Chapter 1- EPOV

The summer of 1991. The best times of my life happened in that summer. 21 years old, just out of college, with the whole world at my feet. That summer I was in a band, Spinnerbait, and we were touring the country, playing in pubs and clubs.

That's how I met her. Isabella Swan, though she preferred Bella. She was the best thing ever to happen to me, yet also she was the downfall of the band.

She worked as a barmaid in the state of North Dakota, we played in the bar she worked in, Joey's Palace. I can't honestly say why she chose to talk to me, or how we ended up dating, I suppose the only one who has the answer to that is Bella herself.

And I fell in love with her quickly. Everything I did was for Bella, she may not have known it, but it was true. I was young, naive and passionately in love. A deadly combination.

She quit her job in the bar, and travelled with me and the other Spinnerbait members, Emmett and Jake, to South Dakota, Montana, Wyoming and Nebraska. We spent every moment we could together. It was a fiery relationship, we often had rows, usually after drinking. But we always made up in the space of a few hours. "The I love you- I hate you couple" as Jake once nicknamed us.

Even then, I'd always known I was the luckiest guy in the world to have Bella. So beautiful, caring, stubborn. I can still see her heart-shaped face and wide chocolate brown eyes in my memories, the face I'd never forget as long as I lived.

-Flashback-

"There's my girl!" I said as Bella walked towards us, her tiny hips swaying seductively. She smiled softly. We were playing in Wyoming that night, and Jake and I were taking the equipment from my rusty old 1981 BMW.

"Aww Bella, don't you look lovely today? Why the hell does someone like you go out with a loser like Edward? Come out with me and I'll show you a good time." Jake said jokingly, and I punched his arm playfully.

"No thanks, Jake. Maybe some other time, yeah?" She tapped his face twice as she past,"Hey." She said to me, biting her full pink bottom lip that was just a little out of balance with her top lip, restraining a smile.

"Hey, how are you?" I asked, kissing her lips softly.

"Much better now, thanks." She wrapped her thin arms around my neck as I snaked mine around her waist. We kissed again before being interrupted by Emmett, who was just signing the contract with the bar manager.

"Oi, Romeo, put her down and give us a hand with this stuff." Emmett shouted, and I heard the smile in his voice.

I put my forehead to hers,"Better go." I whispered.

"Hmm." She murmured without moving, I touched my lips to hers again.

"Yeah, I did mean sometime before the millennium." Emmett yelled again. We finally broke apart and Bella picked up a drum from next to the BMW, ready to take it to Emmett and Jake.

"Bella, you don't need to do that, Me, Em and Jake can do it." I protested weakly, but knowing Bella, she'd do it anyway.

"I don't want to sit around doing nothing." She walked towards the guys,"Plus I'm stronger than all of you put together!" She stuck her little tongue out at me and went to Emmett. I smiled at how well she fit in with us, as though she'd always been a part of the band, and how lucky I was to have a girl like her, before following her inside.

-End Flashback-

Those were the best days of my life, those hazy summer days with Bella. It all ended of course, as all the good things do.

The last concert of the little-known band Spinnerbait was played in Nebraska, July 10th 1991. Bella said she wasn't feeling well and didn't actually go to the gig, I was worried all night about her and she was in bed when I got back to the cheap hotel we were staying in. I went to sleep quickly, exhausted from the gig.
By the morning everything of hers was gone, clothes, make up, hairbrush. All that was left was a note and all the things I'd bought her:

Dear Edward,

I'm so sorry, I have to leave, and I'm sorry I can't say goodbye properly, but this is the best I can do. I will always love you, remember that. One day you'll understand that I'm doing this for you,and if we ever meet again, I'll explain it, but for now, Goodbye Edward, I'm so sorry.

Yours eternally,
Bella.

I can't remember how many times I've re-read that note, trying to find some sense to it. I've kept it with me always, everywhere I go, it's sad and pathetic but I still believed that one day we'll meet.

I've racked my brains for years, trying to find something, anything, that should have warned me that she wasn't happy or that she wanted to leave, but there was nothing to find, apart from the sickness before that last concert, there was nothing, she seemed happy and comfortable, but then who was I to judge?

After she left, Spinnerbait disbanded. There was arguments, massive rows. I was in emotional meltdown, and I couldn't write any new songs, the guys yelled at me. They were sympathetic to my situation, but they didn't understand how deeply I loved Bella, and how distraught I was when she left.

It was almost as though we all needed Bella, like she was the glue that held us together.

Still, that was seventeen years ago, I was now thirty-eight, single and not even bothering with relationships anymore. I'd had girlfriends before and a few after Bella, but they never matched up to the perfection of Bella, and I found myself constantly comparing them to her, and of course they never got close. So my love-life stopped after a few girlfriends after Bella. And I was happier that way.

Spinnerbait kept in touch for a while, but eventually we grew apart each doing different things with our lives. The last I'd heard, Jake was going steady with a girlfriend and working as a manager for a company that made guitars and Emmett was single and working as a personal trainer. The last time I'd contacted them was at least four years ago. I suddenly felt as though it was time for a Spinnerbait reunion, I just hoped they kept their mobile numbers since then.

I dragged out my phonebook and looked up Jake first, He answered on the second ring.

"Hello?" He said.

"Jake, hey, it's Edward."

I heard him gasp."Edward, how are you? I haven't spoken to you in- Hold on a minute" He said, I waited. I faintly heard him say, "Ruby, put that down, you're having tea soon."

"But Daddy.." a little girl's voice said, I smiled, Jake, a Dad. He used to call himself 'The Lone Wolf', not anymore apparently.

"No buts." He said finally,"Sorry Edward, how are you?" He said into the phone.

"I'm great, Jake. Listen, how would you feel about a Spinnerbait reunion?" I asked.

"I'm there." He said and I laughed,"When?"

"Maybe, this afternoon? If you can."

"Of course, I'll be in town anyway, with the girls, so what about Starbucks on Union Road at three?" He asked.

"Sure, I'll call Emmett now. Good to speak to you again, Jake, I'll see you later."

"Bye Ed." He hung up

I smiled, one down, one to go. I found Emmett in my phone book and put the numbers into the phone, less hesitantly than with Jake. Even if Emmett couldn't go, it would be great just to talk to Jake himself.
"Hello?" Emmett answered on the fourth ring.

"Em? It's me, Edward."

"Eddie-boy! To what do I owe the pleasure?" He asked, as though it had been four days since we'd last spoken, not four years.

"Spinnerbait reunion. Today. If you want to come."

He seemed enthusiastic as he answered "Sure! I haven't seen Jake in years. When?"

"This afternoon, if you're not busy, Starbucks on Union road at three."

"Sure, I'll see you then."

"Bye Em."I smiled contentedly. I felt a lot better now, Spinnerbait was reuniting, even if only for a coffee.

It was five to three, and I sat in Starbucks, waiting for the guys to arrive.

Jake came in first, and we smiled widely at each other, he hadn't changed much at all, and it was comforting to see. He gave me a man-hug, and we sat down and ordered a coffee, then Emmett came in, big as a house, still the biggest out of all of us.

"Eddie-boy and Jakeipoo!" Emmett boomed loudly and hugged us both, we all laughed loudly and sat down.

We chatted nostalgically, I learnt Jake was now married with a little girl Ruby, who I'd heard on the phone, and one on the way and Emmett was engaged to a model called Rosalie.

Women in the coffee shop stared at us and it wasn't long until Emmett noticed.
"They're looking at you, Ed, get in and grab 'em, don't worry, we won't wait up." He winked at me.

I laughed it off,"Nah, I don't date." I said truthfully.

"Back in college, you were the ladies' man, what happened?" Emmett asked.

I looked down, "Bella happened", I wanted to answer but instead I said, "People change," seeing their unconvinced faces, I continued, "I mean look at you Jake, you always said you'd never get tied down, the lone wolf, you said, yet now you're married with two kids."
There was silence for a bit

"You're still cut up about Bella, aren't you?" Jake guessed.

"No" I lied.

Emmett shook his head,"Really, Edward, you've got to move on. She isn't coming back."

"Edward, Bella left you eighteen years ago, don't you think it's about time you got on with your life? Like she's probably done." Jake added unhelpfully.

"I am getting on with my life," I argued,"You two say this as though I sit around moping 24/7, I've got my first day as a music teacher tomorrow."

"You know that's not what we meant." Emmett sighed again,"Edward, I'm telling you this a a old friend, really, you have to get laid." He said this so seriously I burst out laughing and it wasn't long before they joined me.

We chatted about things other than Bella for the rest on the reunion, and when Jake announced that he had to pick Ruby up from his Mum's house we all sighed and stood up.

"Spinnerbait has to keep in touch this time." Emmett said, "Anytime you guys need anything, just give me a ring."

"You too." Jake and I said.

We all left and I went back to my apartment , throwing my jacket on the sofa and looking at Bella's note again, sighing. As I held it up to the light, I saw long-dried tear marks on the sheet that I never noticed before, maybe it was hard for Bella to leave me,I thought, then slapped myself internally, as if.

I fell asleep in front of the TV that night, and, as I did every night, dreamt of the sun-lit days I spent with Bella.

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