I smell the air and know it is a good day for a hunt. The forest is alive with birdsong which drowns out my quiet footsteps. A distance away from my position a young buck chews happily at the green and yellow grass. I don't raise my bow, as it's good to let the young ones be in peace some days. Plus my bones have gotten so old it's getting harder to run after the deer after I let my arrows fly. It can take more time to track an injured beast these days and today time is not on my side. I'm already late which will get me in trouble with Peeta for sure. Time to empty my traps and jog home, can't be late for the anniversary.

The house sits in the meadow and behind it the old fences I snuck under have been left to rust and creek in the wind. Coming home it's nice to remind myself there hasn't been a curfew since the war ended. These relics are just old reminders of the past, just like me. Pages of a history book somehow still clinging on. The meadow house is still holding strong, the front door could do with fresh paint. Inside there's busy footsteps running around. I take a deep breath and look to primroses flowers. Then I open the door to a domestic war zone.

Peeta's running around like a headless mother hen worrying about her young. Our young are in their early thirties but Peeta's still sees the messy toddlers. Not hard to do, they bicker like children when they remember to visit us.

He sees me and kisses my hand but I can see the stress in the wrinkles on his forehead. Our daughter walks in from behind me and he lets out a sigh.

"Rue" says Peeta "Green lipstick isn't what a representative staff member should wear especially not this week."

"Dad for the last time, all the representatives and their staff members wear it for work Stop worrying."

"Please just not today." he winces.

I wave my hunting prizes, a couple of rabbits.

"I'm not ready, got lot of skinning to do. Maybe I should sta-"

Peeta shakes his head "I've already got your outfit and a bath ready on the train. If you must skin them, you can skin them on the way if you like."

Damn he knows my traps well, should have gone for the 'my leg is in a bear trap.' idea.

Peeta diverts his attention as our youngest who stomps into the hallway from the kitchen. "Henree, just why. We're leaving in 5." Our son is in his overalls and foot to toe covered in coal dust.

"We had a big quota to fill in the mines. Can't leave my boys down there alone."

"Bit today of all days." says Peeta.

Henree grabs his sister lipstick on the table side and smears it on his lips. "Think I'm ready for the capitol now."

"Henree!" screeches Rue "You oaf you know how hard it is to buy this here."

Our two children start to fight over the lipstick like a toy and Peeta sits on the stairs defeated.

I can see Peeta is about to break down. It's his own fault working himself up like this but I can't stand by and watch. Sitting next to him I just hold his hand like he always does for me on a bad day and say something I hope is soothing.

"He can take my bath on the train and borrow one of your spare suits as I know you packed an extra just in case."

"Thank you." Peeta whispers "I'm going to need you more than ever."

"We could just stay here" I suggest "Just stand for the camera and look old like we always do."

He places an arm around me "We are the last tributes left, if we can't make the 45th anniversary of the war then who's left to honor them and the peace they helped build."

He moves his hand through my hair which has turned lot more grey since we last traveled to the capitol. His has gone from blonde to a glowing white looking as strong and dashing as ever.

"If Mags can volunteer at an older age than us, I guess we can make a good show for her. For everyone else who's gone."

We kiss for confidence, lets gets this over with.

The trains had not changed much, I took a few gulps from the mini bar to dull my senses but the smell of alcohol only brought back memories of Haymitch. Of my first journey out of the district. I rush to the bathroom to make those quick gulps become quick hurls into the bottom of the toilet. I can feel my clothes sticking to my back from the sweat. The room is getting smaller. The air is failing to fill my lungs. Next to the window I spy some salvation. A selection of small room controls. Some frantic button pressing and cool air bursts in filling the bathroom with cool scented air. The glass of the train was tinted black, yet now it was starting to fade away clear. Taking in the landscape in can see where the old borders of what was District 12 used to be. The train isn't going fast and in a short roll I can see an oddity. Workmen constructing something large and a crowd with suitcases standing before armed guards. I put my face up to the glass when I hear Rue shouting through the door.

"Mom! Mom! Come out quick it's important!"

Sweat pouring from my forehead I grasp the door handle and slide it aside.

"What?!" I gasp.

Rue shoved a folio in front of my face "What colour roses should we have for my wedding?"

"What?" I gasped again deflating as I stood. The images of guards in my head now bursting into flowers. The windows behind me turn dark again.

"I like the yellow yet if he's running for PresidentWeCan'tHaveColoursOfTheOppositionParty. What do you think" Rue rattles like rapid fire and my head feels like it's spinning. I roll my eyes "Ask your father. He's the artist"

"He's busy sewing his spare trousers as Henrees fat ass ripped them."

I grip the side of the train as it rocks suddenly. Rue reached out and grapples my shoulder.

"Mom are you alright are you having a code red?"

I push her aside, it is hard to look at her face at these moments. Apart from her eyes sometimes it is like looking into a mirror to the past.

"I'm fine, just travel sick."

"I know a code red when I see one mother." She pulls my arm over her shoulder and drags me into the sleeping quarters.

"Now lie down" she orders but I didn't need to be told. Exhaustion rattles me from head to toe like a drug. Rue rummages into the cupboards before finding a small face mask. She cracks it in five places and puts it over my face. It blinds me from the room as I can feel the mask flood with warmth. The muscles in my face relax like melting ice. I didn't realize I was clenching my teeth so hard. Code red it is.

Now the next part of the ritual begins. Rue starts to sing an old poem she wrote for me when she was a little girl. Thanks to Snow instead of me singing her to sleep, my daughter learnt to sing her mother to sleep. To help me fight the monsters who brought me the nightmares. Who knew his foul breath would infect her childhood too. Time to stop my thoughts and focus on her voice.

"Mommy don't you cry, There are flowers in the garden. The roses are red, The tulips are blue, The primroses are yellow. Please let them sing to you. They sing a song of calm, they sing the song of peace, They sing for you sleep, To sooth your heartbeat. Mommy go sleep, Mommy don't you cry..."

I feel myself sink into a dream, my heart steadies with every childlike verse and my head tingles like glitter before I go dark.

Reaching out across the bed I realize I'm on the train and not in our old home from my dreams. Not sure how long I've been asleep. The windows are tinted in here too and there isn't a clock to be seen. Shuffling my feet to the floor I stare at the old woman looking back at me from the mirror. I'm glad to see her stern hard face, with my lucky wrinkles and grey hair. A curse for some but not bad for a former tribute to wake up and see after a code red. Below the mirror there's a neat pile of cards with the unmistakable handwriting of my husband. His writing is just as beautiful as his paintings. It's his speech for the anniversary, because of course he's going to take the burden of a public appearance this year. I glance the lines and gasp.

...Our children are raised to hate the old capitol for what it was, yet this hate is not an old flame, it still burns us today. With all of my scars and with what was done to me. I can say today I forgive the old capitol for what they did. I hold no more hate for them. Why? Because we make peace with the past so our children can have their bright future. ...

Only Peeta could do this. He's planning to forgive the war crimes this year. He's going to forgive Snow for torturing and warping his mind. Quite a move, not sure I could do the same with a straight face. Not sure anyone would believe me if I try. These anniversaries are so bitter, maybe it's more powerful to talk of peace and to move on. Maybe it's the only way we can know we are in a peacetime. I have to talk to Peeta about this.

Outside the room I could hear the sharps whispers from the trains lounge. The door is only a thin velvet red curtain and beyond it I can hear Rue and Peeta in a heated discussion.

"She's going to find out. I'm lucky I got to her in time."

"Rue, last thing she'll want to do is talk to anyone in the new capital. Trust me. We'll be in for the memorial and back in no time."

"But what if she overhears something. She'll be so mad,"

"Mad about what?" I ask.

They turn and Rue's eyes go wide with horror. Peeta just smiles with his well trained propaganda face.

"Oh nothing dear just talking about the wedding. Are you feeling better? Rue was worried about you"

I continue to stare, maybe I should upgrade to the crossed arms. No. I have a better idea.

I start count "Three."

"Rue's worried about how long Franklin's been in the new capitol."

"Two." Rue's eyes grow wider.

Peeta smiles. "Get some sleep I can take care of this."

"One."

Henree rolls his eyes "Mom, they don't want to tell you the capital government have reintroduced the district borders."

Rue turns pale and Peeta winces at our son. Henree just shrugs it off "What? She should know."

Rue tries to reassure "Its okay the borders are still open it's just more limited. When the party wins the election we're going to reverse all of this."

I turn to Peeta "Was this your idea?" There's a fire in my belly, burning warmth in me like the face mask.

"I didn't want you to worry about-"

"Worry! What if this destroys the peace. What if it all goes back to what it was like. We can't let them take away childhoods again. We promised each other. You promised we would fight this together if it came-"

Peeta rushes forwards holding my hand where I had started to crumble his speech. "I know, I know what we promised. I'm sorry. Forgive me for this please."

I nod and look into those blue eyes. "Just tell me everything."

"It's not as bad as you think, but it is worrying turn." he says.

Rue speaks next "There's been rolling power cuts to the capitol and the areas nears it-"

"Which is bullcrap" spouts Henree.

"Henree" Rue rolls her eyes "This is no time for conspiracies."

Henree stands up, he looks just like my father did. Chest puffed out and strong steam eyes glaring out. "But it's not right there are power cuts." he says "Since the first power cuts we've been working hard and mined more than double this year's supply. If they're not holding back someone's screwing up somewhere. I manage that mine and I can tell you they needed to make three trips to take out what my men mined, when they only make one. If you're the smart one you can do the math on that. It makes no sense why we're being told there's not enough work being done."

Rue looked at me "That's why they brought back the districts Mom. They're saying too many workers from hard labour areas are moving off to central areas which are now overpopulated and losing power. I don't think the borders are the right way to do it. We could do other things to encourage people to stay an-."

"-You don't have to!" says Henree "We've got enough men down there, I told you. We're doing fine. That's the lie you need to fight! Not following their lies and shaming your own folk. That's how they'll win the election."

Peeta sighs at me as our kids hiss like cats at each other. "You want to help fight this don't you?"

"Why would you try to stop me?"

"It's been long time since you last had a really bad nightmare and today you had a code red. I don't want you to get new nightmares." he says looking at the floor.

"What did you tell me earlier? We are the last tributes left, if we can't make it then who's left to honor them and the peace they helped build."

He's smiling, I got him good using a twist of his own words. Better words than I can come up with. But I wasn't done with him yet. Opening my hand I gave him his speech.

"It's very powerful what you plan to say. Don't you stress, I'm going to be there next to you. Let's show the new Panem how it's done."

Authors notes:

If you're wondering why Rue and not Prim, planning to reveal this later. Henree was made up name but feel it should be Peetas fathers name (been while since I read it but cannot find what his name was.) I'm enjoying my little run at this and hope to add more updates as I hope this will help me practice my writing.

Up next, They're Back at the Capitol and Katniss wishes she keeps her big mouth shut.