ordered in a voice that the four-year-old knew not to argue with. "Now Dean, go!"
Dean turned and ran, trying to keep a good hold on his crying brother to make sure that he didn't drop him. The four-year-old slowed down when he reached the stairs, going down the steps as carefully as he could, Sam still crying in his ear. He had to adjust Sam from sliding out of his grip a couple of times, otherwise the baby would make them both fall down the stairs from all of his squirming. Reaching the bottom, Dean picked up his speed and opened the door as best he could with Sam still in his arms. Readjusting his little brother again, Dean ran down the front steps of the house, getting off of the porch and reaching the grass in his slippers. The house had been so hot inside, Dean could still feel the heat on his skin, the cool wind outside not bringing him any relief as he tried to soothe his sibling, bouncing him while making shushing noises like he's seen his Mommy do so many times before. Sam stopped crying and Dean stood on the front lawn, looking up at house, noticing Sammy's bedroom window where there was an orange moving light. "It's okay Sammy" he said softly to his baby brother.
Suddenly, Dean felt himself get grabbed and carried away from the house by someone. Before he could start to struggle against this stranger's hold, he heard his Daddy's deep voice next to his ear. "I gotcha!" Dean looked back at Sammy's window just in time to see it break, releasing huge flames into the air while he was carried away from the house by his Dad. Sam was cradled in his arms while he was held in his Daddy's arms and Dean could only think…. where is his Mommy?
End Flashback
Now they were heading to a motel for the night. After the fire was finally put out, the fire marshal told them that they wouldn't be able to return to the house until a full investigation was done and a cause for the fire was established, as well as it being a health risk if they were to return to the house. The police taped off the house, and advised John to stay with some relatives. Considering there were none, John figured the next best thing was to go to a motel in town until things were sorted.
John had no problem not returning to the house that his wife was murdered in. They had bought the house right after they got married. They had started a family and a life there. Now the only thing he could see was Mary, bloody and pinned to that ceiling, right before she burst into flames in his youngest son's nursery. How was he going to explain that to anyone, if they even believed him? He wouldn't blame them if they didn't believe him, he was having a hard time believing it himself…. how was it even possible? And how the heck was he going to tell his boys that their Mom was dead and that she wouldn't be coming back?
Leaving those thoughts behind to deal with later, he had another matter to attend to. Dean was currently in the back with Sammy, trying to calm the baby down from his booster seat, but no matter what the child did, Sam would not stop wailing and it was starting to worry him. Earlier, when he grabbed Dean and Sammy from the yard, Sam was completely silent and had been that way throughout the entire chaos of having the firemen, policemen and nosy neighbors milling around. He had just quietly looked around at the people bustling about, not uttering a sound…but now there was no way to console the distraught baby.
The wailing hadn't begun until they were in the Impala and driving away from the only place John had ever really called home…though that life had been taken away from him and his boys when Mary died. He really had no idea how to figure out what was causing his little boy so much grief. He wasn't hungry, didn't need changed as John had taken care of those things before they started on their way to the motel. That was another thing that he was going to miss now that Mary was gone. She was so good with their kids, a natural born mother and boy, did she loved being a mother. As soon as she found out she was pregnant with Dean, she was over the moon with joy and excitement and it was the same thing she felt when they later found out that they would be having their second child a few years later. She was always so good with handling Dean as a baby, but it didn't compare to how in tuned she was to Sam's needs. She would know what was wrong and would have been able to fix everything in a matter of minutes.
Sam's wailing cut through his devastating thoughts and he brought himself back to the issue at hand. He couldn't think anymore of Mary right now…he didn't think he could stomach the heart ache, and right now his boys needed him.
"Shh shh shh…calm down, Sammy. S'okay."
Dean tried to calm his brother down from his booster seat, but the only response he received was even louder howls from the brunet baby. Not being able to handle anymore cries from his youngest, John pulled the Impala over on to the side of the road and parked. He got out of the driver's side, and went to the passenger side, climbing in the back and taking his fussing son out of the baby's car seat, trying to comfort him.
"Shh Sammy. I got you Baby Boy…shhshhh."
John rocked the 6-month-old, smiling when the rocking motion seemed to placate his son for a second, but then the baby was back to his shrill cries rather quickly…the volume escalating rapidly. Soon though, the shrieking became too much for Sammy, as he got so worked up that he started gasping and coughing roughly, then truly scaring himself, he started crying harder, only to repeat the cycle. John didn't like that it sounded like Sammy seemed to be gasping for breath, but not really taking any in. He would sometimes do that when he was having a tantrum, but not like this. This was like he couldn't breathe. After a few seconds, Dean voiced his concerns as well.
"Daddy…is Sammy okay?"
His Daddy quickly put his brother back into the car seat, strapping him in quick, fighting with his brother's flailing arms. "He's still upset Dean, and seems like it's hard for him to catch his breath, but we're going to go get him checked out, okay? Watch your brother for me."
John didn't wait for a response, he just climbed back out of the backseat, closed the passenger door and jogged to the driver seat, quickly getting in, buckling up and adjusting the rear-view mirror until he could see Dean's face. "I need you to take care of your brother back there. Just watch him, and you let me know if anything changes, or if he seems worse, okay? Do you understand Dean?" He waited until he saw his oldest nod to him in the mirror, then started the engine and got back on the road, this time heading in the opposite direction towards their town's hospital. As they got closer, John didn't realize that he was now flooring the gas. He just kept thinking in his mind that after all that happened tonight, he couldn't lose his youngest too.
After a few minutes of weaving through the streets, the Impala screeched to a stop in the nearest parking space they could find in the hospital's parking lot. John unbuckled himself and wrenched open the passenger door, climbing into the back and getting Dean out of his booster first then taking Sammy out of the car seat. Once they were out of the car, John walked as quickly as Dean's little legs allowed, Dean's hand held securely in his left, while Sammy was still whining on his right hip.
On the way to the hospital Sam had finally stopped wailing, but his cries turned into whistle like whines that honestly scared John more than the howls had. At least with the howls, Sam was actively crying, moving around and flexing his legs in protest. Now he seemed sluggish, barely moving his arms and legs, and as soon as John had gotten him out of the car, Sam dropped his head onto his shoulder, never removing it to look around like he normally would have to look around.
They entered the hospital and John went straight through the main doors into a reception area where 2 young girls were talking behind computers. As John approached, a male nurse walked to the desk and handed one of the girls a file. The young father reached the desk and quickly got their attention.
"We need a doctor, right now."
One of the girls took in the state of the little family in front of her. The father was covered in dust or ash or something, and the little boy behind her was breathing a little hard. The baby on the father's shoulder was making little whine noises.
"What happened? What's the emergency?"
"There was a fire and my son's having trouble breathing, we need a doctor NOW." John tried to curb his irritation at their relaxed attitudes, but seriously…this was important and they needed to do their jobs and get a Doctor to look at his son.
"Alright, Sir, take a seat and fill out this paperwork and I'll have a doctor paged." One of the girls said, while the other one tried to hand him a clipboard with forms and a pen attached.
"Did you not understand what I said? My son is having trouble breathing and he needs to see a Doctor right now!" John growled out, not being able to take any more of their calm demeanor. The male nurse was about to step in, but everyone halted when Dean cried out.
"Daddy! Sammy's lips are turning purple!"
Just like that, the atmosphere in the reception area changed. One of the girls got on the phone while the male nurse tried to take Sammy from John's arms, but John wasn't having it. Punching in some numbers on the phone, the girl pushed up her glasses while looking at John expectantly.
"Sir, you need to give your son to Nurse Bodi so we can help you.", she turned her attention back to the phone and spoke in the receiver, "–Yes this is Abby from reception, we have an infant down here that is having breathing complications, possibly due to smoke inhalation. Yes…yes, his lips are turning purple and he's lethargic, I have Nurse Bodi here who can take the infant to PICU. Yes, I understand. I'll let them know, thank you."
While the receptionist was on the phone, the other receptionist had left, but then shortly came back with a small canister and mask. John realized that it was oxygen and carefully took Sammy from his shoulder and cradled him in his arms. 'he's so still' John thought when he looked at his infant son, looking so small in his muscular arms. The receptionist handed the oxygen to the male nurse and he set it up, placing the mask over the baby's still face, the mask covering up the majority of his face. After the oxygen was established, he looked at the young father, making direct eye contact.
"Sir, I need to take your son to PICU now, he needs attention immediately and right now we're wasting time for your son."
John immediately relinquished control and quickly handed over his son to the nurse. "Go. Get him help!" He felt so helpless, watching his baby disappearing down the hallway, but from the receptionist standing in his way with that clipboard, he knew they wouldn't let him follow. Dean however, didn't understand.
"Where did that man go? Dad, why did you let him take Sammy? Why can't we go?"
The receptionist still behind the desk saw the worried look on the child's face and her heart went out to the little kid. "Don't you worry, Nurse Bodi took your brother to a Doctor so he can get the help he needs. Your Daddy just needs to fill out some forms for us, and then when the doctor is done seeing your brother we will let you know, okay? What's your name?"
Dean at first thought that he shouldn't say anything, since he wasn't supposed to talk to strangers, but his Daddy had been talking to these people and they were helping Sammy, so he figured it would be okay to tell them his name. "Dean." He said quietly. The receptionist smiled at him. "Dean, that is a really nice name. Well Dean, you've been really brave, and around here, brave little guys such as yourself get treats. Which would you like? We have suckers or stickers." Dean looked at his Daddy to see if he should take it and smiled widely when his Daddy encouraged him forward. Of course choosing the sucker, Dean followed his Daddy to the area that had a lot of chairs and sat down with his Daddy. He enjoyed his sucker while watching his Daddy fill out the paper that the lady gave him. Pretty soon though, after his sucker was almost done, he was starting to get really droopy eyed, and leaned more on his Daddy, closing his eyes after a few minutes.
John finished the paperwork, then situated Dean a little more securely on his own chair and then walked up to reception, handing back the paperwork to the young ladies. He asked if there was any update to his son's condition, but they hadn't heard back yet from the PICU regarding Sam so he went back over the waiting area and pulled his sleeping son out of his chair and onto his lap, settling in to wait for any news on his youngest.
John was jolted awake to one of the receptionists calling his name, shaking his shoulder gently. "Mr. Winchester?"
"How long was I asleep?" John asked gruffly, sleep still evident in his voice.
"A few hours. We just received word that your son is resting in one of the recovery rooms in the PICU so you can see him shortly. Dr. Jefferson is coming down to talk to you." John nodded and the receptionist walked away. John tried to get himself more awake so he would be ready to talk to the doctor. After a few minutes, a young man came down the hall, his white lab coat billowing behind him from his lengthy strides. Since he was the only one in the waiting room, surprisingly, John figured the man was coming for him.
"Dr. Jefferson I presume?"
The doctor smiled kindly at him. "You would be correct in your presumption Mr. Winchester. If you would follow me please, I would like to discuss your son's situation with you."
John was just about to ask what 'situation' the doctor was talking about, but the young doc had already started back the way he came. John swiftly scooped up Dean and rested his sleeping child against his shoulder. Years of practice in this position, Dean snuggled more into his father's shoulder and kept sleeping on, undisturbed. They headed through a couple of halls, turning left then right, before they stopped at the doctor's office door, his name displayed proudly high on the door. The young man opened the door and invited the father inside, softly shutting the door behind them both.
"Before we see your son, Mr. Winchester, I would like to ask how this all happened."
"There was a fire in our house tonight. Flames and smoke were everywhere in the room…the fire began in his nursery" John elaborated at the doc's questioning face. "I was able to get my 2 boys out of the house, but their Mother… their Mother di-…Mary, um…she didn't…make…it." John could hardly think the words, much less say them out loud to someone else without choking up.
"I'm truly sorry for your loss, Mr. Winchester. It's never an easy thing to deal with…"
John was about to snap at the doctor that he couldn't possibly know, but the look on the kid's face had stopped him. "It sounds like you speak from experience." He stated tentatively. The doctor raised his left hand, showing a band on his wedding finger. "We were married when I graduated medical school. We had 3 wonderful years together until she passed. Cancer." "I'm sorry." John said, not knowing what else to say. There never was a right response for this kind of thing. No words take the pain away John thought sadly.
"I'm sorry I got us started on the subject, but Mr. Winchester, I really must know, do you smoke or did your wife?"
John shook his head adamantly. "No, M-Mary never did, and I only did for a short while after high school when I went into the service. But that was years ago."
"Okay, how long was your son exposed to the fire before you were able to get him out of his nursery?"
"Not long at all. I heard my wife scream and I ran up to the nursery and saw the fire and Sammy was crying. M-Mary was…she was already…" he trailed off, figuring the doctor could connect the dots. He also changed the sequence of events to sound more sane…who would really believe him if he said that the nursery practically burst into flames within minutes of his wife being put on the ceiling.
"Has Sam ever been around any relatives that smoke, or put in any type of situation that would expose him to second hand smoke?" the doctor pressed. John wasn't sure that he liked where this line of questioning was going.
"No, Sammy hasn't been in any type of situation with smokers of any kind. He has no relatives outside of his Mother, me and Dean. There's no one else, and since he was born, we haven't really gone out, so there have been no babysitters, and no friends have visited. What's this about?"
"I'm sorry Mr. Winchester, if my questions seem a bit accusatory, but I needed to find out. The reason I ask is because after we got Sam stable, we ran tests on his respiratory system, and the results that came back are not as ideal as we were hoping. The tests showed that a lot of Sam's alveoli are damaged as a result of smoke inhalation. Now, you said that he was exposed to the smoke briefly, but I've never seen this kind of aggressive damage resulting after only brief exposure, it's really quite strange." Dr. Jefferson explained.
"I'm sorry, I'm not following. What's damaged?" John asked, overwhelmed. The doctor blushed, embarrassed. "Please forgive me, sometimes I start explaining in medical terminology, not even thinking… Alveoli are tiny air sacs where oxygen gets passed from the lungs into the bloodstream. They allow for rapid gaseous exchange, for example, through the very thin walls of the alveoli, oxygen from the air passes to the surrounding capillaries. Hemoglobin helps move oxygen from the air sacs to the blood. At the same time that's happening, carbon dioxide moves from the capillaries into the air sacs. Infants are born with only about one-fifth of the 300 million alveoli they will need as adults. They construct almost all of those 300 million alveoli between birth and age eight."
John nodded, showing that he understood and kept silent so the doctor would continue.
"During our tests with Sam, we noticed that he had developed hyper-reactive, or 'ticklish', as we call them, airways which typically occur in children and adults with asthma. My diagnosis is that, because of this fire and with his lungs still under development, Sam will more than likely develop asthma as he gets older, or the symptoms of asthma in which his lungs may never be able to fully recover."
John was finding the truth of the situation a hard pill to swallow and had to sit back in his chair. "And- and what would the symptoms be?" He asked, his voice tight.
"Well, the symptoms vary for each person. One person may have every symptom under the sun for asthma, while another will never experience any of the symptoms and lead a pretty normal life. Some symptoms to look out for are difficulty breathing, chest pain or tightness, coughing, wheezing, anxiety, fast heart rate, throat irritation, shortness of breath at night, just to name a few of the common signs. You also need to be on the alert for triggers."
"Triggers?" John questioned.
"Yes, these are things that can trigger an asthma attack, hence the name. Unfortunately, there are hundreds of triggers for asthmatics, but just like symptoms, they differ for everyone. Some are common allergens like animal dander, mold, pollen, smoke, dust mites, certain food allergies, or inhaling cold/dry air, and upper respiratory infections. Other triggers could include vigorous exercise, stress, Aspirin, or even pollution and fumes. Now please remember, John, that he may not develop any further complications, it's too soon to tell how everything's going to turn out, either way. I just want you to be informed, so you can know what to look for."
John's head was swimming with all the information that was given to him. He wished Mary was here with them…she would know how to handle this…him? Not so much. "Can we see him now?"
Dr. Jefferson gave a sad smile to the overwhelmed father before him. "I will take you to him in a minute…but first we need to talk about Dean."
That got John's attention. "Dean?"
The doctor nodded. "Yes, we also need to test Dean."
The father shook his head. "Why does Dean need tested? He was never in the nursery while the fire was burning."
"Be that as it may Mr. Winchester, we would still like to have him tested out, make sure that everything is alright. You said Sam was only by the fire for a few minutes, but for whatever reason, this fire was extremely intense, a lot more intense than it should have been, based on all of the damage it did to Sam's lungs, so we would rather like to err on the side of caution."
John really wanted to protest, just for the fact that he wanted to get his baby and take his boys to a motel so he could shut them away from the world, even if it was just for a little bit. However, he knew how much worse everything would be if he just shrugged off the doctor's advice. What if something had happened to Dean while they were still in the burning house and he just ignored it. Dean could end up in the same scenario as Sammy, or even worse and John didn't think that he could handle much more right now. Everything was already out of his control, he didn't want to make matters worse.
"Okay, when would he be able to be tested?" John asked tiredly, rubbing his eyes.
"I'll actually take him right now since it's slow tonight. You can wait here if you would like to."
John looked at the doctor, not sure he heard him correctly. "I would actually rather go with you two, besides, this is your office..." He said slowly.
The young doctor gave him a tight smile. "Yes, I know. I just figured you would be more comfortable here while I run the tests, but if you would feel more comfortable back in the waiting room, you're free to wait there. Unfortunately, it's hospital policy that no one besides hospital personnel and patients go in certain areas, like in the testing departments. I promise though, Dean will be with me the entire time and we will come right back."
"Okay…I'll be right here then, thank you." John accepted the offer, even though he didn't like the fact that both of his sons would be out of his sight. He did like the feeling of privacy the small office offered however, rather than going back to the open area of the waiting room.
He shook Dean to wake him up, and explained to his son that he was going to do some tests with Doctor Jefferson. When Dean started to protest, John told him that as soon as they were done with the tests, they would go see how Sammy was doing. The doctor and Dean left the room and John closed his eyes, trying to relax his thoughts while they were gone.
John must have fallen asleep again because the next thing he knew, he was poked on the cheek by what felt like a small finger, and heard Dean giggle. He sat up and rubbed the sleep out of his eyes. "Hey buddy, back so soon? Were you good for the doctor Dean and listen to what he said?" His four-year-old smiled brightly and revealed his hands that were hiding behind his back. "Yep! And look, Dr. Jefferson even gave me another sucker and two stickers! Cool, huh?" Dean was so proud, John couldn't help but offer a smile himself. "Yeah, that's really cool, did you thank Dr. Jefferson?"
This time it was the good doctor that chuckled. "Yes, he did, right Dean?" Getting a nod from Dean, the doctor continued on, addressing John. "He listened really well on the tests, and followed instructions well, he was really brave. I should have the results back in about an hour or two. In the meantime, how about we go see how Sam's doing." Not needing to be told twice, John got up, stretched out his tired muscles and followed the doctor and Dean out of the office.
They got down to the PICU and went down one of the halls that veered to the left. Stopping at the last door at the end of the hall, Dr. Jefferson turned to his companions. "Now, Sam is resting and he's connected to oxygen to help him out a little, so it may be a little unnerving to see him, but remember, the machines are there to help him. He's fine, just keep that in mind." Getting simultaneous nods from the father and son, Dr. Jefferson opened the door and let his charges in ahead of himself.
"Sammy…" Dean whispered, already next to the infant's crib, looking in through the thin bars at his sleeping brother. John felt like he couldn't breathe. The walls were filled with colors and animals were painted on the walls to make the room cheerful for its occupants, but John just felt numb. Laying still in a hospital crib was his little baby…his baby boy. He stared at the monitors surrounding and attached to his son making John feel as if at any moment, Sammy could be ripped away from him and Dean.
Dr. Jefferson had warned them that the oxygen was there to help Sam breathe easier, but looking at it was making it difficult for John to really believe that his baby was alright. The mask seemed so big on his baby's face, it practically swallowed him up. Sammy was normally a very interactive baby, always moving around and getting into everything he could while unsupervised…it drove Mary crazy when she would turn around from doing dishes or laundry and see little Sammy sitting there, having a blast unwrapping the towels she just folded, or opening up the cupboard doors in the kitchen to climb in the small space under the sink. Seeing Sammy just laying there, still, with wires hooked up to him made John even more devastated. He walked up next to Dean by the crib and gently stroked Sam's small chubby cheek, the part that wasn't covered with tape to hold the wires in place. What he wouldn't give to have those little hazel eyes open up, to show him that they hadn't lost the youngest member of their family tonight, along with Mary.
"I'll leave you guys alone. I am going to be at the nurse's station right outside, if you need me." Dr. Jefferson said quietly and closed the door behind him gently.
As soon as they were alone, Dean put his small hand through the bars of the crib, wrapping his hand around his little brother's clenched fist, trying to give him any comfort he could. "It's okay now Sam. Me and Daddy are here." The little boy turned to his father with complete trust in his eyes, "Right Daddy? Everything's going to be okay?"
John sniffed and squeezed Dean's shoulder once. "That's right buddy. Everything is going to be okay." Somehow… John thought in his mind before looking down at his baby again. He would make sure that everything would be okay for his family. He'd make sure that his children were protected and safe…and the only way to do that was to figure out what caused that fire. There was no way that was an ordinary fire. The way that Mary was pinned to the ceiling, her stomach slashed open, then out of nowhere, a fire began, engulfing Mary completely, before destroying his son's nursery within moments. There was something…unnatural about the entire thing, and John was going to figure out what had happened…and avenge his wife's death. His boys would be safe and Mary's death would not be in vain, John would make sure of it.
A/N: Thanks for reading this! Let me know what you think of the story by leaving a review, I hope you enjoyed.
PICU means Pediatric Intensive Care Unit