Dead Hearts.
Dead hearts are everywhere.
Roy walked wearily back to camp, exhausted. The day had been rough; he had lost three good men on a campaign to clear out the eastern part of the city. The higher-ups would consider the small loss of three a necessary sacrifice in order to continue the extermination of the Ishvalan people. Roy thought otherwise.
His face was ragged as was the rest of him. His feet ached, his back was killing him and he could feel his eyelids drooping dangerously low. At least the day was over and he could sleep, or at least try to. The sun was setting and he was thankful his team had been able to meet their objective before it was completely dark. Sun or no sun, the mission would continue until accomplished.
He had hoped he would be able to avoid the rest of company, but if he wanted to eat before he retired he had no choice but to join them. Luckily, most left him to himself, in fact many kept to themselves with only a few who tried to spark some small talk. They gave up soon after they realized no one was in the mood to talk. He could tell it had been a bad day for them all. He took a bowl and spoon from a soldier passing out the daily rations and looked down at the unappetizing sludge, losing himself in the events of the day.
He wasn't sure how long he had been staring at the gruel. It was long enough that half of the camp was around a mediocre campfire and half had already gone into their tents, trying to find some solace from the hostile environment they found themselves in. The sun had completely set and Roy wasn't feeling very hungry anymore. He set his meal on the ground, feeling a tinge of guilt for wasting precious rations, but assumed anyone hungry enough would finish it off. It was as he was headed towards his tent when he saw her.
It was only the second time he had seen her here in Ishval. The first was after she had saved him from an Ishvalan attacker. He'd been stunned to see her, especially in the condition she was in. Her eyes had given away that she was a murderer like the rest of them. Such a waste, he had thought when she had explained her decision to join the military.
He stopped dead in his tracks this time when he saw her. She was sitting next to a tent, presumably hers, her legs pulled against her chest as she stared out into space. What had really made him look twice was the blood that was splattered across the right side of her face and neck. He knew he shouldn't bother her, but that protective side of him surged forward in his chest and he walked towards her. They had been friends, after all, before the war, before he had even joined the military, before either of them had taken life.
"Major Mustang." She acknowledged as he approached, as if she had known he was staring the whole time.
"Hawkeye." He greeted, not addressing her with her military title as she had for him. He still loathed the idea of her being a soldier and didn't want to acknowledge it any further than was needed.
"Was there anything you needed?" She asked, continuing to look straight ahead, not once meeting his gaze.
"What's that mess all over your face?" He said coldly, not wanting to dance around the subject. She was clearly not in the mood for pleasantries and he was put off by that. She could at least be friendlier with him, one of her only childhood friends. What was he thinking? Childhood, ha, she was still only a mere girl.
"Blood, sir. Sgt. Caperty's." She said flatly. He flinched and hoped she hadn't seen. It was silent for only a moment before she continued. "Shot in the head while we were sniping in the south tower yesterday morning. He died instantly. Luckily the enemy didn't realize there were two of us up there. I was able to hold my position until it was safe to leave earlier this afternoon."
Roy thought he was going to be sick. Not because of what had happened to Caperty, but because she had been sitting right next to him as could be seen by the blood all over her. If the enemy had seen her too…he didn't dare think that she would be lying dead up in that tower right now. Had she said Caperty was killed yesterday morning? But she said she had only just gotten back this afternoon. He almost retched again. She had been stuck with that corpse for over twenty four hours. Roy had seen plenty of corpses, some fairly close to him, but when he thought about Hawkeye having to see something like that, to endure something like that, it was too much. He knew she could handle herself, but he didn't think she should have to.
She had always been an innocent little girl for as long as he had known her. Her eyes were always smiling even when the rest of her wasn't. She wasn't as outgoing as the other children in the town where he had apprenticed with her father, but when they were alone together she was lively and smiled, something she rarely did in public. Now her eyes were dead and he doubted she would ever smile again.
"Anything else, Major?" She interrupted his thoughts. Now she was looking at him with those lifeless amber eyes and he couldn't bear to hold her stare.
"Get yourself cleaned up at least before you go to bed." He said evenly, forcing himself to walk away from her and go sit by the fire with the others. He knew he wouldn't be able to sleep now, so why even try? His hope was that being around the other soldiers and the warmth of the fire would take his mind off of her and her blood-stained face, but it didn't. It was something that would haunt him for years to come. He couldn't help but feel he was to blame for her suffering.
Hours later as the fire snuffed itself out, Roy realized he was alone, save for a private sleeping next to the embers. He stepped on the last smoldering piece of wood and headed back for his tent, hoping he could catch an hour or two worth of sleep. Now that he knew which tent was hers he walked past to make sure she wasn't still sitting there. He let out a sigh of relief when he saw she wasn't.
He almost smiled to think that she had escaped from this world and gone to another through means of a dream-filled sleep, but frowned when her small, tortured sobs filled his ears.
A/N: The title 'Dead Hearts' was taken from the song Dead Hearts by the band, Stars. I highly recommend it.