SURRENDER MY SOUL

Hello everybody, I've been so busy lately and bummed about the lack of Caryl on our televisions. The new trailer has given me hope, especially with Carol talking to someone about only having one night left, they could be dead tomorrow. I know it will not be what we want it to be and it'll probably be some bullshit of her trying to inspire Ezekiel to fight and not be a pussy but…this takes place in 8B, they are in the middle of All Out War. Obviously the characters do not belong to me, because if they did Caryl would be a power couple and sucking face on our screens. The italics are the inner thoughts. I decided not to reference anything regarding Carl and Carl's death because I'm not ready for that and I didn't want the sadness to be the tone of the story. This is probably gonna be a two-shot. The first part is a lot of dialogue and setting the scene, the second part will basically be all smut. Let me know if you enjoy this. Reviews are always welcome and appreciated. Love you all and Caryl on, baby!

Carol had finally arrived at Hilltop. She was exhausted and had lost count of how many hours straight she had been awake. She and Morgan had rescued Zeke and whatever other Kingdomers' they could find. Hilltop was the only logical location for them all to gather. Alexandria had been burnt to the ground and she was hoping that everyone would gather, at what she assumed, would now be "home base". Morgan, Ezekiel and the others were eating, Carol was not hungry. Her brain was always working, always planning, always watching, always ready. She can't remember the last time she felt any source of peace, maybe the prison?

She was outside sitting at the bench when she felt someone approaching, it was Morgan. "How you holding up? Any sign of the others?" She looked at Morgan, ready to give him a smart ass response and stopped herself, he was going through stuff and was in pain, too. "Not a peep, it's quiet, I used to like the quiet, now it just makes the thoughts in my head that much louder." She gave him a sideways smirk and they both just sat there staring at the sky. "Ezekiel wanted me to get you, wants to talk to you. He didn't say about what." Carol rolled her eyes and stood up, "don't wanna keep his majesty waiting". She placed her hand on Morgan's arm for a beat and then headed towards the main building to see what Ezekiel wanted.

As she was walking she heard one of the guards yelling. At first she thought it was the Saviors approaching but these were shouts of excitement. As the gates opened she saw him, she saw Daryl walking with Judith in his arms; the others were behind him but all she saw was him. It had been days since she had seen him and now she knew he was okay, he was alive. Before her mind could register her body's movements she realized she was running towards him with the biggest smile on her face. She needed to touch him and to see him, to make sure he was real. When Daryl realized she was there he set Judith down and caught Carol as she ran to him. They embraced, Daryl slightly picking her up off the ground. He kept her in his arms as she pulled back to look at him. They touched foreheads and simply held each other for a moment, he slid one of his hands up to grasp her face as the other stayed wrapped around her. He adjusted her head to where she was now staring into his eyes, "you good?" he asked. She responded "I'm here" and they smiled at each other. Daryl continued to hold her face and her hip as he slowly began leaning towards her, he was under her spell. She looked down to his lips and back into his eyes, he licked his lips as his face inched closer to hers. Rick beginning to talk pulled her from her trance. Was Daryl about to kiss her?

He released her and their haze was lifted, the moment fleeting. Carol leaned down to hug and kiss Judith. The little girl was growing up so fast. Daryl picked Judith back up and wrapped his arm around Carol as Rick began to talk to the group and catch everyone up on what had happened and what the plan was. Everyone would get something to eat, get cleaned up, and rest for the next couple of days. They were continuing their war in 3 days, they had to wait for Oceanside and another group that had been on a run to return. The group began to disperse, everyone going their own way for the evening. The sun was beginning to set as Carol remembered that Ezekiel wanted to see her.

LATER THAT EVENING:

She opened the door to a bustling crowd, spotting Ezekiel in the dining area she walked over to him. She came to a stop in front of him, crossing her arms "Morgan said you wanted to see me". He looked broken, defeated. He looked up at her and simply nodded then spoke "is there somewhere we can go that is a little quieter than out here?" Carol had just been saying how she hated the quiet and here he was wanting to go somewhere quieter. He didn't wait on her to answer, he rose and nodded his head to indicate for her to walk in his general direction with him. They went into Gregory's office and Ezekiel shut the door. He began pacing and Carol just stood there waiting on him to speak.

"Why did you come back for me? Why did you save me?"

"It wasn't just me that saved you, Morgan helped me. It couldn't have been done without him. I came back for you because you needed saving. What, did you expect us to leave you? Even if you have given up hope and closed off yourself to the world, there are people that still care and that are still willing to fight."

He walked towards her and looked into her eyes, "what are you willing to fight for Carol?"

She hesitated, taking his question under consideration… "My family, that's the only thing left isn't it? Nothing is really right or wrong anymore, who is bad and who is good; the lines are so blurred. I'll have to answer for my sins one day, we all will. I just want to feel like I did everything in my power to save my family. I wanted to run from everything, to hide myself away. It worked for a while, but it's not who I am. I used to be a victim, I refuse to be that anymore. What's this really about Ezekiel?"

"You have saved me multiple times, you have given me comfort, you are a fiercely loyal human with a good heart and you are a beautiful woman. You could be a great leader."

Carol just stared at him, "I'm still not getting your point and why you wanted to see me."

"You make me want to be a better man, a better leader, a better person. You are the most amazing woman I have ever met. I could be an even better leader with you by my side." He got closer to her, and put his hands on either side of her arms. He began leaning into her. He's going to kiss me, this cannot be happening. As Ezekiel's eyes shut and his lips were a whisper from her own, Carol abruptly leaned away from him realizing what was taking place. He kept his hold on her and looked at her confused. "Ezekiel, I don't know what this is. I'm sorry if I misled you but this is not going to happen."

"We could be amazing together Carol, I know you have feelings for me; why else would you have saved me and said the things you said to me after Shiva died? I feel this connection between us, you're going to deny that? Just imagine the community we could have, and we could be a power couple. My people love you, I could lead again, with you by my side" he stared at her waiting for a response. Carol was stunned speechless. What would she have to say to get him to understand she had no romantic feelings for this man, whatsoever? "Ezekiel, I don't feel anything for you but friendship, I'm sorry". She had already seen Tobin earlier, she really did not need this right now. Tobin had not understood anything about her, especially why she had felt she had to leave Alexandria. He accused her of abandoning him, did he not realize she had only used him? She told him she was sorry and that what was between them was no longer happening. She told him that she wanted to try and be "normal" with him, but it didn't work. He began acting like a child, almost to the point of throwing a tantrum and had walked away from her without a word. "Carol, Carol, hello!" Carol had been so focused on her discussion with Tobin earlier she had completely forgotten that she was now having a discussion with Ezekiel. And then it finally hit her full force. She was already taken, she could never have been with Tobin the way he wanted and she could never be with Ezekiel. There was no past or future with either of them because her heart belonged to Daryl, had for a long time. She decided the best way to deal with this was what she should've also done with Tobin, she began "Ezekiel, my heart is already taken; my whole heart. I gave it away a long time ago; it belongs to someone else and now it's time to confess." She was now in a wondrous daze, her mind was racing as she was trying to figure out a way to tell Daryl that she loved him, Ezekiel already forgotten.

She began walking towards the exit of the building, as she got outside her eyes landed on Daryl, across the way sitting at a picnic table, alone. This was it, it was now or never. She began walking towards him like she was on a mission, as her pace quickened she felt someone grab her arm. She turned around to find Ezekiel was back and trying to get her attention. When she looked back at the table, Daryl was gone. "What do you want Ezekiel? This conversation is over." He looked at her with desperation in his eyes, "please Carol give me a chance. I can be the man you need and the man you deserve." Was he freakin' serious? As Carol was about to answer him someone else chimed in. "I think the woman made her position pretty clear already, anything else you can handle yourself". It was Daryl, he hadn't disappeared, and he had come to her. He looked at her and did a small smirk, ignoring Ezekiel, he placed his hand around Carol's arm and began pulling her "can we talk?" She nodded her head and looked back at Ezekiel, "goodnight" and that was the last thing she said to him.

Daryl took her into one of the trailers off to the side near the gate. "He likes you" was all Daryl said to her as he closed the door. Carol remained silent trying to figure out what to say. She never had this problem with him before. "I told him I wasn't interested"

"Well he didn't seem to be taking the rejection very well. You lead him on?" Daryl asked looking over his shoulder at her.

Did he really pull her in here to be an ass? She couldn't figure out why all of a sudden he was getting defensive and questioning. "No, I didn't lead him on Daryl, he mistook my kindness and caring for something else."

"Do you care about him?"

"I do care for him, but I don't want to be involved with him. What's with all the questions? You said you wanted to talk to me, so talk to me." She was getting pissed. He was the one that had pulled her away, he was the one being an overprotective asshole. "I'm glad you are here and we are safe Daryl, I'm so tired. We could be dead tomorrow, all we have is the moment, right now, tonight. I'm sorry if I've caused you to be angry, I've just missed you." Carol began to rise to leave. I guess this isn't the time to tell him I love him, he's so angry, is he angry at me? Is he angry at Negan? I can't cause him anymore pain. Maybe it's not our time, it's never the right time. He didn't respond to anything she had said.

He began pacing back and forth, seeing Carol at the gates, the security of her being in his arms. It felt so right. They kept finding each other. What if they ran out of chances? They only have tonight. They keep getting pulled apart, what if their nine lives eventually ran out? He cannot leave this world without knowing what it would be like to touch her skin, to taste her lips, or to feel her heat. Fuck it

He stormed towards her and locked her against the wall before she could leave him again. He had his hands locked on either side of her head, they were nose to nose. She saw the pure want in his eyes, and he saw something in hers. He had seen that look before…

Daryl flashbacks to the prison
He wanted to go to her then. Merle was always right, he was a wuss, he could never be a man that would take what he wanted. He wanted Carol, he had wanted her since he saw her plunge that ax into her husband's skull. He could never sleep, one night at the prison he was wandering and ended up in front of Carol's cell. He heard soft noises coming from her cell, as he got closer and stood in the shadows he saw that she was not having a bad dream. There was Carol, lying on her cot with her panties stretched between her legs that were pulled up towards her abdomen; her hand buried between her legs. Her legs were opened as wide as her panties would stretch. All he could see was her hand working and her naked breasts heaving with her aroused breathing, glistening with sweat. He couldn't take his eyes from her. Her head was rolled to the side with her face towards him but her eyes were closed, her nostrils flared and her mouth was slightly opened. She would bite her bottom lip along with the hitches in her breathing. The noises she would make, the hitch in her breathing, he wanted to be the cause of the sweet noises coming from her body. He stood in the shadows like a silent guardian and a silent pervert. He wanted her under him, he had fantasized a million times of what she would look like, feel like, smell like. She looked even better than he imagined. Her breasts were perfect, her mouth… and all of a sudden her mouth was in an "O" shape and she began shaking. She had just cum in front of Daryl and it was the sexiest thing he had ever seen.

He wanted to go to her, climb on her and claim her as his. What am I doing? We aren't animals. He swore to himself that evening he would never be good enough for her, he couldn't possibly be what she needed. Who was she thinking about as she pleasured herself? He went back to his cell and was wide awake with a massive erection, he stroked himself to oblivion imagining it was Carol's delicate hand wrapped around him and not his own. He fell asleep rapidly after he came with dreams of his woman.

The next morning he awoke and went to the kitchen. Carol had prepared breakfast and when she looked at him as she handed him his breakfast plate her eyes were filled with lust and passion, for him. Did she know he wanted her, was she thinking of him last night as he watched her? That morning he made a promise to himself, he couldn't be her protector and her lover. He had to make a choice. He loved her too much to lose her. He decided he would distance himself and watch out for her, he would be her man of honor. The next day he returned from a run to find her gone, Rick had banished her and he thought he'd never see her again.

Back to the present
Her eyes looked just like they had that morning in this moment. He couldn't let the moment get away from him again. "I don't want to talk Carol, you know I'm not good with words. All I want to do is this…"
and he kissed her.