Disclaimer: I own nothing... unless you count a couple of boxsets. Do they count?

These are pretty much my thoughts on what happened in Borderland cunningly disguised as a fanfic. :P Quite possibly the result of too much thinking about fictional characters and listening to some depressing songs. And I can also see this happening after where the episode left off (even if it is slightly OOC). I think the next few episodes are going to be quite interesting. Hope you enjoy and please leave a review - even if you just want to express what you thoughts on Borderland and what you think will happen in the finale. :)

Additional: This does contain spoilers for Borderland. If you have not seen and do not wish to be spoiled - please do not read on.

Comfort in the Calm Before the Storm

"Tell me how much I've been like a daughter to you and how much you love you."

"Will that help?"

"No... What I really need to know Gibbs, is if you're going to love me no matter what?"

But all he does is stare at her and she is unable to read the multitude of emotions flickering in his steely blue eyes. She doesn't know how long they remain like that, eyes locked and she just wishes he would answer. But he doesn't and he won't. Because deep down they both know that this cannot be solved with a simple "I love you" and a kiss on the cheek.

He is the one to blink first and turn away, unable to look at her any longer because of whom she reminds him of and what she means to him. Abby opens her mouth as if to comment, to question, to demand, but then swiftly she closes it. With a small sob she turns away, ignoring the tears which are tracking down her face leaving trails of wetness, and leaves the smell of sawdust behind her.

After what seems like only a second later, Gibbs looks up again and finds the basement empty. Abby is long gone. Softly he puts his tools down and slithers to the floor, burying his face in his hands.

"I'm so sorry," he whispers to the empty, lonely room.

Abby sits in her car and silently cries.

She doesn't want to believe any of it and yet she finds herself knowing that it is true. Her forensics doesn't lie and Gibbs' tone hadn't either. But now, none of that mattered. It was in the past and now she was faced with the biggest decision of her life. Torn between Gibbs staying and Gibbs being locked away. It was her choice, make the right choice by science and the forensics she loved so much or make the right choice by Gibbs. Either way, the decision she would make would tear her up, change her life forever and she didn't know if she would ever recover from it.

Not for the first time she found herself wishing she had never gone to Mexico and never found out. Some skeletons were best left in the cupboard. And yet, she now finds herself wondering how Gibbs had gone about with this weight on his shoulders. For so long he had made it his life's ambition to put away dirt-bags. To put away killers and now he was the killer.

No. That couldn't be right. Gibbs wasn't a dirt-bag. Or was he?

Abby no long knew and as that thought hit her, she began to cry even harder.

She's lost all sense of time, but what seems like an hour later she is outside his door. In reality it is 2:00 AM, but she knocks anyway, knowing he will answer. He always does.

Her tears have long since dried up allowing her to drive safely, but her make-up is still strewn down her face. She doesn't even know what her hair must be looking like. But Abby doesn't care and knows that he won't either. All she needs right now is comfort, a shoulder to cry on and an unquestioning reassurance that everything will be alright.

She knocks a second time before the door is opened, revealing the one person who will always be there for her, no matter what the time or the situation. The single person who she can trust right now.

"Abby? Hey, what..." he trailed off, obviously noticing her condition and distraught demeanour.

"Timmy?" Abby chokes out and a second later she is wrapped in his warm embrace, her face buried into his shoulder.

Without question, he leads her inside, flicking on a nearby lamp before sitting down with her on the sofa. Instead of asking what's wrong or demanding to know what's happened, instead he simple asks if she needs anything.

She shakes her head against him, before snuggling into his welcoming and familiar embrace, content with his presence and relieved he's not asking questions. Gibbs had once been able to make her feel this safe and loved, but that time now seemed like such a long time ago. Just thinking of her surrogate father and the situation she was in, brought another sob to the surface and McGee automatically began stroking her arm in comfort.

McGee had questions. A million of them at least and yet not once did he ask. Abby would talk when and if she was ready. Until then he was happy to comfort her in any way possible; it upset him so much to see her like this. And it brought back painful memories of the last time she needed comfort. He prayed to God this wasn't one of those situations and pushed back the thought that, somehow, this was much worse.

Again an age passed. Or was it a minute? Abby could no longer tell. Maybe she had slept a while; maybe this was all a dream and when she opened her eyes the...

No.

Her eyes opened and the clock in McGee's apartment read 2:57 AM. His steady breathing and the slow rise and fall of his chest told her, he was asleep. With a slight, sad smile she carefully began to extract herself from his embrace.

"Abby?" McGee's eyes snapped open as he instantaneously tightened his grip.

"Sorry," she mutters before shifting her position to sitting, her head resting on his shoulder as he relaxes once again.

"No, it's ok Abs," he tells her, reassurance thick in his voice. She nods against him again and for another few moments they remain that way.

"Did you want me to fix you anything?" His soft voice breaks through the silence. "I was going to make myself some hot chocolate," he gave a weak smile, which Abby returned before nodding the affirmative.

"I'll be back in a sec," McGee says, heading towards the kitchen. There was silence again followed by the sound of crockery being softly placed on the bench before he spoke again. "I'm not going to ask what's the matter or what's going on," the voice echoing back to her on the couch.

"I know, Timmy," she murmurs back, unsure if he can actually hear her.

"But, whatever it is or whatever's happened to make you so..." he trailed off and Abby could tell he was controlling his emotions. She knew he didn't like seeing her this upset and not knowing the cause. "... but no matter what, I'll always be here for you, Abby. And whatever happens in the future I will be with you one hundred percent and always there to back you up. Whatever choices you make, I know they will be the right ones and I will be beside you every step of the way. I promise you that."

And Abby didn't reply. She couldn't.

It was as if he knew and understood. And yet she knew he couldn't; she'd hidden it all from everyone. At that moment she felt as though she wanted to reveal it all to him, but something stopped her. No, she couldn't tell Tim. Not now at least. It would all come to light when it was time and maybe then, they'd come up with something. Tony and Ziva and Ducky, even Jimmy would surely work together towards a common solution that suited all. Abby instantly thought of a coverup. Would it really come to that...?

But now was not the time for planning or telling anyone. As much as she wanted this burden off her chest, it was hers to carry. She didn't want to be the one to ruin the respect McGee had for Gibbs. He'd be heartbroken, shattered... in many ways like she was now. She didn't want to put him through that too.

She'd put him through enough already and yet here he was, comforting her in the calm before the storm. Promising so many things that made her heart break in the overwhelming amount of gratitude and love she felt for him right now. Of course McGee would be there for her, he loved her. It was that pure and simple and she knew it, she shared the feeling. Abby just hoped that would be strong enough for when he finally knew what was at stake and the decision she had to make. The thought of the choices ahead brought from her a weary and sad sigh and she wished none of this was happening. Then McGee was there again.

After placing the steaming cups on the coffee table he settled back down onto the sofa, pulling her towards him. Swiftly he pressed a kiss against her forehead. "Don't you dare think otherwise, ok? One hundred percent, Abby Sciuto, I'll always be here for you, no matter what."

She gave him a weak smile, "I know, Timmy. I know..."

"...I just wish Gibbs was too."