"Ryou!"
"..."
"C'mon, Ryou, I know you're there."
"..."
"Woman! Pick up!"
"..."
"I'll just call back, you know. Again and again and again and again-"
"...!"
"Ha! What the fuck took you so long?"
"..."
"...You are such a loser. It's only midnight! But... uh, look - I kind of need you to pick me up."
"...!"
"Hey, don't be like that! Malik's here too - and he's scared of heights, you know."
"Hey, shut up!"
"You shut up!"
"...?"
"Er - at Kaiba's."
"...?"
"Well... in a tree at Kaiba's, if you want to get technical..."
"...!"
"...He hung up. Alright, alright-"
"..."
"Okay, you hear this? You know what that is?"
"...?"
"...No, I'm not doing anything to them! Ra - they're about to tear me to pieces! Bastard set his rottweilers on us."
"..."
"He hung up again! Useless little girl-"
"..."
"Oh, come on - you know you're not going to be able to sleep anyway."
"..."
"No, you're really not, and you wanna know why? ...Because you won't know what we did!"
"...?"
"Heh, I thought so. Okay, so there was this bar - Anarchy? - yeah... Um, we kind of ran out of money. Sorry 'bout that."
"...?"
"Um, because it was out of your wallet..."
"...! ...! ...-"
"Geez, I get the point! Anyway, and then they kicked us out-"
"...?"
"No, because we flooded the building."
"...?"
"No, that's exactly what I mean - though I suppose they were probably more concerned with the way it sort of crumbled, near the end-"
"...?"
"Well... it was all because we were out of money. Malik was pissed, and he flushed the wallet..."
"I did not! You-"
"...!"
"Er, yeah, and anyway, then we went to Kaiba's, because the cabby knew where it was-"
"...?"
"What? You're supposed to give them money? Maybe it was the snake-"
"...!"
"Forget about it, it'd take too long. Anyway, can you come get us now?"
"...?"
"Aw, come on, it's Kaiba, you know what a touchy bastard he is-"
"...!"
"Well... Malik had these firecrackers... and stink bombs... and a few cherry bombs... muttermutter mail slot... the snake, too..."
"...!"
"Yeah, I thought it was a good touch. ...Shit, he hung up!"
"...Idiot."
"I'm gonna push you if you don't shut up - come on, Ryou, I know you're sitting right there-"
"..."
"Why? You're going to have to come get us eventually."
"...!"
"And you're obviously so PMS-y that you'll be tossing and turning for hours anyway-"
"Let me guess - he hung up."
"Huh. You're spooky when you're drunk, how'd you do that? Ah, Ryou, guess what-"
"...! ...! ..."
"-I love you."
"..."
(Bakura snapped the phone shut with a satisfied smirk.) "He's on his way."
Owari