Title: Thoughts of Being Greater Have Fallen Short
Pairing: Steve/Tony.
Summary: Steve gets into work one morning, and finds that his boss has left him a very urgent voice mail, and not one he expects.
Universe: AU.
Rating: NC-17.
Warnings: The destruction of the Marvel time line, I would say.
Thoughts of Being Greater Have Fallen Short
Part I
The sun sits high in the air as Steve makes his way down the hall, dress shoes clicking uncomfortably along the way. Steve had always been a casual guy, he hadn't really known anything other then casual, but that had all changed, however, the day he went to work for Stark Industries. Steve passes Cheryl's desk, nodding in her wake and saying a quick hello as he punches in his code. What had possessed him to apply for the position as Tony Stark's personal assistant, he'll never know, but he hadn't really expected to get the job. While Steve was tall, blonde and had dazzling blue eyes, he was most certainly not a woman.
The reasoning behind Tony hiring him had never been discussed, and Steve hadn't ask. Steve had only wanted to try something different, do something other then he had, and Tony Stark was definitely something different. Steve opens the blinds adjacent from his desk, allowing the natural light to display around the room, he tried to do most of his work under this condition, artificial lighting hurt his eyes. Steve sets down the latest file, and notices that his office phone shows that a new message is waiting for him. Steve's brows furrow, the only person who called him on his office phone tended to be Tony, and it was certainly much too early in the day for him to have called, let alone leave a message.
Steve tugs at the cuff of his suit, a habit he had picked up, as he peers down at the phone. Steve, against his better judgement, presses play. Tony's urgent voice coming through the speaker. "Steve, listen, I'm in Vegas. The strippers, look, the strippers they stole all of my money...and clothes, and okay, they stole just about everything except the family jewels. I'm held up at the Bellagio, and need you to do something very important." Steve frowns, startled as Tony's voice continues. "Don't look like that! I can't tell Pepper, okay, so just listen. You tell Jarvis to allow you into my vault, there's a brief case down there, a very important brief case, and I need you to bring it to me, okay? Also, grab the Armani suit, the gray one with the pinstripes...and some underwear while your at it, or not, I don't care, just get here, and call me!"
Steve stood, unsure what to do. Vegas, really? Steve stares down at his ridiculously expensive suit, the one Tony had tailored for him. Steve pulls out his cell phone, the damn thing was complicated to work, and Tony had since become convinced that Steve was raised Amish, and Steve has never said anything to the contrary. Steve leaves his office, hurrying pass Cheryl, he doesn't even acknowledge the elderly woman as he half walks half runs to the private elevator, punching in yet another code. Once inside, he presses the call button, awaiting Jarvis to answer on the secure line over at Tony's mansion.
He wanted different, he got different.
"Jarvis!"
"Yes, Mr. Rogers?"
"I need the access code to the vault, uh, Tony's gotten himself into another mess."
"Right away, sir."
The elevator dings, and Steve hurries out of it, the damn things had always terrified him. Steve rushes into the customized work shop, phone flipped open as he presses one, Tony having refused to be anything less. "Steve, what took you so long?" Tony's voice blares into his ear drum.
"You didn't give me much notice, Mister Stark. I'm in the shop now, and I've got the case."
"Good, get here as fast as you can. I'm in suite 30056," Tony says before the line goes dead, and Steve lets out a frustrated sigh.
Steve, instead of making a quick exit, goes back to his office, grabbing a case of his own before heading out. Cheryl asks if anything is wrong, and Steve has to bite down the urge to say everything. Instead, he tells the woman with thick framed glasses that he has a important errand to run, and to direct any calls to his voice mail. She nods, not giving it a second thought. Steve can't remember how many times she has referred to him as a good boy, her words not his. Steve shakes his head as he enters the public elevator everyone else uses, if only she knew.
The doors are almost completely shut when a foot dressed in a black six inch heel stops them in their tracks. Steve grimaces, he was hoping Pepper wouldn't have caught wind of him just yet. He smiles at her, but she doesn't look amused. "What has he done now?"
"I'm going to Vegas...strippers they, um, they stole everything."
Pepper's head tilts up, a sigh pursing through her lips. "Find him, and then kick his ass. I'm serious, and if he wants to fire you, tell him it was a direct order from me," she says as the elevator dings, and she practically shoves him out.
"Okay," Steve says, because well, he doesn't know what else to say.
:::
Steve was well prepared to take a plane out to Vegas, but Tony had called to make sure he took the jet, and what Tony wanted, he got. Steve sits in the overpriced means of transportation, attempting to relax, but finding it rather difficult. Why would Tony need this specific brief case, why was it at Stark Industries, for that matter? Steve tosses his head back, sighing as he rubbed his fingers along his temples, it didn't matter. Tony did a lot of things that didn't make sense to anyone but himself, and besides, Steve figures, everyone had their fair share of secrets—he knew he sure did.
The jet lands some odd five hours later, and Steve does his best to remember the difference in time zones. He hails down a cab, and heads directly towards the Bellagio, making sure he has everything he needs. The moment Steve announces he is there for Mister Stark, a odd chill runs down along his spine, and he has to do his best to ignore the gut feeling he gets in response. Steve smiles at the receptionist, her red hair curling near her chin, she smiles in return, but it almost appears forced. Steve doesn't waste anymore of her time, he figures she is just having a off day.
Steve gets into the elevator, upset that this is the fourth time in one day that he has to use one. Steve presses the button that will take him to the top, closing his eyes and cringing as the numbers creep higher and higher. If there was anyone Steve disliked more then Tony Stark right now, he couldn't think of them. The elevator comes to a jolting halt, and Steve can feel his stomach drop as the doors open, and he steps out. Steve feels as though he is going around in circles, no matter how hard he searches, he cannot seem to find suite 30056.
30050, 30052, 30054, but no 30056. Steve pauses mid-step, one hand on his hip and two heavy brief cases in the other, what the hell was going on? Steve doesn't have very long to ponder the answer to that question as two large hands grip his shoulders, tossing him onto the ground. Steve lands on his back with a thud out of pure surprise, ears ringing as he makes out a blurred male figure above him. "I'll be taking that," the man announces, reaching for Tony's brief case.
"Are you trying me to get me fired?" Steve questions, kicking the man hard in the shin. Steve takes both cases into his hand, using them to hit his attacker across the back of the head. A gunshot rocks him, and as he runs he nearly trips, turning down the hall, he collides face to face with a very naked Tony Stark.
"Steve, where the hell have you been?" Tony yells.
"Me? Where the hell is 30056?" Steve yells right back, standing to his feet, and ducking behind a large food cart that had been abandoned as another shot rings out.
"Natasha, relax on the gun fire, will you?" Steve hears the man who attacked him just seconds ago say. "Were suppose to be discreet, remember?"
"And how's that working out for you?" A woman's voice replies, and Steve notices she sounds a awful lot like the unpleasant receptionist he had encountered upon entering.
"Who are they?" Steve whispers, and Tony doesn't acknowledge him as he looks around.
"My room. My room is missing," he says, baffled.
"Yes, I know! Who are they?"
"S.H.I.E.L.D," Tony admits, and Steve's neck almost snaps as he turns around to look at the man he works for, quickly looking away again with a hint of a blush as he remembers that Tony is completely naked.
"What does S.H.I.E.L.D want with you?" Steve inquires, trying to keep quiet as the two agents argue amongst themselves.
"I know I came from somewhere around...there. Oh, I see, come on," Tony urges, completely disregarding Steve's question, if he even heard it. Tony had a real knack for not listening.
Steve feels awkward running behind his naked boss, bare ass in plain view, but quickly decides that his life is so much more important then him being some sort of prude. Tony stops in front of a sign titled 'Janitors Closet', and Steve is briefly confused as Tony turns the knob, unveiling a embellished suite.
"If this is where the janitor stays, I can only imagine what your room must look like," Steve jests, but Tony merely glares at him.
"Did you bring my clothes?" he asks, and Steve has to roll his eyes, because of course he did.
"You didn't say why S.H.I.E.L.D is after you," Steve brings up once Tony has returned from the bathroom, fully clothed. Steve isn't sure how much good the two dressers and bed frame were going to do them, but it gave them just enough time to half-ass some sort of escape plan.
"That, my friend, is why," Tony responds, pointing towards the brief case Steve had trudged all the way from New York.
Steve had figured as much. "What's in it?"
"That is something I hope you never find out," Tony says, and Steve frowns. How was he suppose to know what side Tony was on if he couldn't get the other man to give him a straight answer?
Steve shakes his head, slightly annoyed. "How do you plan to get us out of here?" he questions, waving his hand around in the air.
"How am I suppose to get us out of here?"
"Yes, you. You're the one that got us into this mess. They're going to find us eventually, Mister Stark."
"They already know where we are, Steve, they're just trying to figure out how to go about capturing me...us," and Tony's face falls at his correction, and Steve can't quite place the look on his face.
Tony is silent for a moment, but sighs wearily. "Can you keep a secret?"
"Yes."
"No, really, can you? If you can't, I have this device, you see..."
"Jesus, Tony, yes," Steve says, and he mentally reprimands himself for calling Tony by his first name out loud, but the other man doesn't seemed bothered.
Tony walks cautiously over to the case, almost as if he distrusts the thing, or Steve, but either way, Steve can't help but to stare in complete awe as Tony Stark, his boss, is shrouded in armor. Tony Stark is Iron Man. Steve swallows hard, attempting to wrap his head around this information. Pepper had not mentioned that little fact. "You look weird like that. Stop doing that thing with your face," Tony commands, and Steve does stop, but only to replace the odd look with a angry expression.
"She did not tell me you were Iron Man," Steve bites, and he was going to have a very long, detailed, talk with a Miss Potts as soon as he got back to New York.
"What? Where are you going?" Tony shouts as Steve leaves to the rest room, his own case in tow.
A white star stands out amongst the blue of his costume, and Steve sighs, he thought he would never have to be this person again, but apparently that just wasn't the case. When Steve reappears, any semblance of well practiced awkwardness is erased, and he stands in the middle of the room as the American hero he is. While he can't see Tony's expression, the lack of movement is proof enough of his surprise. "You're Captain America," he says, voice filtered by his suit of armor.
"Yes, I am."
"Tony...we've waited long enough, and if you don't open this door and surrender, you know Natasha is just going to get more and more impatient until she can't control herself." The agent warns.
Tony's faceplate opens as he moves closer towards the door. "Shut up you purple wearing cross dresser, you told me I had pretty eyes."
Steve raises a brow, unseen by his cowl. "He was the stripper?"
"Are you really that surprised?"
Steve shakes his head. "No."
Tony shuts his faceplate, and Steve readies himself for a onslaught of S.H.I.E.L.D agents, but a loud explosion throws the both of them through and out of the adjacent window. Steve absolutely hates the feeling of falling, and he closes his eyes, knowing he is mere seconds away from hitting the ground. Steve, however, never collides with the unforgiving concrete beneath him. Instead, his arm is yanked above his head as Tony keeps a vice-like grip on his wrist. Steve's heart is racing, but he smiles confidently at the other hero, glad to know that Tony won't allow him to die. "Thanks," Steve says appreciatively.
"Don't mention it," Tony says, hoisting Steve higher. Steve's foot rests atop of his as Tony's arm wraps securely around the mid of his waist. "That wasn't S.H.I.E.L.D."
"I figured as much," Steve responds, and they don't have to wait very long as another explosion sounds off, and a metallic figure appears.
"How many of them are there?" Tony questions as they both peer at Ultron in his latest form.
Steve doesn't care about that right now, all he knows is that innocent people were in trouble, and it was his job to protect them to the best of his abilities. Through the gaping hole in the building, Steve can make out one of the two agents that had been after both he and Tony. "I'm useless up here, grab him, and I'll take over down there," Steve says, and it's a command, leaving absolutely no room for Tony to argue.
"So you don't want to talk about the time you kissed me, then?" Tony inquires as they move quickly through the air, dodging concussion blasters along the way. "Not really, no."
"Later, then."
"You, Purple Stardust, the man with the pasties, hop on!" Tony shouts, and Steve can't help but to shake his head in dismay, again.
"The name's Hawkeye, Tin Man," he shouts, bow in hand as he stares sceptically at the both of them.
"We're not the bad guys here," Steve reassures him, offering the man in purple a hand.
Hawkeye takes it, not seeing any choice, and soon they're all three on the ruined sight of the Bellagio. "We'll cover ground. Hawkeye, you move as many victims out of danger as possible, the same goes for your partner if you can find her. I'll handle the...other Ultron bots?" Steve finishes, a legion of alternate Ultron bodies marching up the street all at once.
"The rest of S.H.I.E.L.D is on their way. I'll take as many as I can, when I can," Hawkeye announces, making a break for it.
"You think you can handle him?"
"I've dealt with him before."
Steve pauses, hesitant. "Be careful, you sign my paycheck."
Tony's head tilts to the side. "As long as you're careful down here, you pick up my dry cleaning."
Steve nods his head, and Tony takes off into the sky. Steve prepares himself, throwing his shield strategically, taking out four bots with a single throw. Their armor is nothing compared to the prime Ultron, made out of steel, they fall quickly, but not without damaging the surrounding area. The Bellagio had taken too much damage, it was minutes away from collapsing, and to make matters worse, people were still trapped inside with no way out. Tony getting thrashed around and hardly able to dodge Ultron's attacks didn't help anything, either.
Steve took out another row of bots before making a dash for the Bellagio, white webbing appearing out of no where, blocking him from entering. "I wouldn't go in there," a voice says, and Steve turns to see Spiderman standing directly behind him.
"I've got the people on the lower level, and the big, thunder guy over there has the top half," he says, and Steve merely backs off, as long as they were taken care of, Steve didn't mind not being wanted.
The Hulk was in the midst of smashing the lesser Ultron bots as Hawkeye and the agent he only knew as Natasha moved all of the injured, destroying enemies as they went. Steve looks to the sky, dismayed to see Tony, once again, on the defensive. There was no way Tony was going to be able to stop him like that. Steve made the decision to run up to the Hulk, the green giant almost smashing him in the process. "I need you to throw me," he says, and at first, the Hulk simply doesn't do anything.
"Listen, fellow, you need to throw me at Ultron!" he commands, and the Hulk pauses briefly before sending Steve through the air like a rag doll.
Steve hopes that if he can't damage Ultron, to at least provide Tony with a bit of a distraction. Steve uses the edge of his shield to strike under the hinge of Ultron's jaw, digging in through a small area that seemed to be less protected by the adamantium. "You fool!" Ultron's mechanical voice shrieks as Steve begins to drop through the sky. Steve knows that Tony won't be able to catch him in time, and he can only hope that the other man will not attempt a rescue while he still has a opportunity to strike. Steve's heart once again drops as he prepares to hit the ground, but it never comes.
Azure eyes open to see a makeshift net stretched between two buildings, keeping him from hitting the pavement. "You need to work on learning how to fly," Spiderman calls out above him before swinging away.
Steve makes a mental note to thank him later as he moves to a group of elderly women, one of them having lost her fanny pack and lucky visor. Steve helps the stubborn trio over to the protective barricades that have been set up. Hawkeye and Natasha having taken over ground control. "Nice hit," Hawkeye comments, standing back to back with Steve as the two battle on.
"It didn't work! Ultron's still functioning," Steve shouts, frustrated and disappointed in himself. Tony's suit of armor couldn't protect him from everything, and Steve knew that.
Steve stops suddenly, prompting Hawkeye to stop as well. "Uh, Earth to Captain, we're in the middle of a fight!" he shouts, firing off a series of arrows.
"Do you think if you got close enough, you could aim one of those things through Ultron's mouth?" he questions. Ultron's inside operating system was notorious for not being as durable as his outside.
"Of course, but I'm not going to have him tossing me around like a stuffed animal," Hawkeye announces, pointing towards the Hulk who appeared to be doing more damage then not.
Steve looks around, eyes settling on the thunderer flying high above them, taking people from the roof safely to the ground. "Thor!" he shouts.
The Asgardian drops down from the sky, mighty Mjölnir at his side. "You have called for me, and I have answered, what need do you have of me?" he questions, face pulled into a soft, almost confused expression.
"I need you to get Hawkeye as close as you can to Ultron, he's keeping this fight air born, and Iron Man can't hold him off forever."
"You wish to be taken to the sky?" Thor questions, attention turning to Hawkeye as the man readies a arrow. "Yeah, that's the plan."
Thor smiles. "Then I shall abide. Quick, hop onto my back!"
"Don't make this anymore awkward then it already is, big guy," he mumbles, doing as told.
"What is he doing?" Natasha shouts, swooping in beside Steve.
"He's gonna try and damage Ultron from the inside, which shouldn't be too hard, the thing likes to hear himself talk," Spiderman informs her, hanging upside down. The ground was clear, but there were S.H.I.E.L.D agents all over the place. Trying to get away unnoticed would be damn near impossible.
"Do you think that's really going to work?" she asks, guns by her side but not holstered.
"If I didn't know any better, I'd say you sound concerned," Spiderman mentions, and Natasha merely pierces him with a glare.
"I will kill you very, very slowly."
Spiderman immediately stops talking, which was a blessing in and of itself. Steve keeps his eyes trained on the archer moving quickly towards his target with Thor's help. The three watch as Iron Man keeps Ultron distracted as Thor closes in behind him, Hawkeye maneuvering himself onto Thor's shoulders. "It looks like they're playing a game of chicken, if the chicken was a million feet in the air, and no one else was playing," Spiderman mumbles to himself in a half-amused, half-frightened manner. Steve holds his breath as Ultron whips around, Hawkeye shooting just pass the destructive bot. Ultron begins to laugh, but throttles as Hawkeye immediately releases a second arrow straight into his mechanical mouth.
Hawkeye over corrects himself, nearly losing his balance, but Thor is able to keep him from falling. Tony takes the opportunity to put his fist through Ultron's mouth, shoving his hand down his throat, pulling wires and other interior workings out. Ultron defeated, Tony finally comes down from above. Steve notices that even in his armor, Tony appears sluggish. Steve panics, "Come on, we need to get you..."
"Cap, please, I'm fine," Tony says, holding a hand in the air as though that would stop Steve from coming any further.
"You're not fine," Steve argues, and he wishes Tony wouldn't lie so openly to him.
"Did Ultron say why he was attacking?" Spiderman questions, interrupting their blooming argument.
"Pym, he thinks Pym is with you, is he?"
"We haven't seen Pym in months," Natasha informs them all.
"Iron Man, let's go."
"You're both not going anywhere," Fury's voice booms as the man appears out of seemingly no where.
"You don't understand, he's..."
"Really tired of you idiots attempting to get me to join your little band of heroes," Tony cuts in, clutching Steve's wrist in one hand as he angles himself behind him. "Haven't I done enough for your cause?"
Steve gets the hint, putting on a stern face as he begins to speak. "I've expressed my gratitude for you finding me, but I don't work for you," Steve informs him.
:::
Fury goes to threaten them both, but doesn't get the chance as Tony takes off without any warning, Steve in tow. They don't get very far before Tony starts to lose control. "The jet is about two miles south from here," Tony says, and Steve can only hang on.
Steve removes his cowl, blonde hair sticking up in each and every direction, face red with exertion. Steve watches as Tony recharges his heart, looking worse for wear. The situation is as critical as it is troublesome. "This changes everything," Steve says, eyes connecting with Tony's for the first time in two hours.
"Just about," Tony remarks. "I'm guessing Pepper knew you were Captain America."
Steve nods curtly. "She said no one would ever find out as long as I promised to look after you. I'm assuming she knows you're Iron Man, then."
"Yep," Tony says, and he looks tired. The buttons of his shirt are open, arc reactor prominently displayed. Steve doesn't stare blatantly at it, though it's fascinating, he knew just how much the piece of machinery bothered the other man.
Steve feels his face flush, remembering how Iron Man had helped him out as he risked his safety to do simple and not so simple tasks for Tony, falling for the body of armor. Tony was a popular guy, but that didn't mean everyone wanted to shake his hand in gratitude—he had a lot of enemies. Steve also remembers being seduced as Captain America by Tony Stark, never once imaging that his two worlds would collide. This complicated things between them, he knew. Steve had enjoyed being protected by Iron Man, almost as much as he enjoyed guiding Tony as Captain America. Steve's embarrassment is immense as they sit in silence, all too aware of the tension between them.
"Does this mean that we were cheating on each other...with each other?" Tony questions, and Steve's face stiffens.
"I honestly don't know."
"Makes you wonder, huh?"
Steve fidgets, hands in his lap. "No." Yes.
:::
"You could have told me," Steve remarks, staring at the slender woman before him.
"Look, Steve, please don't take this personal, but I couldn't tell you. Tony is...strict about the information he releases, and if he had found out that you knew, let's just both say it wouldn't have been pleasant, for either one of us."
"But why black mail me if you knew Tony could take care of himself?" Steve questions, frowning as Pepper tosses her head back and lets out a laugh. That was new.
"Are you kidding me? Tony can't take care of himself. Iron Man might be able to help people, but Tony can't take care of Tony. Tony is the last person he thinks about, and that's why I black mailed you, Steve. I knew if anyone could make Tony see that he wasn't completely worthless, I knew it would have to be someone Tony admires—thinks greatly of. In case you haven't noticed, he has a fondness for you," she says, and Steve disagrees.
"No, not for me, for Captain America."
"You really believe that, Rogers?" Pepper questions, brow quirked. Steve doesn't answer.
:::
Tony's room is large, but nothing of personal interest lines his room other then the technological advances he has made. That has always been something that bothered Steve, it made him wonder why there was no touch of himself in all of his things. Steve is attempting to help Tony decide on a tux for the evenings charity event, one he had to force the other man to agree to. "S.H.I.E.L.D knows I'm here, that I work for you," Steve says, bringing up yesterdays events.
"Then let them know," Tony says, indecisive. "Black or this minx color?"
"They both look black."
"To unimaginative eyes maybe," Tony muses, picking one tux over another pleased, though they both look the same.
"I was thinking, on a serious note, about talking to Fury, seeing what..."
"No. Absolutely not, don't be ridiculous. The only thing Fury wants is for us to be his extra special puppets."
"They're not going to leave us alone, don't you get that?"
Tony stops buttoning his dress shirt midway up, obviously frustrated. "So, what? Do you just want to cave into their demands, Steve?"
Steve bites his lip to keep from lashing out. "All I'm saying, is that we worked well together. A group of heroes coming together for a common good."
Tony ignores him, finishing up his buttons and peering at himself in the mirror. "Why don't you come tonight? You never go, and you still have that one tux I got you."
"Why don't you ever stay on topic?"
"Why can't you just drop this?" Tony inquires. "I thought you didn't want to be a super hero anymore. I thought you wanted a normal life."
Steve glares heatedly at him. Anger pouring out in waves. "Nothing about working for you is normal," Steve says as he storms out of the room.
"Steve!"
"I'm not going!"
:::
Steve sits in his office, remembering. Steve had only been working for Stark Industries little over a month when he went to fetch Tony's dry cleaning, and ran into some trouble. Apparently, kidnapping him and holding him for ransom seemed like a brilliant idea, never mind the fact that Steve didn't think Tony cared enough about him to pay that ransom. The night was humid, streets still wet from a downpour that had lasted most of the day. Steve knew the three would be no match for him, but he never had to lift a finger.
Iron Man had appeared out of no where, disarming the men and apprehending them. Steve froze, he had never encountered Iron Man in his day to day life, and only a handful of times as Captain America. The image took his breath away, the armor was larger then life and appeared more flexible then Steve would have thought. He couldn't believe that Tony had built that, the mans genius knew no bounds. "Thanks," he had said, realizing it sounded odd to be on the opposite side of gratitude.
Iron Man paused. "No problem, just doing my job." Iron Man had ended up sticking around, making sure Steve didn't meet anymore trouble. It was odd, to say the least.
"Why not quit?" Iron Man had asked, staring at Steve as the man worked to get all of Tony's dry cleaning into the back of his vehicle.
"I knew working for Mister Stark had its risks," Steve had informed him, and Iron Man had merely remained silent. "Really."
"He can't be pleasant."
"Didn't he build your armor?"
"Yes, but that doesn't answer my question."
Steve frowns, thinking. "Tony has his own way of doing things, and sometimes those things don't make sense to anyone but him. He always seems so lost in his own head, but that doesn't make him unpleasant. Mister Stark has his own way of showing people he cares. Unfortunately, that tends to be with material things like a new suit or a really expensive watch."
"You don't like that he gives you this things?"
"No, but I think a 'thank you', or 'nice job' would be just as great, even better," Steve says, and he had wondered how odd they must have looked, standing in the middle of the street just talking. "Well, Iron Man, thanks again, but I've got to go," he had announced, holding out his hand.
"It was my pleasure," Iron Man had mentioned, grasping Steve's hand in both of his, pressure firm but not crushing. "If you ever need me, I'll be around."
"I'll keep that in mind."
Steve snaps out of his reverie, torn between doing what he believes to be right, and sticking by Tony's side. The solution he had wanted, had been hoping for, was for Tony to agree with him, at least in some part, and have them meet with Fury and the others. Steve understands where Tony is coming from, S.H.I.E.L.D had put almost as much emphasis on his responsibilities to his country, and its morale as they did to Tony and his suit of armor's potential use to win wars and save lives. Steve had been furious, out of his time, and grieving for those he had lost. Tony, no doubt, was suffering from a severe case of PTSD, shell shock as Steve had always known it, as well as other demons.
Demons he had yet to face.
Steve thinks about how he has a nice apartment in a decent part of the city. He thinks of the neighbors he has come to know, and share conversations with. Tony is a high maintenance, extremely intelligent, self-loathing, egotistical mad man, but he was Steve's high maintenance, extremely intelligent, self-loathing, egotistical mad man. Steve likes Pepper, he didn't like that she hadn't been honest with him...or that she had black mailed him in the first place, but people made mistakes, and she only did what she thought was the right thing. Steve likes the fact that he has options, something he didn't have in the military. When orders were given, he had to follow them. Working for Tony had allowed him to make mistakes, and learn lessons that being the perfect solider wouldn't allow.
Steve's internal battle is waging rampantly as he endeavors to finish his work. A list of important meetings, people to call, and blue prints to sort out. Steve's cellphone rings, and it takes him a moment to answer. "Yeah, Pepper, what do you need?" he asks.
"Is Tony at the office?" she questions.
"No, he should be at the charity event with you," Steve says, frowning.
"Well he's not, and Jarvis says he isn't at home."
"He does this all of the time," Steve reminds her.
"Yes, but he seemed off, more then usual. He got into it with Hammer, again."
"I'll look for him," Steve says, filing the last of his papers away before hanging up.
If Tony didn't want to be found, there was a good possibility that he wouldn't be. Steve decides to go home first, take his notes with him unless they were to be placed into the wrong hands. Steve knows that his apartment isn't too far from here, and so he decides to walk. Steve smiles at his doorman, the teenager with a mop of curls for hair and a long nose always asks why he never uses the elevator, and Steve always tells him that walking was better for his health, and his nerves. Turning down his hallway, Steve stops short of his door when he sees Tony leaning up against it, tie misconstrued and gaze vacant.
"Tony, what are you doing?" Steve questions as he finds his voice.
"You should have gone with me, Steve, you always make me behave," Tony mumbles.
"No, I don't."
"I behave better when you're around. You should see me when you're not there."
"You need to call Pepper, she's worried."
"When isn't she? She'd be better off without me in her life."
"She would never leave you, and you know it," Steve says, offering Tony a hand up.
"You would,"Tony says as he stands to his feet unsteadily, and that just wasn't fair.
"I never said I was leaving you, Tony. Is that why you're here? To have a excuse to act out and blame me? Is this where you push me away, Tony? Because I swear to you, it won't be as easy as you think, and I'm just as stubborn as you are persistent," Steve says, voice stern and unrelenting.
Tony stares at him wearily. The well known billionaire doesn't say a word as he leans forward, kissing Steve. "Tony," he begins.
"It's different, isn't it? I wondered how I could have possibly missed that those lips were yours, but the context was different."
"Tony, please..."
"When I was Iron Man, you needed me. Closing your eyes, never once daring to open them. I knew you could keep my secret."
"Don't. Come on, Tony, let's not talk about this tonight."
"The same goes for you, you know. I needed Captain America. I needed someone to tell me what to do, and I did it, and I loved every minute of it, but I'm not a super hero right now, and you're not a super hero right now," Tony says, and it takes everything Steve has to hold eye contact. "You're my boss. I'm your employee, that isn't even ground," Steve tries to explain, but Tony's thumb tracing the bottom portion of his lip has him distracted. The touch familiar, but completely different.
"I would think Pepper as your boss. I'm just the guy whose name just happens to be on everything."
Steve knows he's acting in a state of desperation as he unlocks the door to his apartment, allowing Tony in, and in more ways then one. Captain America would have more control over a situation like this, he would never allow it to get this far, but Steve is helpless and just so lonely. Tony works deftly to remove Steve's suit, hands only pausing to touch and memorize tantalizing flesh he has only briefly felt before. Steve has Tony's belt off, the other man practically ripping his expensive tux into pieces just to free himself of the material. With nothing else separating them, Steve's body begins to heat up.
They stand chest-to-chest, and Steve can feel the arc reactor driving into him. Tony's hands are everywhere all at once, finally coming to rest on Steve's hips as the blonde tangles one hand into Tony's hair, the other grasping the back of Tony's neck as he brings him in for a searing kiss. Steve can hardly breathe as he feels Tony's arousal pressing up against him, a serge of heat tugging at his insides as he directs them towards his bedroom. The back of Steve's knees hit the edge of his bed, and he stumbles back as Tony crawls over top of him, kissing his way up his midsection, mumbling how beautiful Steve is. Steve can feel himself flush at Tony's endless compliments, spreading his thighs apart as Tony reaches between them, causing Steve to gasp.
"Lube?" Tony inquires, and Steve almost doesn't remember what to say.
"Dresser, top drawer, to the left," Steve breathes, and he groans in disapproval at the loss of contact.
Tony Stark was going to fuck him, and Steve was going to let him. When Tony returns, his eyes are beyond dialated, breathing barely in check. Their mouths seal together, Tony's teeth nipping and biting at Steve's bottom lip. Steve can only moan out his appreciation, thrusting his hips forward as Tony refuses to touch him. "Spread em'," he says, and Steve realizes he means his legs. Steve obliges, head thrown back as he dares not to look.
Tony's fingers are teasing, circling around the sensitive flesh. Steve is about to snap, to demand that he get on with it, when a single digit enters him. Steve's surprise causes him to tense slightly, but soon he is relaxed once again, focused entirely on the man above him. "God," he breaths. "God, God, God," he nearly shouts as Tony adds a second then third finger, fucking him open as he places soft kisses to his bent knees, changing pace until he hits the spot that causes Steve to wail.
Tony smiles as though he's recovered some lost relic, twisting his wrist and driving into Steve in exactly the same spot, causing the other man to ramble under his breath. Steve's body is a absolute wreck, thighs trembling and chest rising and falling quickly. Tony pulls himself away from Steve, ripping open the condom he had acquired before putting it on. There is a brief moment where Tony stares at Steve with a unsure expression, wondering whether to stop, knowing that this would all end in disaster, and Steve can feel it, even agrees with him, but pulls him down for a bruising kiss, deep as Tony breaches his body. Tony licks his way into Steve's mouth as he rests entirely inside of him, Steve's legs wrapped around his waist as he pulls out slowly before pushing in with much more force.
"So beautiful. Oh, God Steve," Tony mumbles as Steve's back arches off of the bed.
Tony is undoubtedly rough in his actions, with only his words to soften them. Steve doesn't mind, not one bit as a thumb digs into his hip, and fingers snake their way across his throat. The teeth that bite down at his shoulder causes him to cry out, beg for more, and Tony delivers, every single time. Steve's hand clutches tightly at his sheets, the other is tangled in Tony's hair as the brunette fucks him senseless. Steve's not sure how much more of this he can take.
Tony pauses, ordering Steve to reposition one of his legs up onto his shoulder. "Yes, Mister Stark," Steve says, voice hoarse, and Tony absolutely stills, eyes shutting tightly closed as a full body shiver encases him from head to toe. Tony kisses the ankle upon his shoulder, the other sliding underneath Steve's ass to lift him higher, moving at a much slower, much more deliberate pace.
Steve bites his lip, a moan tearing its way from his throat as he pleads with Tony to kiss him, practically demands it of him. Tony complies, hand stroking the man beneath him roughly, once, twice, until Steve comes with a suppressed whimper. Steve's insides feel raw, body thoroughly used as Tony continues to fuck him into the mattress, hand still wrapped neatly around his throat. Steve continues to press his hips down as Tony pushes up, groaning as Tony's hips stutter, orgasm taking over him. Tony pulls out, standing to his feet unsteadily as he merely observes him, and Steve has never felt so exposed as he does in this moment. Steve sits up, only to be pressed into the mattress again.
Tony is on top of him, kissing him with a serge of energy that Steve happily reciprocates. Steve is confused; he isn't exactly sure what Tony wants. Steve switches their positions, pinning Tony easily beneath him. The look in his eyes are manic, and Steve lets out a anguished sigh as he dips his head low to swipe his tongue along the hollow of Tony's exposed throat. Steve traces over the arc reactor, causing Tony to attempt to remove his hand. "Stop," Steve commands, eyes peering seriously into his. Tony's eyes darken considerably, but he does as told.
Tony had just become comfortable with the other man being able to see the damn thing, but touching was a new obstacle he had yet to overcome. Steve's fingers dance over the cold piece of technology, a complete contrast to Tony's warm skin. Steve gazes into Tony's eyes, hands linked together as he bends down to place a kiss to the reactor. Tony inhales deeply, chest rising high as Steve continues his exploration. Tony's mouth falls open as Steve tongues the line between a technological advancement, and a man.
"I need to shower," Steve murmurs, and Tony nods.
"Would you like to join me?" he asks, and a small twinge of a smile plays at Tony's lips.
"Yeah?"
"Yeah."
:::
The next few weeks are considerably painful, cushioned only by the moments they spend together in bed. Steve is undoubtedly hurt as the two still quarrel over their positions in life. Steve believes the pain to be so deeply ingrained and tangled with the fact that he no doubt loves the other man, but Tony won't see reason. Correction: Tony will only see his reason, and feels attacked when Steve suggests something to the contrary. The tug-of-war is getting old, and Steve can sense it beginning to wear him down.
"You know, I never thought that this would get so complicated," Pepper states as the two share morning coffee at a bistro they often frequented when Tony got to be too much. "I never thought you were interested in men, and even if you were, Tony usually frightens more people off then he seduces."
"What exactly are you saying?" Steve questions, uncomfortable with his private life being discussed so nonchalantly in public.
"I thought that even if Tony wanted to use you, that he couldn't, but the more I think about it, the more I doubt he's using you. He likes you. Actually, that might be wrong—too. Tony is happy with the people he likes, he only gets this bad when it involves someone he loves."
"Tony doesn't love me, Pepper. He's just afraid I'm going to do something he won't like, and leave him. I'm a thing, a possession," Steve argues, and he wants to cry at how bad those words, his own words, tear him apart inside.
"Let me ask you something," Pepper says seriously, quietly as she places a hand over Steve's. "When you two do what it is that you do, does he ever let you top?"
Steve's already flushed cheeks deepen in color. "What does that matter?" he questions, finding this century to be more and more absurd.
"Tony would never submit to someone he just likes, Steve."
Steve, seven hours later, is still perturbed by Pepper's remark. Steve has not left his office since arriving, not even to use the bathroom. Cheryl has paged him twice to make sure that he is okay, and Steve can't remember his last reply exactly, but it was enough for her to remain silent for the last two hours or so. A knock sounds, and Steve is about to tell whoever it is to come back later when he hears, "Why in the hell am I knocking?" Tony opens the door a second later, looking at Steve with a dubious expression.
"Cheryl says you aren't taking any calls."
"I told her I have the Dawson agreement to go over," Steve says.
"Let me rephrase that, Cheryl says you're not taking any calls, including the ones from me," Tony says, arms quirked awkwardly by his side.
"Do you need something, Mister Stark?"
"Mister Stark," Tony repeats, sounding offended. "Mister Stark, really?"
"Tony, what do you need?"
Tony looks like he is ready to blow when they both hear Cheryl let out a scream and feel the building shift under them, knocking them each off balance and prompting them both to move. "Mortal, I have no dealings with you!" Loki shouts, and Cheryl clutches her hand over her chest as though it's failing her, and Steve fears that it might.
"Loki, what are you doing here?" Steve questions, pulling Cheryl up out of her seat and carrying her along to his office.
"I demand to know where my brother has gone to, I have words that need sharing with him."
Tony merely gawks, tossing his hands into the air. "Why would I know? Why does everyone think I know? Doesn't anyone know how to use a phone?"
"We don't know where Thor is, is what he means," Steve adds.
"Loki!"
"Oh, wait, there he is."
The Avengers emerge, led by Thor himself. "Brother, what is the meaning of this? Why have you gone about destroying this Midgardian city?"
"Because he's Loki?" Spiderman interrupts, a annoyed Wolverine behind him.
"It's a circus. My life is a circus," Tony mumbles, beside himself.
"It's not that bad," Steve tries, but his attempt is completely squashed as Fury rounds the corner.
"Stark, Rogers."
"Who let him in?" Tony yells. "I gave his picture to everyone and everything that could recognize his ugly face!"
"Systems are down. Magic, remember?" Hawkeye interrupts.
"I will not listen to strippers!" Tony says, and Steve feels like he's losing his mind.
Damn Loki. Wait.
"Where are they?" Steve calls out, voice urgent as both Thor and Loki are no where to be seen.
"Not exactly sure, but Thor said something along the lines of 'Why doth thou test me so...thy brother,' or something, and Loki was all like, 'The lady doth protest too much, methinks,' and then they both disappeared," Spiderman explains.
Fury rakes his hand down over his face. "Do you realize how embarrassing you all are to this organization?"
"Except us, right? Because we're not apart of your little organization," Tony says, distastefully.
"About that, Stark. I've been meaning to track you two down."
"Save it."
"Wait, Tony, let's just hear him out," Steve says.
"There's nothing to hear!"
And there it is, Steve thinks, it's their breaking point. Steve can see it, can feel it in they way Tony looks at him. "I don't. I don't agree, Tony," Steve says, and this is the moment he has been dreading. The fall through.
"Then go," Tony says, and it's a dare.
Steve stares seriously at him, his stomach churning. "I am."
:::
Steve doesn't linger as he follows Fury and the others out of the building. Steve had thought a lot about this, and all he could come back to were the people who needed someone to help them in their time of need. Steve had been selfish in taking Tony's help, help he didn't really need, but wanted. At any moment, Steve could have fended for himself, fought his own battles, but other people didn't have that chance all of the time. Steve, when it came down to is, chose to do the right thing.
"You're doing the right thing," Fury says, and he makes it sound so evil.
"Look, I don't want to work for you, Fury, but having a league of heroes has always sounded like a good plan."
"That so?"
"If you have more then one hero, you can save lives, lessen damage. I'm more in contact with this time thanks to the help of..., but there is a lot I still need to learn, but helping people is something I've always been good at, and can't ignore."
"Very well, then. S.H.I.E.L.D headquarters will be happy to have you."
"I don't think you heard me—"
"Do you really think Stark is going to let you walk right in? Do you think the two of you are still going to be the best of friends? You can go see for yourself, Cap, but don't hold your breath."
Steve did leave, mind unfocused as he thought about Tony's possible reaction; it couldn't possibly be like Fury had described it. Steve waited until the following morning to head back to Stark Industries. When he arrived to his office, he was surprised to see that his punch in code no longer worked. "Cheryl, do you know what this is?" he asks, and the woman looks over her thick frames with a confused expression.
"We're having a lot of technical difficulties, sweetie, let me buzz you in," she says, and Steve thanks her.
The appreciation is quickly morphed into horror, however, as Steve opens the door to find his things packed away into boxes. Steve suddenly feels like he can't breathe, and inhales deeply. The feeling is overwhelming. "You're trespassing," Tony says, and Steve doesn't even have the energy to reply.
Steve refuses to turn around, to look at him as he asks, "Why?"
"Why?" Tony questions, and suddenly his hands are on Steve's shoulders, turning him around to face him, to look at him. "Why is very simple, Steve. You work for S.H.I.E.L.D now, and S.H.I.E.L.D is not to be trusted around Stark Industries, or me," he bites.
"I work for you," Steve says, voice full of held back emotion.
"Not anymore."
"So all that I've done for you, all that I've done to prove to you that...and you don't trust me?"
Tony looks at him, face blank as he says, "No."
Steve nods his head then. "Fine."
"The only reason I didn't send you your stuff is because I know you have your costume here," Tony says as normal as if he were talking about the weather, "and even I can't override the code to that."
Steve moves to the vault sealed into the wall, punching in his code: 0217, the month and day he had first met him. Steve pulls out the case that holds the key to his transformation as a hero. Steve's hand freezes, afraid to take out the rest, but he does so anyway. He throws the photographs to the floor, each one containing a memory of the life he had set up for himself. The action makes him feel as though he is killing himself, one piece at a time.
When Steve is done, he can hear Tony talking once more. "I don't know how I'm going to fix that thing," he says, and Steve, without any warning or hesitation, puts his fist through the key pad.
"There, you won't have to worry about it," Steve says numbly. Tony doesn't say anything, and Steve is relieved.
"There is nothing in this world that would ever make me distrust you," Steve says, "and the fact that you can do all of this without a second thought makes me think Pepper was right."
"Is that so?" Tony questions, arms crossed and hip resting on the edge of Steve's old desk.
"Yes."
"And what's that?" he asks, face controlled as Steve balances his belongings in his arms.
"That there is no one you hate more then yourself."
The last thing Steve hears as he leaves is Cheryl calling out after him. "You poor, sweet, young man."
:::
Steve's quarters are small, cramped and impersonal. Steve, however, refuses to leave them for anything that isn't mandatory. Instead, he sits on his bunk, merely gazing into nothing. A moment doesn't pass where Steve doesn't think of Tony, and it makes him angry, and then it makes him so miserably sad. Steve had taken his frustrations out on the gym equipment, but none had withstood his strength.
Steve figures that if he sits still long enough, and doesn't try to think or to be that he will disappear. That never happens, though, and he suddenly has more disappointment to add to his ever growing list. Steve lays down, tries to sort out his thoughts, but only ends up remembering things he would rather forget.
"I'm not dead?" Tony had said, laughing as he looked around. A so-called business meeting had truly been a death trap meant for the billionaire.
"No, you're not dead."
"Should I be happy or sad about that?" Tony had questioned, suit wrinkled and hair disheveled as he sat on the floor, knees bent up towards his chest.
"You should be glad, a lot of people depend on you," Steve had said, doing his best to sound like Captain America, and not like some PA who had almost lost his boss and sometimes friend.
Tony had snorted at that, and it had made Steve frown in concern. "Do you wish you were dead?"
"Do you work for S.H.I.E.L.D, Cap?"
"I work of my own will."
"An independent, I see. I'll tell you what, Cap, I'll be glad I didn't die this evening because I've just met my childhood hero."
"Not the best answer, I suppose, but I'll take it. It at least means you're trying."
They had sat there, just talking. Steve had never seen Tony so open and honest about himself before. Usually, it was under the guise of Captain America that he got Tony to open up, but there were things he had learned that helped Steve, as himself, to get closer. Now that he thought about it, it all seemed so wrong. Tony had done the same, but it didn't make his actions commendable. If anything, it just made things that much worse.
Steve wondered if this feeling would ever go away.