Chapter 1: Friday Evening
Unusually for him, Maxxie was feeling lonely. He had said a final farewell to his partner, James some months ago. They had separated after James spent more and more time away from Maxxie. It seemed that he preferred older men. Meanwhile, Maxxie was also beginning to have doubts about his feelings towards his ex-partner, James and even his own sexuality. To his surprise, he was beginning to be physically attracted to the dancing girls in his theatre company. He wasn't making any close friends and loneliness was getting to him. He was descending into deep despair.
One Friday evening in May, he decided in his desolation to try to drink himself into unconsciousness. He was sitting alone at a table in his favourite Hampstead bar, nursing what was left of a double whisky. It was his fifth that evening. The alcohol was having the desired effect and he was losing himself in a whisky-fuelled haze.
He became conscious of a warm, friendly female voice next to him.
"I believe I've seen you somewhere before." said the girl, "You come from Bristol, don't you?"
Maxxie snapped out of his reverie and looked round. The owner of the voice was a somewhat skinny but attractive girl with pale skin, big expressive brown eyes and a winning smile. Her black hair was long and straight with a fringe. She was wearing a black strapless crop top and a matching miniskirt. Her shoulders, arms, midriff and legs were bare.
"I did come from Bristol, but that was some time ago." said Maxxie, "Should I know you?"
"I don't know." said the girl, "You might have seen me at Roundview College, although back then, I was spending a lot of my time in a clinic."
There was something about the girl's voice and manner that captivated Maxxie. She was arousing some quite unfamiliar feelings in him. His eyes were drawn to the graceful lines of her slender bare shoulders.
"I did go to Roundview." said Maxxie, "I was one of a little group of about eight friends. Incidentally, you haven't told me your name. I'm Maxxie."
"I'm Caterina," said the girl, "but you can call me Katie."
"I think I prefer Caterina." said Maxxie, "It sounds more romantic and it suits you."
"Oh, yes! I remember you now." said Caterina, "You used to go round with a tall skinny Indian guy."
"Yes, I did go round with Anwar quite a lot." said Maxxie, "He was my closest friend."
"What happened to him?" asked Caterina.
"He came to London with us, but only stayed a few weeks." said Maxxie, "I think he went back to Bristol."
"Anyway, Maxxie," said Caterina, looking at Maxxie's almost empty glass and the four completely empty ones, "you seem to be communicating with the spirits. If you don't mind me asking, what are they telling you?"
Maxxie was gradually falling under the spell of Caterina's sweet, gentle voice. She seemed to him like a dark angel come to heal his broken heart.
"Can I trust you with my thoughts?" asked Maxxie, "After all, I've only just met you, although you do seem to know who I am."
"You can trust me." said Caterina, "All the time I was in the clinic, I got quite used to lending a sympathetic ear to other patients' problems. In any case, 'a trouble shared is a trouble halved'."
"I suppose so." said Maxxie, "You seem to be quite a compassionate person. I should mention that I'm not really used to talking to girls."
"Oh yes!" remarked Caterina, "You were the gay one weren't you. Weren't you stalked by a little welsh girl in your final year at Roundview?"
"Yes, I was." said Maxxie, "Sketch was obsessed, but I think I gave her a rude awakening. I don't think she was too upset, because, almost immediately after I rejected her, she started going out with Anwar. Anyway, this is turning into a rather strange evening. I came into this bar with the intention of drinking myself into oblivion. Then you come in, claiming to know me, and you do seem to know quite a lot about me. Can I be sure you're real?"
Maxxie was resting his right hand on the table. Caterina placed her left hand on it and gently stroked Maxxie's knuckles with her delicate fingers. Maxxie could sense the warmth of her affection.
"You can feel that, can't you?" said Caterina, "I'm real alright. I'm not the whisky talking. I was feeling lonely, so I came in here and now I'm so glad I did because I've met someone I recognised from my home city."
"What brought you to London?" asked Maxxie.
"After school, I started working for an insurance company in Bristol." said Caterina, "After a while, I was offered promotion, but it meant having to move to head office in London. It was a bit of a wrench at first moving away from everything and everyone I knew in Bristol, though I did think it might be a good thing to make a totally clean break with the past."
"How did that work out?" asked Maxxie.
"It seemed to go quite well at first." said Caterina, "I started to settle down here, but after a while, I realised that I was getting really lonely. I wasn't making any real friends. When I got home in the evening, I closed my door and only had a little television for company, so tonight, I decided to come out to a pub and see if anyone might notice me."
"Instead of which you noticed me." said Maxxie, "What made you choose this particular pub?"
"I suppose it's because it's almost next door to where I live." said Caterina, "It's seemed quite lively whenever I've walked past, so I decided to look in."
"Are you glad you did now?" asked Maxxie.
"Yes, because I've met you." said Caterina, smiling, "You're the first person I noticed and I'm already beginning to like you. Anyway, this is so odd. I recognised you from Bristol. You looked depressed. I felt I might be able to cheer you up so I tried to find out what was troubling you and ended up telling you my story."
"It sounds as if you need a friend as well." said Maxxie, "A big city can be a very lonely place."
"You seem to be such a sweet person." said Caterina, "I can't imagine you being lonely for very long. You must know a lot of people, so why did you want to get so drunk this evening?"
"I seem to have lost track of where my life is taking me." said Maxxie, "Like you, I'm not making any real friends in London. There are a few people I call friends, but I'm not really close to anyone."
"Perhaps I might be able to remedy that." said Caterina, "Incidentally, what do you do for a living?"
"I'm a dancer." said Maxxie, "I perform four times a week at a West End theatre."
"So, in what way have you lost track?" asked Caterina.
"When I moved up to London, I had a boyfriend." said Maxxie, "We were very close. I thought I had a future with him, but it seemed he preferred middle aged blokes. After a couple of years, he left me to live with someone old enough to be my father. That hurt."
"You didn't find anyone else?" asked Caterina.
"No I didn't." said Maxxie, "After James went his own way, I began to realise I wasn't finding boys quite as attractive as I used to. Also I was beginning to have wicked ideas about the girls in the chorus line. In the past, I've thought of myself as totally gay, but I'm beginning to wonder if I am."
"Do you find me attractive?" asked Caterina, looking directly into Maxxie's eyes and smiling.
"I do, actually." said Maxxie, "Who wouldn't? You're beautiful. Your eyes are amazing. You're easy to talk to. Your voice enchants me and I'm beginning to believe you would like me to be a friend."
By this time, Maxxie's fifth glass was empty. Caterina offered to provide a refill.
"Do you want even more whisky, or are you drunk enough?" asked Caterina.
"I'd like a black coffee, but let me get it." said Maxxie, getting up, "What can I get you?"
"Thank you so much." said Caterina, "I'll have a Bacardi and coke. I'll be on that sofa when you come back."
As Caterina moved to the sofa, Maxxie walked somewhat unsteadily to the bar, ordered the drinks and returned with them to the sofa. The barman seemed quite relieved when he ordered coffee. Maxxie placed the drinks on the low table in front of the sofa and sat on Caterina's left. She sidled up to him and snuggled against him.
"I'm not too close am I?" said Caterina, "Let me know if I'm making you feel awkward."
"Of course not." said Maxxie, "It feels nice having you this close. I need a companion tonight."
He put his right arm across her bare shoulders and gently caressed her right upper arm with his fingertips. She kissed him on the cheek. They looked into each other's eyes and smiled.
"That feels so lovely, Maxxie." said Caterina, "I love the feel of your gentle fingers. I don't feel lonely anymore. Incidentally I hope you're not dancing tomorrow. Your journey to the bar and back looked quite interesting."
She had a friendly smirk on her face as she said this. Her eyes twinkled.
"I do feel strange when I stand up." said Maxxie, "I suppose I have had rather a lot of whisky here and I'd already finished the remains of a bottle of vodka before I left home. Fortunately, I've got the next two days off. My next performance isn't until Monday evening."
"That's just as well." said Caterina, "How far away is home?"
"It's about a fifteen minute walk from here." said Maxxie.
"Well, Maxxie," said Caterina, seriously, "I don't think you're in any state to walk home safely and I'm beginning to really care about you, so I've got a suggestion. When we've finished these drinks, we'll go to my flat. It's only two doors away. When we get there I'll make you something warm and soothing."
"Are you sure that's OK?" asked Maxxie, "After all I have only just met you."
"and I've only just met you, but as I said I'm beginning to care about you." said Caterina, "You really do need someone to look after you tonight. You're in no state to get home safely."
"Oh, alright!" said Maxxie, "You win. I was beginning to wonder if I was actually going to make it home tonight."
Once they had finished their drinks, Caterina helped Maxxie to his feet and guided him to her home. They climbed the stairs and entered the flat. Maxxie sat on the sofa while Caterina prepared two large mugs of hot chocolate. She returned with the two mugs, set them down on the coffee table, sat down next to him and linked her fingers with his.
"You didn't have to do this," said Maxxie, "but I'm glad you did. This is so sweet of you."
"I did it because, as I said, I'm really beginning to care about you." said Caterina, "I need a friend and you need someone to help you through a rough patch."
As they sat together, Maxxie disengaged his hand from Caterina's and gently caressed her shoulder. She seemed to enjoy this attention.
"Wow, gay boy!" exclaimed Caterina, "That feels so good. Your hand is so warm and gentle."
"I don't know whether it's the whisky," said Maxxie, "but I really love the feel of your skin. Being close to you somehow feels right."
Caterina kissed Maxxie's cheek again. This time, he reacted by gently pulling her towards him and kissing her lips.
"I think you enjoyed that." said Caterina, "I certainly did."
"It felt really good." said Maxxie, "When Sketch kissed me in the Osama show, I felt nothing, but you're different. I felt I wanted to go further. I hope I feel the same when I'm sober."
"I think you will." said Caterina, "You kissed me as if you really meant it."
They drank their hot chocolate while exchanging a few more memories of their lives in Bristol. Maxxie was gradually becoming more and more attracted to Caterina. However, the combination of vodka, whisky and hot chocolate was making him drowsy.
"You look as if you're having trouble keeping your eyes open." said Caterina, "I suppose I'd better let you sleep."
As Caterina got up, Maxxie removed his shoes and curled up on the sofa.
"Wouldn't you rather sleep on a bed?" asked Caterina, "You look so bunched up there."
"Yes I would," replied Maxxie, drowsily, "but are you sure about this?"
"I trust you, Maxxie." said Caterina, "In any case, you're too drunk to do much apart from sleeping."
"That's true." said Maxxie, as he got up from the sofa.
"You'll find that my bed's easily wide enough for three people," said Caterina, "so there'll be plenty of room."
Caterina helped a rather inebriated Maxxie to the bedroom and suggested that he would more comfortable if he stripped to his underpants. She also suggested that he should sleep on the side of the bed nearer the bathroom. Much to Caterina's surprise, he undressed completely before collapsing on to the bed, pulling the duvet over his naked body.
"I should advise you," said Caterina, as she started removing her clothes, "that I don't wear anything in bed either, especially in the summer."
She stripped naked and laid down on her side of the bed. This elicited a muffled comment.
"Wow!" mumbled Maxxie, "You're so beautiful."
"Thank you," said Caterina, "but shouldn't you be asleep."
Maxxie's reply was incomprehensible as sleep was now overtaking him. Once she was under the duvet, it wasn't very long before Caterina succumbed to deep sleep as well.