Graduation: last chance
Graduation. It was just around the corner. There wasn't much time left... for anything. Every one was rushing around preparing final speeches, the last assembly, farewell gifts, dinners, breakfasts, everything was happening all at once. But Kanda wasn't overwhelmed. No. He was... complacent. How should we put this. Disinterested, calm, uncaring- no scratch that, he cared he just didn't look like he cared, dispassionate (great word that one say, it out loud) he'd finally made it through his high school adventures and for what? What had he done, what had he learned? As he sat alone under the cool shade of a tree on this one breezy, sunny day he pondered on the point of school. Where was he going to use this shit...?
He's a little naïve really...
But he thought back to his pointless existence- though he wasn't in the lightest bit depressed, just pondering with the cruel truth- and couldn't pick out any thing that really stood out to him; that made his life really worth remembering. He only had three friends, had just barely scraped a passing 'c' grade in order to graduate, never joined any clubs, and although he went to the ball, he just sat there pretending not to enjoy himself. But he had.
And that was it. He had enjoyed himself; he just couldn't remember all those times. So this was his last chance to do something memorable. But what should he do? So he did a very "un-Kanda-like" thing to do. He sat up and actually thought. Okay so he does think normally but he didn't have to this time, he just was; as though it actually mattered to him.
Leaning against the tree with his eyes closed people wouldn't realise what he was thinking, or that he was actually thinking at all, they would probably walk past and think that he had fallen asleep because he had been studying all night long. Pfft studying. Yeah right!
But his three only friends knew better. Yu Kanda didn't sleep in public! But they probably didn't expect him to be reminiscing... and they never knew.
"Hey Kanda!" came the forever cheerful voice of the Rabbit. He heard three bodies hit the grass around him. A heavy sigh from the one to his left and he opened his eyes, barely, to look at his friends. This was the only acknowledgement they would receive, but they were used to it.
"What are you thinking about Kanda?" asked the one who had sighed.
Dammit how does he know everything? It's like those annoying silver eyes just go right through you.
"Che. Who said I was thinking about anything?"
"Well I wasn't meaning- you just looked like you were thinking about something okay" god he was so easy to rile up, and he finished mumbling to himself; "sorry I asked."
Kanda quirked an eyebrow at the smaller white haired boy. He had shadows under his eyes; some one had been studying hard. This confused Kanda a little. Why would the bean need to study anyway? He still had another year to go so his exams didn't even matter! Lenalee, a pretty Asian girl sitting across from the other Asian, seemed to have noticed Allen's tired look as well as she addressed him;
"Allen! You look worn out! What were you doing last night?"
"Yeah Allen," Lavi piped up. He had flaming red hair, a bandana, and an eye patch. Need I say more? He was one of a kind! "You shouldn't be studying so hard cause you don't even need to!"
"I know I know. I just get a little stressed sometimes."
"You don't need to know everything." Kanda added; a little, a little¸ sympathetically, causing the white haired boy to look at him with bright eyes.
The long haired Asian boy had known for quite some time that the younger had held a deep respect for him. It was like he held Kanda on a podium. Not really he didn't worship the ground he stood on or anything. It was more that Allen sort of looked to him to be some sort of role model, and Kanda couldn't help but feel that he'd let him down. He couldn't see himself as anything of the role model sort but then again maybe the white haired teen was looking at a different aspect. However it was only lately that he had started to notice that perhaps it was something a little more.
He couldn't help but feel odd the way his young friend looked at him. I mean, they're both guys. But eventually his suspicions were confirmed when his red head rabbit came to him one day and they discussed this "guy love." However they had been in desperate need of Lenalee's help. So they sought her out. Kana had never before directly asked for help. But he did, just this once.
Though the Chinese girl was far more help than the bunny, Kanda still found himself struggling over a solution. Restraining himself from strangling his friend, he made his mind up to ignore the younger student, and his... feelings. But it was a hard thing to do when it was staring at you in the face with big, bulging eyes, sitting cutely with the sun shining off his hair.
Yes; unwillingly to say the least, our Samurinja boy found himself actually liking the bean in a similar way. Though he could never show it, nor ever admit it directly to himself, let alone anyone else; he did.
And that was when it came to him; his way out of high school. The one thing he could remember his time here by. And he almost smiled. But didn't.
"Yeah Allen sheesh if you stressed anymore what colour would your hair turn to?"
"What's that supposed to mean?!" he growled and launched himself at Lavi.
Oh yes. Graduation was going to be sweet.
And the day arrived. The final assembly, through which Kanda sat at the back and closed his eyes; not listening. Lavi was bouncing on the chair beside him, excited about their final farewell. Kanda didn't show it, but he was excited as well. To be free- well almost, the suffering, painfully long hours of exams still awaited them. But it was the prospect of not being attached to this silly foundation any longer. Also nervously excited of what he was about to do; when the time was right!
Cheers, laughter, wolf whistles and shuffling bodies and feet. The assembly was over. The time was drawing near. All of the students were outside on the school oval as the senior students made their sentimental farewell. And for once Kanda didn't mind the sentimental bull shit that was currently being shoved down his throat.
This was his last chance.
As a symbolism of letting go and moving on from school. All of the graduating class were given a white helium balloon, which at the given time; after the countdown; they would release in order for it to fly away. And once again they would all cheer and hug and scream and cry and take photos.
The time came. As Kanda let go of the balloon, he couldn't help but think of something else that was white, that he was going to let go of, he was actually starting to feel a little sad. The screams began.
Kanda was being jostled around as his fellow classmates screamed and cheered and jumped around. The other (non-graduating) students rushed into the group of year twelves. Running to their older friends; getting in one last hug.
Over the cries and screams of sadness and joy combined; Kanda heard his name.
"Kanda! Kanda!" he knew that voice, the voice he had been waiting for. And he glanced briefly at the sky, which was consuming the last white balloons, before looking towards the smiling face running towards him.
This was it.
Allen ran through the cheering crowd, squeezing passed hugging bodies and finally to Kanda. And for once Kanda didn't reject his hug. He embraced the younger boy and before either of them could do anything more; grabbed his slender shoulders and kissed him.
The world was spinning. The sun was shining brightly. The colourful bodies of their classmates were twisting and jumping about them. And the two of them stood there together, locked. Kanda gripping Allen tightly; Allen with his arms still half way around the other. The kiss went on romantically forever. And although they had their eyes closed they could see eternity. Everything was just perfect for that heart splitting moment, as their worlds became nothing but movement and sound, and nothing mattered except for them, and their bubble.
Finally the released each other from their bond; dizzy and giddy, and stared into the other eyes. The younger of the two looked shocked, if happy. And Kanda couldn't help but feel a little embarrassed of his bold act. And he turned away in order find his other friends, trying to pretend it didn't matter: that what he had wanted to do was done, but it didn't mean anything. He walked away.
And now that he was walking through the crowd, leaving his beansprout behind; he felt sad. He never realised just how much he had liked the other boy, until it was too late.
Let it go Kanda. You've done it now. That's enough. He shook his head. That's enough now.
But suddenly two small arms reached around him from behind and looked down to see the object of his thoughts looking at him with eyes brimming with tears, despite the smile playing on his lips. Those lips.
Or maybe it wasn't enough.
The End!
A/N how's that eh?? Cute and corny and chocolate coated. I'm sorry if it's a little muddled but come on it's a Kanda thought process... sort of anyway I hope you liked it please review!!