One: When I first met you...
I remembered the question he'd asked me.
That snide partner of mine didn't know when to quit.
It brought it all back, the mermories, things I'd been trying to forget about for many years.
In reality, I suppose it was wrong to ignore your feelings and your memories, even after all those years of misery and unwanted pain.
"Oi, oi, Kakuzu, I wonder at times, y'know? If you could ever have shown any emotion other than your stupid, fucking greed! I bet you've never loved anyone in your stupid life, or have you?"
That's what Hidan, the stupid, Jashin-lover had asked me, it stung, those words that he'd said, but it was true, greed for money was all that kept me going in life, and the idiotic zealot would never understand that I, myself, had once felt love.
You could call it instinct, for he knew the moment that she had looked up at him, sitting in the tree opposite her, as he was, she has noticed he was watching her.
She stared at him curiously, wondering if her eyes were deceiving her, he stared back, frozen to the spot, wondering if she'd caught on that he'd been watching her come to this particular lake everyday?
He couldn't help but stare at her, after all, he hardly saw anyone other than the odd traveller and the animals.
Indeed, his life was very secluded, he did live in the neighbouring village; the village hidden in the Waterfall-otherwise known as Takigakure for most of his childhood and teens.
It was only when his parents had died and he'd gotten severe injuries from a mission prior to that, that he was rejected by many of the other villagers, not out of hate-oh no, it was out of fear and slight revulsion.
Because of his 'accident', he had to have many stitches all over his body, and that of course scared the younger children and repulsed the adults.
After that, he'd decided to leave and live outside the village, in the forest literally seven miles from the village itself, he wanted to be far away from people as possible, and remained that way for several years.
But now, that was all changing, for this woman, would travel these seven miles, to gather her own food and collect fresh water from the huge lake, literally on his doorstep.
She was the first human contact he'd had in years, despite that he hadn't talked to her, but he just couldn't help but feel intrigued by the way she moved, the colour of her fiery red hair and, well, she may not have had the most professional voice in the whole land with her singing, but he thought it was enchanting.
But now, he feared he was caught out, spying on her the way he had for many months now.
She slowly stood up from her crouched form, and titled her head to the side, as if trying to see if it would help her vision to catch a better glimpse at him.
It was a few moments later that she placed her hands on her hips, she called over to him.
"I know you're there! So come out where I can see you."
He shifted his weight on the branch, now regretting that he'd leaned forward to get a better look and make a a small branch snap and fall from the tree.
She'll probably just run away like all the others.
He thought sadly, he jumped down from the tree, landing on the ground gracefully, he'd wished he'd bothered to make a mask or something similar, for he still had his stitched face on display, he'd never had any human company once he'd decided to reside in the forest, which was the main reason for it.
She stared at him, her eyes a little wide, which once again he was expecting, he didn't move at all, though he waited for her reaction, and she still stood there even after a few minutes, making him wonder why she hadn't ran off when she had the chance.
"Oh dear, you must've had it bad." She muttered, her voice held sympathy and a hint of sadness to it.
Because there was no wind, he could hear her voice perfectly, and he was a little stunned by what she'd said, he was used to others shouting insults, throwing things and shunning him from everything, even though he'd gotten all those stitches, just because he'd saved someone elses life, instead of worrying about his own.
She sighed, then folding her arms across her, he had to admit, rather ample chest, she asked "Okay, now that I've seen you, care to explain why you were perhaps spying on me?"
The stern look on her face told him not to avoid the question and answer truthfully, he decided to test her limits, to see how far he'd go before she ran away from him.
With that set in his mind, he began to slowly move closer towards her, taking his time to get to her, she didn't flinch, even when he finally stopped at an arms length from her.
Being taller than her, he gazed down at her and thought that she must've been no older than twenty-three, it was only at this point he noticed her deep emerald eyes that had a dark-brown fleck around the pupils, this intrigued him all the more.
"Well?" She asked, still waiting for a reply.
Kakuzu shook his head violently, only realizing he'd been staring at her, he took in a deep breath and answered "I live nearby here, I didn't think I'd see anyone come out so far from the village to gather what you do, when you could easily buy some yourself."
A slow smile tugged at her lips, and she answered lightly "Ah, well, my family are rather poor...in fact we're so poor that we don't have the money to buy our food, we have a vegetable patch in our garden, but ever since father...passed on, me and my older brother have been trying to make ends meet, but enough about that, I didn't think anyone would be living way out here?"
He nodded slightly, then said "I'm sorry to hear you're having a difficult time, and I'm the only person living this far out from the village, I prefer the solitude, I'm not to keen on...busy places."
She hesitated then nodded, agreeing with him, for she didn't like busy places either.
She probably already gathered the real reason I'm way out here.
He couldn't help but let the thought pass through his mind briefly, she sighed lightly then picking u her basket, she stated "Well, I have to go and finish off around here, maybe I'll see you tomorrow?"
His eyes widened slightly, and he could alomst hear his heart pounding in his ears.
She wants to see me again?
He didn't think she'd bring anyone else along, and he wondered if she'd really come back the next day expecting to see him again, but he was more curious than ever about the woman.
She still smiled at him, and he was sure that she wasn't planning anything against him.
He attempted a small smile and nodding his head, he answered "Yes, that would be...nice."
She laughed lightly, a new sound to him, when was the last time he'd heard someone laugh?
Several years ago.
"Okay, by the way my name is Hayashii, what's yours?"
Hayashii; meaning forest, it definitely suits her, especially those wonderous eyes of hers.
"It's Kakuzu, I hope...you have a safe journey back..." He muttered, a little shy at first, but knew he'd get more confident with speaking to people if he could speak to her more often.
She smiled warmly at him over her shoulder, her eyes shining with what appeared to be humor, most likely from his shyness, she waved briefly then continued walking back through the way she'd come.
His right hand twitched slightly, then almost forcing himself, he waved a little at her retreating back, of course she couldn't see that, he was thankful, for he knew he'd probably muck that up and she'd laugh at him again.
He sighed to himself, feeling rather content once more, his nerves and a bit of excitement kicked in once he thought Hayashii, I'm seeing Hayashii tomorrow.
And see her again he did.
She came back the next day and looked around herself curious, she couldn't see Kakuzu anywhere.
Her first initial thought was that he was probably hiding again, if not then perhaps he simply did not want to see her again.
She was about to turn away, sighing heavily to herself, she heard a movement coming from a bush behind her, she looked round swiftly and saw him walking out, almost shyly.
She smiled at him, she walked over and greeted him "Hello, Kakuzu, I'm back again, so you're going to have to put up with me for a little while."
He smirked quietly, she saw it and stared at him mischieviously, but he shook his head, making his short, spikey brwon hair to fly about.
"I don't mind sharing your company."
She laughed and stated "Oh, Kakuzu, you don't need to be so shy and formal around me. We're friends now, right?"
He stared at her, slightly alarmed.
friends?!
That usually means commitment, trust and being nice.
She must've noticed his slightly alarmed expression, for her smile dropped, wearing a rather innocent look she asked "Is something wrong?"
He stared at her a little longer, loving those eyes of hers, before lowering his eyes and staring down at the ground, he answered "N-not really, I just haven't had any friends before, well, not anyone I could consider a close enough to be a friend."
She sighed a little, runing a hand through her shoulder-length hair she said "Well, you're already a friend to me, so I'll help you to one day think of me as a friend."
He was rather taken aback by the sudden statement, but saw a determined glint in her eyes, he nodded again, accepting her help.
But I don't think I need any help with that...
And help him she did.
Hayashii continued to pay visits to him everyday, despite the long journey there and back and also that he was less than the eager, talkative friend she was hoping for.
He tried hard, wanting to know more about her, wishing he could spend more time with her, but would never go back to the village he'd cut all ties off from.
It was only one day that she asked an unexpected question.
"Kakuzu, you are still a Ninja to the Waterfall village, am I right?"
He hesitated, of course he was a Ninja for that village, but not anymore, he'd decided to give that life up and prefferably live quietly until he died.
Well, that certainly did change.
He shook his head lightly, and answered quietly "Not anymore, I'm considered a 'missing' or 'rouge' Ninja now. I have no intention of going back to working under any Kage at all."
Hayashii stared at him a little longer, then nodded silently, shifting her weight on the rock they were sat on, she said "I'm not a Ninja, I have only been taught the 'replacement' jutsu and the 'transformation' jutsu, my aim isn't very good either, well, not over long distances, but I never did go any further than that, I suppose it's a waste, I mean, I can still learn now, but what's the use? There's no point in training now, I don't need too, I'm a woman, it's not expected for women to become Ninja."
He listened like he always did, allowing her to have her say, and that's what she liked about him, that he was a good listener and didn't judge her on her own opinion.
He stared at the grass blowing in the breeze and stated "It's your own happiness that matters, Hayashii, nothing else in this world matters so long as you're happy."
She blushed a little, knowing that what he said wasn't aimed just at her, but at others and possibly himself?
"And are you happy?" She asked him, thinking that it must be awfully lonely to be stuck up in the forest like he was, but he didn't seem to mind.
He smiled lightly, and answered "I suppose. I am much happier than I used to be back in the village. Here, no one judges me or hates me, I am just a normal man, like you are a normal woman."
Hayashii understood that others would see his stitches as...daunting and unusual, for she herself had never seen someone in so many stitches like he was, but she found his appearance rather intriguing more than frightening.
I wonder what jutsu he's good at? He certainly seems strong to me.
She let the thought skitter across her mind, perhaps someday when she knows him better, she could ask him to show her some techniques of his?
She hoped he'd show her, but knew it was best to wait, rather than rush him, making him feel uncomfortable and suspicious.
"You said you have an older brother, do you have any other relatives?" He asked absent-minded, but was still curious, he desperately wanted to get off the topic of why he left the village in the first place, though he was certain she already knew by now, for she certainly wasn't blind.
"No, my mother died when I was twelve, my father died a couple of years ago, so myself and my brother are the only ones living together, though his fiance will be moving in soon, he didn't want to leave me on my own, despite that I told him I was capable, there aren't any jobs going at the moment, so I do odd jobs like deliveries and making things for spare money, it's not much, but it does help." She answered, smiling sadly, she wondered if she'd gone a little too far with telling him other stuff that was completely irrelevant to the question, but she knew she could trust him, after all, she's known Kakuzu for a few weeks now, and who knew how long he'd been 'spying' on her before then?
"Are you happy with your brothers fiance moving in with you?" The question completely threw her off her train of thought, and she actually had to think of an answer, she'd never actually wondered if her brothers fiance moving in was any trouble.
She let out a low 'hmm' noise, then turning to him she answered "I like her well enough, she seems nice, I've only met her at least five times, most of them being brief, she's polite and friendly, as long as she makes my brother happy, I don't mind."
"Your brother loves her a lot then?" He asked probably one of the most stupid questions possible, though he felt there was a hidden meaning behind it.
She coughed lightly, then said "Well, they were betrothed ever since they kids, her father and my father worked together often on missions, so naturally they agreed on them both marrying. They seem happy enough, so I'm not worried."
He nodded, glancing at her, he saw her calm expression, though he couldn't surpress the nagging doubt he had replaying over and over in his head.
"D-do you have a betrothed? Or perhaps a man you love?"
He'd swallowed his pride-or whatever pride he had left, and strangely found his cheeks heating up at the ridiculous question.
She looked at him wih curious eyes, he wasn't looking back at her, though she felt a small blush heat up her cheeks, and what was more unusual was that she saw him blushing too.
"N-no, I don't, my mother and father were more taken to my brother than me, but decided that I could choose who I wished to marry, you could say my brother was their favourite-well, I suppose when you think about it, men always take pride in their sons, especially if they're first-born." Hayashii stated sadly, it was true, most of her life all the extra-attention went to her brother and making their small family become something better.
But never once did her brother ever rub it in her face that he was more cherished than her, which she respected him for.
"I see...must've been...slightly difficult?" He struggled with what to use as a comforting word, but came out with something probably worse than he'd expected.
She smiled warmly at him and answered "Not really, it was easy enough, all I had to do was learn a few skills as a Ninja for defense, cook, clean and so on, be the perfect wife a man would dream of having, and that's probably all that kept me going back then, but I still love my brother."
Kakuzu nodded silently, after all, he'd been an only child, only originally having the love of his parents, who were at the time, very nice people, but were hardly ever around, because of odd missions they'd done for other countries-such as being an escort to someone important to go across to another country.
Though the loss of his parents was a big shock at the time, he hardly felt any emoition over their deaths because he'd hardly spent much time with them.
"You are a very...nice person, I like that..." He admitted aloud, though looked away when he said it, after all, this was the first contact he'd had with a woman since before the accident.
He was very happy to have some female company again, someone understanding and...very beautiful, it took his mind off being lonely, but always reminded his scars.
I no longer feel shame for these...I saved many others, and by doing so, this is the proof I have, I suppose I am very lucky to still be alive.
Kakuzu rubbed some stitches, as he thought of how he'd gotten them, but he was instantly yanked out of his thoughts, when he felt a hand other than his own touch his cheek.
His head whizzed round at her now wide eyes, she blushed deeply and exclaimed "Oh, I'm so sorry, I-it was rude of me. P-please forgive me!"
She pulled her hand away, though she felt something else grip onto it, she looked round and down at their now joined hands, he just held her right hand for a few minutes, before he answered "It's okay, I...forgive you. You...but only you, may touch these. No one else...ever..."
She blushed deeply again, as he lifted her hand up to his cheek, she moved her fingers over his scarred face gently, not wishing to hurt him, though that was now impossible, for the pain had left ages ago.
Her hands are so soft and warm, they are loving hands...perhaps I need some love in my life? Someone to care for me, as I would for them?
Maybe...she's that woman?
He glanced at her, she was staring intently at their joined hands, still held to his cheek, her face was flushed slightly, nearly making him smirk, but he had to admit it...
He was falling in love.
To be continued in Part: 2 of 3