He couldn't believe it when his plan backfired. Seeing Rachel and Finn together again was like a punch in the gut. It wasn't what he'd wanted or expected.
He was sure when he told her in New York that she had to choose that she would choose New York and leave Finn behind for good. One more year or not, he thought he knew Rachel and her dedication and her focus.
He must have underestimated her love for Finn.
He'd been hoping they'd stay apart after the breakup because of sex!lies and Puckleberry but apparently that just wasn't enough to make them forget their love.
When they became friends just before Christmas – and let's face it, that was a long time coming – he knew Finchel was a sinking ship. He knew about Santana and he knew Rachel didn't. He figured he'd get a brother and a best friend and they would lead two different lives.
He was honestly thrilled when Finn and Quinn hooked up again. Because she would hold him back and tell him what to do and basically crush and thoughts of him leaving Lima to do anything but play in football games or go to the fair.
He knew Quinn would never encourage him to live up to the potential that Carole and Mr. Schue saw in him.
Or the potential Rachel saw in him.
It was mean and wrong and he knew it but it was how he felt and he couldn't stop those feelsing any more than the feelings he had for Blaine.
He'd had it all planned out. He had already spoken to his boyfriend about it for goodness sake!
After graduation the three of them would hop the first plane to New York City. He would be at the Fashion Institute or the New School. Rachel and Blaine would be at NYU. And sure, for the first year they would have to live on campus but after that they would be able to get a small two bedroom apartment together and it would be amazing.
And then when Rachel had said Finn would never be there? His heart actually soared. Because he thought he wouldn't have to convince her as much as he thought he would, that she was convinced enough.
And then singing For Good in the Gershwin with her? The passion, the love, she put into every word, every note, every move … it filled him with such joy and hope that he couldn't hold the tears at bay. He was sure when she said that Broadway was her one true love that he could breathe easier.
He never expected the kiss. He didn't see it but he knew it had happened just as well as everyone else in the group. The awkward silence kind of gave it away.
And he was pretty sure Mr. Schue was the first to start clapping. And that was awkward.
They got through the last song and they sounded great and he thought maybe, just maybe, it would all be okay. Just because Finn and Rachel – probably more Rachel than Finn – got caught in the moment didn't mean they would get back together.
It was less probable than possible.
And after they lost and everyone started blaming them and their inability to act professional on said loss, he was one hundred percent certain that she would kick him to the curb and I would be the Kurt and Rachel Show (featuring Blaine Warbler) from then on out.
Don't get him wrong. He loved his brother and his best friend. But he loved them individually.
It may seem shallow and petty but when they were together no one else existed and, all things considered, he just found Rachel and her friendship and he wasn't ready to lose her to his brother.
Truth be told, it was weird thinking about his best friend and his brother together. Finn was truly the first guy he ever had a real crush on (Jeff Conaway didn't really count) and now they were brothers and that was enough of an adjustment. And now to have to see them together again? In his house?
It just wasn't something he was looking forward to.
So when the two of them walked into glee, hand in hand and bright smiles on their faces, he knew his plans were about to go right down the drain.
After Mr. Schue sat them down and gave them another pep-talk about how twelfth place for a first-time team was amazing and that the school was proud of them, he turned to Quinn with a frown. "You don't seem too broken up about that," he said as he indicated the sickening sight of Rachel giggling while Finn stole tiny kisses.
The blonde shook her head and turned her eyes away. "It was inevitable anyway, wasn't it?"
"I thought she was all about New York?" he asked in a voice that was a little too disinterested to actually be disinterested.
She shrugged. "Doesn't mean she's not about him too. Face it, Kurt. You're looking at the future Mrs. Rachel Hudson."
"Don't get me started," he muttered before standing and leaving the room.
This was ridiculous. It should have been over. She should have realized that he was the reason she lost Nationals. She should have remembered the morning in front of Tiffany's when she said that Finn would never leave Lima because he was too much of a country boy.
She should have realized that in just a few short months she would have her heart broken again and while, yes, he was fluent in girl tears and broken hearts, he didn't want it to be like that in New York.
Because he knew she was going to fall harder, faster, deeper this time and while he knew in his heart of hearts that she'd never give up her dream of moving to New York, he had an irrational fear that she might postpone it.
For him.
And suddenly he was angry. He was angrier than when Will & Grace was cancelled. Angrier than when he re-watched The Wizard of Oz after seeing Wicked for the first time.
So he did what any good Hummel would do.
He stormed back into the choir room, marched right up to Rachel, stuck a (perfectly manicured) finger in her face and said, "I thought you chose Broadway."
Rachel jerked her head back so quickly that her whole body moved, her chair skidding a few inches. "What?"
"In New York you told me Broadway was your true love and now you're sitting here looking like you're practicing for your wedding night!"
"Dude! Chill out," Finn said as he stood and looked down at him.
"This is your fault," Kurt screeched as he glared up at Finn.
"What's my fault?"
"She's going to give up my dream for you!"
"What?" Rachel asked as she pushed her way between the brothers. "What did you say?"
"We talked about it in New York, Rachel. Me, you and Blaine living in the city after graduation. And you said Finn would never come and I told you to choose and you chose New York. Now one kiss later and you're all over him again!"
"More than one kiss," Finn interjected.
"Whatever. What happened to leaving Lima and never coming back?"
"I'm still leaving, Kurt," she said softly as she turned to look him directly in the eye. "I'm going to New York after graduation no matter what."
"What about Finn?" he asked as he looked between the two of them.
"We'll cross that bridge when we come to it," Finn answered as he wrapped an arm tightly around Rachel. "Graduation's a year away."
Kurt stared at the two of them for a moment, sad resignation crossing his face.
"So I guess this is it then. It's going to be all Finn, all the time again."
"Holy shit, he's jealous!" Puck called from the back row.
"I am not!" he turned and snapped at the heathen with the mohawk.
Puck just snorted and wrapped an arm around Lauren, who glared at him until he pulled it back.
"Is that it, Kurt?" Rachel asked quietly. "Are you afraid my relationship with Finn is going to hinder my friendship with you?" When he didn't answer, she smiled gently and continued, "It's actually a good thing, in my estimation."
"How's that?" he snorted inelegantly.
"You, Blaine and I can plan for New York while we're on double dates."
"And Finn?"
"I can help," he shrugged. "I mean, a lot can happen in a year, right?"
Kurt stared at them for a moment and in that brief time, the dream shifted. It was four of them now. Not all living together, of course, because Finn went to school in New Jersey, but of him and Rachel and Blaine sitting on the risers in Central Park watching the FDNY All-Star softball team took on their counterparts from the NYPD.
He smiled as Finn hit the ball and started running the bases and Rachel jumped up and cheered for him, the hot July sun glinting off her small but lovely diamond ring that Finn wouldn't tell him where he bought it because it was probably bought somewhere that he would deem wholly unacceptable.
He reached out and pulled Rachel into a strong hug, burying his face in her hair. "I don't want to lose you to him."
"You won't," she promised quietly. "You never will."
"Good. Because I'd hate to have to hate you again."
"As long as you don't try to give me another makeover so Finn will like me …"
Kurt chuckled. "Promise."
"Aww, you guys!" Finn grinned and wrapped his arms around both of them, causing Rachel to giggle and Kurt to shake his head.
Maybe they could have it all.