What If

Summary: Edward left in New Moon on Bella's 18th birthday. Charlie persuades her to go look for a college, she does but she didn't think such an innocent event would make her heart ache so much. When she visits Cornell, she sees whom? No other than Carlisle, the father to her lover. He brings her to Edward, will all be better or will Bella and Edward go through more pain?

B POV-

"No dad! I don't want to go to college! I am dead! I can't move in life!" I yelled. Charlie was trying to make me go to college! Couldn't he see that I was nothing without Edw-Him? He would pay for my tuition for nothing! I wasn't going to learn if Edward was everywhere!

"Bells, yes you are. I am not allowing you to go all depressed and suicidal! It was one breakup! Maybe if you go out of state, to forget about Ed-Him." He said. No, I was never going to forget about Edward. If it makes Charlie happy then I guess I will.

"Fine dad. Got any idea?" I asked dully

"Yeah, Cornell, Brown or Yale?" he asked awkwardly

"Um, I want to go to New York. It's the farthest away" I said

"You sure Bells?" he asked

I nodded and started filling out the application form.

The next month I waited. I still went to school, it was only January. I saw Jake every other day. He eased some of the pain in the empty void that is my heart. I sighed and slowly pulled up into the driveway. I opened the door and lifelessly moved to the door. Right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot. Same thing. I checked the mail as always. Bill, bill, magazine, advertisement, bill and finally a manila envelope. It was addressed for me, from Cornell. I smiled the first I had in months, when I wasn't with Jake. I crossed my fingers and hoped that I made it. It would make Charlie happy.

I dropped my backpack and the rest of the mail and went into the kitchen. I sat on the counter and opened the package. First it was a folded up letter. I unfolded it and read it. It read:

Dear Isabella Swan,

I, behalf of the Cornell University Board announce that you have been accepted into Cornell. You have taken one of the last seats for this year's coarse. You want to major in writing and science; we have new teachers for both. I hope you enjoy your year at Cornell. Attached is the form to see if you are qualified for Financial Aid, your schedule, dates of Orientation and supply list. Enjoy this school year.

Yours truly,

James Anderson

My breath caught in my throat as the hole in my chest reappeared as I read the name James. James, like last year. James, like the killer. James the Vampire. Vampire. Edward. I broke down crying; I really couldn't care less if it was childish. My heart was shattered, just like all those things I destroyed, blaming my clumsiness. I remember what Edward said when I tripped over my own feet. "Love, you are adorable when your clumsy" he cooed. I of course blushed ten shades of red. Life was so perfect

But in reality, he doesn't want me. He doesn't love me. He says he will always love me in a way, but that's a lie. He just doesn't want me to feel bad. Not, that I am more than broken at the moment.

I smiled to myself at the memories of him flooded through me. This is how its going to be for the rest of my life. Living in his precious memory.

I type to Alice's old email, knowing she will never receive them anyways. I do it to get some of my thoughts off my chest, going to see Jake and typing to her are my favorite things to do. The only things that help my hole in my chest heal a little more, before it grows bigger at the memory of him.

As the days dragged on it was orientation. Charlie stayed in Forks, cause of his job, and I was off to New York.

The plane ride was…bothersome, for a word. I sat next to a perverted man who kept trying to touch…certain areas of my bodies, but he ended up with a bloody nose and a swollen jaw.

Before I knew it I was standing at the gate to Cornell. I took a deep breath and walked in. An old lady directed me to the cafeteria, where the orientation group would be meeting. I walked up two flights of stairs and a left. I froze when I read a classroom's sign. It read 'Professor Carlisle Cullen, Science Class A'. Were my eyes deceiving me? Was it really the father of my lover? I almost fell down. I quickly stumbled to the cafeteria, which had already started. They stared at me as I made my way to a seat in a table where no one was sitting at. My face was emotionless. I was numb, I saw Charlie's face and I immediately started paying attention.

"Welcome, Class of 2014!" said a tall muscular man with thick curly hair. It hurt to look at him; he looked so much like Emmett. The brother of my universe. Sadly, it wasn't Emmett. He was too old. "This year we are welcoming to new teachers to our staff here at Cornell. Please welcome professor Cullen and Miss. Hale!" he announced and I all but fainted. I saw Carlisle walk toward the man and looked out at us, tenderly. He scanned us with his eyes and when he saw me, he froze. Surprise and pity pooled into his eyes and I looked down, not ready to look at him. I peeked up and Esme and I saw a warm motherly like expression upon her lovely features. She looked so upset, like a mother would be when her child gets hurt. Carlisle had already started talking after regaining his focus, but I had spaced out. The one thing I knew about my future is that isn't going to be easy.

Um, I kind of made this story cause I had writer's block for everything else. I am pretty short that story won't be too long. ExB all the way!