LIKE THIS: CHAPTER 1

Author's Note - Welcome:

Hey guys! So, this "story" is more going to be a series of non-consecutive oneshots of missing scenes or thoughts from various episodes of Suits. Entirely Darvey slanted. I'm writing it like this mainly because I don't want to be constricted by something silly like the linear nature of time … Just the same, I hope you enjoy!

Author's Note:

This oneshot takes place during S01E07 Play The Man, in which Mike embarrasses everyone by losing his mock trial, and Scottie casually informs Harvey that she was engaged, like, the whole time.

S01E07 Play The Man

He watched Mike leave and sighed internally. Honestly, this kid was going to stuff the mock trial up so spectacularly at this rate that Harvey thought even he might feel embarrassed. Completely unprepared, no client, no witness …

"Jesus," Harvey muttered to himself, getting irritably to his feet. Sometimes he thought having an associate was more trouble than it was worth, and now he was going to have to try and help. Like he had time for this sort of thing.

Donna was typing up a memo as Harvey sauntered up to her from his office.

"Hey," he muttered, leaning towards her on his forearms.

"Hm?" she said vaguely, not looking up.

"You playing a witness for anyone yet?"

She froze, and then turned to frown at him.

"No," she said firmly, in a tone that told him quite clearly that she wasn't answering his question, but refusing his request.

"Come on, Donna. You heard him; he's completely unprepared," he hissed, glancing furtively around. He didn't need the world knowing he was trying to help Mike.

"Not my problem," Donna was retorting. "I play for winners."

This was a fair enough point, one he of all people couldn't exactly argue. So, he took a tack he knew would work.

"Well, he's my associate, and how he does reflects on me and by extension on you, so…"

There was a brief battle of wills as they glared at each other.

"Ugh, fine," she snapped in exasperation after a few seconds, rolling her eyes.

He smiled at her, but her attention was back on her monitor.

"Thanks. I owe you one," he said instead.

"He'd better not lose, or you're gonna owe me a whole lot more," she said haughtily.

"He won't lose now that he has you," Harvey said with a smirk. Donna deeply appreciated flattery, regardless of who was delivering it or, frankly, its sincerity.

She turned back to him, matching his smirk.

"Shoes," she said sweetly.

It was Harvey's turn to roll his eyes.

"Fine," he grunted. "This weekend. But that's win or lose, no added benefits if he screws up."

"Deal."

She was lost in her memo again, a self-satisfied quirk to her lips, so Harvey made sure to let loose a token sigh of resignation. It was pointless, really. He always enjoyed shopping with her - as unlikely as that may have seemed - and they both knew it.

Shopping with Donna was an experience all its own, with him as her audience for once as she swept through the store with the swift expertise of a collector, declaring her final choice with a glowingly regal air. She never took too long, never dithered over her decisions and never asked for his opinion. She merely selected the item as though she were doing it the favour of granting it the luxury of being possessed by her. An accurate outlook, as far as Harvey was concerned, because Donna made everything look better for adorning her.

The customary breakfast that accompanied these outings was always a lot more leisurely, Donna picking from a handful of her favourite places, where they would sip sultry coffee over exquisite meals of her decree, while making fun of the people passing the windows and catching up on office gossip. Then she would order something decadently sweet "to split", but he would merely take his dutiful single bite and she would savour the rest.

The expenses that came with these mornings were more than worth the hazy warmth of a meal with a close friend with whom he could drop all barriers, a thoroughly unique experience in Harvey's world. Occasionally, if it had been too long since the last morning, he would find a reason to owe her a shopping expedition just for the excuse for her company. He did that sometimes in the evenings, too, when he would erroneously inform her that he absolutely needed to get a jump on a case that required her help, just for the hours of easy conversation in the dark deserted office, the lights of the city a friendly backdrop to their bickering over what take out to get.

In theory, they could simply spend time together without pretences, but they walked a careful line between what they were and what they could be, and nobody understood better than Harvey the dangers of even brushing up against that line. Like a careful chemical balance, they had to be sure that no single drop of temptation disturb their equilibrium, because it would take very little for it to go bubbling out of control. So they played their roles and partook in their rituals, with a stable façade of formality and yet not a moment of second guessing what they truly were to each other.

x x x

"Okay, what's wrong?"

He started out of his thoughts and turned his attention back to Donna. She had finished the last of her almond custard crème croissant of decadence, or whatever the hell it was called, and was staring critically at him.

"Nothing," he said automatically, a pointless delay in the end. She cocked her head in that knowing way she had, and he knew that the time had come. In truth, he had been wanting to tell her about everything that had happened with Scotty and had planned to bring it up this morning. But the morning, her company, it had all been too pleasant and he hadn't wanted to spoil the outing by releasing the cold darkness sitting in his chest.

"Fine," he said. "I was going to wait for another time, but I guess it's on my mind."

"It's to do with Scotty, isn't it?"

He nodded gloomily.

"She's getting married," he began, but then realised he was unable to vocalise the rest. He half opened his mouth, then let out a puff of air and shook his head in exasperation at himself.

"Wait, what?"

He focussed his attention onto her and was relieved to see that she looked as horrified as he felt. Immediately, he felt better, a sort of release.

"She told me last night."

"But, you …" she paused there, allowing the implication to present itself, then closed her eyes and let out her own breath. "God, I'm sorry, Harvey."

"Yeah," he muttered. After an extended moment where they simply looked at each other, he finally voiced the things he knew Donna already knew. "I just can't believe she didn't say anything. That she let me … I mean, what does that make me?"

"Nothing, Harvey. You did nothing wrong."

"Bet he'd disagree."

"You didn't know."

"I should have known."

"How?"

The conversation had progressed into a kind of feverish exchange, as though they were following some pre-ordained script at top speed, leaning towards each other, elbows on the table, eyes locked and the rest of the world gone.

"I should have figured it out."

"Because you can read minds?"

"You would have known."

"Maybe not."

"Please."

"She should have told you."

"Yeah, I know, but-"

"But nothing. It's on her, not you."

"I don't want to be this guy."

"You're not this guy."

"I'm complicit."

"No, you're not, and you know it."

"Maybe. It still feels shit."

The locomotive exchange fizzled down to a standstill.

"I'm sure it does," she said gently, and he felt another gnawing sensation in his stomach. He leaned back again as though dodging away from a burn and watched her closely.

"It's not about … her getting married," he said carefully.

She said nothing and he frowned at her.

"Donna-"

"Look," she interrupted. "I get why you're upset. She betrayed you, made you do something that goes against everything you are. But let me ask you this … did you confront her about it?"

He swallowed back his retort and simply stared at her.

"No. Because you weren't just angry. You were sad, too."

There was a longer silence now as he contemplated her point and then tried to scramble together a response. All that came out was a clumsy, "I'm not in love with Scotty."

Donna gave a smooth shrug and a kind smile.

"I'm not saying you are. I'm just saying that what you are to each other means something to you, and now you're losing part of that relationship. That's sad, and that's okay."

He wanted to dismiss this train of thought completely, but somehow the magic of the morning allowed him to accept it instead. A little.

"Anyway," said Donna at last. "I think we need to talk about how long before we can hold our heads up high again at the office, after your wonderful associate humiliated us so effectively."

Warm with gratitude at her timely subject change, Harvey gave a theatrical eye roll.

"Oh, shut up. You got your shoes.".

x x x

AN: Thanks for reading! I'd love to hear what you thought :-)