Voices

The 12th Squad

'So you claim that you're hearing voices. Is that right, captain?'

'Exactly.'

'Interesting… How long have you been suffering from these… symptoms?'

'Excuse me?'

'I mean… How long have you had that problem?'

'As far as I can tell… for about a week.'

'And you are entirely sure that's not Shinigami Women's Association?'

'…'

'I beg your pardon, captain. Forgive me my boldness, but… how can you be so sure about it? I ask out of scientist's curiosity.'

'The voices are masculine.'

'…'

'I'm utterly sure about it.'

'…'

'I suppose there has to be a rational explanation of these happenings.' (

'Well… everything can be scientifically explained, captain. That's why our Bureau exists.'

'May I assume that you are going to investigate that?'

'Umm… It would be much easier if you could tell us a little more about the… nature of these voices. If possible.'

'…'

'Yes…?'

'They sound really… satisfied. If I make myself clear.'

'Let me make myself sure… Satisfied as someone who has just received additional funds for their research?'

'No. Definitely not.'

'Ummm… You can't mean…'

'That's exactly what I mean.'

'And both voices are masculine?'

'…'

'And… You are absolutely sure, that you have slept well lately, captain? Or maybe you have overworked yourself? Or engaged yourself in some stressful situations perhaps?'

'How am I supposed to interpret that?'

'Well… You know, captain… such things just… happen. Lots of stress, too many duties, lack of sleep… Maybe the Fourth Squad could…'

'I lack sleep only because of inexplicable sound phenomena occurring in my mansion. And I warn you that any further remarks considering my mental health will face… consequences.'

'Of course, captain.'

'I would be really grateful though for some effective remedy for insomnia. If you have anything to offer in that matter, that is.'

'Oh, captain Mayuri will undoubtedly take care of you pers-…'

'I'd rather ask captain Unohana for advice'.

'As you wish, captain, of course. I promise you that the Twelfth Squad will solve that case as soon as possible.'

'I would be… most obliged. And… one more thing.'

'Yes, captain?'

'Find my koi carp already.'

***

The 4th Squad

'Oh, it's an honour to see you, captain. What brings you here?'

'I've been suffering from insomnia. For a week.'

'I see… Any… specific reasons behind that?'

'I hear voices.'

'Voices?'

'Voices.'

'Umm, I see. What kind of voices, if I may ask?'

'Masculine.'

'Masculine… So that's not Shinigami Women's Association. And it has lasted for…?'

'A week. As I've already said.'

'Yes, of course. And, if I may ask, have you took other… factors into consideration?'

'I'm not overworked. And I'm not stressed out. Yet. The only thing is that I cannot sleep because somebody keeps disturbing my peace.'

'Voices?'

'That's pretty obvious, I think.'

'And is there anything… special about them?'

'…'

'Yes?'

'They suggest some particular… activities.'

'Activities…?'

'That's right.'

'I… I see. Have you reported that to anyone, captain?'

'The 12th Squad promised to take care of that matter. I can only hope they will be more efficient than in the koi case.'

'Koi…? Oh yes, I remember now… In that case maybe… maybe you would like to move to our, umm, barracks for some time, captain? The Twelfth would investigate the phenomena in your mansion, and you… could rest peacefully.'

'…'

'Of course, I didn't mean to force anything on you…'

'I value my privacy…'

'Undoubtedly…'

'…but if it could favourably affect the efficiency of commanding my squad…'

'Oh, certainly…'

'I demand peace…'

'Obviously…'

'And quiet.'

' I promise to ensure you that.'

'Also, if there is such a possibility, I would like a room afar from others.'

'Oh, but of course, captain. If you are seeking solitude then we can definitely guarantee you that. I will give orders to prepare our best apartment for you. In our closed ward.'