Dean ran his hands through his short dark blond hair and sighed into the night air, looking up at the sky for a moment as he leaned against the Impala. He was truly fucked when it came to Castiel and how he felt about the man.
Dean had always been of the mind that one should never get too attached, that lovers come and go, pleasure fleeting and all that jazz. Even friends never stuck around for long, he'd learned, especially after finding out about his bisexuality. But Castiel had never cared about that sort of thing, or judged Dean for any of his eccentricities. Castiel had stuck around for years, become like family to him. And now Dean was in love with his best friend.
It wasn't a sudden thing. It was the slow sort of love that had grown over years, sneaked up on Dean like a ninja so subtly he hadn't even noticed until it was right on top of him, absorbed in everything he was and everything he did. And hell if he knew what to do about it.
If Dean were to be honest with himself, which he he was getting around to, his feelings for Castiel made him want to give up the sort of romantic lifestyle he's grown accustomed to and try a more settled approach. Hell, he was basically dating the guy already.
He heard footsteps and turned to see Castiel, Sam and Jess walking towards him from their dorm building. Sam and Jess were deep in conversation about something that was no doubt dull and laced with inside jokes, while Castiel was coming towards him as if on a mission, tan trench coat surprisingly having been left behind. He wore instead some form-fitting blue t-shirt and jeans Dean had never seen before, making it hard for Dean not to stare.
"Hey, Cas." Dean tried, voice cracking a little at the greeting. Fuck, what was he, a teenager?
"Hello, Dean." Castiel said, his gravelly voice unsure.
The four of them slid into the Impala, Castiel and Dean in the front, Sam and Jess in the back. Dean turned the key in the ignition, AC/DC coming to life on the stereo from the dash.
"You're, uh, looking good." Dean told his best friend next to him off handedly, looking over at him as he reached to shift out of park.
"Jess helped pick this out. She said it would be more appropriate than my normal attire." Castiel replied, meeting his gaze. A slight blush was evident on his cheeks through the light of the parking lot standards. "I'm... glad you approve."
Dean nodded, swallowing; right there were those blue eyes of Castiel's he often stared a little too long into, a gentle smile on his slightly chapped pink lips that he sometimes had a hard time forgetting about. Castiel smiled a half smile and Dean found himself returning one in kind, extending a hand to pat his best friend's knee.
"Did you get my text earlier?" Dean asked, hand lingering on the dark haired boy's leg. He'd sent his dorm mate a joke while he'd been on break, knowing Castiel was going through a particularly rough class with a professor he hated.
"I did, thank you. It really brightened my afternoon." Castiel told him, nodding. "Though it took me a while to understand. I had to ask Jo."
Dean chuckled and opened his mouth to reply, but jumped when Sam cleared his throat from the back seat.
"This is really cute and all," Jess interrupted, leaning forward to rest her elbows in the edges of the two front seats, "But if we could get to the party before everyone passes out that'd be super."
Dean removed his hand from Castiel's leg quickly and put the car into drive, nodding, ducking his head to hide the colour playing on his face. He hit the gas and they were off, ready to spend their Friday night thinking about anything but school.
"This is going to be so cool!" Charlie squealed, hugging Dorothy as she sat down next to the brown-haired girl in the circle. The party was going strong throughout the rest of the frat house, so to avoid most of the rowdiness Jo and Kevin had rounded up everyone they could find and sequestered them in the master bedroom for a rousing game of spin the bottle.
Kevin giggled delightedly as he sat between Jo and Castiel, already pretty tipsy. Sam had a pretty good glow on his face from alcohol as well, chatting with Jess in hushed tones. Castiel was listening to Meg go on about something on his other side, her small pale hand on his forearm, glossy lips forming an amused smirk as she spoke quickly.
"I can't believe you talked me into this." Dean groaned, shutting the door behind him, taking a swig of his beer. This was definitely not the way he'd imagined spending the party. The kissing part, sure, but this was pretty juvenile. He squeezed on down into the only spot available, next to his best friend and dorm mate, Castiel. The aforementioned man turned his head and smiled at him, knocking his shoulder against Dean's in greeting. A warm feeling unrelated to alcohol fluttered in Dean's stomach briefly, and he swallowed as he tried to quash it.
"So who's going first?" Kevin asked, breaking Dean's focus on his best friend's face. He could still feel Castiel pressed in a warm line along his body from thigh to shoulder, and the thought was an ever-present underlying distraction. Dean cleared his throat and said nothing, looking around his collected group of friends for a volunteer to come forward.
"I'll go!" Jo offered as she leaned in and put her hand on the empty beer bottle, giving it a hearty spin. Giggles erupted as it landed on Sam, who blushed as he crawled forward through the circle and planted a chaste kiss on Jo's lips. Jo chuckled as she sat back down, her hand covering her mouth in embarrassment.
Sam spun the bottle next, the open end landing squarely on Kevin. A chorus of low excited murmurs flared from the group as Kevin and Sam laughed before shuffling forward into the circle in tandem, lips meeting awkwardly over the bottle. Sam scrunched his nose as he sat back on his heels, wiping his lips with the back of his hand. Kevin pointed and stuck out his tongue, eyes shining with mirth.
"Here goes nothing..." Kevin said as he reached in and spun the bottle, ending up with Charlie. Charlie rolled her eyes but followed the rules and planted one on Kevin, adding a comical smacking sound to the end for added effect.
Charlie crossed her fingers with one hand as she spun the bottle with the other. It made its way around a couple times, and she sighed with disappointment as it slowed to a stop on Dean. He didn't take much offence; Charlie was a lesbian after all, but there were worse fates than having to kiss him. She made quick work of it, lips hitting more of his cheek than his mouth. Dean wiped the remnants of her chapstick from his cheek with his fingers and sent her a mock glare, earning him a wink from the red-haired girl.
Castiel nudged Dean with his knee when he was taking too long, and Dean blinked at his best friend, startled. The dark-haired boy nodded his head towards the center of the circle and shot him his patented half smirk, and damn if Dean didn't find that adorable... Shaking it off, Dean smirked back as he clasped the bottle in the middle of the circle. He twirled the beer bottle, looking back to his best friend and giving him a little push back as if to say "there, I did it". But Castiel wasn't looking at him. His eyes were glued to the bottle, which had since stopped spinning.
Dean looked down.
The mouth of the bottle had landed on Castiel himself.
Oh.
Dean looked up as he felt Castiel shift next to him, green eyes meeting those beautiful blue ones he couldn't seem to get enough of anymore. His gaze flickered down to watch the dark-haired boy subconsciously lick his lips. He was sure he did the same, and as he looked back to meet Castiel's stare everyone else in the room seemed to fade away.
He was finally going to get to kiss Castiel. His Cas.
Everything was happening in slow motion. Dean gently laid his fingers on Cas' knee as Castiel began to lean forward, closing the gap between them. Dean could feel breath on his face, hot and shallow, so close and getting closer...
"Clarence, come on, let's blow this joint!" Meg whined, drunk, tugging Castiel away from Dean. Castiel fell backwards into Meg a little, confusion in his eyes. Dean broke eye contact almost immediately, a mix of disbelief, anger and embarrassment in his chest. "Let's do some shots!"
"Umm..." Castiel muttered, still looking at Dean.
Dean looked back over and gave him what he hoped was a convincingly reassuring smile, raising his beer in a salute before taking a swig and looking away towards the rest of the group. His eyes landed on Sam, who gave him a pained look, which was the last thing he needed right then.
"... Alright then." Castiel sighed, stumbling as he stood, righting his shirt a little before following her out of the room and closing the door.
Dean looked around the room. Everyone was involved in their own drinks and conversation, having barely noticed what had just happened, everyone apart from his brother. But that moose somehow noticed everything.
Dean rubbed his eyes with the palms of his hands and stood, grabbed his beer and exited the room to find a different place to be.
"Voila, vodka shots!" Meg declared as she spun around from the kitchen counter, holding two disposable plastic shot glasses filled with clear alcohol. She held one out to Castiel, who refused to take it.
"I didn't come out here to do shots with you, Meg." He told her, arms hanging resolutely at his sides.
"Fine." She said, downing both shots before tossing the empty cups into the sink already half full of other used ones. "Go on, then."
"Why did you pull me away from the game?" Castiel queried, low voice still audible over the loud music reverberating throughout the house. "That was terrible timing."
"Clarence, that was the best timing!" She countered, leaning on the marble next to her, gesturing with her other hand. "You know what Dean is like. Your little crush is going too far."
"It's not a 'crush', Meg." He told her, voice absolute.
"You can do better than him. He loves 'em and leaves 'em, you've seen it your whole friendship!" Meg complained at him, moving closer so there were mere inches between them. "Do you want to be another statistic, or do you want to be with someone that actually cares?"
"Meg, I..."
"Clarence, if you'd just give this a chance..." Meg stated, running a palm up the dark-haired boy's bicep.
"I can't." Castiel shook his head, backing away from the contact slightly. "I'm in love with him."
Meg sighed, closing her eyes and shaking her head in return, hand dropping defeatedly to her side. She smiled sourly, meeting his eyes with a gaze that was both a bit forlorn and more so pitying.
"Well then, go get him." She offered, reaching to pour herself another shot of vodka in a new disposable glass. "But don't say I didn't warn you."
"Hello, Dean."
Dean shot Castiel a half smile as he approached from the house before turning back around to stare out at the empty backyard. The pool was glowing an unearthly greenish blue in front of him, lined by dim yellow garden lights. There was a smooth grey stone pathway that lead through the darkened lush lawn to the pine wood gazebo he was standing in. Dean was surprised his best friend had found him; he hadn't seen him since Meg had come in announcing that shots were to be had and he kind of expected that Castiel would be drunk at this point. His gait as he sauntered up and the lilt of his voice suggested otherwise.
The dark haired man came to stand beside Dean, arm brushing his, looking out at the pool with him in silence. Through the thin fabric of their shirts Dean could feel the welcome warmth of Castiel's skin, the sensation giving him goosebumps. The gazebo clearly wasn't small enough to necessitate their close proximity, but Castiel had always had a misunderstanding about the need for personal space. And while usually Dean didn't mind it, even found it comforting most of the time, after spin the bottle that evening his closeness was almost more than he could handle.
"Cas..." Dean started, turning to look at his best friend, intending on stepping back as he did so, just so he could keep his wits about him a little better. Castiel looked at him, head tilting in that questioning manner that Dean had come to consider adorable, and Dean found himself unable to make that distancing step. Because Dean really didn't want him to be farther away from him. He wanted him even closer. He wanted to touch him more than their current friendship allowed. He wanted to kiss him like he'd been denied earlier.
"Yes, Dean?" Castiel replied, voice low. He shifted so they were face to face then, a quizzical look in his eyes.
"Listen..." Dean began, speech almost a whisper despite the fact that they were completely alone. He sighed, trying to figure out how to say what he wanted to. "Back in the party, with the game and everything..."
"Yes, Dean?" Castiel coaxed, voice quiet like a secret. He reached across and put his hand in Dean's, squeezing it lightly. Dean felt his cheeks begin to grow hot as they flushed in the semidarkness, not used to the affection but somehow not averse to it when it came to his best friend. "Did I make you uncomfortable? The game meant for me to kiss you, did it not?"
"Yes, yes!" Dean assured him. He shifted his hand and threaded his fingers with Castiel's, a gesture that was entirely too intimate for the kind of relationship they were supposed to have. "You were supposed to kiss me."
"Good." Castiel nodded, smiling bashfully, eyes crinkling at the sides in relief. He squeezed Dean's fingers a little and sighed, breaking eye contact to look out at the pool. The breeze lapped the water against the sides, creating a calming sound reminiscent of a small lake.
Dean cast his eyes downward briefly to their clasped hands, worrying a lip between his teeth as he collected the gall to continue his point. He was so close; it would be a shame to give up now. Inhaling sharply, he looked back up to Castiel's face, the garden lights making him even more beautiful.
"... But you didn't." Dean added finally, breaking the silence.
"Dean?" Castiel asked, gaze falling back to Dean.
"You didn't kiss me." Dean managed, voice surprisingly steady for someone with so much on the line.
"... you're right." Castiel agreed forlornly after a minute of thinking, gaze flickering down to Dean's lips for a split second once, twice. He let his thumb trail up Dean's gently, his fingers squeezing their grip minutely. "Poor timing."
"How's now for timing?" Dean asked, inching a little closer, his nose rubbing slightly against his best friend's. He carefully brought his free hand up and placed it gently on Castiel's hip, provoking a slight gasp from the man. The urge to feel those light pink lips against his own almost overwhelming to Dean. "I know we're not playing the game anymore, but-"
"Dean, I was never 'playing' with you." Castiel whispered, and Dean could feel the breath on his lips as he shaped every word he spoke. The dark haired man licked his lips one final time before closing the gap between them and claiming Dean's mouth with his own.
The moment their lips connected in a soft pressure Dean sighed as if he'd been waiting his life for that specific feeling. Because he had been. Castiel let go of Dean's hand and brought both his palms up to cup his best friend's face, tilting his head to deepen the kiss. Lips opened as tongues tentatively met, gently at first, searching for acquiescence. Dean felt the dark haired boy man moan deeply as their bodies pressed flush against each other, arms pulling each other tighter to them.
Neither wanted to let go, but soon breathing became laboured, and Castiel broke away to lean his forehead against Dean's. Both were breathless in each others arms, touching anywhere they could.
"For the record..." Dean spoke, voice hoarse and low with desire, hands running up Castiel's back muscles through his thin shirt, "I'm not playing with you either... I really like you."
"I..." Castiel began, at a loss for words at his happiness in the moment. "Really?"
"Yea, Cas." Dean murmured, kissing him gently once more. Castiel hummed into the contact, smiling a little against Dean's lips.
"YES!" A call came from across the lawn. The two men broke apart enough to see Sam leaning awkwardly on Jess, a fist pumped in the air, clearly drunk.
"Oh my God..." Dean laughed at the display his younger brother made, all red from the drink and using his girlfriend as a crutch, while Castiel chuckled and buried his face in Dean's neck.
"Can we take the moose home? He's had quite enough." Jess called, face displeased but a smile in her voice.
Dean nodded, disentangling from his best friend and stepping to walk towards the couple. He stopped suddenly, turning towards the dark haired boy, who tilted his head and shot him that adorable confused look he so often did. Dean just smiled and held out his hand, ignoring the loud encouragements coming from his drunk brother across the yard.
Castiel smiled and took his hand, and together they walked back towards the Impala, ready to go home.