This fic is inspired by and based on Yoshizilla-Rhedosaurus's Life At Pizza Hut, a fic I'm over 800 chapters behind in, but I have enjoyed what I've read of it immensely so far. May you all enjoy the farty goodness!
Flatulent Army Rip Twice, by Dickfart
One day Amy Rose and Rouge went to the Pizza Hut in Station Square, where their good friend Silver the Hedgehog was being harassed by Shadow the Hedgehog for not putting enough cheesy garlic bread on his pizza.
"My, my," said Rouge, sauntering her flattering jean-clad hips right in Shadow's direction. "I do love a man who knows what he wants and takes charge."
"R-really?" said Shadow, blushing.
"The way you bully Silver makes me really, really..."
"Yes?"
Just as they were about to kiss, Knuckles fell through the ceiling and landed on his fists. Then he charged toward Silver and punched his face, assuming that if he bullied Silver better than Shadow did then Rouge would love him instead.
Rouge took one look at the echidna and giggled. Then she ignored him again, and you could see two anime tear lines pouring down his face.
"Now, where were we?" she said, her slender fingers rubbing Shadow's white chest fluff up and down. Shadow swallowed, entranced with this gorgeous woman in skin tight jeans. She leaned in close, and once he puckered up his lips to kiss her, she suddenly shoved his head deep into her butt and ripped a massive fart.
A great shiver thundered through his lean body, and then he fell down while screaming.
"Nice!" said Knuckles. "I knew you wouldn't leave me for another man. Give daddy some sugar."
"Tee hee. Gladly," said Rouge, who leaned in to Knuckles now. He puckered, and she jammed his top pucker into her bottom pucker, unleashing a tuba fart right into his wide open snout. It smelled like eggs and rotten cabbage. Now he too was writhing and wheezing on the floor.
"Pizza Hut?" said Vector. "More like Pizza Butt. Right Silver?"
"I think my ndose is brokend. Can I go to the hospital?" said Silver.
"Not until you finish making pizzas!"
Silver grumbled, cooking more pizzas with tissue shoved deep into his nose. That couldn't be entirely sanitary, but who cares about such extraneous detail? This is fanfiction, not classic literature.
"And that, my dear sweet girl," said Rouge, placing her hand on Amy's shoulder. "-is how you get a man to like you."
"Wow!" said Amy. "I'll enough fried cheese and eggrolls to get my gut gurgling. Then I'll shove Sonic into my butt and fart as hard as I can! Oh, he'll HAVE to love me then!"
"That's my girl!" said Rouge, smiling as Amy eagerly ordered and awaited the massive ton of food that'd turn her cute poots into something explosive enough to make Sonic fall in love with her.
to be continued?