Disclaimer: I don't own any of Grey's Anatomy nor the lyrics by hinder down at the bottom even though they fit Mer/Der perfectly you guys should really check them out.
I don't really now why I make my life so complicated. Maybe it's something that started when I was growing up?
Maybe it was reassurance, that change wasn't happening. I hate change. Change is bad. It makes you see through the nonexistent and into the present, even when you fight your hardest to stay hidden. Change reveals you.
So that day, the day Derek chose her over me. Revealed me. The true me, pathetic, and sobbing Meredith Grey.
I'm sitting here and thinking back to the day when I was happy. I can't remember it. I can't remember when I last smiled because I felt him laying here next to me. Or when he looked at me in the hallways of Seattle Grace. It kills me that I can't remember the feeling of happiness.
I should hate him. He's the one that took it all away. Though I really want to hate him I cant. It hurts me to think of him, but that's all that is ever on my mind.
"Meredith?" Izzie's voice startles me out of my thinking. "It's time to go, you ready?"
"Yeah give me one minute okay?" I yell.
When we arrive at the hospital I hear people whispering. Saying something along the lines of poor girl, or serves her right.
Then I see him.
Across the hallway. He walks towards me but Alex steps infront of him. When did he become a nice guy? I wonder. Giving him a weak smile I walk into the locker room to change. Today was going to be a long, long, day.
I walk out of the locker room with orders from Bailey to go prep the guy in 589. I try my hardest to avoid him but luck wasn't with me.
"Meredith can we talk?" He asked me cornering me against the stairwell.
"No." I said. Who does he think he is anyway. Dumping me, and then wanting to talk to me like he hadn't just stomped on my heart five million times. My heart was broken. No amount of alcohol could save me now.
Honey why are you calling me so late
It's kinda hard to talk right now
Honey why are you crying is everything okay
I gotta whisper cause I can't be too loud
Well, my girls in the next room
Sometimes I wish she was you
I guess we never really moved on
It's really good to hear your voice saying my name
It sounds so sweet
Coming from the lips of an angel
Hearing those words it makes me weak
And I never wanna say goodbye
But girl you make it hard to be faithful
With the lips of an angel
It's funny that you're calling me tonight
And yes I've dreamt of you too
And does he know you're talking to me
Will it start a fight
No I don't think she has a clue