The 'Break' Up Ramification
The hours turned into days and days turned into weeks. Sheldon had been patiently waiting for 64,800 minutes, which meant 3,888,000 seconds without Amy.
That was the longest he had ever gone without even a text exchange from Amy in the five years he has known her.
That was 3,888,000 seconds too much without her.
He promised to be patient, he wanted to respect her decision for some space and time but every man has his patience and this is where his ends!
45 whole days. That's how long he was gone, that's how long he was willing to wait and not a second longer.
During these 45 days, he kept replaying the last five years in his head. He realized that he had been an ass at times and that he had been difficult as well, but he also felt that he had made great strides over the past year alone.
Never would he admit openly and willingly that he loved someone if he really didn't believe it. Why couldn't Amy see how far he had come?
This is what enraged him the most. And now that he was completely ready to commit to her…to marry her…and she had the audacity to ask for time to re-evaluate their situation. MALARKEY!
He grabbed his bag and left the apartment, slamming the door behind him.
An hour later he was at Amy's.
Knock, knock, knock, "Amy, open the door!"
Knock, knock, knock, "Amy, open the door!"
Knock, knock, knock, "Amy, open the door!"
She opened the door and saw his eyes…they were dark and his look, weary but fierce.
"Sheldon, what are you doing here and why are you yelling?" she stated calmly even though her knees were almost ready to give out at the sight of him. There was something dark and rough about him…something manly that made her all squishy inside.
"The question is not what I'm doing here but rather what are you doing?" he replied in a stern tone.
"Sheldon, I …," but she was cut off. He walked right passed her, dropped his bag on the floor next to the couch and took a seat in his spot.
"We need to wrap this 'break' up," he stated.
"What if I need more time?" she asked somewhat annoyed.
"Oh really?" he said ironically. "You need more time Amy? Why? Why do you need more time? What have I done that was so terrible that you need more time?" he demanded to know.
"What have you done?! Are you seriously asking me this question after a month or so?"
"A month or so! A month or so? Try 45 days Amy! It's been 45 days! What do you want from me?!" he said now clearly more agitated than before.
"I'm tired of waiting for you to catch up! I'm tired of fighting for crumbs of your affection! I'm tired of being patient! I mean, seriously… what the hell Sheldon!"
He sits back on the couch, folds his arms across his chest and gives her a dirty look.
"How exactly have you been patient?" he questioned.
"I've been waiting for you to be ready emotionally and physically with me for years now," she replied.
"Oh really? Is that so? He said sarcastically. "As I recall, you were the one who said all forms of physical contact up to and including coitus were off the table. When exactly did you put them on the table Amy?"
"When you asked me to be your girlfriend. I assumed you understood what being in a boy-girl relationship constituted," she answered back.
"I did and I do, however, when I asked you to be my girlfriend, I had also said that nothing would change physical or otherwise. Then I stipulated it in a written agreement- which again, you agreed to."
Amy was stumped for words. Sheldon did have a valid point. She had agreed to everything and all too willingly, a mistake she now regrets.
"Well, don't you have anything to say?" he asked.
"You're right. I did agree," she sadly admitted.
Lowering his voice he asked, "Then I'm asking you again. How have you been patient?"
"I don't know how to answer that now Sheldon."
He could see that her eyes started to get watery and he didn't like seeing her sad and teary but he had to remind her that things were not as one-sided as she had made them out to be. He continued speaking to her in a calm demeanor.
"You never challenged what I wrote in the agreement; you went along with it so I assumed you were satisfied with the pace. I've been satisfied. I've gotten to know you and slowly build up these feelings of love I have for you. I didn't fall in love with you because the 'sex was good' as some would say. I fell in love with you as a person, quirks and all. I knew I wanted to be with you and only you so that is why I asked you to be my girlfriend in the first place. Well, that and the fact that I didn't want you dating anyone else…especially Stuart"
He shook his head in disappointment.
"I thought that we had and have the rest of our lives to explore other facets of our relationship. I thought that is what you wanted as well."
"I do want that Sheldon."
"So why are you re-evaluating this?" he asked with a sigh.
'Because you seem to take it for granted that I'll always be here no matter what. It seems that I'm not a priority to you. I'm not always going to be around if I feel I'm not wanted Sheldon, agreement or no agreement," she replied with a heavy heart.
"Of course I want you. Where would you get a silly idea like that?" he asked.
"From you!" she said sharply. "Every time you do something without any consideration for my feelings it leads me to believe that YOU don't want me!
I need proof Sheldon, tangible proof that you truly need me and want me in your life."
"Isn't the relationship agreement proof enough?" he asked.
'No! It isn't! At this point that agreement seems to be holding us back. We are a couple. We are supposed to be in love. I shouldn't feel restricted to touch you and be with you because a stupid agreement says it's not 'date night'!" she said as she heightened her voice and did the air quote sign for the last two words.
"Again, I don't see where you are going with this. You, yourself, have approved of every single amendment we have made in that so called 'stupid' agreement," he said as he did the air quote thing back to her. "Secondly, I have never pushed you away or stopped you from touching me. You do that all on your own little lady."
"What!" she shouted.
"What you heard! You were the one who grabbed my hand that night after meeting Zach and then just let it go saying 'nope…nothing'," he sounded condescending. "That was rather disheartening for me. It made it clear to me that you just wanted to be friends. Moreover, that same year you got drunk and kissed me…right here...on this very spot," he said as he pointed to his location on the couch. 'Did I push you away? No… I actually thought the kiss was fascinating. It was my first kiss with a girl I was fond of. And that time when the girls didn't include you in dress shopping…you turned to me for comfort because I came to check up on you. We cuddled Amy! Did I push you away then? No! We weren't even in a formal relationship!" he exclaimed.
"Yes, but I also remember asking for physical contact that night and you refused," she replied.
"I was not going to engage in coitus just because you felt bad Amy! Sex is reserved to be shared with the person you love. It's not just another activity like playing ping pong!" he retorted.
"Really? That's what you honestly think about sex Sheldon?" she asked in response to his impassioned statement.
"Of course it is," he said quietly not quite believing he had uttered that sentiment himself.
"That's so romantic…not to mention old world of you."
"Amy, if I were interested in 'getting laid' as some people put it, I had my opportunities. It wasn't something I was interested in until you came along."
"But you say you love me now but we still don't touch like that. We don't even kiss like that…or anything like that."
"That is true," he said as he looked down. "But still, I haven't warded you off from touching me. I'm working really hard to overcome my phobias and nervousness where you are concerned." Amy continued to listen to him, trying to configure his reasoning.
"We hug, kiss, hold hands and even cuddle. I've applied Vapo rub on your chest that time you were ill. I've even spanked your bottom." He smiled as the image of him swatting her lush posterior came to him but snapped out of it rather quickly. He was there for a purpose…not to reminisce about such events.
"…and all of that in 3 years. I was never able to touch anyone all my life! Don't you see how much I try for you? For us? I've even talked dirty to you!"
"Well, yes, I suppose you have been trying," she said while contemplating what he just stated.
"I have," he said honestly but turned the situation right around again. "What's your excuse though? Do you have phobias as well?" he said as his eyes pierced through her.
"What!" she exclaimed. "No, of course I don't!"
"Well then, why are you afraid to touch me?" he questioned.
It was a completely valid question at that… on his part and from his perspective.
"I'm scared that you'll overreact and disappear." She replied.
"I've just proven to you that I've never pushed your touch away. I'm the one who has issues…which I'm dealing with. When I kissed you on the train...what did you do? Nothing! I put my hands on your body Amy and you froze."
"Hey! You caught me off guard," she said defensively.
"And you've been caught off guard for practically every kiss since then because I don't remember you laying your hands on me until that day at the tree lot under the mistletoe." He said with derision.
"That's not true Sheldon Cooper! I've touched you before that! I've hugged you before…quite a few times in fact and you never reciprocated them until the day I almost left you after that Mars fiasco!"
"THAT'S BECAUSE I HAVE ISSUES!" he yelped while turning bright red in the face.
"Well, you know what? I'M TIRED OF YOUR ISSUES WHERE THEY CONCERN ME!" she yelled back. "I want to be loved wholly and completely without fears Sheldon! I don't want to be the 'next best thing'. I don't want to be in competition for your affection with a TV show!" she continued yelling.
"I see," he stated calmly and coldly. "Then I believe we have reached an impasse."
"I suppose we have," Amy said solemnly.
This is not the end… just a twist…you know, for the dramatic effect ;)
Thanks for reading!